For 854 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 40% higher than the average critic
  • 6% same as the average critic
  • 54% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 10.7 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Simon Abrams' Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 55
Highest review score: 100 Viet and Nam
Lowest review score: 0 Zookeeper
Score distribution:
854 movie reviews
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Burial has a hard enough core, both in terms of its central premise and its pulpy tropes, that for about 30 minutes, it almost works as a decent B-movie, right before it unceremoniously falls apart.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    There doesn’t seem to be a romantic-comedy cliché missing from the bland French domestic Back to Burgundy, a wholly contrived post-adolescent coming-of-age yarn.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 80 Simon Abrams
    Veiel’s refreshingly open-ended approach invites you to find your own answers.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Baskin does what many horror films try and fail to do: it makes you feel like you're a passive prisoner/spectator, watching as an especially vivid nightmare unfolds.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Tokyo Tribe, an adaptation of a popular Japanese manga, is bound to charm viewers — both the uninitiated and the diehard fans of director Sion Sono ("Why Don't You Play in Hell," "Love Exposure") — with its boundless energy ... for a while, anyway.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 100 Simon Abrams
    Everything matters in Cronenberg's Cosmopolis, but not everything is necessarily the same as DeLillo's book. And that makes the film, as a series of discussions about inter-related money-minded contradictions, insanely rich and maddeningly complex. We can't wait to rewatch it.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 30 Simon Abrams
    Gibney may encourage viewers to condemn the police, but his self-righteous editorializing doesn’t make up for the lack of convincing evidence.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The first and maybe biggest problem facing viewers when they watch The Spine of Night is its drab and dramatically inert animation style.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Before its typically inoffensive and unmemorable finale, Four Samosas inevitably skids into a self-conscious Anderson parody that even the uninitiated will see coming from miles off.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Unfortunately, The Deer King fatally (and repeatedly) stalls as its plot starts winding down and its creators lunge for a character-driven moral to a symbolically freighted parable.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Sun Choke is, after all, a melodrama, so you have to believe in Hagan's character. All of the impressionistic cinematography and special effects in the world couldn't save the film if you didn't care enough about Hagan's performance.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Believer works best as a series of perpetually escalating confrontations.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    With Nocebo, Finnegan and his collaborators have put their finger on something dark and disturbing. Too bad it’s never as upsetting as it is suggestive.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 60 Simon Abrams
    While it doesn't cohere into anything more substantial than a collection of self-loathing anxieties, Japanese teledrama Penance is effectively unnerving on a scene-for-scene basis thanks to writer/director Kiyoshi Kurosawa's preference for ambience over character-driven drama.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    A prime example of a horror omnibus film: even the weaker segments have something to recommend them.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    Informative but tedious talking-head doc Our Man in Tehran is for anyone who watched Argo and then wished to hear a ditzy, history-obsessed uncle ramble about the real-life political stakes of the 1979 Iranian hostage crisis.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Is it worth seeing? Yes, but only if you enjoy being grossed out.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 0 Simon Abrams
    If Retaliation were a friend, you’d eventually avoid them.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 83 Simon Abrams
    The Lords of Salem is a product of Zombie’s better creative impulses, so it’s ok that it also features several of his worse indulgences, too.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 55 Simon Abrams
    Neither the action scenes nor the musical numbers stand out though, and none of the characters or their performers transcend their expected roles.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Rabbit Trap, a supernatural drama about a young couple haunted by a creepy child, revels in the tropes and tics of a few decades’ worth of British folk horror.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    R100 is, consequently, a comedy that tries to alienate you by suggesting that escapism is futile, all things inevitably devolve, and nothing inherently means anything.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Stone-faced martial-arts star Donnie Yen does a lot with a little in wuxia weepy Ip Man 3, the rare kung fu film whose sentimental dialogue scenes are just as good as its stripped-down action sequences.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 60 Simon Abrams
    The darkly funny American indie drama Small Engine Repair works best when it’s a hangout comedy starring three schlubby New England burnouts.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    The film patly confirms what "The Lion King" already taught '90s kids: we should take comfort in knowing that everything in life is natural when seen as part of the "circle of life," as surprisingly effective voiceover narrator John Krasinski reminds us.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 88 Simon Abrams
    A week after seeing The Wandering Earth, I'm still marveling at how good it is. I can't think of another recent computer-graphics-driven blockbuster that left me feeling this giddy because of its creators' can-do spirit and consummate attention to detail.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    As it is, “Land of Bad” is a pandering drama with some action movie thrills.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 40 Simon Abrams
    Each propulsive segment features a handful of disturbing sequences... But such pleasures barely compensate for the vapidity of V/H/S: Viral's sketches.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Blackout is nothing new, or even essential, but it mostly works anyway thanks to Fessenden and his cast’s impressive collaboration.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 50 Simon Abrams
    In theory, that sort of self-victimization could be funny; in this reality, not so much.

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