It’s got “Part One” slapped onto its title, threatening further installments, and it does feel like a threat. My advice? Cut your losses, and I say that to the developers and paying customers. Play Isolation for scares, play Dark Descent for something buggy but unique, play Fireteam Elite for straightforward (thankfully patched) shooting, but don’t bother with this thing. Following the past few years of Aliens games, for all their flaws and foibles, Rogue Incursion is just sad.

Marvel MaXimum Collection is a decent little package, as far as compilations of old ROMs go. There are a couple of genuine classics and even the lower quality stuff is historically interesting enough to be worth a look.

As entertaining as Toxic Commando can be, I dare say the next time I want to replay a Horde Shooter I’ll go back to something with a proper structure like WWZ or even Aliens: Fireteam Elite. In fact, my enthusiasm for replaying it is petering out already and that’s a real shame. The shooting and driving feel really nice while the bigger battles are genuinely great, but they’re framed in an overall package that fails to stand out, has no real identity, and few compelling reasons to keep returning. A classic case of being equal parts good and forgettable.

This is exactly the kind of adorable, sweet natured, and engrossing experience Pokémon should always strive for. It’s completely revitalized the series’ waning magic and I’m unbelievably happy it exists.

More than even the remakes, Resident Evil 9 celebrates the series’ legacy in its full breadth, and does so exquisitely.

I’m willing to bet High on Life 2 does not reflect whatever Squanch envisioned for it. I could practically smell the cutbacks and downscaling as I traipsed through a world that promised much more than it delivered, unraveling a story full of setpieces that didn’t come close to reaching their potential. It has funny moments, some great concepts, and it's better than the original in a few key areas, but the substance is in short supply. It's a step forward for something that's a step back.

Crisol: Theater of Idols excels as a lower budget horror with high ambitions. It's got its foibles and I can nitpick all day, but so much style and effort has been poured into it that I just have to come away impressed. Fantastic visual and audio direction does a lot of the heavy lifting, taking this from a solid little homage to something more special. Creepy, intriguing, and with enough mechanical gimmickry to feel more different than it actually is, I’m certainly very glad I played it...Also, it’s stunningly cheap to buy for what it is. These days, that’s one of the most remarkable things anything can be.

What we have here is a bare bones remaster of Fighting Force and its crummy sequel, featuring only the most obligatory of modern conveniences. The paltry options menu, meager archive material, and total lack of border imagery demonstrates little of the love shown to other Limited Run releases. Fighting Force itself still has something to offer a very niche audience, but as a member of that audience I already have a version of Fighting Force, one with more options for fine tuning and without a $19.99 MSRP

The dreadful studio that brought you Quantum Error has delivered a game very much in line with its library of shameless trash. It is legitimately sad that not enough people knew of its lineage before Code Violet benefited from a whole lot of ill-gotten hype.

Octopath Traveler 0 is, in my opinion as a series fan, the best installment so far. With its gripping plot points, astounding villains, and a litany of gameplay improvements, I’ve been hooked on this game to a major degree. While the town building could have been better, it’s far from bad and just adds to a game that’d be stellar without it. An excellent RPG, through and through.

Blood: Refreshed Supply is Blood with a bit more Blood, and I’ve always got time for Blood. I’m happy to see it on console, but that feeling’s been tempered by the introduction of significant bugs and a questionable value prospect. It’s a shame I can’t be completely positive because there are welcome improvements. With some patching up and marking down, this could be the definitive experience Nightdive wants it to be.

At $29.99, the price is frigging obscene for just how little you get, and how little of that is enjoyable....Marvel Cosmic Invasion is a short, flimsy, and overpriced beat ‘em up that offers so much less than its contemporaries in the genre. Skating by on brand recognition, it’s amazing how tired of it you become despite being able to finish the dire campaign in almost no time at all. The game’s barely done wiping its feet on the mat before outstaying its welcome, and it’s ready to leave soon after. Awful shite.

Tomb Raider: Definitive Edition does a basic job of presenting the 2013 classic on Nintendo’s latest hardware, but expecting anything more than that will lead to disappointment. In fact, expecting exactly that may still be a letdown if you think it’ll look anywhere near as nice as it should. This is a game being pushed on how wonderful it looks, but it just doesn’t look good on the Switch 2 at all.

When it comes down what truly matters, I can be a dingus mushroom and wear an eggshell for a hat. That alone makes Kirby Air Riders one of the best spin-off games a platformer’s ever had.

I take no pleasure in admonishing this remaster. Sacred 2 occupies a small but precious space in my heart, and I’m shocked to see how disastrously this has turned out. There’s still fun to be salvaged from the wreckage, but I can’t ignore the fact that Sacred 2: Remaster qualifies as a defective product. I have so many questions about how this came out in the state it’s in, but one query stands above them all.

Enjoyment can be finely sliced off of ARC Raiders like edible shreds from a doner kebab smeared in shit. That these slivers are entirely dependent on its players is hardly a triumph of the base experience, which is generally boring, flavorless, and lacking much of a point. If not for one intensely fragile hook, this is a sub-mundane peashooting box breacher that, despite a lack of originality or quality gameplay, still needed help from an algorithm.

The word “slop” has recently been overused to the point of death, and that’s a shame, because I’d very much like to call Double Dragon Revive slop. It baffles me how you can put out something this ugly and unenjoyable without attaching an apology to it instead of a price tag, but that's videogames for you.

The Painkiller of 2025 is not the purist’s Painkiller. It’s nonetheless a great time and it absolutely relishes in exactly the kind of straight shooting chaos I’d want from such a game. Weapons are so pleasingly tumescent that I’ve consistently had fun in the face of flaws and irritating dialogue. I only hope 3D Realms can populate Purgatory with a few more hooks, because I don’t want to see what’s currently there fizzle out too quickly.

Combining a block breaker with a survive ‘em up is brilliant, the pinball city building is a giggle, and the inventiveness that runs throughout the entire production is utterly brilliant...It’s a whole load of balls and I love it.

If you took out the branding and populated it with generic creatures instead of marketable pocket monsters, Pokémon Legends: Z-A would be rightly seen as a sub-mediocre and sloppy RPG, the kind with 115 "mostly negative" user reviews on Steam. Game Freak knows how much grace the public affords Pokémon and has taken the absolute piss with it, churning out a cheap budget game with a premium price, expensive DLC, and a ten buck markup to get a decent framerate...The audacity of this exploitative cash-in is honestly quite disgusting. At least Ekans is in it.

I love Ghost of Yōtei. I adore the classic mold of Atsu’s revenge tale - it’s the kind of story for which “formulaic” is more compliment than criticism. I appreciate how rich a toybox has been provided in its combat. I give it immense credit for the transformative way it uses passive enhancements to so strongly influence a player’s active playstyle...It’s a beautiful production full of mechanically enriching treats that can make a player feel like the sports car of assassins. Seriously, when is Sucker Punch going to make a John Wick game? All told, I’d say this is some of the sleekest, tastiest action I’ve seen from the big budget space in a long, long time.

Hades II isn’t Hades, and it’s the only thing keeping Hades II from being as remarkable as Hades. While it can’t surprise players in quite the same way, this game’s bottle contains so much duplicated lightning that only a player with unrealistic expectations could be disappointed. It’s an engrossing audiovisual treat that’s structured beautifully and boasts gameplay I struggle to keep away from...In all honesty, I wasn’t sure if Supergiant could make a sequel that did such an impressive game as Hades justice. I had doubts that any developer could match such an insurmountable creation. Hades II isn’t more than a match, but it's absolutely worthy of standing alongside it.

Sonic Racing: CrossWorlds is a great little game. As well as availing itself of as many genre features as it could carry, it’s quite possibly the smoothest kart racer I’ve played and certainly one of the nicest to handle. With a cute set of gimmicks and solid customization options, its biggest problem is lacking enough modes and maps to quite cover a significant unlock grind.

Dying Light: The Beast benefits from a more focused approach than the series usually has. Its obligatory suite of repetitive jobs still wears thin during extended play, but overall I enjoyed this one more than the prior outings. It’s a leaner game with a better story and some nice touches. Some of the series’ long running flaws still need ironing out, and without them we could have a legitimately great game. On a personal note, it’s really nice to see this series improve as it has over time. Despite being a vocal critic of its shortcomings, I want to love Dying Light, and if this represents where future games are going, I may just get what I’m hoping for.

We’re on the fourth game and series fatigue has kicked in, that much is true. We have four games maintaining the same consistent pitch and tone, with the same structure, the same feel, the same missions. I can still play Dynasty Warriors and stay awake, so my getting tired of this routine should be a pretty strong indictment...Borderlands could have done with a shakeup, but a substandard grappling hook and an obscene number of fetch quests in which players take luggage for walkies isn’t it. Such banality permeates what is otherwise a decent enough shooter, impacting so many other elements that it wrecks things. Adding to that is a one-note tone and huge technical difficulties, making Borderlands 4 a far from “premium” game.

Cronos: The New Dawn is far and away the best work Bloober Team’s put out and a splendid survival horror game in its own right. What starts as a post-pandemic Dead Space cover version becomes its own brand of scary that conditions paranoia into its players with undeniable expertise. There's a great script to go with the A-grade psychological puppeteering, and the whole package deserves to be seen as a genre classic...I am truly impressed.

I can’t fault the work that’s gone into making the collection, but it is a collection of clapped out garbage. They put in way too much effort to make the videogame equivalent of those novelty VHS tapes in the 90s that nobody was ever really expected to watch but got as gag gifts on Christmas. That’s all Bubsy is if we’re brutally honest - a fucking prank.

Shinobi: Art of Vengeance is a very well put together game. Slick presentation, watertight controls, and clever level design combine in a wonderful return for Joe Musashi. It might not be enough of a challenge for some, and it has some issues with upping its ante, but overall? Quality stuff.

Metal Gear Solid Delta might be the least necessary remake ever produced, but it might be my favorite remake for exactly that reason. It’s just Snake Eater with modern graphics and controls, and that’s actually more than I’ve come to expect from the industry these days. By being such a faithful reissue, Delta has secured its place as the definitive way I play MGS3 - I can’t say that about any of the more imaginative remakes we’ve seen in recent years.

Kirby and the Forgotten Land: Nintendo Switch 2 Edition is an old game with an obscene new price tag that doesn’t offer anywhere near enough to convincingly get away with it. The original game was great, but this package is a cash grab from a company intent on selling its flagships out. It's really sad to see Kirby, my favorite Nintendo series, used to normalize this exploitative new price point.

It doesn’t quite have the variety and spark of Mario Odyssey, though it does offer a lot of the same rewarding collectathon structure. Unlike most of the ground beneath DK’s feet, it’s really solid stuff.

Mafia: The Old Country could easily have been phoned in but the effort is evident - it sincerely does its best, and its best is good enough. Will it make a huge mark on history? Unlikely. Is its “pseudopen” world a vestigial albatross? Absolutely. Did I enjoy it? Perfectly adequately.

An utterly ill-advised redub is just one of several puzzling disappointments. The House of the Dead Remake wasn’t perfect, but it tried a lot harder, with better controls and more features. By stark contrast, this is a wonky and flimsy followup that has no excuse for playing worse and delivering less...Oh, and the first remake’s on sale for $2.49 right now, so if you wanted just one of these games, the choice is bloody obvious.

Unfinished Business is pretty much a full game in an expansion’s clothing, likely not billed as one due to the single location and lack of story relevance. The premise and new toys are cool, but the brevity of touted additions like ED-209 is disappointing and OmniTower can get too samey. Lovers of Rogue City will get good mileage out of it though, even if it won’t blow anyone away.

It would be great if Bendy and the Dark Revival was the BioShock-inspired horror production it wants to be, but that would require more than cheap jumpscares and thoroughly awful combat alongside equally impoverished stealth. It’s not just undercooked, it’s bloody raw.

Ultimate Edition works as a solid showcase of the Switch 2’s capabilities, at least between the occasional crash. It generally runs great, and playing such a massive production in handheld mode is a hell of a novelty. You can use the Joy-cons to activate commands via gestures, though as usual with such things, gyro’s best used for a little refinement while aiming...Whether on the Switch 2 or not, Cyberpunk 2077 is a fantastic RPG, especially after years of bodywork, and it has some of the best storytelling you’ll get out of the “AAA” space. I’ve played it so intently that I don’t even cringe when I hear cyberslang like “choom” and “preem” anymore...Can’t think of a more nova endorsement than that, ya gonk!

I smiled when I first started playing this thing. I was directly controlling Unimarutchi, exploring the world with literally my favorite character, but my smile faded within seconds of realizing what Namco had dared to shovel in front of people and charge for. There’s nothing to explore, nothing to enjoy, just the grinding menial filth of a game that doesn’t give a f.ck.

I won’t accuse FBC: Firebreak’s developers of not caring, but I fear that may be less of an insult than suggesting they actually tried. Everything about it screams obligation, like nobody involved had their hearts in it, and I almost hope that’s the case because I'd feel truly gutted for anybody who thought they'd made something terrific. What a shame.

A lot of flash and some substance, it’s a very fun game in a package that doesn’t live up to its massive potential, much less the massive price tag it’s introduced to mainstream gaming.

Poorly made and ineptly designed, MindsEye cosplays as an open world game to its own detriment. The lifeless cardboard realm we could generously label a "world" is aggressively closed off, its sandbox appearance nothing more than desperately shallow dressing for a cover shooter so bereft of features it’s bloody embarrassing.

Elden Ring Nightreign is worth taking out for a few runs, but the incentives to keep on running aren't quite there yet. The prospect of ending another forty minute expedition empty handed after an anticlimactic wipeout isn't quite coaxing enough.

This appalling paid-for tutorial is inexcusably lazy on top of being just plain inexcusable to begin with...The only thing Welcome Tour has welcomed us to a brand new breed of garbageware.

Fantasy Life’s biggest problem is a complete lack of ambition, being interested only in replicating what was done ten years ago despite how much should have been done to update the gameplay and make something truly worthy of a promising concept. It’s definitely got its enjoyable side, and its aping of Nintendo games gives it some longevity, but otherwise this is a so-so retread of an archaic game that was always far too limited compared to what it claimed to be. And its NPCs need to just glue their mouths shut. Stop. F.cking. Talking.

What a lovely game it is. Onimusha 2: Samurai’s Destiny has its faults, but it aged really well and it’s been a blast replaying a PS2 title I truly loved back in the day. A welcome throwback to a time where publishers would put out some genuine curios, ones that stayed with me for life.

Tainted Grail: The Fall of Avalon is doing its little best, and if Skyrim is a hallmark of roleplaying quality, then Tainted Grail’s best has to be good enough.

Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 is the epitome of an instant classic. Its premise alone had something special to it, but no elevator pitch could have prepared me for how the thing blossoms and blossoms and blossoms. Exciting battles and beautiful writing unfold in a world that looks and sounds sublime, all of it pulled off with unbelievable style. I’m in genuine awe of the accomplishment.

Days Gone Remastered is an entirely basic upgrade that feels every bit like an attempt to shake some loose change from a dormant product. I’m sure the original has fans who are less ironic about it than me, but they’re the only people this’ll really speak to. If Days Gone didn’t win over enough people for Sony’s liking the first time, a slightly better looking reproduction probably won’t change matters much.

Croc: Legend of the Gobbos needed much more than the veneer it’s received. It was dated out of the gate and aged like milk thereafter. With visual upgrades that inadvertently make it look worse, and no improvements to the clumsy gameplay beyond fixing its abysmal controls, this is the definition of an unnecessary product...Some retro games require a little work to bring them up to standard, and Croc required far more than that. Without the extra effort, we’re left with a reminder that, honestly, Legend of the Gobbos just wasn’t a good game.

As an accessible alternative to radioactive shooters with an endearing British flavor, Atomfall provides a good deal of fun. Sadly, it offers self-defeating design choices and literal eye pain alongside it. All the elements of a truly great FPS are here, all the potential in the world is waiting to be realized, and if not for a pile of dropped balls, it wouldn’t have tripped and fallen off that course...Plus, again, actual f.cking eye aches.

It’s a delightful adventure, dripping in imagination. It’s a saturated mess, prone to tedium. It has a knack for redefining itself in truly engrossing ways. It has a mean spirit that facilitates truly vulgar environmental design. Its world is breathtaking and vast. Its world is hateful and myopic. It sounds incredible. It sounds unbearable. It’s intensely absorbing. It’s offputtingly self-indulgent.

As much as the games industry doesn’t want to acknowledge it, the existence of those alternative routes is an inevitable consideration, and that’s especially true for Suikoden.

Centum is a gripping point-and-click trip, drawing players in with disturbing imagery and a disquieting atmosphere before laying on a terrific critique of generative AI - as well as the kind of people who want to exploit it. Striking a nice balance between enigma and clarity, it presents a world you can’t fully trust contrasted against sincere messaging. It’s so much more than freaky rat men drooling everywhere. It’s evocative and heartfelt, and has freaky rat men drooling everywhere! An algorithm couldn’t pull it off half as well.

A great game that would have been almost perfect if Capcom had gouged out the first thirty hours and put a plug in the pernicious verbal diarrhoea of a quest board masquerading as an NPC.

Avowed ought to have been a more linear action game. Combat is good enough that a streamlined and direct experience could serve it well, but as an RPG there’s simply not enough of anything. It feels like vast chunks are missing, with an initial promise of adventure that rapidly shaves off expectations until you’re left with a toothless story and a frustrating dearth of material...It’s fun to create a snowstorm and jab lizard men with spears, but the shallow trudgery between fights is consistently disappointing. I don’t think it’s unfair to have expected far more from Obsidian. Thanks to Avowed, I know I can expect far less.

WARRIORS: Abyss wants to be a Warriors game and a Hades game at once. The best way of doing that is not to duct tape the disparate elements together and hope it all works in the end. That’s what this thing does though, and the result is a visually stressful, mechanically conflicted mess...It can be enjoyable at times, but only in two cases - when a run starts and it feels like a Musou game, or when the thing’s nearly over and you have a power rating in the millions so the chaos becomes hilarious. Even then, however, the sheer tedium and frustration that characterizes the majority of the experience makes those fun bits simply not worth the effort.

Dynasty Warriors: Origins is one of the best disappointments I’ve ever played. The groundwork it lays could’ve been the basis of a genuinely amazing Dynasty Warriors game, but this one is so obvious about its corner cutting, and conflates “realism” with a lack of personality. The huge battles are impressive, general combat’s rather fun, and the parrying system works way better than I thought it would, so there’s a good wad of stuff to enjoy. I just wish Origins was an actual Dynasty Warriors game and not something so flavorless.

Mouthwashing is a psychological horror game that, without a doubt, earns the “psychological” part of its designation. Within a futuristic setting is a contemporary story containing multiple themes of ghastly relatability. I cannot think of another game that upset me to this degree. It spoke so intimately to my personal trauma that playing it felt awful - and I mean that as a compliment, I truly do...It hurts. And it’s beautiful.

Marvel Rivals is a good time. Its large cast of characters has something for almost everyone, and they play quite differently outside of a few redundancies. Despite this, gameplay is fundamentally standardized, and things become routine once you’ve found your main picks. It’s not a game I can see myself sticking with for a very long time, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth a go - indeed, for a way to spend a few hours at a time, it’s a fine enough choice.

“Vampire Survivors but it’s an FPS” is a solid idea with so much potential to wind up as an ill-advised mess. Vampire Hunters does the concept justice with a thoughtfully produced game that not only serves Survive ‘em Up gameplay in a fresh format but pops a ton of clever little touches on top. Despite its name sounding like that of a videogame mockbuster, this is the kind of fresh flavor any overly saturated genre sorely needs.

Indiana Jones and the Great Circle brings a level of authenticity you almost never see for videogames based on movies, even among the good ones...There are many things I can moan about, from the sometimes trivial challenge to the backtracking to the terrible UI, yet there are plenty of things I can praise in turn. The delightful impact of delivering blunt force trauma to a Nazi, the dense use of space, the sincerity of the atmosphere, and that amazing Harrison Ford impression. Sure, it’s marred by many little issues, but The Great Circle's a good bit of adventuring fun in the face of them.

If one were to judge it purely on a remastering job, The Thing is one of the most impressive games released this year. To preserve the feel of the original while enhancing so much about it is an incredible feat performed to an astounding degree. It’s a game of the year contender for as long as we don’t look at what the game is. Sadly, we have to, and that game is The Thing. Sod it, let’s just slap an inoffensive 7/10 on it. S’only a game, innit?

Comedy games are considered notoriously difficult to pull off, but ones like this demonstrate that the challenge isn’t inherent to the medium - it really just comes down to how many people making games are actually good at comedy. Death of the Reprobate, with humor that’s sharp and dumb in equally amusing measure, is some damn good comedy - and maybe more than a little damned.

Angel at Dusk may not be up there with the most essential shooters, but its bonkers concept and sickeningly beautiful visuals help it to stand out while the aggressive combat provides plenty of fun. Well, until repetition starts to set in. An enjoyable time, especially if the average shooter isn’t enough like Videodrome for you.

I no longer feel like I missed something when I gave up on the original as a kid. The streamlined controls got me further than I ever did in the 90s, but all to be found was tedium. The remake does little to liven it up, but at least there’s some crude entertainment in marveling at how shockingly buggy it is. It serves neither as a polished update nor an impressive reinvention, and confirms more than anything that Little Big Adventure is best experienced by watching a Longplay of the bloody thing.

Sorry We’re Closed not only pays homage to classic survival horror, it provides a truly unique love story that delves into the very nature of romance itself. For all its theming and grisly imagery, however, there’s a script with a pointed sense of humor and a cast of fun characters to match. Combat has good ideas set back by some awkward implementation, but the moments of annoyance aren’t enough to pull down the sum of all parts.

Slitterhead is full of great ideas and some truly memorable examples of body horror despite not feeling like much of a horror game. Perhaps with more of a budget behind it, those positives could’ve been done justice, but sadly this isn’t the case. The possession gimmick allows for imaginative action scenes that are let down by repetition, lacking variety, and a bunch of less thought out gameplay that bogs the action down. Someone throw some money behind this concept, please. It deserves to be in a much better game.

Dragon Age: The Veilguard is heavy on the action, light on the bullshit, and gets progressively more enjoyable as you expand your abilities and get used to some wonky controls. Its tone, art direction, and exaggerated combat is most certainly not the Dragon Age of old, but what can I say? It’s the Dragon Age I’ve enjoyed the most, even if I can name a laundry list of things that piss me off about it....The fact you can make it very gender is a huge positive, especially since the only people claiming it’s “forced” on you are lying through their stupid teeth. It’s there to help more players feel seen, and that’s only a good thing.

Even though I famously hated Frontiers and still do, I want it to get a direct sequel because I want a version of the game I can actually love. That said, playing Sonic Generations X Shadow has me hoping Sega never forgets that kind of game either, because I’ve been reminded that when 3D Sonic platforming is good, there’s nothing quite like it.

I’m so tired of this manipulative garbage. I can't wait to stop being addicted to it.

Starship Troopers: Extermination may share similarities with Helldivers, but it absolutely does enough to distinguish itself and I think I prefer it. With 16 players and massive hordes of Arachnids, the sheer scope of chaos is both intimidating and enthralling. Building a base from scratch is straightforward and lots of fun, as is trying to keep the thing from toppling over.

Transformers: Galactic Trials is overpriced and full of nothing. The gimmick of switching between vehicular racing and robotic shooting might have worked if both halves weren’t so thoughtlessly welded together like a shoddy cut-and-shut car. Then again, its meager content and technical sloppiness suggests it never had a chance...Also I’m still seething at the lack of Starscream.

All things considered? Silent Hill 2 Remake is an almost excellent game that just couldn’t help itself. It does so much to impress, but the obnoxious elements are so consistent they ensure Team Silent’s masterpiece is far from bested...I never want to see another Mannequin again in my life.

While it likely won’t be remembered to the same degree as “bigger” Zelda installments, it’ll absolutely go down as a classic to me. Echoes of Wisdom is brilliant in its creativity and versatility, one of the best in the series as far as I’m concerned...Also, Octoroks. Octoroks for days.

I’m absolutely a fan of the spin-off, with World Brothers 2 carrying on the quick, accessible, and nonsensically entertaining action of its predecessor. It’s packed full of fun toys, drowns the player in content, and you can play as a woman who thinks she’s a horse. She spawns carrots behind her when she sprints. How is that not what videogames are all about?

Halls of Torment is more than simply Vampire Survivors wearing Diablo’s clothes. It’s a clever and engrossing Survive ‘em Up that uses RPG trappings to add a ton of versatility and rewarding complexity to what would still be a fun game without it. There’s a pile of quirky character classes and a massive number of ways to build them during each run, just a big pile of content and not a shred of it feels like padding.

Cynical doesn’t even begin to describe such a poisonous display of IP leverage. There’s something actively nasty about the thing. It’s a reminder that creativity is not owned by the creators, it is imprisoned by the least creative among us, those of us who force others to dance but can't carry a tune.

Astro Bot is one of the best games I’ve played, period. A jubilant little adventure that dedicates itself fully to making an audience happy. For a neurodivergent player the visuals, sounds, and DualShock textures are indescribably satisfying. The accessible design makes it perfect for both children and adults. It’s a wonderful mascot platformer, the likes of which I’ve severely missed, and it’s the most tasteful way a game company has ever patted itself on the back...For once, the pats are well earned.

It’s just one of those games - the ones you like but have to acknowledge are riddled with things to complain about. Fun and frustrating all at once.

It’s the best game about a toy cat using his sentient hoverboard to dismember killer unicorns you could play this year.

To say there’s a lot to hate about Concord implies it has a lot of anything. While not strictly skeletal in content, it nonetheless offers little of note in a market that’s already saturated with similar games all vying to dominate the finite time of their players. Sony’s delivered the perfect picture of a game nobody was asking for, an impeccable example of the nonessential product. Even if I didn’t hate it, I sure as hell wouldn’t find enough to love.

It should be nigh impossible to f.ck up releasing Doom at this point, but trust this collection of utter clowns to find not just one, but several ways of doing so. DOOM + DOOM II oozes carelessness and ineptitude all wrapped up in an attitude of apparent contempt. Still, the remixed soundtracks absolutely slap.

It’s a potentially great experience brought down to decent by its enthusiasm for trudging bollocks.

Thank Goodness You're Here! rolls around in its Britishness to an almost obscene degree, but more than that it is simply… stupid. Majestically, gloriously stupid. It’s a wildly entertaining little adventure that revels in its own ludicrous indulgences. It delightedly broadcasts a sense of humor that some may find puerile and unappealing while others will find it puerile and very appealing...Thank goodness I’m in the latter camp.

Flintlock: The Siege of Dawn isn’t a particularly necessary addition to the Soulslike genre. It doesn’t stand out in any major way, and it’s certainly rough. It is nonetheless amusing in its own scrappy way, the many tools at the player’s disposal are well presented, and after a touchy start it develops into a decent bit of fun...Just a shame they didn’t stick with the trench stuff. Quite a missed opportunity to separate itself from so many similar games on the market. Oh well.

Clickolding is quiet and calm in spite of its unsettling undercurrent. Through straightforward interactions and a lot of clicking, a tone and subject is strongly established. I found it affecting enough to power through moments of monotony that my ADHD really didn’t care for, and I won’t forget that weirdo mask in a while at the very least.

Anomaly Pools has jumped on the liminal bandwagon with a game best released under the guise of a freebie “experiment” rather than a game that charges too much even at $1.99...Sorry. Having finished critiquing this, I feel like I’ve wasted all our time.

The First Descendant is the last thing I want to play right now, nauseated as I am by how much of a swindle it is. Designed entirely to frustrate and trick money out of players, it gives nothing in return but the same “live service” mundanity that’s soaked the market in an ocean of filth...It’ll probably be dead within a year like so many of its sordid ilk. That would be a genuinely good thing for the industry and for the players it’s trying to scam. I hope it dies on its toxic vine.

Still Wakes the Deep is an impeccable horror production, a gorgeously sickening nightmare in a rarely used setting propelled by stellar acting and sublimely nasty body horror. It’s more than just “The Thing on an oil rig,” though it makes good on that elevator pitch too. It’s going to remain with me for a long time. A true genre classic.

With an actual hint of production value, Garten of Banban IV is better, but it’s nowhere near acceptable. The larger environments lead to obscene amounts of backtracking, while the story and scares are as sad as ever. It is every bit the ugly, exploitative commercial its predecessors were.

They say familiarity breeds contempt, and the more time I spend in this series’ dismal world, the more relatable a statement that becomes.

Puzzles are more tedious, scares are more pitiful, and for all its expanded gameplay, this sequel manages to be no better than the last.

Ugly and threadbare, both mechanically and aesthetically, Garten of Banban has spread its lumpy legs and given birth to one of the most cynically manufactured franchises of all time.

Killer Klowns from Outer Space is just another intellectually lazy application of a horror movie license. Well done game, you made murderous space clowns boring… that’s one hell of an achievement.

How f.cking dare Star Wars: Hunters? I really hope it becomes yet another “service” game that’s been shut down in less than a year. It deserves to be burned to nothing.

Senua's Saga: Hellblade 2 can be a mentally taxing experience by design, especially if one already has their own litany of mental health struggles. It is a necessary part of a game that explores its themes touchingly and tastefully, a beautiful and astoundingly stylish production. Like its predecessor, the presentation outstrips the gameplay, which suffers from repetition and a lack of escalation or variety. It’s a damn fine thing in totality though, one well worth digging into.

Indika is a treasure of a game, an adventure that truly defies expectations. Constantly surprising and laudably bold in its subject matter, this story of a questioning nun and the devil in her head is among the best things I’ve ever played. A little dash of jank does nothing to take away what this game is - a landmark of strange and fascinating storytelling.

If you’ve been frustrated by the state of some retro horrors, or even if you haven’t, this is a fine addition to the genre that deserves to be ranked highly among the modern examples. Aside from those bastard traps, it’s a damn good bit of body horror.

Despite the reduction of novelty as it progresses, Slayers X is nonetheless a fantastic idea executed very well. Retro indie shooters are a dime a dozen, but hardly any of them commit to the bit quite like this brilliantly stupid follow up to Hypnospace Outlaw...It’s the kind of nonsense I’m just incredibly happy to see exist in the world, and the possibilities it offers for potential future games set in this universe has me on the hook.