Spank!'s Scores

  • Games
For 144 reviews, this publication has graded:
  • 38% higher than the average critic
  • 2% same as the average critic
  • 60% lower than the average critic
On average, this publication grades 2.1 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)
Average Game review score: 73
Highest review score: 100 ISS Pro Evolution
Lowest review score: 4 WWF Royal Rumble
Score distribution:
  1. Positive: 78 out of 144
  2. Negative: 10 out of 144
144 game reviews
    • 61 Metascore
    • 68 Critic Score
    Beyond an hour's playing it looks grim.
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    • 74 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    It's the best in the series and possibly one of the best real time strategy games around. However if you own "Settlers III" then this is more like an upgrade than a whole new game.
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    • 71 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    The finest gunplay action seen on the Playstation since the original.
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    • 80 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    Hostile Waters is not only a superb PC game it's actually one of the very best games I've ever played.
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    • 74 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    Could have done without some of the extra resource and development bits that seem rather tagged on but still a hefty challenge for war gamers.
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    • 32 Metascore
    • 40 Critic Score
    If you've got shorts, Simpsons Wrestling really should be eating them.
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    • 74 Metascore
    • 40 Critic Score
    About as worthwhile an investment as Russ Abbot's Party Atmosphere single, although it has to be said that the single represents considerably better value for money.
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    • 78 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    It's kind of brilliant - but it's also a bit of an underachiever, considering what could have been.
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    • 90 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    It's not the all-encompassing experience of godly power that was suggested. You have to play it in a fairly rigid and organised fashion.
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    • 84 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Everything you could hope for in a Quake game is present and correct, with two glaring exceptions - mouse/keyboard control, and on-line play.
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    • 87 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Serious Sam was born into a world where "Doom" has placated the need for logical thought and lives in a world governed by the visceral.
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    • 64 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    There's strong overtones of strategic gameplay but sadly, they're never properly realised. As Roy Walker from TV's Catchphrase might say, Away Team is good (ish), but it's not right.
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    • 77 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    This is definitely a game for baseball fans.
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    • 66 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    It's a quick fix of violence wrapped up in the sort of looks that will impress your non-PS2 owning mates, and at least you can show it off when they come round. Just bear in mind that it won't beat "Tekken," "DOA2" or "Soul Calibur" for replay, and you will enjoy it.
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    • 92 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    Witty, knowing, referential, and above all supremely playable, Conker is an absolute corker.
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    • 85 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Not the greatest game you'll ever play, but a good blast with plenty of atmosphere and ideas to see you through to the end.
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    • 65 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Funny gags, cool graphics, neat characters and easy progression make this an ideal way to wile away a rainy day. Don't expect too much and I guarantee you'll be pleasantly surprised.
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    • 84 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Princess Amidala might by nice and decorative, but a convincing military leader she ain't.
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    • 75 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    It's hard not to feel some satisfaction from decapitating an enemy with a cunningly timed swipe then watching his headless body loll for a few moments before collapsing in a heap. Or how about this - slice off a baddy's arm then pick it up and beat his mate to death with it. Blimmin' marvellous.
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    • 83 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    McRae Rally 2.0 oozes quality and demands to be played again and again.
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    • 81 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Yeah, as far as games of the genre go, this is excellent.
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    • 69 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    There are more than enough game variants here to keep you happy, playable in a convoy of fully customisable off-road vehicles and across some really detailed and expansive terrain. Check it out, it's the ultimate backseat drive.
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    • 68 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    The Stunt mode in particular is well worth a look. Not huge, it's nevertheless worth the price of admission alone.
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    • 69 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Oni
    Unlike many of today's action-girl heroes Konoko isn't all about big boobs and tight butt-cheeks. In contrast to a certain someone she spends the game firmly ensconced in kevlar body armour and combat fatigues.
    • Spank!
    • 89 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    One billion points for single handily dragging online RPGs out of a mire of orcs, beards and dreadful graphics. It's repetitive and shallow (kind of) but it's also amazingly beautiful, addictive and - believe it or not - socially rewarding and instructive!
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    • 73 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Oni
    Rock solid, all-action gameplay but misses out on a higher mark due to a few noticeable flaws.
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    • 87 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    What MSR fails to do is generate any real adrenalin rush.
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    • 80 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    Like the Soup Nazi from "Seinfeld" - it demands perfection from itself, so how can it expect any less from it's customers? Tough, but rewardingly so.
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    • 79 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    If you've got a Dreamcast or N64, buy the original Wetrix - it's got more to it and the gameplay is unfettered by irritating controls.
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    • 70 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Boasting value for money gameplay, a tight cohesive storyline and a gorgeously realistic setting this is a game that demands to be played.
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    • 48 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    Some people will be happy enough with mowing down people and fans of the series may like what they get but whether it will convince the non-believers is questionable.
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    • 82 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    AI flaws and a manual that takes rather a lot for granted make getting started a bit tedious, but when you do it's a great simulation that offers a whole lot more than the standard flight sim and a massive challenge to boot.
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    • 76 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    This will gain friends more because of it's online compatibility than the quality of the actual game which is a very average and graphically unimpressive racer-by-numbers.
    • Spank!
    • 85 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    A bold breath of fresh air. It delivers an unrivalled single player experience and providing you have the hardware, delivers a stunningly realised world to explore. The only weak point is the combat system.
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    • 85 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    A technically devastating graphics engine, the funniest script in computer games history, and a soupcon of strategy, together with imaginative and variety packed action.
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    • 90 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    If they could have added a bit more variety, in terms of plot twists and gameplay structure this could have been a real contender.
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    • 77 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Resident Evil 2 forces you into a state of emotional connection - I mean for God's sake, your characters limp and hold their ribs when they're hurt! Prick me, and do I not bleed? Kill me, do I not die?
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    • 90 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    If I had to choose my favourite (realistic) racing game, a couple of weeks ago I would have said Colin McRae but now it's most definitely the sequel.
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    • 78 Metascore
    • 69 Critic Score
    There's a lot of gameplay here but most of it is either excruciatingly dull or annoyingly derivative.
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    • 83 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    Fifa has got all the right connections while "ISS" is much better qualified to do its job.
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    • 63 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    I do think that the developers are guilty of trying to please all the people all of the time, but for all that Tomb Raider Chronicles is eminently playable.
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    • 57 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    For all it's flaws, you get a sense of achievement from this game. You do want to see what's coming next, and the exploration bits where you have to avoid a hazard by inching across a ledge or ducking under an obstacle are still absurdly enjoyable.
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    • 72 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Nothing particularly innovative, but like an old joke we've heard many times before, its familiarity is rather comforting.
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    • 65 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    I really, really enjoyed Gunman Chronicles, but the game is not without its weaknesses - though the graphics can be excellent, there are also some very amateurish textures present, as well as glitches that really should have been worked on.
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    • 90 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    The custom options are outstanding and there's tons of hidden stuff to find. The only real drawback are the painfully long loading times.
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    • 90 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Occasionally there is a bit of slowdown, but this is a perfectly fair price to pay for the huge wide-open levels and often stunning scenery and architecture.
    • Spank!
    • 73 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    It does a lot of things very well and were it not for a few mistakes it would be a classic.
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    • 67 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    Vacuous pap...It's not one of the worst travesties to ever soil a console, but merely a very average shooter that shouldn't have had the Star Wars license put anywhere near it.
    • Spank!
    • 51 Metascore
    • 40 Critic Score
    One wag referred to this game as the Timothy Dalton, rather than the Sean Connery, of Bond games. Balderdash. This is the George Lazenby - no, wait, the Woody Allen, in that crappy Casino Royale 007 spoof, of Bond games. Licensed to kill? On this evidence, James shouldn't even be licensed to drive.
    • Spank!
    • 89 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Same old gameplay which wrestling fans will lap up. There are enough new features in here to justify purchasing WWF No Mercy even if you already have "Wrestlemania 2000."
    • Spank!
    • 81 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    What is lacking in over familiar gameplay is made up for with impressive visuals, a genuine atmosphere and very friendly features and controls.
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    • 85 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    People looking for a more realistic and rewarding football experience go for "ISS Pro Evolution." If a fast and not too taxing kickabout is what you want, well, you know the score with FIFA games by now.
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    • 62 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    Without the thrills you got when you started playing the first game, a lot of the impact is lost - so in some ways, this isn't as good as the original.
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    • 64 Metascore
    • 30 Critic Score
    A complete and utter waste of time and money for anyone who isn't a die-hard shoot 'em-up junky.
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    • 94 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    The twists and turns of the plot are brought to life on screen in a way that leaves you itching to find out what's round the next corner.
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    • 75 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    I found it a little dull, but it's not aimed at me, it's aimed at children. Who may also find it a little dull.
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    • 71 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    An utterly pointless game in every way. Unless you're a Disney fanatic who's always wanted to drive Mickey Mouse round a load of bland go-kart track, this is not for you.
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    • 54 Metascore
    • 30 Critic Score
    If the design document for Sonic Shuffle contained anything more than the sentence "Make a clone of Mario Party but with Sonic characters" I'll be very much surprised. (But) Sega HQ left out the all-important instruction of: "Make sure you don't leave out all the good bits".
    • Spank!
    • 93 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Graphically the game is excellent, with crisp, clean characters and some very detailed textures.
    • Spank!
    • 91 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Within the game, you have access to a variety of weaponry such as generic pistols, machine guns, sniper rifles and the Bond style briefcase rocket launcher. Oh yes.
    • Spank!
    • 55 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    As something of a year round Grinch myself, I enjoyed this game immensely, and its simple but entertaining action will satisfy both the younger player as well as more learned men (and women) of the world like you or I.
    • Spank!
    • 88 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    It combines the best of team based gaming with an authentic and therefore exciting approach to tactical ops.
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    • 86 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    The real problem here is the shoulder-saggingly illogical puzzles. If you're a Monkey Island fan this is a bitter disappointment and if you're not you'll wonder what on earth all the fuss is about.
    • Spank!
    • 89 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    It's not a title with an immediate pull, you'll have to work at it to get something back, but it does present a breath of originality that we've been looking for some time.
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    • 81 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    An excellent homage to "GoldenEye" -- it doesn't really have anything in the way of new ideas but in some ways it's a more enjoyable single player game than "Perfect Dark."
    • Spank!
    • 56 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    The graphics aren't quite as good (as "Rustin Parr"), it' not as scary or atmospheric, the movement is less believable, the AI is poor and the dialogue isn't up to the same standard.
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    • 93 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    SSX
    A big, big game with plenty to offer and - I can't emphasize this enough - lots of challenge - but it can be frustrating. Persevere with it, though, and you'll get a lot out of this.
    • Spank!
    • 94 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    There's plenty of challenging levels and the most blinkered PS2 stalwart would have to admit that it looks amazing.
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    • 46 Metascore
    • 30 Critic Score
    While "SSX" may well be the best game on PS2, Surfing H30 is surely the worst - that's some claim.
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    • 72 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    It looks sweet and the gameplay is sufficiently untaxing as to be rather therapeutic.
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    • 91 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    The action is fast and exciting, the breasts still jiggle and the scene interaction could actually see you saying the word "wow!"
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    • 85 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    If you have never played a Tekken game before then prepare for perhaps the best fighting game ever, however Tekken veterans shouldn't expect too much.
    • 78 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    The PS2 marketing machine has done it's job. Now Sony have to back it up with quality software, not limp, glitchy sequels like this.
    • Spank!
    • 75 Metascore
    • 30 Critic Score
    If you've only got an attention span of ten minutes this is great. If you've got an IQ in double digits you should take this as a direct insult to your man/womanhood. Absolute cack.
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    • 95 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    A lot more difficult than "Ocarina of Time" and not quite as user-friendly.
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    • 86 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    Me, I'm gonna have another go, but I'm odd like that.
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    • 78 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Fearsome Transformer-like Mechs (robot body suits) hurtle around the screen cutting loose with the big guns, laying waste to all and sundry, coming on like stern, iron harbinger's of Armageddon - it's great.
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    • 63 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    While the lack of a light gun will disappoint some, and gamers looking for depth are barking up the wrong tree, Silent Scope offers some of the most stupidly pleasurable shooting action to be found on PS2 (or anywhere).
    • Spank!
    • 81 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    It's a competently put together shooter, but it doesn't really excel in any of the many pies it tries to place its fingers into.
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    • 75 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    I'm not given to venting my spleen, but I really didn't get off on this title.
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    • 86 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Americans + Frenchmen - Nazis = Fun
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    • 63 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    Fans of gun games would be far better served grabbing a copy of "House of the Dead 2" + Sega's gun.
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    • 70 Metascore
    • 7 Critic Score
    Its shallow nature may also put people off, but it's a laugh for everyone in multiplayer.
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    • 93 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    This is the fastest, smoothest, most graphically sumptuous first person shooter available at the moment. Get used to the control method and you will be riveted; Get a mouse and a keyboard and you'll be unstoppable.
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    • 84 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    If you're looking for no-frills old school resource management, then Red Alert 2 is what you are looking for.
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    • 64 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    It's obvious that this was a rushed attempt at getting some software ready for the PS2's launch and it's a shame.
    • Spank!
    • 57 Metascore
    • 30 Critic Score
    Slow paced, repetitive and with a weak storyline, DV is unlikely to please the usual RPG gamer, and will probably only appeal to the most ardent of Dungeons & Dragons freaks, and to players who just want a bit of mindless orc killing to occupy ten minutes here and there.
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    • 83 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    You can't fault the simulation, but there's not enough here to recommend it to anyone who isn't a die-hard fan of old-style aerial combat.
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    • 91 Metascore
    • 70 Critic Score
    A good, solid 3D platformer that won't disappoint fans of the purple dragon, but may leave fans of the genre feeling a little empty.
    • Spank!
    • 73 Metascore
    • 78 Critic Score
    Certainly not the deepest title you'll ever play and the control system can be horribly frustrating, but the atmosphere makes it worth persevering with, especially if you liked the movie.
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    • 76 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    The gaming equivalent of a vapid summer blockbuster: shallow, but fun while it lasts and a lot more enjoyable if you experience it with a friend.
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    • 62 Metascore
    • 50 Critic Score
    The most fun you'll have with this one will come from the first few tries - after which familiarity will rapidly breed contempt.
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    • 86 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    Slightly shallow, but good, blood-splattered fun for all that, DC 2 is at the very least one of the most graphically accomplished arcade games you'll see on the PlayStation.
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    • 69 Metascore
    • 80 Critic Score
    But if you want a game that's best in short sharp bursts, good fun and mildly relaxing to boot, you could do a lot worse.
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    • 54 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    Light years ahead of the competition? Well, no, but the kids may enjoy this one.
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    • 55 Metascore
    • 60 Critic Score
    The music's jaunty, the sound effects "zappy"; it looks okay, it plays okay, and it's all perfectly diverting for a few hours or so.
    • Spank!
    • 95 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    Where the game scores low is in the repeated use of cliched fantasy fodder in the shape of the narrative, nomenclature, audio and character portraits.
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    • 85 Metascore
    • 90 Critic Score
    Frustratingly difficult at first, F355 rewards the patient gamer with an experience that just can't be beaten.
    • Spank!
    • 78 Metascore
    • 72 Critic Score
    The problem is that the game really needed a huge injection of adrenaline, but it would appear that all that was offered was a cup of tea and a biscuit.
    • Spank!
    • 86 Metascore
    • 79 Critic Score
    Story, attention to detail, stunning visuals and exceptional character AI makes a standard shooting fare, compelling and enjoyable.
    • Spank!

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