I almost hate to say it but it's the perfect girlfriend game. You can worry about cross training later but she's got to learn how to shoot at some point. And you're going to need buttons sewn on stuff. You'll want her by your side when the end comes.

Like the two aging men at its center, Kane & Lynch is a game full of regrets and missed opportunities. But also like those two men, it’s still got plenty of bullets left in the clip.

I can respect Funimation’s attempt to change many staid fighting game conventions throughout their Dragon Ball Z Budokai Tenkaichi series, but in the process, the controls have become almost impossible to learn.

An awful, bland "story."

Base runs and bosses aside, Contra 4 is the most punishing game on the DS, but also one of the most satisfying. There is no room for error, nor are there any cheap shots. If you die, you screwed up. If you survive, you are officially hard to the titanium core.

The third dimension's grip on the genre may be unshakable, but there are times when special games come along that can ease the transition. The King of Fighters XI is one such game.

If you've got the right family structure, it would make a decent addition to your Wii collection. Otherwise, you'll need a caring and patient older sibling who is willing to dumb themselves down during gameplay for the greater good. How likely is that?

An FPS aimed at the lowest common denominator of players. It’s as though this game was precisely calculated to meet the exact average of gameplay.

The real problem with the game is that it’s too light on everything. Too light on action. Too light on excitement. Too light on story. And too light on gameplay. There’s no need to be subtle in a great hack-n-slash game since you need something to make the game worth playing. But you won’t even find mindless action here, only a brain-dead game.

The real problem with the game is that it’s too light on everything. Too light on action. Too light on excitement. Too light on story. And too light on gameplay. There’s no need to be subtle in a great hack-n-slash game since you need something to make the game worth playing. But you won’t even find mindless action here, only a brain-dead game.

The hand-holding map, health boosts, and high-powered arsenal sap the fun out of what could have been a decent third-person shooter.

The essential problem with Soldier of Fortune: Payback is that it tries very hard to appear realistic while trotting out silly gameplay mechanisms. It’s hard to tell if it’s a serious shooter covering the military side of contemporary politics, or a parody.

It’s got megatons of style, inventiveness, playability and replayability…and all the while, it still manages to feel like sunshine, candy and the glory days of 3D console videogaming yore.

Five to six hours in and Blacksite curls up and expires, ending mercifully an experience that not even an alien would care to dissect.

Ultimate Mortal Kombat is the real deal, and it’s mind-blowing to think that I can not only play it at home, like I used to daydream about, but it fits snugly right in my pocket.

A solid single-player experience… and if you happen to have three History Channel-watching friends who have also purchased this particular odd-bird World War II strategy title, you’re set for what passes for a wild war gamer’s Samstag Nacht.

That all of this has been accomplished on the PSP by a little-known developer with a rejected project is a stupendous surprise.

It captures neither the balance needed to make squad-based strategy work, nor the thrill of decimating troops single-handedly. If you’re a fledgling warrior, firmly take your sword and four-hundred kill count somewhere else.

I was also a little disappointed that the game didn’t take more advantage of the DS capabilities. For one thing, it barely utilizes the stylus and touch-screen, forcing you to work through the game the old-fashioned way by pushing buttons.

Honestly, if the game didn't try to make you hate it, it would be perfectly tolerable, maybe even enjoyable.

Forged Alliance's AI is improved and now more aggressive. It also tends to attack with a stronger mix of units than previously, exposing fewer weaknesses.

Unfortunately, Tactical Strike's story isn't that immersive.

A good import of a mediocre board game, Lights, Camera, Action! is worth a look for fans of the original game or others who are looking for a new game night experience.

Like a near-death experience, bad games can provide us with a vision of the other side, a gamer’s hell filled with E.T. games and 3DOs. A bad game serves to reminds us why good games are so good, and they cleanse the palette and bring us back to the zero-point of solid game development. If you haven’t guessed already, Aqua Teen Hunger Force: Zombie Ninja Pro-Am is one of those terrible, terrible games.

In spite of its weaknesses, Radiant Dawn delivers where it counts: Engaging characters, an interesting storyline, and above all, terrific strategic gameplay.

The long and short of it is that COD4 is both short and long: short in its refreshing single-player campaign, long in its deep multiplayer value. That the shortcomings of each should be the strong points of the other averts disaster on both fronts.

The long and short of it is that COD4 is both short and long: short in its refreshing single-player campaign, long in its deep multiplayer value. That the shortcomings of each should be the strong points of the other averts disaster on both fronts.

It’s a kinder, gentler MMO - Nerfed PvP, language filters, and all.

How do you score something that is so hellish (in more than one way) one second and so awesome the next? Hellgate: London probably just needed some extra time in Beta. Maybe pushing for Halloween was too much. I'm in the camp that would rather have a game delayed than have it get over-looked due to technical issues that could've been worked out beforehand.

A slightly better than average example of the MMO's out there, and brings a lot of the breadth of play from World of Warcraft along with some gameplay that is similar to City of Heroes. Despite my general disdain for chewing on my feet, I have to give this game two detached toes up.

Trading more traditional, menu-drilling RPG “depth” for sheer style, action, mechanical elegance and what might be called a refreshingly grim mood, The Witcher is one of the most compelling - if not the cheeriest - fantasy excursions to come along in many a moon.

Hopscotching its way from borrowed concept to borrowed concept, TimeShift is substantially less than the sum of its all-too-obvious parts.

Hopscotching its way from borrowed concept to borrowed concept, TimeShift is substantially less than the sum of its all-too-obvious parts.

This is essentially the same game they’ve been making for years with a couple new characters and updated graphics.

Though some of the round choices are odd and the commentary could use a bit more humor, the core trivia game here is a great choice for the casual game player looking for a trivia party game.

Piñatas are good when they contain candy and treats, but these so-called Party Animals only hold the broken dreams of the Public Broadcasting System. They shower the poison of lost opportunities and stink of failed marketing schemes.

As finely-presented as it is deep, welcoming to the newcomer, and yet more than ready to run veteran strategy gearheads down into their own personal animated Netherworld.

The Simpsons Game may just be the funniest video game ever, but funny is not the same as fun,and it's just not a very good game. I found myself wanting to finish the game just for the humor, even though I was screaming at the TV after falling down the 10,000th pit or when the camera showing me the wall again while i get killed.

The Simpsons Game may just be the funniest video game ever, but funny is not the same as fun,and it's just not a very good game. I found myself wanting to finish the game just for the humor, even though I was screaming at the TV after falling down the 10,000th pit or when the camera showing me the wall again while i get killed.

The Simpsons Game may just be the funniest video game ever, but funny is not the same as fun,and it's just not a very good game. I found myself wanting to finish the game just for the humor, even though I was screaming at the TV after falling down the 10,000th pit or when the camera showing me the wall again while i get killed.

The Simpsons Game may just be the funniest video game ever, but funny is not the same as fun,and it's just not a very good game. I found myself wanting to finish the game just for the humor, even though I was screaming at the TV after falling down the 10,000th pit or when the camera showing me the wall again while i get killed.

Far rougher around the edges than the first game. Since the game is built around broken and gutted execution mechanics, there’s nothing left to play but an emaciated and less-than-average stealth game. Even if the executions were restored to its original state, the game would still be a headless corpse wandering the dark streets searching for its missing gameplay.

Playing Guitar Hero III is like picking up a brand-new, fashionable (wireless!) guitar. It may have a light but solid body, a sexy and sophisticated shape, more durable strings, more easily adjustable tuners, and hell, it may just sound better, but it doesn’t have the spit and polish - that look of a mature instrument which reminds you of all the years you’ve spent with it, of all the sweat and beer stains.

Playing Guitar Hero III is like picking up a brand-new, fashionable (wireless!) guitar. It may have a light but solid body, a sexy and sophisticated shape, more durable strings, more easily adjustable tuners, and hell, it may just sound better, but it doesn’t have the spit and polish - that look of a mature instrument which reminds you of all the years you’ve spent with it, of all the sweat and beer stains.

Playing Guitar Hero III is like picking up a brand-new, fashionable (wireless!) guitar. It may have a light but solid body, a sexy and sophisticated shape, more durable strings, more easily adjustable tuners, and hell, it may just sound better, but it doesn’t have the spit and polish - that look of a mature instrument which reminds you of all the years you’ve spent with it, of all the sweat and beer stains.

Playing Guitar Hero III is like picking up a brand-new, fashionable (wireless!) guitar. It may have a light but solid body, a sexy and sophisticated shape, more durable strings, more easily adjustable tuners, and hell, it may just sound better, but it doesn’t have the spit and polish - that look of a mature instrument which reminds you of all the years you’ve spent with it, of all the sweat and beer stains.

There’s some repetition in the layouts for the rooms and floors, and frankly, there’s not much incentive for replay, but it’s a solid, challenging and surprisingly atmospheric, creepy ride while it lasts.

It is solidly the best card-based game on any platform, but compared to the refined mechanics of its collectible brethren and the fully-fleshed features of its digital brothers, it doesn’t fully grasp the inner nerd - neither the card nor video game player - within us all.

Given how much repetition is in the game, one would think it was much longer than its six to eight hour length. The lack of any kind of multiplayer hurts it further. And the final stake to the heart is the appallingly abrupt and inconclusive ending.

Given how much repetition is in the game, one would think it was much longer than its six to eight hour length. The lack of any kind of multiplayer hurts it further. And the final stake to the heart is the appallingly abrupt and inconclusive ending.

Given how much repetition is in the game, one would think it was much longer than its six to eight hour length. The lack of any kind of multiplayer hurts it further. And the final stake to the heart is the appallingly abrupt and inconclusive ending.

For the things that Conan gets right - big breasted naked lasses, blood and guts - it gets two things wrong - the use of magic, the god-awful voice acting. Otherwise, this is just another entry in the burgeoning God of War genre, neither offering anything in the way of innovation nor testing the limits of next-gen graphics.

For the things that Conan gets right - big breasted naked lasses, blood and guts - it gets two things wrong - the use of magic, the god-awful voice acting. Otherwise, this is just another entry in the burgeoning God of War genre, neither offering anything in the way of innovation nor testing the limits of next-gen graphics.

If you’re hardcore into flight sim games, you might find some satisfaction from the better parts of this highway to the danger zone, but if you’re looking for the next Crimson Skies, keep looking.

It’s a classic adventure game at heart.

The only glaring criticism I have for the game is its lack of multiplayer, online or otherwise. Whereas the last console Rachet and Clank, “Deadlocked,” introduced a promising multiplayer component for the PS2, the PS3 version beats a hasty retreat. It doesn’t affect the final product much, but for those still unsold on the PS3’s online network, it raises an eyebrow.

If you loved Front Mission in the past, or are just a big fan of the tactical RPG genre, or can’t get enough of stomping badguys with your giant titanium feet, then this is the right game for you. Otherwise, you might want to give this one a pass, and leave your Wanzer alone.

Concepts and premises like this whimsical survivor tale are fresh at least; now EA needs to escape from Suck Island and find fun gameplay.

Here we have a game about a character-driven movie, where the character shines. It may not be stellar, but Napoleon is plenty fun all around.

My mother didn't like me quitting the piano because I didn’t find it fun anymore, but Rhythm ‘N Notes commits a far worse offense. It takes the joy of music and turns it down to a mute.

It's a great choice for the wee Wii gamers in your life, but if you're old enough to get arrested for lurking around a real-life playground, you won't find the virtual version any more welcoming.

Sure, Beautiful Katamari is a little short on new ideas and online play has yet to prove itself. But the game is still blindingly bright, and a bargain at $40.

A genuinely-useful vocabulary-expanding tool, and just palatable enough in its activities for the conditioned gamer. It’s on the dry, academic side, of course - it’s an ‘edutainment’ title, isn’t it? - but it’s definitely challenging, and might even make you sound smarter, or pass the SAT.

I spend so much time criticizing this game only because the core mechanics are so good.

I spend so much time criticizing this game only because the core mechanics are so good.

This pint-sized port brings everything that makes Tony Hawk titles such an enjoyably irritating affair. As a do over to Downhill Jam, it’s as good as you can get with a new skateboard on old wheels.

Cocked to the side of intellectual myopia, Flash Focus is a blurry and beady exercise that wants you to keep it one foot away from you – but you’ll probably do that and more.

The Orange Box is more content on one disc than just about any other 360 game on the market...Though each game has its own drawbacks and limitations, and some games you might wish were on their own with a ton more content, The Orange Box is a fantastic deal and a worthy addition to any 360 library.

Without all of the environmental additions, Sega Rally Revo is an average racer at best.

Without all of the environmental additions, Sega Rally Revo is an average racer at best.

The single-player campaign is on the short side and the AI definitely isn’t the most tricked-out droid in the sandcrawler, but the medal-unlock challenges and multiplayer definitely give this shooter some space-legs.

Althought wrapped in a mediocre package, Final Fantasy Tactics is a stellar game. If Square Enix had spent just a bit more time on the in-game graphics, writing, and user interface, this could have been one of the top titles for the PSP.

No part of its design is disastrous, just unfocused. I can still appreciate what it tries to do, even while I complain about how it’s executed. If you’re someone who pines for originality and risk-taking, then Folklore is a tale worth flipping through.

This is a family game that even the most die-hard antigame activist could not possibly have a problem with, and is a great addition to your video game library if you have young ones about.

As the slacker par excellence, Donkey Kong would seem to be more suited to the casual gaming era than any other character in the Mario pantheon. Instead, as with any aging slacker, he’s simply a frustrating bore.

It had an excitingly original concept but failed to take full advantage of its possibilities. I suppose time will tell if Crash of the Titans is the stepping stone for a proper comeback, or if it’s just another cut in the bandicoot’s constant bloodletting.

As much as I pick on Crash, I was secretly hoping that Crash of the Titans would put him back in the spotlight. It had an excitingly original concept but failed to take full advantage of its possibilities.

Quake Wars is that odd girl you find at the bar at eleven o'clock on a Saturday night. She may look like a repressed librarian, but when you've drunk enough to stop caring about how she looks, she'll take you along for the ride of your life.

Multiplayer mode is a welcome addition, and despite how unfriendly the PSP can be sometimes, it’s a great quickie on a bus ride. Hot Pixel is not something you’ll play forever and ever, but it’s a nifty fad.

The graphics are mediocre in this next-gen world. The environments are nice enough, but the framerate is still a little choppy when compared with the slick polish of PGR 4 or Forza.

Logan’s Shadow has a number of unique little moments, like tossing taser darts around a corner or pushing a merc into a stove, that make up a fun, portable adventure. I do hope Gabe lightens up a little at some point, but if you still need a gift for some special PSP owner, Logan’s Shadow is a top-notch stocking stuffer.

PGR4 makes a lot of absurd decisions ranging from motorcycles to Lady Sovereign to unreadable menus to Quebec. While the core gameplay is the about the same as it has always been, the one good upgrade, the weather effects, isn’t enough to maintain PGR’s earlier decent showing.

It’s fun and humorous at first, but the lack of substance and challenge is a Spider-killer.

It’s fun and humorous at first, but the lack of substance and challenge is a Spider-killer.

I vote that we petition Krome Studios to either make a new character, or do the world a favor and pick up a franchise that deserves to die.

It's not quite as satisfying as the Celtics adding Kevin Garnett and, Ray Allen to support Paul Pierce in one off-season, but what is?

It's not quite as satisfying as the Celtics adding Kevin Garnett and, Ray Allen to support Paul Pierce in one off-season, but what is?

A great-looking game, it uses the DS better than any other title I’ve ever seen, and most importantly, it’s fun to play.

Where lies the big innovation in the third iteration? It looks better, and plays about the same, but it doesn't take many chances-the "forge" system and the new custom games are excluded from matchmaking, and the neat theater option isn't really an upgrade to the gameplay. But still, we applaud you, for in giving us more of the same, you have given us exactly what we wanted.

An excellent addition to an excellent game, and ample proof that the RTS genre can be both accessible and complex.

Having the real music and the real music videos is both an unexpected plus and an unexpected minus.

Whimsical, playful, and bright, MySims surrounds you with fun - but what you do is work.

Boring repetition.

Overall, World in Conflict is not bad, but if you've been keeping up to with other RTS titles, it will not come across as much other than a well-written single-player experience.

Syphon Filter: Dark Mirror is a small game with small ambitions. Within that scale, it succeeds admirably. It has too many quirks that clearly show its PSP roots, but if you don’t have a PSP handy, this version is worth at least a few hours of your time.

Do not play Warriors Orochi. You'll be in desperate need of high-caliber pain-killers to stomach all that cheese.

There aren’t many modes or options for gameplay, either. Party mode features duets, battles, and a hodgepodge “pass the mic” game. None of these make you feel competitive, and though the automatic leaderboards are neat and easy to keep track of, SingStar is more karaoke than video game.

Eternal Sonata isn’t a deep RPG by any means. There are few customizable options and very little in the way of exploration or even choice, but it is elegant and pretty.