Surprisingly boring. Murakumo's plight is the result of shallow and uninspired game design. [Mar 2003, p.88]

The AI is horrendous, all the great tweaks in "NBA 2K3" are MIA, and most of the fun is gone, too... People in dorms are going to have to get pretty drunk to get any enjoyment out of this. [Jan 2003, p.96]

The biggest problem with Rivals is that it doesn't feel like you're skating ice. [Dec 2003, p.174]

"Quotation Forthcoming"

Denied Ops offers the bread and butter of deathmatch, team deathmatch, and conquest, but nothing about this tacked-on feature set stands out. I suppose you could say the same thing about the entire game.

It pains me to level a harsh judgment against a game that’s trying something new and innovative, but Octodad doesn’t balance the frustration with the funny.

If you don't die of boredom playing the game, you'll run headlong into the most disappointing aspect of P.N.03: It can be completed in a measly four hours. [Sept 2003, p.111]

The stealth gameplay is repetitive and unoriginal, sucking all of the cheeky fun from the Japanese franchise. [Feb 2004, p.103]

While the GameCube has several genres it excels at, the tactical shooter field clearly isn't one of them. [Sept 2004, p.112]

The huge level of frustration is not worth the time it takes to master the awkward gameplay idiosyncrasies. Instead, it’s more tempting – even as someone with experience – to just spam the waggle movements for a passable high score.

I enjoy challenging games when there’s a rewarding payoff. With Thumper, the reward of doing well is just more Thumper. If you’re really into the game’s bleak conceit, you may have the patience to hang with it for the duration. Personally, I was ready to leap out of the trough and never look back.

NBA Live 15 may not be ready to stand shoulder to shoulder with its competition, but with much improved presentation and mechanics the series is trending in the right direction. The remaining gameplay issues and lack of mode depth, however, makes it tough to recommend this particular version.

Sunset has some great elements, especially in terms of diverse characters and intriguing subject matter, but that doesn't excuse its shortcomings. As beautiful and contemplative as the writing is, I spent too much of the game frustrated by glitches and bored by exploring the same surroundings.

Do yourself a favor and steer clear of this one or there's a good chance that your Xbox will come to life, beat you to a bloody pulp, and steal all of your valued possessions. [Feb 2003, p.105]

You'll pray [the Banner] stages end quickly. But, of course, once they do come to a close, you find yourself back at square one - bored to death by The Hulk's repetitive nature. [July 2003, p.109]

The huge level of frustration is not worth the time it takes to master the awkward gameplay idiosyncrasies. Instead, it’s more tempting – even as someone with experience – to just spam the waggle movements for a passable high score.

Without question, the only suitable home for this game is in a molten river on Mustafar right next to Anakin's legs and arm. [July 2005, p.117]

Although Narcosis’ runtime is fairly short (about four hours), it’s padded by frustrating stealth segments and banal puzzle-solving that get in the way of some great storytelling and voice-acting. While captivating, those aren’t enough to make this experience worth wading through.

My favorite level was when I chased a car around for 10 minutes, trying to destroy it. Wait, that was my least favorite level. Wait, that's EVERY level! [Oct 2003, p.123]

Oh, how many restless nights have I spent yearning for a Koei game that would combine the worst parts of "Dynasty Warriors" with those of "Samurai Warriors"! [Oct 2007, p.113]

Like an antithesis to Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, it proves that two great flavors don't always taste great together. [Issue#203, p.87]

As a party game, London Games succeeds rarely, but its implementation of recognizable (and unrecognizable) characters from Mario and Sonic is perfect. It definitely has all of your favorite characters in it, but that's not enough of a reason to play.

Oh, how many restless nights have I spent yearning for a Koei game that would combine the worst parts of "Dynasty Warriors" with those of "Samurai Warriors"! [Oct 2007, p.113]

Two dorks driving around in an incredibly ugly and generic city chasing bad guys with laughable AI doesn't qualify as good entertainment. [Oct 2003, p.136]

In this day and age, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that a game based on a movie fares poorly, but for a character who has survived since 700AD, he deserves better treatment than this.

I was ready to love WrestleQuest, and some enjoyment can be found for those with the patience and fandom to fireman carry them along. But the imaginative ideas die by a thousand cuts that hold Muchacho Man and his friends back from world title contention. The game has cool ideas; it just needs more refinement and a serious reexamination of certain systems before it’s ready for the big time

Even in this realm of sub-average platformers, you have several better options than Mushroom Men. [Dec 2008, p.124]

Unfortunately, these new features don’t overcome the horrible driving controls, laughable braking, poor draw distances, and the complementary pop up. Only die hard fans of the Dreamcast series should give this game a look.

Attractive visuals only carry the game so far. Just when I finished one infuriating, monotonous boss fight I'd get thrown into another directionless, obtuse puzzle room.

The AI in this title is some of the worst I’ve ever seen. [Feb 2002, p.87]

I'm genuinely sad that a game rooted in the joy of Disney failed to evoke any in me, but Epic Mickey 2 is so disjointed and rambling, I was ready to escape Wasteland when the time came.

While the first "Rumble Roses" game was a fun, solid wrestler with some cheese-cake amusement, XX simply feels aimless, dull, and a little offensive. [May 2006, p.104]

The Wii U version also offers excellent graphics and motion controls, but exhibits some slowdown at times.

Junction Point's obvious affection is the most redeeming element of this sequel; from the structure of puzzles to the implementation of the cooperative experience, nothing ever coalesces into consistent entertainment.

Despite multiple shortcomings and my general aversion to the game’s writing, High on Life has occasional glimmers of potential. I’d like to see a sequel polish and improve upon this foundation. I’m always itching for more creative takes on shooters, but High on Life is a reminder that “different” doesn’t always mean “good.”

Midway tried really hard to inject humor into the characters and cutscenes, but as is often the case in games, it comes up short. If there aren't developers who can be funny, I suggest companies hire somone who can. [Aug 2003, p.98]

In this day and age, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that a game based on a movie fares poorly, but for a character who has survived since 700AD, he deserves better treatment than this.

The idea of empowering user-generated art as a gameplay element is a concept that works well on the DS. However, with poor execution and clumsy controls on the Wii, you'll find more fun with a coloring book and a 64-pack of crayons than you will in Drawn to Life: The Next Chapter.

Its gameplay is well below today's standard for console FPS. Horribly clunky hand-to-hand fighting also rears its ugly head. [Jan 2004, p.135]

Denied Ops offers the bread and butter of deathmatch, team deathmatch, and conquest, but nothing about this tacked-on feature set stands out. I suppose you could say the same thing about the entire game.

I didn't hate every second I spent with this platformer. The music is great, the early Genesis-era stages are plain and simple fun, and the Sonic 2-style special stages make good use of the handheld's 3D to gauge depth. However, the lack of worthwhile new content and sloppy level design makes the whole product feel like a rushed tie-in to the superior console version.

In this day and age, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that a game based on a movie fares poorly, but for a character who has survived since 700AD, he deserves better treatment than this.

The game squanders its stylish setting, writing, and entertaining puzzle solving by minimizing the fun investigation segments, focusing squarely on broken combat and platforming.

Three phases to describe The Hulk: technically solid, aesthetically pretty, and phenomenally dull. [July 2003, p.117]

A relatively simple RPG made moderately unbearable by its slow pace and confused menus. It doesn’t help that the game world is so generic, from the cookie-cutter story to the drab and overly familiar fantasy-themed environments.

After previous publisher THQ folded and 2K took over this series with WWE 2K14, I had hoped the WWE games would see a slow crawl out of mediocrity, and that wrestling fans would eventually have a wresting game they could be proud to show non-wrestling fans. Unfortunately, the 2K series has carried forward with the same by-the-numbers combat we’ve seen for years. 2K’s next WWE game doesn’t need to check off a list of incremental improvements – it needs a complete overhaul.

I can't imagine the conversations that led someone to decide that this sparse (though accurate) game would be a good idea. [Oct 2004, p.140]

You know the drill: extremely linear level designs that stitch together corridors, open areas, and dull objectives with all the refinement and subltlety of a drunken quilting circle. [Mar 2006, p.100]

Until a patch can resolve the glaring flaws, this isn't worth your time, much less your money. [June 2004, p.136]

The Star Trek franchise is built on the concept of a hopeful future, but fans should keep looking toward the horizon, because this present trek is hopeless.

Denied Ops offers the bread and butter of deathmatch, team deathmatch, and conquest, but nothing about this tacked-on feature set stands out. I suppose you could say the same thing about the entire game. [Apr 2008, p.86]

Perhaps if it had been delayed to iron out the bugs, Wrestlemania 21 could have been a champion. [June 2005, p.132]

The platforming levels are derivative and uninspired. Though dull, these sections are broken up frequently by minigames that, more so than in "Spyro Orange," are frustrating and not very much fun at all. [June 2004, p.139]

You'd be hard pressed to find a title with more sheer, concentrated boringosity. Like the movie, expect this one to fly way below everyone's radar. [Oct 2004, p.147]

At a distance, it looks like an RPG, but it's really just a robot-themed "Power Stone" with some weak story elements in between battles. [Apr 2004, p.101]

Random button pressing will get you farther than most attempts at strategy, and getting locked into long combo animations is a "feature" that makes me just want to die. [Sept. 2006, p.100]

A merely passable game...Why have a White Castle hamburger when you can have a juicy steak? [Aug 2004, p.103]

I can't think of a single reason to spend time with Maniax when far more polished fighters like "Dead or Alive Ultimate" and "Mortal Kombat: Deception" are available. [Aug 2005, p.102]

MK Advance may look GBA, but it plays GBC, and that's the killer. [Mar 2002, p.91]

Just way more trouble than it’s worth.

Movement feels floaty, hit detection and collision issues are everywhere, and enemy AI is painfully stupid. [Jan 2005, p.118]

Focusing on detail over substance is definitely an interesting design, but without a solid gameplay package, it amounts to nothing. [Nov 2003, p.168]

Top off this stubbornly shoddy gameplay with un-funny cutscenes and a glaring lack of online play and, well, there isn't much here to be super happy about. [Apr 2005, p.117]

Sure, Pokétopia might sound a lot like the trips you took to Pokémon Stadium 1&2 or that weekend at Pokémon Colosseum. That’s because this is the same trip, we’ve just repainted the signs and moved to a different system.

Without any degree of difficulty, however, you don't feel like you are doing anything other than making your tour guides talk.

There are things about Mario Party 9 that make it a better experience than previous entries, but overall it's still a disheartening experience. The best times I experienced with the game were the times when co-workers and I were laughing at each other's stupid mistakes while playing, but you really don't need a video game to fuel stupid mistakes worth laughing at.

Just a mishmash of concepts that never really gel into anything great. [June 2004, p.139]

Super Bomberman R 2’s best parts are the ones carried over from older games in the series. Messing around with friends in local and online matches is still fun, and if that's all you're interested in, it's a fine enough experience. Unfortunately, that’s a small portion of the game, making it hard to recommend.

Unfortunately, the cartoony graphics, stilted shooter gameplay, and completely rancid car missions fail what could otherwise be a passing game.

Top off this stubbornly shoddy gameplay with un-funny cutscenes and a glaring lack of online play and, well, there isn't much here to be super happy about. [Apr 2005, p.117]

Moments of interesting presentation appear here and there, but too many other aspects of Tiny Brains are sloppy and incomplete.

Unfortunately, the cartoony graphics, stilted shooter gameplay, and completely rancid car missions fail what could otherwise be a passing game.

Tiresome and repetitive.

If you liked the boring, archaic gameplay in the first volume of the new .hack trilogy, you can look forward to more of that junk here.

Unfortunately, the cartoony graphics, stilted shooter gameplay, and completely rancid car missions fail what could otherwise be a passing game.

Challenge mode offers a few uninspired minigames like banana catching and log hopping.

Movement feels floaty, hit detection and collision issues are everywhere, and enemy AI is painfully stupid. [Jan 2005, p.118]

Ultimately, Kingdom Come feels a bit like homework. If the historical setting and focus on realism appeal to you, then the deep gameplay systems and methodical pace are worth learning. If you'd rather be a magic-wielding wizard or the unequivocal hero, on the other hand, the source material will bore you almost instantly.

I think it's worse than its predecessor. [Nov 2005, p.163]

With an archaic graphics engine, dreadfully awful camera tracking, extensive load times, and some of the most atrocious mission challenges known to man, it becomes quite clear where this game went wrong. [Jan 2003, p.89]

It can sometimes be literally painful to make your way up to the top of the mountain, but the reward is impressive. Being in VR adds a level of believable mobility where you can track and admire the progress you make by pausing and looking around. I felt like I was up high, and the reward of getting to simply look around when making it to the top is one worth pursuing. Some of my favorite moments involved trying to figure out where the ambient sound of birds or helicopters were coming from as I looked around, taking a break from the climb. Unfortunately, the impressive vistas were not enough to keep me from dreading the next ascent. [Tested with Oculus Rift]

Something hard to define is missing from My Time at Portia. It mechanically ticks many boxes that simple-life fantasies are supposed to, but it lacks the charm and satisfaction that springs from its peers in the genre. It demands your time without enticing you, and places you in a world that feels hollow. Games like this are supposed to make chores fun and rewarding, but playing My Time at Portia feels more like actual work.

It’s not frightening or disturbing. It’s just extremely frustrating.

The huge level of frustration is not worth the time it takes to master the awkward gameplay idiosyncrasies. Instead, it’s more tempting – even as someone with experience – to just spam the waggle movements for a passable high score.

The only thing this game does right is not inflict an ancient curse on the player. [Aug 2006, p.85]

Where X2 really makes its rushed development cycle known is the camera, collision, and enemy AI. [June 2003, p.109]

A colossal disappointment, largely because Acclaim lost sight of what made gladiators cool in the first place. [Nov 2003, p.144]

ReCore is a poster child for wasted potential. At its heart is a good (though not great) game, marred by long load times, technical problems (including frame rates dips and the occasional crash), and bad pacing. The infuriating and frivolous road blocks may have doubled the length of the 20-hour game, but they also halved my fun.

It feels clever and promising at first, but doesn’t change its approach when the formula wears thin.

Graphically, Nightcaster eats acid. The textures of the ground and rocks are barely N64 quality. [Feb 2002, p.90]

I can't think of a single part of this I'd like to see again - unless it's the graphics engine being reused in a completely different game. [Oct 2005, p.136]

One look at Extinction’s artwork may conjure thoughts of Shadow of the Colossus and Attack on Titan. While attaining the scale of these games, it doesn’t succeed in delivering the awe factor of engaging a new giant. They all look the same and you know what you need to do to drop them. Extinction ends up being shallow, repetitive, frustrating, and little more.

A flat-out crappy game. [Jan 2004, p.135]

Go to your local game store, hand the clerk your money, and buy something other than Opoona. [Apr 2008, p.95]

Cartoon monkeys are cool. This game is not. [Jan 2005, p.125]

The Hobbit: Kingdoms of Middle-earth lures you in with the promise of a strategic city builder, but once you’re on the hook, the fun dissipates as you are repeatedly penalized unless you keep a steady stream of costly mithril flowing through your city. I like strategic city-building games, and I like Tolkien’s universe. I don’t like The Hobbit: Kingdoms of Middle-earth.

The single-player experience can be completed in a few hours, and the painful minigames give you good reason to skip the multiplayer.

It's crippled by an over-reliance on the worst game design cliche ever invented: too much collecting. [Aug 2004, p.102]