Simon Abrams
Select another critic »For 854 reviews, this critic has graded:
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40% higher than the average critic
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6% same as the average critic
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54% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 10.7 points lower than other critics.
(0-100 point scale)
Simon Abrams' Scores
- Movies
- TV
| Average review score: | 55 | |
|---|---|---|
| Highest review score: | Viet and Nam | |
| Lowest review score: | Zookeeper | |
Score distribution:
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Positive: 390 out of 854
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Mixed: 239 out of 854
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Negative: 225 out of 854
854
movie
reviews
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- Simon Abrams
It takes a moment for the action to start—about 38 minutes—but once it does, this otherwise generic thriller’s flimsy relevance and unusual pacing not only seem more forgivable but maybe even sneakily clever.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 13, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
American Made may be superficially a condemnation of the hypocritical American impulse to take drug suppliers' money with one hand and chastise users with the other. But it's mostly a sensational, sub-"Wolf of Wall Street"-style true crime story that attempts to seduce you, then abandon you.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 28, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
A visually impressive mix of hand-drawn and CGI animation with basic action-adventure elements that are always viscerally satisfying thanks to Hosoda's apparent warts-and-all love for humanity.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 4, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
The scattershot new media satire Vengeance might have been merely a toothless provocation replete with both-sides false equivalences were it not so well-scripted and well-directed on a scene-to-scene basis.- TheWrap
- Posted Jun 13, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
If you want to see cats chasing people in packs, falling over themselves to descend stairwells, and jump up trees to swipe at disposable human protagonists--you will probably enjoy Roar.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 17, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Unexpected isn't about, but rather a product of, class-based condescension in America.- Village Voice
- Posted Jul 21, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
While this new “Dragon Ball” spinoff may not be all things to all viewers, it’s also a thrilling showcase for Toriyama’s beloved characters.- TheWrap
- Posted Aug 10, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Canadian filmmaker Denis Côté holds up a shallow mirror to the world of bodybuilding in the underwhelming experimental documentary A Skin So Soft.- Village Voice
- Posted Jul 5, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Unlike most costume dramas, Sunset — a moving Hungarian character study set in Budapest during 1913 — isn't a movie you can easily get lost in. The movie's disorienting and visually austere style takes some getting used to.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 22, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Recreated footage of the rovers flying to, landing on, and carefully exploring the red planet tend to be the most engrossing material in White’s scattershot documentary, which too often tries to humanize the rovers’ handlers by playing up their emotions instead of their accomplishments.- TheWrap
- Posted Sep 17, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
It’s “Avatar” meets “Fantastic Voyage,” and it also looks really good on a big screen thanks to Disney’s many, many talented animators. With their help, “Strange World” breezes through a checklist of formulaic plot points and canned emotional revelations with enough style and sensitivity to make it work.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 23, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Any movie is improved at least 10 percent by the presence of Scottish actor Brian Cox, even mushy sports drama Believe.- Village Voice
- Posted Sep 9, 2014
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- Simon Abrams
Derrickson and Cargill successfully tailor their focused and mostly compelling narrative to a Steven Spielberg/Amblin Entertainment–esque bit of Stephen King–sploitation.- TheWrap
- Posted Jun 20, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Yen continues charging ahead in “The Prosecutor,” which frequently goes hard enough to fly through its corniest lulls.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 10, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
The brutality of Tyrannosaur isn't so over the top as to make director Paddy Considine's sympathy for his flawed characters look like a sham. But it does frequently bring his film's seesawing exploration of blue-collar existence to the brink of collapse.- Slant Magazine
- Posted Nov 13, 2011
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- Simon Abrams
Ride Your Wave moves without a great sense of urgency, but only because Hinako’s emotional turmoil isn’t a great conflict or a tragedy. It is, however, as real as the private heartaches that we self-consciously wear on our sleeves.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 19, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
The Hallow also de-emphasizes human drama to the point where it often feels like a Jenga tower of set pieces, a disappointing fact that's most apparent during the film's first 40 minutes.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 6, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
If you’re watching Leo, it should be to see Vijay show off in between animal attacks, car flips, and celebrity cameos. And even if you don’t expect much from Leo, it still might give you exactly what you need.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 20, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
Point and Shoot consequently feels like a film made by a storyteller — not a journalist — who doesn't know he can ask follow-up questions.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 31, 2014
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- Simon Abrams
Instead of relishing the specific details of this story, you wind up enjoying its familiar pleasures and then maybe its creators’ proficient execution.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 27, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
Assassination is a blast whenever the director doesn't take his melodramatic plot too seriously.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 4, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Director Joshua Erkman shows promise throughout “A Desert,” his first feature, but his movie’s unyielding scenario, co-written with Bossi Baker, makes it hard to want to hang around while thinly drawn characters vaguely establish the movie’s themes.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 2, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
And when the movie’s over, nothing is resolved that the filmmakers didn’t side-step or reduce to a few unconvincing symbols of hope for a more equitable future. You might like Enforcement if that’s a line you already want to buy; there’s otherwise not much here to change your mind.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 19, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
An average scene in Confess, Fletch features several different kinds of humor, including callbacks, running jokes, physical comedy, and character-driven wordplay, all of which either flatter the individual actors or show off how well they work with their co-stars.- TheWrap
- Posted Sep 14, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Meet Me in the Bathroom is an impressionistic blur, more about what it felt like to be at the head of a scene than the actual scene’s character or identity.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 4, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Aat some point, every character in Youth falls out of love with the way of seeing the world. That kind of anti-epiphany is major—not on a universal, but rather a personal scale.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 4, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
It's an unsettling, and sometimes high-concept doodle, but it's awfully hard to resist a film that marries Atomic Age paranoia and optimism with Kurosawa's signature post-modern, atmosphere-intensive style.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 2, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Vivarium isn’t a fun watch, and not just because it’s generally claustrophobic and insistently bleak.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 27, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
What’s mostly lacking is a matter of character-enhancing detail, the kind that would better integrate the movie’s high-concept thrills with its heartstring-tugging melodrama. Soapy’s not bad, but “This is Not a Test” lacks the sensationalism or sensitivity to make it more than a wan misfire.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 20, 2026
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- Simon Abrams
Thankfully, there's a considerable nasty streak that runs throughout Furies, and it isn't limited to the movie's antagonists.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 23, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
Thankfully, Studio 4°C’s sumptuous animation and sound design still make “All You Need is Kill” a vivid and worthwhile do-over.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 16, 2026
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- Simon Abrams
In many ways, Zhang’s latest is the coldest film that he’s made in a while, though it might also be his most alluring.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 30, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
There's a lot of chutzpah on display throughout the film, even during essentially soggy, dialogue-intensive sequences, which are broken up by disorienting flashbacks. But Jung's biggest failing is his inability to make Sook-hee a heroine worth caring about.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 25, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
Call Me Lucky is a loving but fair portrait of the artist as a heroic hothead.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 4, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
The film's nature as a work of propaganda would be more deplorable—or at least eyeroll-inducing—if it weren't so poorly blocked, scripted, performed, and choreographed. There is no joy in Seagal-ville, dear rubber-neckers, because pretty much everybody here has struck out.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jun 16, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
The sprawling scope of The Traitor is a big part of its dryly funny (though never in a ha-ha kind of way) appeal, and that takes some getting used to.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 31, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
Die-hard X Japan fans may enjoy seeing Yoshiki talk about his past, but everyone else will leave We Are X wondering who X Japan is.- Village Voice
- Posted Nov 2, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Winningly over-the-top Korean gangster drama Asura: The City of Madness is what you'd get if you combined The Wire with a really good soap opera.- Village Voice
- Posted Oct 13, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Okazaki gets close to, but never sheds enough light on, Mifune's elusive personality.- Village Voice
- Posted Nov 23, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Monster Hunt 2 is charming enough on a scene-to-scene basis that its success is worth noting.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 22, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Bloodthirsty isn’t as deep or dark as it needs to be, and that’s way more frustrating than its general lack of werewolves.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 23, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
Cocker's magnetic persona is a huge part of Pulp's identity, but it's not the band's greatest legacy. So don't be surprised when Cocker's gas-leak hiss of a voice is drowned out by smoke machine cannons, and fails to swell until it bursts at the end of "Common People."- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 20, 2014
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- Simon Abrams
A strong ensemble cast, led by Sterling K. Brown and Regina Hall, does a lot of emotional heavy lifting in the otherwise lightweight mockumentary Honk for Jesus. Save Your Soul.- TheWrap
- Posted Jan 26, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Piercing, the latest horror film by music video helmer turned feature horror writer/director Nicolas Pesce, is more frustrating than it is actually bad. Because Piercing, an adaptation of Ryu Murakami's novel of the same name, succeeds as a darkly comic provocation. I think. Sort of?- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 1, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
By inexpertly filtering her art through her travails, Wood and Altunaga reimagine Parra's suicide as an explicable conclusion to her turbulent life.- Village Voice
- Posted Mar 26, 2013
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- Simon Abrams
Without Charlize Theron, the spy adventure Atomic Blonde would only be clever. She makes it insightful. The actress gives emotional depth to the highly mannered behavior of the film’s heroine.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jul 26, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
Arthouse horror flick The Eyes of My Mother actively alienates viewers by presenting episodes in a woman's life from a post-human, God-like perspective. Sometimes. Usually. Probably?- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 2, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Knock at the Cabin does not disappoint. It’s a movie that reminds us why Shyamalan is one of contemporary cinema’s greatest alchemists and a prime example of a filmmaker at his best and boldest.- The Playlist
- Posted Feb 1, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
Pattinson and Wasikowska deserve better material than the Zellners’ head-scratchingly lazy jokes.- Village Voice
- Posted Jun 21, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
The Limehouse Golem only reflects its creators' lack of imagination. Medina and Goldman invest so much time in (poorly) misleading audiences that they say nothing memorable about the past, or why it matters to today's audience.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 8, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
With Bullet Train Explosion, you get a straight-down-the-line crowdpleaser, replete with duty-bound authority figures in well-pressed uniforms, anxious and often self-absorbed passengers, Macgyver-like problem-solving, seat-of-your-pants close calls, that sort of thing. There are no real surprises here, just what you’d want from this sort of cheeseball entertainment.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 23, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
I wanted to root for and care about the world of “Night Raiders,” but I never felt like Niska and her daughter said more about themselves than their predictable behavior advertised.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 12, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
In this context, Farnworth’s appropriately broad performance is exceptional. She doesn’t have much dialogue that’s worthy of her playful, all-in line readings, but Farnworth deserves all due praise.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 2, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
If nothing else, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reminds us that nostalgia is often used as a mandate for spectacularly lazy filmmaking.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 8, 2014
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- Simon Abrams
Documentary character study Kung Fu Elliot starts off as a cringe-humor portrait of a delusional would-be action star, but gradually transforms into a thoughtful examination of its title character's naïveté.- Village Voice
- Posted Feb 24, 2015
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- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 1, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
I’d have an easier time accepting the trite, asked-and-answered conclusions that director Muye Wen and co-writers Jianu Han and Wei Zhong lead viewers to if they were more adept at tugging at viewers’ heart-strings.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 9, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Fighter never strays far from the path that other movies like it have previously charted, but it still delivers most of what it promises.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 30, 2024
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- Simon Abrams
There aren’t many surprises here, because the bread crumbs that lead to the movie’s big finish are plentiful and very stale. Seriously, the plot twists in this movie are so obvious and unappetizing that you couldn’t miss them if you tried.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jul 10, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
A very good film, but only if you're willing to inevitably submit to its anarchic sensibility.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 9, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
The sturdy but shallow martial arts melodrama Ip Man 4: The Finale isn’t much more than what fans have already gotten from the popular action franchise.- TheWrap
- Posted Dec 23, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
An arty tribute to violent, sensuous, over-the-top Euro-trash pulp fiction.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 31, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
While some talking points tend to be belabored and others don’t get unpacked at great enough length, Lynch/Oz still offers movie-lovers a variety of thoughtful and dynamic new ways of seeing Lynch’s work.- TheWrap
- Posted Oct 10, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
A crashing disappointment, even if you haven't seen director Masaaki Yuasa's relatively inspired and completely unpredictable 2004 anti-coming-of-age fantasy "Mind Game."- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 11, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
It's also genuinely warm and involving because of the participation of everyone from Carmen Vega, Giger's widow, to Sandra Berretta, Giger's former assistant and self-described "life partner." The film is, in that sense, an effective memorial, one filmed after Giger himself admitted that he had said all he wanted to say in his art.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 15, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Coogan and Rudd's generally charming performances both give weight to their otherwise wisp-thin characters, but their swishy mannerisms also speak to the superficial nature of Fleming's presentation of Erasmus and Paul.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jun 29, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
It’s not badly made, just uninspired and played out. If you like B-movies made with a budget and are specifically looking for an undemanding time, “Abigail” might be for you. “Abigail” might also disappoint you, especially if you’re hoping for more than what’s advertised.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 7, 2024
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- Simon Abrams
More about ambience than narrative progress, so if you don't like these kinds of characters (ie: hippy-dippy aesthetes), the film will drive you up a wall.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 20, 2013
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- Simon Abrams
Rarely goes so far over the top that it loses you completely. It is, to put it mildly, not subtle. But if you watch it expecting to see a dumb idea executed with appreciable skill, you'll have a blast.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 4, 2013
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- Simon Abrams
Had Nicholson taken advantage of Melendez and Suarez's seemingly easy-going nature, Rubble Kings might have been great. As it is, the film is a one-sided, but satisfying tribute to an alternatively terrifying and beguiling city that we can only revisit in movies.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jun 19, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Paley's segment proves that The Prophet is more of a missed opportunity than an ambitious folly.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 4, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Blood-soaked Indonesian martial arts flick Headshot is for anyone who liked "The Bourne Identity," but wished it were way more violent.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 3, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
Neophyte writer/director Christopher Papakaliatis eventually shows an affinity for filming two people in love, but his actors often lack the chemistry to make us believe that their bond transcends all socioeconomic boundaries.- Village Voice
- Posted Jan 11, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
The director's gifted collaborators sometimes perk up this listless parable, but never enough to sell its second-hand fatalism.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 2, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
Hadžihalilović's latest is both too hazy to make a great adaptation and too focused to be genuinely dream-like.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jul 15, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
The Bluff exemplifies a very enjoyable type of nostalgia-bait, even if it’s never as good as its elevator pitch.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 25, 2026
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- Simon Abrams
The best thing I can say about Daniel Isn’t Real is that it’s a promising early feature made by young artists who haven’t yet worked out how to express and/or synthesize what they like about their favorite artists and their work. It’s all style and very little substance.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 6, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Unfortunately, Archambault’s churlishly over-the-top performance makes it impossible to take 14 Cameras seriously, no matter how you interpret Gerald’s actions.- Village Voice
- Posted Jul 25, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
The camera loves Channing Tatum, and that makes up for a lot in Dog, a corny road movie that mostly panders to fans of Tatum and/or dogs, as well as any moviegoer who still thinks that making a big show of supporting the troops (any troops) makes them more human than, uh, most everyone else.- TheWrap
- Posted Feb 17, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Thank You for Playing transforms a father's confession into a revealing work of art.- Village Voice
- Posted Mar 17, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
There are no good or bad people in The Island, just a group of hapless schmucks who become more sympathetic as they get more desperate.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 9, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Unlike “Stranger Things,” The Wretched is a little too cute about teen angst, and not light enough on its feet to make you want to root for its ostensibly typical adolescent.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 1, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
Hokey and unconvincing, “Tetris” skims the surface of a genuinely curious “true story” thriller, which too often plays out like a Disney-ified version of “The Social Network.”- TheWrap
- Posted Mar 15, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
The cleverest additions to the “Hellraiser” canon will only be apparent to established fans since the makers of the latest movie awkwardly graft a sometimes-inspired monster movie onto the back of a trauma-focused character study.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 7, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
The Taking of Tiger Mountain may not always be as grand as it should be, but its thrills compensate for its shortcomings.- Village Voice
- Posted Dec 30, 2014
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- Simon Abrams
Shooting the Mafia is, if nothing else, a decent introduction to Battaglia’s work, even if the rest of Loginotto’s primer doesn’t tell us much about who Battaglia is, or how to appreciate what she does.- TheWrap
- Posted Nov 22, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Both an overstimulated multimedia lecture and an anxiety-stoking conspiracy thriller, “The Grab” urges viewers to follow the money, look at the big picture, and so on.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jun 14, 2024
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- Simon Abrams
The equally thrilling and exhausting Hong Kong martial arts fantasy Detective Dee: The Four Heavenly Kings boasts more inventive weapons, monsters, and plot twists than most Western audiences will know what to do with.- Village Voice
- Posted Jul 26, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
This movie doesn’t work well as an edifying documentary, but it might go over well with anyone who wants to follow its unconvincing conspiracy-theory-like logic (apparently, genetic research is bad because it's "playing God" and is partly underfunded and overseen by the Chinese government and cocky American scientists!).- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 2, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
The film is, in that sense, the ultimate fan film since it monotonously aggregates previously existing scifi/fantasy tropes. Rejoice, Gen X viewers, for now you can uncritically enjoy your childhood's junk food culture just because you're looking at the past through the rose-colored lenses of the future.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 28, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Claire's Camera is, like many of Hong's best comedies before it, amusing without necessarily being laugh-out-loud funny.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 9, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
There’s a significant difference in quality between the mediocre scenario (and dialogue) and thrilling production design (and direction) in White Snake.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 27, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
This is a film noir that is, despite some jittery, Tony Scott-esque action sequences, so cool, that you will leave it begging for a sequel.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jul 31, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Realistically, Overlord is a simple mechanism to deliver squib packs and swear words, a function that the film's creators accomplish despite their otherwise unremarkable story's choppy pacing and general humorlessness.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 9, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
While the first hour of “New Gods: Yang Jian” is about as attractive as it is surreal, the back half only works if you care about the destinies of its undistinguished protagonists.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 20, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
The Nowhere Inn . . . is a collection of comedic and musical sketches that are not funny, weird or thoughtful enough to sell its creators’ insistent, but mostly trite and undeveloped, ideas about the performative nature of self-fashioning and creative authenticity.- TheWrap
- Posted Feb 1, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
Imagine a cross between "Annie" and "Jesus Christ Superstar," only with more speed metal. Now imagine a lot of long takes of sometimes merely adequate, sometimes sneakily brilliant performers doing simple dance steps or sing-talking reams of theatrical dialogue (adapted from Charles Peguy's religious mystery play).- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 13, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Maslany and Cullen's characters seem intended to be psychologically realistic, but they're only as complex as The Other Half's surface-deep style.- Village Voice
- Posted Mar 9, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
But all the charm in the world wouldn't make Ra.One's sanctimoniousness seem any more genuine.- Slant Magazine
- Posted Oct 29, 2011
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- Simon Abrams
The heroes of this film are, in other words, selfish, but never in a venal, or ugly way. They're human, and they do what they must to face each successive challenge they're confronted with.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 4, 2017
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