Activision chose overwhelming mediocrity.

It’s the kind of game that believes plonking players in a brightly lit space is enough audience engagement to satisfy.

This is an absolute horror show of a game and I cannot recommend anybody buy it or even accept it for free. Sod this Attack on Titan ripoff.

Zenith isn’t just badly made – it’s appalling. A boorish, cynical failure of a comedy game broken in ways I’ve never before seen. The fact it somehow – everso rarely – manages to show a glimmer of wit under all the misery only worsens the deal, highlighting how this could have perhaps been something decent before it was run through whatever thresher led to it becoming the mangled carcass it is...There is no cure for the disease this game carries. The kindest thing to do is take it out back and put a bullet between its glazed, gormless eyes.

I take no pleasure in admonishing this remaster. Sacred 2 occupies a small but precious space in my heart, and I’m shocked to see how disastrously this has turned out. There’s still fun to be salvaged from the wreckage, but I can’t ignore the fact that Sacred 2: Remaster qualifies as a defective product. I have so many questions about how this came out in the state it’s in, but one query stands above them all.

Transformers: Galactic Trials is overpriced and full of nothing. The gimmick of switching between vehicular racing and robotic shooting might have worked if both halves weren’t so thoughtlessly welded together like a shoddy cut-and-shut car. Then again, its meager content and technical sloppiness suggests it never had a chance...Also I’m still seething at the lack of Starscream.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutants in Manhattan is one of those games that avoids being truly deplorable despite my having nothing nice to say about it. It didn’t infuriate me the same way Star Fox Zero did, and it’s not a broken pile of junk like Homefront: The Revolution. It is, however, lacking a single noteworthy highlight, and the only positive point I can make is that I didn’t completely hate it...I didn’t like it. I could barely stand to stick with its overwhelming mediocrity...But hey, I didn’t hate it...I didn’t hate this disappointing little waste of time...Well done, game!

At best, it’s a curious relic from a bygone era of videogames in terms of both mechanics and attitude. At worst, it’s an ugly and boring game where the most interesting aspect is the prevalence an of inconsistent framerate despite looking like garbage. The worst part is, I have the horrible suspicion that Valhalla believes it made something really, really good. And that just makes me incredibly sad.

A grim part of me actually looked forward to this. Good or bad, I thought we’d get something provocative or remarkable in some way, shape, or form. Instead, we got a prosaic and outmoded little pile of cynicism. Perhaps worse than that – we got a damn boring game.

I smiled when I first started playing this thing. I was directly controlling Unimarutchi, exploring the world with literally my favorite character, but my smile faded within seconds of realizing what Namco had dared to shovel in front of people and charge for. There’s nothing to explore, nothing to enjoy, just the grinding menial filth of a game that doesn’t give a f.ck.

If you hated Operation Racoon City, I urge you to try it again after playing Umbrella Corps. You’ll think it’s fucking amazing...At least it doesn’t have microtransactions, weirdly. At least not yet.

Due to poor funding or a bankruptcy of talent, GODZILLA is a sad excuse for a game desperately attempting to be a worthy adaptation of the beloved monster series. Cheap, bumbling, and interminably boring, it’s a bargain basement budget release with the unbelievable gall to present itself as a major “AAA” release.

Left Alive is Metal Gear Solid fan fiction gone horribly, horribly wrong...It's cheap, ugly, hideous, boring, broken, and not worthy of anybody's time.

This is already easily in the running for one of 2018’s worst game. Woefully inadequate nonsense.

Vogelsap created a purely frustrating product – something that could have, and indeed should have, been something special, only to squander its opportunities at every step...I’d love to see everything The Flock tried to do in a better game, but I fear the failure of this one will only dissuade others from attempting it.

Daedalic had an opportunity to prove the cynics wrong when so many people wondered what the hell the point of a Gollum game would even be. Instead, they handled this with such utter clumsiness they likely ensured a game like it will never happen again.

One thing I’m sure of is that Sega ought to be embarrassed for pouring so much hype, so much marketing money, into this project, only to have a sad, miserable little dog’s dinner of a product to show for it. I guess it doesn’t matter, though. It’s an idiotic baby’s game for children, and it exists to sell toys. It also thinks you’re all dumb, and it wears its contempt for you on its sleeve. A sleeve covered in bandages.

This is something we’d make fun of if it was on Desura for ten bucks, and that’s when this stops being a funny game and starts becoming offensive – because it isn’t on Desura for ten dollars. It’s a full-priced, $59.99 MSRP, retail “AAA” production bearing Tony Hawk’s name and proudly published by Activision...It’s really, atrociously unacceptable once that sinks in.

Stray Souls is easily one of the worst horror games ever made. The fascistic interests of its director aside, this is a defective product duct taped into a barely coherent mess of prepurchased assets, algorithmically generated art, and bargain bin genre tropes...To play it is to cringe at a rare extremity of creative shamelessness. This stunning example of maladroit artistic negligence struggles to achieve the deeply grounded bar of “playable” yet has the insulting nerve to try and claim a desperate connection to Silent Hill. The temerity of this crime against spookiness is off the charts...How dare Stray Souls? How f.cking dare it?

Poorly made and ineptly designed, MindsEye cosplays as an open world game to its own detriment. The lifeless cardboard realm we could generously label a "world" is aggressively closed off, its sandbox appearance nothing more than desperately shallow dressing for a cover shooter so bereft of features it’s bloody embarrassing.

The dreadful studio that brought you Quantum Error has delivered a game very much in line with its library of shameless trash. It is legitimately sad that not enough people knew of its lineage before Code Violet benefited from a whole lot of ill-gotten hype.

GameMill Entertainment continues its run of rushed, cheap, utterly contemptuous scam jobs. Yet another game where you can see how the developers at one point hoped to make something good until reality hit them in the face, forcing them to spray some vomit onto storefronts and call it a day...It’s only marginally better than Skull Island: Rise of Kong because I can f.cking laugh at it.

Nonsensical, ugly, broken, and often hilariously incompetent, The Quiet Man is confusing gibberish from beginning to end. Speaking of the end… hoo boy!

It’s disgusting on almost every level, and the fact Topware is selling it for $54.99 is unforgivable.

This could have been good. A dungeon crawler in the Overlord universe has some promise, but there’s just nothing here. No satisfying loot drops. No expanding combat ability. Nothing but braindead, horrifically designed combat. Oh, and a few utterly insipid pressure-plate puzzles. Because those are always fun...I fucking hate it...That is what I’m trying to say.

Alone in the Dark: Illumination is ugly in every sense of the word, not just visually – though it is about as attractive as an anus in an eye socket. Hideous both inside and out, it’s the consummate fraud that hides behind a recognizable name to deliver interactive poison.

Something ugly to the point of actively affecting gameplay, something that requires multiple reloading of saves to fix glitched doors, something that crashes when given a chance and boasts a user interface that actively fights the player. That this saw a release and expects to sell for real human money is lunacy. Then again, that’s this game all over – sheer, unbelievable lunacy.

I love State of Decay, and that needs to be communicated with all the sincerity in the world. I love that bloody videogame...State of Decay: Year One Survival Edition is a cynical rehash that needed to be much, much more.