Like a train wreck - can't help but look. [Aug 2007, p.103]

The gaming equivalent of a massage, so unchallenging that your mind can rest up, recharge, and be in good mental health. [June 2008, p.73]

An average party game regurgitation. Not at this price. [Oct 2012, p.101]

Naughty bore more like. Yeah. [Sept 2010, p.88]

The idea of Deadfall, as a genuine raid on a legitimate tomb harks back to a fondly remembered era of Lara Croft. Losing Croft's platforming for a heavier puzzle element could have been great. Unfortunately, Deadfall Adventures fails to satisfy on either of the two goals it sets itself. The gunplay is juddering and weak, and the puzzles lack depth and satisfaction. Even a cabal of supernatural Nazis can't save this one.

Nobody in their right mind should buy this.

Venetica is a neat idea for an RPG hamstrung by an engine that can't do the maths quick enough and some terrible production values.

The unkindest cut of all is that you only rarely get to actually command the Enterprise, and when you do, the implementation would disgrace the average Call of Duty turret sequence.

An idiotic, stupidly playable romp from beginning to end, with such baffling diversions you can't help but love it. [April 2006, p.72]

A boring, brain-dead waste of time. [Oct 2009, p.82]

Your moves are clumsy, and unresponsive. Arenas wear you out, rather than challenge you. Boss battles are overwrought and underwhelming. The God at the climax of the Land of the Dead is defeated by a drawn-out process of ranged health-whittling and dodge-rolling.

It's impossible to overcome the tedium after the first few hours. [July 2010, p.103]

"Quotation Forthcoming"

The game's ultimate wrong turning is that it looks and plays like something released several years ago. [May 2008, p.88]

A stealth game with frustrating AI, horrible controls, and game-breaking bugs.

It's an error to think of Fatal Conspiracy as a game. That creates an expectation of fun - a level on which CSI doesn't try to deliver. [Issue#67, p.103]

Not too substantial, but surprisingly polished. [Apr 2009, p.91]

Nothing but a cynical movie cash-grab. [July 2010, p.99]

Nowhere near clever enough to bother with. [Dec 2008, p.100]

A tired sports game with wasted potential. [Dec 2007, p.109]

Its shear randomness and awfulness is a remarkable sight. Take it from us that its not a spectacle you need to witness first hand, nor have staining your Gamertag forever more.

A by-the-numbers budget shooter with very little in the way of spark. Not a total stinker, but hardly worth your cash either. [June 2006, p.69]

Why punish yourself? [Sept 2012, p.105]

A sub-par game that hasn't aged well. [Sept 2010, p.103]

One of the worst examples of this genre. [Mar 2010, p.115]

Way of the Dogg is a squandered opportunity to fill a genre gap in the Arcade. It's a quick hour's job to mop up 300G, though. So there's always that.

Truly "sub"-standard. [Aug 2010, p.105]

If you're a fan of Prison Break, why not consider assaulting some strangers and being sent to a real prison? You'll end up feeling marginally less violated than if you played this dog turd tie-in.