After a few hours with Made Man, you'll be begging for someone to put two in the back of your head.

The game's title may not provide justification for exploring the dungeon, but the much bigger I DON'T KNOW here is why anyone would play this game.

Emergency Mayhem is an example of how not to make a minigame collection.

A long-in-development shooter from Germany that--despite occasional bursts of endearing "deepest depths of your soul" wackiness--is ruined by sloppy design, bugs, and a desperate need for some editing.

ShellShock 2: Blood Trails spices up Vietnam with a liberal application of zombies, but it does nothing to liven up the generic shooter gameplay.

Underground Pool is a squalid representation of the game of billiards.

Freedom's total lack of action is complemented by a complete absence of adventure, leaving only bland graphics and a general sense of tedium to fill the giant void that exists between installing the game and finishing it.

By evening out the presentation and focusing the story, New Vision transforms the Eureka Seven series from painful to playable.

This simplistic brawler's condescending attitude and one-note gameplay make it worth dodging.

There's a pervasive plainness to Escape Dead Island that hasn’t been common since the PlayStation 2 days.

You won't want to come out to play with this clunky beat-'em-up.

In practice, however, the game's ugly textures, poor frame rate, and clunky gameplay combine to make MTV Skateboarding one of the worst PlayStation games released this year.

Up to 16 people can play online, and there are several different modes of play. While this might sound like a pretty good deal, the unbalanced shooting mechanics and mostly lousy maps pretty much do away with that notion right away.

Mamodo Fury packs a number of gameplay modes and plenty of familiar characters, but it all feels wasted on this shallow and frustrating fighting game.

The shooting interface is unreliable and tough to get the hang of, which is unfortunate considering that Dead to Rights is supposedly an action game steeped in gunplay.

This stealth game takes all the fun out of life in prison.

If nothing else, this game should serve as a fine example of what not to do when developing a street sports game, and if it serves this purpose well, hopefully no one will ever have to endure another urban-themed train wreck like Freestyle Street Soccer.

There's virtually nothing to the game that suggests that any real effort or care went into Taiketsu's creation, and every facet of its execution--the sound, the graphics, the combat--feels unfinished.

The Golden Compass is just another family-friendly film cash-in with few redeeming qualities.

Rebel Raiders takes dull, mindless air combat action into the danger zone.

It somehow even manages to make the Unreal engine look a pop-in-fest full of awful repetitive textures and jaggies worthy of the original PlayStation. There's no place in the world for a lemon of this magnitude.

A novel idea, but in the end, it doesn't have enough variation to make it worthwhile. This one is only for the hard-core WCW fan.

With deeply flawed motion controls and a number of other issues, MotionSports fumbles all its potential.

Dull, repetitive, and carelessly programmed don't even begin to sum up how crummy this action game based on the Looney Tunes license is.

Soldier Elite wants very badly to be a stealth action game, but it lacks any understanding of the subtlety and nuance that are essential to the genre.

Deep Black: Reloaded squanders its potential on broken cover-based shooting sequences.

Short, unremarkable, and overpriced, Battle: Los Angeles is a shooter to be avoided.

A haphazard collection of obtuse puzzles strewn about an ill-lighted world that does nothing to call attention to them. While it might be easy to assume these frustrations echo the protagonist's apparent mental illness, PolyPusher Studios utterly fails to teach you about the limits and goals of its own work, and does little to illuminate how its puzzles relate to the real-world experience Montague's Mount tries to evoke.

The console releases are better than the truly execrable PC game of the same name, but there's still no reason for it to exist.

It's an idea that has been tried before and done better.

The Cursed Crusade is a repetitive hack-and-slash that is marred by clumsy combat, poor dialogue, and some serious technical issues.

In a genre that has withstood its share of inferior games over the years, it's true that Mayday probably isn't the worst real-time strategy game to date. But that's the best thing to be said for it.

The solid roots of a charming series are buried under an avalanche of bugs and other issues.

It's not as if the Olympics, be it summer or winter, has had anything special to call its own when it comes to video game adaptations over the years, but Torino 2006 is especially egregious in that it pares down the number of included events to a fairly measly number, manages to make every single one of them completely uninteresting, and skimps entirely on the presentation.

Every aspect of the game is categorically bad; the story is tough to follow, the graphics are lousy, and the gameplay is so contrived and repetitive that it's unlikely anyone will garner much enjoyment from the game, no matter how low their standards are for being entertained.

Another key difference between Green Rogue and other games in the genre is the CONSTANT scrolling of the levels, which can be annoying.

25 to Life is a lifelessly generic shooter that, at times, feels like "Max Payne" without the fun.

Fans of sluggish frame rates and clichéd combat racers pay attention: Pocket Racers is the game for you.

The Eternity Clock is a simple platformer rife with tacky bugs, abrasive puzzles, and timey-wimey guff.

Stripped-down controls with little punishment for crashing make Wacky Races an extremely boring racer.

An ugly collection of poorly conceived minigames, The Polar Express is a failure by the standards of any medium.

This factory comes off more like a real industrial complex than the fantastic playground of a fop who makes candy with magical midgets.

A lifelessly generic shooter that, at times, feels like "Max Payne" without the fun.

Even by 2003 standards, Airborne Troops is an extremely uninspired shooter that borrows endlessly from other World War II games, yet still manages to get almost nothing right. Thus, by 2005 standards, Airborne Troops is a wholly poor effort.

Max'd gets the basic mechanics right, but it's marred by game-stopping bugs and a generally sloppy execution.

If you want a good rhythm game, look elsewhere. And if you want American Idol, just go watch the show.

Its one redeeming feature is that five percent of the game's proceeds will be donated to the Special Operations Warrior Foundation. But you may as well cut out the middleman and just give all $20 to charity.

Flushed Away is a generic run-and-jump game that's hampered by technical problems.

Cheap shocks and poor controls await unsuspecting victims in this outdated horror game.

Absolutely awful in every way.

Buggy behavior and clunky locomotion make it a mechanical failure, leaving the story and themes to make good where gameplay could not. Alas, irredeemable characters and loathsome dialogue aren't appropriate pillars upon which to erect a substantial tale.

Raven Squad is 90 percent first-person shooter, 10 percent strategy game, and 100 percent bad.

Anacapri has more in common with the ancient gameplay of early '90s adventures than anything modern, but even as a pseudo-nostalgia piece, it's no fun at all.

So what reason is there to play Onechanbara: Bikini Samurai Squad? There is none, so suppress any morbid interest you may harbor and spend your money elsewhere, because neither acrobatic temptresses nor legions of the lurching undead can make this game worth playing.

This derivative kart racer is no fun for the entire family.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor has all the right elements, yet it still manages to do everything wrong.

Even if you manage to achieve a stable experience, MindsEye still commits the cardinal sin of being mind-numbingly boring. More than anything, it feels like a game firmly trapped in the past. It wouldn't have been good 15 years ago, either, but perhaps some of its design choices would have made more sense. As it is, issues like broken AI and uneven car physics simply exacerbate the problems with its archaic and insipid design. Impressive visuals can't compensate for a lack of substance, whether that comes from its pointless world, tedious combat, or any number of other egregious shortcomings. If you're looking for quality, cast your mind's eye elsewhere.

RES tries its best to be a fusion of two drastically different genres, and it unfortunately limits itself with difficult control and tedious gameplay.

Too frustrating and convoluted for kids to have any fun with it, and all but the most desperate adult GameCube fans will find it tedious and unentertaining as well.

The soundtrack in THPS5 is good enough, but the game is riddled with technical glitches and design missteps, making it a huge step back for the series.

Most of the minigames are lame and the touch-screen controls rarely work like they should.

With more time and potentially more resources, this could have been an exciting and enjoyable experience with the power to stand on its own, independent of the film. As it is, its pleasures rust away long before it finally gets moving.

An unplayable, buggy mess.

Shoddy controls, buggy gameplay, and some of the worst character design we've seen this year, resulting in a game that can't even justify its $15 price tag.

The racing is pathetically underwhelming, the crashes are so painfully halfhearted that they might as well not even exist, and a wide variety of graphical glitches and collision problems turn the whole thing into a serious mess.

Bland presentation and sloppy mechanics sink Battleship more effectively than a torpedo ever could.

Painkiller: Resurrection is a buggy trip into hell.

Its systems are either unreliable or illogical, and as a result, it feels almost impossible to get a foothold. The first time an enemy kills you when they should have been dead, you may shrug it off. When it happens the dozenth time, you'll probably wonder why you're playing Umbrella Corps at all. There's ultimately no good excuse.

G.I. Combat's biggest shortcoming is that it has very little gameplay. Instead, it has a heap of confusion.

You can accelerate up to 200mph within seconds and survive a brutal wall impact, but a low-speed scuff on the turf sends your car spinning.

No amount of Xzibit influence or ride pimpage can save Pimp My Ride from its god-awful minigames and lousy driving mechanics.

Unleashed is the worst thing to happen to Godzilla since getting killed by Mothra's babies.

It's not zombies you need worry about in the painfully dull The Walking Dead: Survival Instinct.

Game-breaking glitches and a poor camera make TMNT: Out of the Shadows a bruised and battered shell of what it could have been.

Shallow combat, frustrating exploration, and crippling technical issues make Dragon Blade Chronicles a Naruto adventure to avoid.

Fanged killing machines and clunky level design make this vampiric sneaker a real pain in the neck.

Absolutely awful in every way.

Poor controls and a ton of pointless gimmicks make for one frustrating round of Astroturf golf.

The Xbox version yields mixed results: It makes numerous improvements but it also takes away some of the freedom offered in the PC version.

Raven Squad is 90 percent first-person shooter, 10 percent strategy game, and 100 percent bad.

A disaster in just about every imaginable fashion. A few patches may yet round it into some kind of playable shape, but right now this is simply another cookie-cutter RTS loaded with serious bugs and unfulfilled potential.

Who knew that samurai swordfighting could ever be so dull and annoying?

The game itself is executed poorly enough that neither fans of the cartoon nor fans of action sports games will want to have anything to do with it.

If Rock Revolution came out two or three years ago, it might have been revolutionary, but in 2008, it's not even relevant. Uninspired presentation, a tiny tracklist that includes no master tracks, a complete lack of vocal support, uninteresting gameplay, and a barebones Career mode are just a few of the many ways in with Rock Revolution fails.

Whether you're a fan of the cartoon or a fan of fighting games, Legend of the Dragon is a total disappointment.

The bottom line with Deep Raider is that you should avoid it at all costs.

Feels like a rushed hack-job of a game, with just barely enough cohesive action to keep it from completely falling apart at the seams.

While the third-person shooter aspect of Harry's latest adventure can be fun, the game's story elements fail to live up to those of its literary namesake.

Dull, repetitive, and carelessly programmed don't even begin to sum up how crummy this action game based on the Looney Tunes license is.

Hello Neighbor is a game you persevere in due to sheer luck rather than any sort of actual skill, foresight, or cleverness. There's no catharsis, insight, or revelations waiting at the end of the ordeal, just a sort of uneasy malaise over what the images and environments near the end are meant to represent. As such, a simple, appealing concept is rendered inert.

If you're a hard-core video game wrestling fan with a cadre of game systems, there are better choices.

Nobody has enough faith to endure a game with such a hokey story, terrible mission design, serious problems with the interface and graphics, and loads of crippling bugs.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor has all the right elements, yet it still manages to do everything wrong.

The controls are far too imprecise, the collision detection is spotty, and the missions can get a little too monotonous.

The game itself, largely due to control issues, is very, very bad.

Steel Battalion is riddled with erratic flaws of the most insidious kind, the kind that make you think you have a chance to master them. You don't. You can only endure them, and on a handful of levels, endure them with some friends in limp online co-op. But Steel Battalion is still miserable, even with company, so unless you're a glutton for punishment, it just isn't worth it.

Godzilla commits so many game design sins that they become impossible to count, but the greatest horror of them all is that such giant monsters could be so boring.

One of the games included with Bubble Bobble Revolution is a genuine classic. The other is so plagued with glitches that it can't even be finished.