El Matador's story, characters, and gameplay add nothing new to the shooter genre. There's nothing here that's stupendously bad, but nothing good that's memorable either.

Jack's narrative is amusing, and pirates are just deliciously cult and cool. But the game walks the plank when you realize that it's a bland, buccaneer version of God of War.

It's all not as bad as it could have been, but nothing you can't get from dozens of other games.

It's all not as bad as it could have been, but nothing you can't get from dozens of other games.

You might have some fun if you've never played another Naruto fighting game -- but anyone who's spent time with the franchise will find this pales in comparison to its predecessors.

The game should be called "Harry Potter and the Half-Assed Game."

You can take a game of tic-tac-toe and throw a whole bunch of spicy house rules on it, but let's face it: You're drawing friggin' circles and Xs. Yggdra is a competent example of the tactics genre, but there are others (Fire Emblem, for one) that do everything Yggdra does more simply and are just a lot more fun.

Pteredon manages to nail a few things fairly well, but it's not enough to light up the entire game, and all you're left with in the end is awesome female Vietnamese voice acting.

MS Saga lies just below the threshold of a good game, and the shine of its customization and gripping boss combat is dulled by lackluster, rote storytelling and lifeless presentation.

There is still a better product for consumers to pick up this year, and this is not it.

As I played through Dynasty Warriors 6, the series' first entry for this console generation, one thought kept permeating my head: "This is exactly the same game I played in college."

Despite the stylishly designed menu display, the attractive mechs, and the occasionally breathtaking clash between LFOs, Eureka Seven Vol. 2: The New Vision is just too uneven a game to recommend to anyone besides the hardcore fan base -- who have already purchased this game.

All of the things EA did right with FIFA World Cup 2006 are overshadowed by the simple truth that what should be the most fun part of the game -- having exciting scoring chances -- is completely negated by shoddy game performance near the nets.

Vandal Hearts may be competent at what it does, but its derivative throwback nature doesn't do much for a genre that's in desperate need of innovation.

The only redeeming factor about Bomberman Land is the inclusion of the archaic (but still awesome) Battle Mode. While it's lacking a bit in options -- only six modes to choose from -- at least it's a blast to battle it out with your buds.

The one bit about Spy vs. Spy that really shines is the presentation. Each level looks radically different than the last, and comes complete with its own, unique challenges.

The voice command system in EndWar is terrific, and hopefully, future games will take advantage of a similar control scheme. It just isn't enough by itself to raise the game beyond "mediocre RTS." It's definitely worth checking out to see voice command done right, but overall, it lacks the depth and substance to bring anyone over from superior PC alternatives.

In its weird little way, it's fun, but not quite $50 worth of fun.

For all its flaws this one's still fun for a short kickaround, but in the end it's really nothing more than a softcore novelty.

Sticking unwanted attitude onto a couple of characters doesn't create empathy -- developers should've learned that from the '90s.

Quirk enthusiasts will be disappointed, mainstream gamers will only find more to support their suspicions about those "weird" games, and Capcom is in danger of believing that small, strange games like this won't do well.

Street-racing nuts won't get the satisfaction they want, while fans of the original Rush franchise will be disappointed that their favorite series has been reduced to another ride-pimpin' also-ran.

Sonic Rivals 2 is a technically complete game, but in the altogether more important areas of inspiration and design, it's sorely lacking.

That the game outperforms its 3D siblings seems to have happened almost by default: the other games are so poor that this mediocre product seems sterling by comparison. Taken on its own merits, though, it's just not particularly good.

Save for a tedious gimmick level in the Hundred-Acre Wood, each stage follows the same basic structure: work towards the first cutscene, which provides the key to the second cutscene, which provides the key to the boss. There are no puzzles or complex paths to work through -- once you've solved one, you've solved them all.

Malice is so generic and mediocre that its release only serves to spoil what little status it had as the punchline of a joke.

Appreciation goes out to Koei for attempting a new direction for the series, but they could have left out the dull repetition. Struggling with the motion controls in the first few stages, being forced to traverse on rails (and when the rails do come off, dealing with awkward movement), and facing wave after wave of repeated enemies just isn't all that fun.

Too many corners were cut to ensure the timely shipping of this PS2 release, and Rockstar Vienna's lack of care shines through.

The controls -- namely character acceleration -- feel awkward and counterintuitive; for instance, you're forced to hold forward on the left stick to accelerate while also trying to steer your character. The tracks are a mishmash of right-angle turns and jumps that sometimes lead you down random paths, requiring several runs just find your way around the track.

Long stretches of each stage can be severely frustrating and annoying, but when they're not, it's still pretty fun -- and getting "in the zone" to complete an especially hard part in one try is always satisfying.

Malice is so generic and mediocre that its release only serves to spoil what little status it had as the punchline of a joke.

If the idea of playing an absolutely average (and not particularly lengthy) Resident Evil adventure with incompetent A.I. allies is exciting, then hop to it.

But retro compilations are practically a dime a dozen these days, and next to the likes of "Namco Museum Battle Collection" and "Capcom Classics Collection," the games enshrined here show both their age and a general lack of inspiration.

For all its flaws this one's still fun for a short kickaround, but in the end it's really nothing more than a softcore novelty.

On the presentation side, with colorful, cartoony graphics and contributions from the voice actors, it should satisfy the legions of Simpsons fans. But as a game, it's decidedly mediocre-at-best fare, with levels that vary in quality and pedestrian platforming and beat-em-up action.

It's more flattering to look at Killer App as another handheld arcade collection with a great upgraded multiplayer version of Light Cycles and a simply bad adventure game thrown in as a bonus.

Overall, when stacked next to its PS2 counterpart, the PSP version of Ghost Rider is on very weak legs.

In the end, there's absolutely no reason to choose this one over these other versions: Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, Xbox, or even PSP. If you're a Madden beginner, just play an easy level on a different console.

Never does it become particularly fun, though it's quietly engaging in its own methodical, repetitive way. It's not a full-price purchase by any means, and it's nowhere close to the high action-RPG bar set by Champions of Norrath on the PS2 three and a half years ago.

Take those problems and add on yawn-inspiring and occasionally frustrating level design and a grand total running time of about six hours for all but the slowest of gamers, and you've got another licensed movie game that's decidedly mediocre.

187 basically defines "average." While the graphics err on the nicer side and the story dips a bit below the equator, most of the game is competent but unspectacular. Every good feature seems to have a bad one that balances it out.

The problem with this control innovation is that the game often requires you to perform very particular movements (such as jump in the air, and grab a pole with your whip) with imprecise controls forcing you to playing the puzzles over and over until you are ready to rip your fur out.

Like Mario Bros., the Famicom Mini version of Dr. Mario suffers from a single terrible flaw: it was completely obsolete long before it was ever released.

A disappointing compilation of ambition without practical delivery. It's a game broken into several fundamental components that never work on their own and never contribute to a whole that can be appreciated.

The game feels too labored and doesn't have enough thrills to lock us in. When it comes to handheld baseball, 2K7 isn't even a wild card compared to the champ, "MLB 07: The Show."

I was so frustrated at the game, the entire experience was comically agonizing, sort of like a newer Martin Short "film" that tries to be funny but winds up being hilarious for all the wrong reasons.

Xiaolin Showdown has the elements of a good game, but the execution is so sloppy and shallow that it ends up falling flat.

If there ever was a game destined to attract a cult following for its strange design decisions, Colosseum is definitely it.

It's hard to even say what's good about the game, because every attempt to get at the fun parts is like swimming to shore with lead weights on both feet.

Those who have drained every last moment of enjoyment from the DS game might appreciate it as a way to eke a little more challenge from the experience. And really obsessive types might appreciate the fact that the announcer guy from the cartoon performs (highly repetitious) running commentary during in-game battles. Everyone else, though, will simply regard this as a waste of money.

The game could have been so much more bearable if they had simply changed the camera operation. The camera is not in your usual third-person perspective, and it quite often faces her, making gameplay very difficult if not impossible at times.

187 basically defines "average." While the graphics err on the nicer side and the story dips a bit below the equator, most of the game is competent but unspectacular. Every good feature seems to have a bad one that balances it out.

Despite an entire review's worth of problems, Fantastic Four isn't a complete loss. It has some nice-looking effects ("flaming on," specifically), a decent joke or two, and some nice extras to unlock (old Fantastic Four comic covers, alternate costumes, etc.), but it's just not compelling in any of the basic areas it needs to be.

Xiaolin Showdown has the elements of a good game, but the execution is so sloppy and shallow that it ends up falling flat.

The predominant problem with Drakengard is that it's boring to look at. The level designs don't seem designed much at all.

Point-and-click adventures can be great, but more often than not they end up being tedious and mundane. CSI: Miami falls squarely into the latter category, despite the high production values and being so faithful to the source material.

Despite an entire review's worth of problems, Fantastic Four isn't a complete loss. It has some nice-looking effects ("flaming on," specifically), a decent joke or two, and some nice extras to unlock (old Fantastic Four comic covers, alternate costumes, etc.), but it's just not compelling in any of the basic areas it needs to be.

UGnG gets the superficial bits right, yet the fundamental elements that have always made the series so compelling despite its esteem-crushing difficulty are either missing, compromised or broken in this sequel. And without those crucial underpinnings of quality in place, the entire affair collapses in a morass of mediocrity.

If you have little cousins who don't care what kind of games you buy them, but just enjoy getting new games for their PlayStation 2, this is what you can get them. If you got it for yourself, you'd probably forget you owned it in about a week.

For nearly 14 years, fans in North America have been waiting for a true follow-up to Secret of Mana. After playing through Dawn of Mana, I can safely say this: It appears that wait will be, quite appropriately, never-ending.

With three friends on a couch with you, this is a solid 7. Considering that friends and a couch don't come in the box, it's more of a 3. I'm going to compromise and call it a 4.5.

Fans into beat-'em-ups will find there's not enough to captivate them, with way too much repetition even for that genre. Likewise, RPG nuts will grow too upset with the unending pattern-like progression and clunky management. And if you happen to like both, the combination just won't be enough to make you squeal with joy.

After the grueling long exploration levels, I found myself craving a good catfight. Unfortunately, the simple combos and lifeless combatants make the fighting in the game more like a catnap.

Unless you fancy yourself a hardcore DC comics fan, you'll find little to hold your interest in DCUO in its current state after the first several hours of gameplay.

It attempts to emulate the spirit of its bigger cousin, but it falls short.

Dance Dance Revolution X broadly sidesteps innovation and serves up another entry where enjoyment's purely a function of how much you like the set list. If you own any other DDR games, particularly last year's SuperNOVA 2, it's hard to recommend shelling out cash for this one -- aside from the new tunes, I've seen it all before.

If you're masochistic and don't mind awkwardly paced gameplay, you may actually enjoy Uprising. For everyone else, playing this game feels like paying someone $15 to punch you in the face over and over again.

I figured the move to the PS2 would, at the very least, allow for a bit more detail in the bland levels. I could not have been more wrong. Compared to the PSP version, this is a step down -- that's disappointing enough. But compared to other PS2 Ratchet games, it's a sharp kick in the nuts.

Remarkably shallow and underwhelming.

The game is like Manhunt, except with adorable teddy bears. Wait -- can you compel your victims to kill themselves in Manhunt? No? OK, maybe Naughty Bear's actions are slightly worse.

As a basic XBLA port at half the price, RayStorm might have made for a fun novelty. But it's frankly bewildering that Taito is charging $15 for an extremely marginal upgrade to a game that we played some 13 years ago.

I'm just not convinced that this grab bag of half-baked ideas and gratuitous filler makes for a great videogame. And I learned something about myself, as well: It takes a lot more than sassy books and hermaphrodites to keep my interest these days.

Remarkably shallow and underwhelming.

Missing modes -- no online, no Campus Legend, no create-a-player, and no minigames (which is a must for the target audience) -- further illustrate the game's shoved-out-the-door nature.

It's a terrible system and it's sure to alienate all but the hardcore C&C nerds. But those of you who stick around, those of you who are willing to put up with the ugly graphics, the pointless online-only requirement, and the mandatory grinding are liable to end up as the small dedicated player base for yet another one of Electronic Arts' disastrous attempts at online gaming.

When I'm in the market for an RPG, it's for a select few reasons: I'm looking for an epic story, rad loot, combat that stimulates the tactical chunks of my brain, and beautiful environments. White Knight Chronicles does none of these things well. To top it all off, the game inexplicably ends after less than 30 hours with most of the major plot points left wholly unresolved.

As a stand-alone download, it's a short rendition of the Watchmen brawler experience that features more low points than high points -- but with an admittedly awesome moment of Rorschach punching a fat pervert.

Somewhere deep within Fracture, far, far below its offensively derivative crust, lies a worthwhile, original game. It's very much a game with a gimmick -- terraforming terrain on the fly -- and while that gimmick works well (if a bit too predictably), Fracture is thoroughly unexciting.

The lack of a versus mode is a gross oversight that makes versus battles an uncomfortable chore (the winner can't switch characters without resetting the entire game -- just like in the arcades!).

Saw's derivative gameplay -- which even includes sliding around crates (or racks of frozen pig carcasses) and searching dressers for hidden valves to shut down nearby pipes spewing hot gas (did that happen this often in the movies?) -- has all been done before, and done better by titles like Silent Hill and Condemned.

As a stand-alone download, it's a short rendition of the Watchmen brawler experience that features more low points than high points -- but with an admittedly awesome moment of Rorschach punching a fat pervert.

While hardcore adventure-game fans might find enough here to warrant a purchase, this game's meant for PC, and it simply works (and looks) far better on its intended platform.

As a stand-alone download, it's a short rendition of the Watchmen brawler experience that features more low points than high points -- but with an admittedly awesome moment of Rorschach punching a fat pervert.

Bully's biggest problem is that it's a shoddy port job, rife with technical missteps that wouldn't warrant comment if they weren't so profoundly damaging to the game.

The lack of a versus mode is a gross oversight that makes versus battles an uncomfortable chore (the winner can't switch characters without resetting the entire game -- just like in the arcades!).

My issues are that this game is so damn generic, shallow, and content with being nothing special, it surprises me that it asks you to pay full price at the door.

Via Domus is fan service through and through, and does deliver one genuinely amazing moment via its ending.

But sadly, the strength of the game's characters doesn't lead to a positive, or memorable, gaming experience.

Rocket Bowl can be a brief and pleasant diversion for minigolf fans or those who enjoy the idea of fantasy bowling with a new set of rules, but others may want to ball outta control elsewhere.

Double Helix obviously had good intentions, but, as a whole, Front Mission Evolved is completely unnecessary.

Double Helix obviously had good intentions, but, as a whole, Front Mission Evolved is completely unnecessary.

I hesitate to say that Iron Man is dumbed down for the Wii, PlayStation 2, and PSP, since hardware limitations likely necessitated such a distinct iteration, but the resulting experience is a by-the-numbers affair unlikely to rouse most action fans.

So while Operation Darkness could've lit up strategy nuts, the completely awful camera and primitive PlayStation 2-quality graphics drain the life out of it. Even online co-op, the one unique feature that actually justifies Darkness' place on the 360, is about as fun as waiting to get your blood drawn.

Saw's derivative gameplay -- which even includes sliding around crates (or racks of frozen pig carcasses) and searching dressers for hidden valves to shut down nearby pipes spewing hot gas (did that happen this often in the movies?) -- has all been done before, and done better by titles like Silent Hill and Condemned.

Online multiplayer amplifies everything that is good and bad about Fatal Inertia EX. Again, the combat is fun, and it's especially rewarding to pull off attacks on another human player.

Problem is that neither the strategy nor combat elements are developed in any meaningful way. All but the most strategy-savvy gamers will regard the capture-and-hold mechanics as primitive, and as for the combat...well, I really wasn't kidding with the Dynasty Warriors comparison.

Just a bad shooter in its bones. Whether the cops or the robbers win a matchup is still mostly dependent on who gets there first and camps out with line-of-sight to the objective. Lack of locational damage means hitting someone with a sniper shot is going to make them half dead whether the bullet hits someone in the face or the ankle. Other than the tweaks mentioned earlier the vast litany of complaints we had about the game the first time around still stands.

It's a disappointment that a franchise so (ostensibly) devoted to endless creativity could produce a game so limited in its meaningfully creative options. In the end, Spore Hero never becomes anything more than a lighthearted but uninspired platformer -- and a waste of the brand's creative potential.