Before the tedium set in, I had fun with Garden Warfare.

Companies ought to respect their history enough to let it be. [Apr 2005, p.128]

I have no idea why this title was even made. [Apr 2006, p.118]

The slowly paced story turns the fossil digging into a chore, and the real-time battle system starts to feel the same not long after that.

I definitely prefer Chocobos when they are being ridden into war, not when they are forced to climb beanstalks and play rhythm games. [May 2007, p.96]

With so many genuinely good action/RPGs that aren't riddled with archaic missions and gameplay, I have trouble recommending Nier solely on the basis of a decent (but unevenly executed) story.

Unlike "The Sims," which allows you to build your own destiny from the ground up, Playboy: The Mansion is done in by the very fact that all you can do is be Hefner. [Apr 2005, p.117]

I was often left scratching my head wondering why my bridges kept collapsing.

As interesting as the question of “What would mankind do?” is, The Station rarely has an answer. Perhaps thinking deeply about the dilemma is part of its charm, but it ended up being a hollow experience that didn’t deliver enough resolve on its alien ambitions.

However, the clunky controls, frustrating camera, and broken combat all spoil the game's flow. [Apr 2009, p.86]

While OutRun 2 has some moments (when the Viagra takes hold) where it's "still got it," the game is pretty much past its prime. [Dec 2004, p.183]

In the face of stiff toys-to-life competition, Vicarious Visions and Activision took a chance on a different style of play for this annual series, and it didn’t pay off. Here’s hoping the series gets back to the basics, or finds a fun new way to put the characters' personalities and talents front and center and not hidden behind a vehicle’s hull.

The levels and missions are equally unremarkable, which makes for yet another promising stealth title that doesn't live up to its potential. [June 2005, p.127]

Chasing Aurora has some cool elements, but overall I found the experience lacking. Flying the birds feels fluid, and the art style and character design of the birds are very enticing, but this game needs to be more than an incredibly shallow single-player experience and half-baked multiplayer modes.

Alone in the Dark can be applauded for its innovation, but it cannot be saved from its dysfunction. Had Eden Games added polish, or dare I say it, play-tested the game, it could have been a welcome addition for survival horror fans. [Aug 2008, p.85]

Journalism is far from a glamourous job, but stories that make a difference are the most gratifying part. Unfortunately, The Westport Independent never made me feel that was possible.

With a history including games like Knights of the Old Republic II and Neverwinter Nights 2, the team at Obsidian Entertainment knows role-playing. Alpha Protocol isn't necessarily a counter-point to that expertise; the RPG systems under the hood are solid. I just wish that I could experience them in the context of a compelling espionage adventure, not a last-gen third-person shooter.

Being average isn't what anyone aspires to be. [Dec 2001, p.109]

NES Remix is a fun little distraction for a while, and brings back plenty of memories. Some of those memories are great, and others are along the lines of remembering how much Ice Climbers sucks. This isn’t a must-play highlight for the Wii U eShop, but it’s worth spending some time with if you grew up with an NES controller in your hand.

The offerings are generally pretty decent (Word Whomp, Tri-Peaks Solitaire, and Poppit! are among the best), but there should be a lot more, considering that the website has hundreds to choose from.

The camera is troublesome, hit detection feels odd, and the characters are completely unbalanced. [Nov 2005, p.180]

While I appreciate the desire to try something new with the game structure after so many titles, the resulting mishmash of ideas is frustrating, repetitive, and unfriendly to both kids and adults.

Decent play mechanics aside, the gameplay doesn't excite. [Jan 2004, p.151]

My arms are sore from web swinging, I have a headache from fighting monotonous rounds of thugs, and I’m frustrated that in an “open world” I don’t have more control over my destiny. I guess it’s not as fun to be a superhero as I’ve always thought.

This is the first licensed game I've played that is actually shorter than its movie. [Aug 2007, p.93]

As an educational tool, Never Alone is a great success, but the gameplay does more to burden than bolster that achievement.

Rise of the Manhunters makes good use of the Green Lantern license, yet struggles to deliver an intense combat experience. It ends up feeling like an excruciatingly long game, despite it offering only six to seven hours of gameplay.

While Legends does offer you the most comprehensive Rocky experience to date, it just plain fails to deliver in the ring. [Dec 2004, p.165]

Plenty of people can put up with a bit of ugliness if there’s still a pretty good time to be had overall. For Modern Warfare II, the good time offered by its multiplayer and in glimpses within its campaign may be enough.

Rise of the Manhunters makes good use of the Green Lantern license, yet struggles to deliver an intense combat experience. It ends up feeling like an excruciatingly long game, despite it offering only six to seven hours of gameplay.

FlatOut desperately wants to be the trailer park version of EA's slicker racer, but without the polish, it succeeds in being only a pale imitation. [Aug 2005, p.98]

Breach & Clear's monetization scheme doesn't interfere with the gameplay, and although strategy plays less of a role than I would like, combat is still fun. However, the progression system and customization options fall flat, and the game needs more than one simple mode and 15 maps to remain entertaining.

This is the first licensed game I've played that is actually shorter than its movie. [Aug 2007, p.93]

The limited inventory system often forces you to waste items to make room, and multiplayer is a complete waste – unless prancing through the fields collecting faeries with a net is your cup of tea. However, for a children’s movie licensed game you could do a lot worse.

I rarely feel that my intelligence is being insulted by a game, but RoadKill managed to do the trick. The self-consciously "bad-ass" plot is devoid of humor or interesting characters. [Oct 2003, p.139]

The Enigma lives up to its name of being difficult to understand from start to finish. Telltale is all over the place in this episode, but the desire to be gritty and different is exposed too much, and the story suffers from it, feeling more like an odd one shot than the first part of something larger. Mysteries abound, however, and enough engaging narrative threads are left dangling to potentially right this second season’s direction.

Even with its brief length and scattered pacing, Episode 2 could have been noteworthy if it played to the strengths that propped up Episode 1. Instead, Assembly Required doesn’t bring the charm or the high level of action its predecessor does, and it ends up feeling like an epilogue rather than a full episode.

The other half of the Outlaw equation, the humor, left me cold. [Sept 2005, p.100]

The Enigma lives up to its name of being difficult to understand from start to finish. Telltale is all over the place in this episode, but the desire to be gritty and different is exposed too much, and the story suffers from it, feeling more like an odd one shot than the first part of something larger. Mysteries abound, however, and enough engaging narrative threads are left dangling to potentially right this second season’s direction.

Yakuza 3 does offer an involved, lengthy story for those with the patience to wade through the repetition and annoyances.

For the God of War completionist, there is a story incentive to play through Sons of Sparta. It builds on Kratos’ character well, shows a part of his life we have not had the chance to experience, and there is at least one small detail related to modern Kratos and his son that I am glad I learned. But it underwhelms on nearly every aspect of Metroid-inspired design without outright failing. Controlling Kratos, fighting, and exploring just isn’t particularly fun on a basic level. A just below perfunctory genre experience alongside characters and in a setting I admit I like spending time with.

I might have recommended this simplistic formula for younger gamers except for the fact that encounters with Omnidroid are some of the most tedious and unforgiving bouts I've ever fought. [Jan 2005, p.118]

It’s not that Combined Assault is hard. It’s more like the game is very impolite, barely introducing itself to new players. The control and game interface are showing their age, too. They weren’t very good even back when the first SOCOM came out. It’s probably time to rethink the way this game plays.

I wish I could say that Prisoner of Azkaban was a bold new start for the series. It's not, but this is a significantly better game than either of the previous two entries. [July 2004, p.111]

The gameplay shows potential, but the rest of the game isn’t strong enough to lift it up into an experience that any gamer needs to see.

More than any of the technical faults, though, is the problem that Kay is just plain dullsville. [Oct 2005, p.134]

In the right environment and with the right people, Divekick offers some fun. But the lack of online lobbies drastically limits those opportunities. Like most novelties, the fun of Divekick is short-lived.

A bigger focus on action (like fighting wild animals) and a wider variety of activities make this more enjoyable than the original, but it still failed to make me care about the characters enough to suffer alongside them.

As it is, this is no more than a briefly amusing spectacle for fans of the series.

Gigantic is an accessible MOBA that admirably scales the genre down, but loses the magic that makes the genre so enticing. It lacks many of the myriad ability and character interactions that make learning these kinds of games so much fun, and the combat doesn’t find a comfortable center between MOBA and third-person action.

None of these sports are fully fleshed out, and they simply represent a range of motions to perform with the controller.

Unfortunately, a sterile open world and excessive backtracking drain Catalyst of the fun found in the original.

More fun than watching the movie that inspired it. Of course, so is watching your inbred Uncle Eddie pick lint out of his navel. [Feb 2002, p.85]

Gigantic is an accessible MOBA that admirably scales the genre down, but loses the magic that makes the genre so enticing. It lacks many of the myriad ability and character interactions that make learning these kinds of games so much fun, and the combat doesn’t find a comfortable center between MOBA and third-person action.

The action is poorly designed and repetitive, and the quest is void of challenge. [Sept 2003, p.125]

But after spending a mere 30 minutes to complete the adventure, you'll soon discover that there's too little sustenance to provide a satisfying portion of gameplay.[Nov 2002, p.138]

It is a good thing this game only costs $20, because that's exactly what it's worth. [Feb 2004, p.109]

Overall, Re Mind is disappointing. Between all the reused content and very few additions to the story, I felt like I wasted my time. Yes, a few new threads and pieces of info are there to unravel, but they are the tiniest of crumbs. The biggest revelation is in the new secret movie, which shows the series potentially moving in a strange direction that makes me more uneasy than excited. Ultimately, you really have to dig for the fun in Re Mind, because it’s buried in all this content you’ve already played.

Part of GTC's woes is that the textures smell as bad as hot camel breath - even if the tracks themselves are cool. [Sept 2002, p.81]

I'm not saying the game is outdated, I just don't think a new console makes it much more compelling. [June 2002, p.79]

With better action games out there for GBA, I suggest leaving this earthworm to the fisherman. [Sept 2002, p.94]

Fans have been holding their breath for this sequel for 11 years, yet Sega answered their dreams with a game that feels like a Sega Saturn expansion. Only approach this game if you still love playing the original, otherwise your fond memories of this series will likely be tarnished.

Darksiders Genesis fails to take advantage of the series' strengths. Since Darksiders’ inception, fans have imagined what it might be like to team up as the different horsemen. Darksiders Genesis finally offers a co-op experience, but its offbeat design and forgettable story don't deliver on the fantasy.

The AI for your defenders is horrible. Attacking forwards don't have the plague, fellas, just the ball. [May 2004, p.99]

The game's pace is dreadfully slow. [Apr 2003, p.84]

"Quotation Forthcoming"

The Sojourn accomplishes some cool moments, but the space between them is dull, leaving you stranded in a sterile world with a predictable rhythm.

It's clunky, and some stages are just plain dumb. Transworld is just another log to toss on the fire. [Jan 2003, p.114]

Battles in War of the Vikings can be quick and enjoyable, but those flashes of fun aren’t enough to keep the experience interesting.

With so many great co-op experiences available to gamers, it’s tough to recommend The 40th Day. Lacking a cohesive story, solid controls, key multiplayer features, and polish, this sequel fails to close the gap of mediocrity running through its core game design.

The four unlockable modes might keep hardcore fans coming back, but I didn’t find much reason to stick around. Challenge and Arcade modes are rewrapped campaign levels, and the Minigame mode features puzzles you’ve already found the solution to in the campaign.

Goblet of Fire is the best console Harry Potter action game yet, but it's still a far cry from good. [Dec 2005, p.161]

Tenchu also needs a serious upgrade to its enemy AI. It’s hard to imagine that a developer would release a game in this day and age where if you climb up to a rooftop or crawl under a building while an enemy is taking a swing at you, he completely loses track of you. Ninjas deserve better.

Much of the iconic music, sounds, and emotive quality of the classic cartoon are absent here, making the game a fairly standard sci-fi romp with little of the magic it might have had. [Oct 2004, p.128]

While I appreciate the desire to try something new with the game structure after so many titles, the resulting mishmash of ideas is frustrating, repetitive, and unfriendly to both kids and adults.

Fans will probably dig the game’s cool set pieces and the story, but the save points are placed too far apart, many puzzles require too much random experimentation, and the dialogue system seems like an afterthought. [Nov 2008, p.118]

The other half of the Outlaw equation, the humor, left me cold. [Sept 2005, p.100]

Several things work as they should, but much of the game is chock full of frustration, and the whole thing ends up feeling like a string of tired minigames. [Nov 2004, p.170]

Graphics (especially on Xbox) are sharp and colorful, the characters and areas from the movie are represented well, and the licensed songs are far more impressive than most similar fare. [Dec 2004, p.168]

If you’re going to play Lost Planet 3, PC is the way to go. Texture pop-in is nonexistent, graphics and lighting are improved, and load times are reduced. Even though controllers are supported, mouse aiming adds accuracy and dramatically speeds up turns. Anything you can do to make this game feel faster is a huge bonus.

Essentially the video game equivalent of sleeping with your eyes open. [Nov 2004, p.149]

As horrendous as this game may appear to be, I actually found my self somewhat engrossed. [Feb 2002, p.85]

Even with these intriguing traits in place, King's Field: The Ancient City will bore approximately 99.9% of the gamers out there. Primarily because the game is so slow and burdensome. [Apr 2002, p.77]

The gaming landscape has changed a lot since the series heyday, but this title is stuck in a no-man's-land between not being good enough to replicate the past nor ambitious enough to move the franchise forward.

If the passion of soccer leads people to violence, then I would watch out if I were FIFA Street - the game's liable to make some people mad. [Apr 2005, p.120]

A mediocre car combat title. [Sept 2002, p.81]

Out of all of the books, games, and movies, it allows you to get closer to the school than ever before – all at the expense of actually enjoying your stay. It’s boring and tedious, just like a real school is. However, it’s also a place where your Harry Potter knowledge can bloom. On this note, only hardcore Harry Potter nuts should enroll.

While some may argue that Sega Rally fits their bill for arcade racing, I don’t think there’s any forgiving this game for how shallow it is. Apart from unlocking tracks, cars, and paint schemes, it simply offers very little else.

Multiplayer is what’s really going to get the fans riled. After fine-tuning your ideal mech in single player, you can bring it online and face off against anywhere from one to seven opponents. Unfortunately, there’s not a whole lot of match variety outside of deathmatch and team deathmatch, and there’s no respawning so matches don’t last much longer than five minutes tops.

The game's reality, however, constantly reminds you that this isn't the Tony Hawk you remember. Inconsistent framerate, textures that pop in, and physics quirks that launch you into the sky mar the experience regularly.

The game is, for lack of a better term, tired. [Mar 2002, p.89]

Lagging well behind the series’ standards, the Wii remote has a hard time detecting your backswing. Thus, it’s harder to control. There were even times the game putted for me by accident.

Despite the strength of its career mode, it’s too bad AO Tennis 2’s gameplay isn’t more dependable, because the genre has needed a new light for several generations. However, this game can’t muster the consistency needed to be a credible threat.

Magic fans will likely scoff in disgust, but if you're in the market for a game that plays like a fighter but has a little more depth, you may want to give this a whirl. [Dec 2003, p.173]

Combat feels more like a slugfest than an intense tactical experience; not once was I able to recover from bad odds through strategic expertise. [May 2004, p.107]

I did enjoy the escort missions, and the co-op is decent, but they can't hide the fact that 187 is just plain mediocre. [Oct 2005, p.128]

The butchery that Factor 5 has inflicted upon this game has led to a disastrous release that will likely be remembered as one of the biggest disappointments in all of gaming. [Nov 2003, p.155]

These little twists add a fair amount of variety to Dropchord, but the overall package failed to grab me. I loved the soundtrack (you can download it from iTunes), and the visuals are great as well. The backgrounds swirl and change in a funky lightshow that doesn't obscure the objectives. Ultimately, though, it’s a neat-looking (and sounding) game that’s easy to play and just as easy to forget.