I appreciate that Kemco does its business by tapping into people's nostalgia for games from the SNES and PlayStation One era, but insulting fans that have fond memories of those games with trash like Antiquia Lost needs to stop.

I'm all for adult games, and I'm all for the use of sex and sex themes within a game. Seed of the Dead could have been something really great; the idea of mixing the violence of Killing Floor with the sleazy, trashy humour and theme of a School Girl / Zombie Hunter, taken to the next level, could have made for something extreme and interesting. But Seed of the Dead doesn't work on any level. It's not erotic, it's not exciting, it's not interesting, and it's only just playable.

Steel Rivals is irredeemably flawed and should never have been made. I try to find the good in games, even when they are bad – if a game doesn’t work, I like to think that perhaps the concept is sound but poorly executed, or perhaps the development team is young but shows signs of promise. But Steel Rivals has none of that.

I wasn't expecting much from Space Stella. It's a Trooze-published game, after all. But what I actually good exceeded my expectations in the most wrong way possible. I don't like bandying around terms like "unplayable" much, since "unplayable" implies that the game cannot be completed, and most of the time it's juvenile hyperbole for "this is just a game I don't much like playing because it has some flaws in it." But Space Stella is genuinely unplayable. Even if I could handle the sickeningly janky gameplay (which I can't), I have a visceral desire to avoid playing a game so shallow, uninspired and downright empty as this one.

I have famously low demands when it comes to fan service games. I genuinely enjoyed Hentai Vs. Evil, and that is a game that you have to have an enormous tolerance for fan service to find entertaining on any level. I know who I am and I roll with it. But Waifu Impact is just beyond terrible. A beachy homage to Genshin Impact with bikinis and water pistol fights could have been a lot of fun. This, however plays more like a very first prototype of that excellent idea that someone actually dropped on to the Switch store about three years too early into development.

In the end, the started and overt point of Archlion Saga is that it was developed to introduce people who are less familiar with JRPGs to the genre. The developers failed in doing that, since anyone who plays this as their first JRPG won't touch another one for a very, very long time. No one likes having their intelligence insulted, even if they are completely new to something.

They hide behind nostalgic pixilated visuals, stick safely to existing game tropes, and are really quite culturally tone-deaf. While I love that digital distribution has allowed indie developers to create some genuine masterpieces that would never have had a chance otherwise, games like Kung Fu Fight! are the other side of that particular coin. If we didn’t have digital distribution there is no way a game like this would have ever been inflicted on us, and that wouldn’t have been a bad thing at all.

I don't think I've ever played a game as soulless of Jett Rocket 2.

This is going to be a short review, because Ayakashi Koi Gikyoku is effectively unplayable.

The story is overdone, the gameplay is bad, and the grammar is atrocious. Even the most dedicated of hidden object fans would be unhappy with this title.

Nothing redeems Asphalt 9. It's shallow, inferior game that has been built with the exclusive purpose of getting suckers to throw more money at it. This stuff should be left on mobile platforms or, better yet, never made.

What makes Gollum stand out is that most other developers and publishers then use their creative teams to try and hide the crass cynicism and capitalism. Daedalic didn’t bother with Gollum. This game represents the games industry with its mask off.

There is no respect from the developer in this game. Not for the genres, nor for the time that the game asks of its players. There is no greater insult that an artist can direct at their audience.

I was genuinely excited to play Lily of the Hollow - Resurrection. It seems like such a beautiful little visual novel and while I wasn’t expecting a masterpiece of localisation based on its low price, I was expecting to be able to read it. But that just cannot be done. Developers from Japan, China, Taiwan, Indonesia, and every other emerging game development centre through Asia-Pacific, listen to me carefully: You can have the most beautiful aesthetics and a heartwarming concept for your game. If the localisation isn’t going to be good, though, do not bother with an English release, because it is going to get reviews like this one. Make “invest in proper translation” your big resolution for 2021. I do not want to play any other games like Lily in the Hollow - Resurrection ever again.

I don’t have a problem with games that feature nudity and titillation. If a developer were to make a strip poker game then I would be all over that (assuming the poker played well enough). Bring on all the Gal*Guns and Dead or Alives that developers can produce. But for the love of Hatsune Miku, Nintendo, don’t let the eStore be flooded with this nonsense.

Let me introduce you to a game quite special. It's a game that is so offensive to the senses, and so utterly clumsily programmed, that it is genuinely unplayable. "Unplayable" in the literal sense that "I sure as hell couldn't finish it and I would be genuinely surprised if anyone actually could." Let me introduce you to Crimson Keep.

Anyhow, I digress. To come back to where I talk about the grift. The grift here is that each of these titles offer platinum trophies that can be "earned" with no effort required whatsoever. You'll sit through a laboured and completely ineffective 10-20 minute sermon on nonsense, play it through a couple of times to meet all its conditions, and then you'll get your trophy. I don't know if anyone still actually cares about those things, but as pathetic as it is as selling point for a pathetic series of games, it actually works. If these games didn't annoy me so much I'd be making a joke about how Sony's allowing hardcore Christian content onto the same platform where they've turned into puritans over anime boobs.

This game is a creatively broken, anti-intellectual insult. Bethesda spat in our faces and, because saliva is a kind of "content," figured that it could monetise it. Sadly, the success that Blades has seen on mobile - and will no doubt translate to success on the Switch as well - just goes to show that when it comes down to it, consumers actually like being spat on, because it means that they are getting content.

So we’ve got a game that has zero respect for aesthetic traditions, gameplay that is no more than a shallow grind, and a game about Japanese demons that somehow fails to be interesting to a guy that has a library shelf filled with books about yokai, yurei, oni and the rest. What an intolerable disgrace this is to video games as an art form.

It’s an insult in existing at all. I'd rather castrated myself with a rusted spoon than think about this game any longer.

This is one of the nastiest video games ever made.

Actually, to say that this game is an "insult" is an understatement. This is what happens when a bunch of manchildren get together and giggle at how edgy and "subversive" they are when they use Internet abbreviations and refuse to capitalise properly in a product that they've put on sale as though they are professionals. "Ooooh, we're so awesome," you can just hear them giggling at themselves as you play this. "We're like, totally deconstructing language."

Grey Skies: A War of the Worlds Story is one of the strongest arguments that copyright should remain on literature into perpetuity. I don't really believe that, of course, but when any hack can take a classic novel of such gravitas as War of the Worlds, and turn it into a delivery mechanism for a form of propaganda that the author stood diametrically opposed to, there's a problem. Not only has this developer completely insulted the author's memory and undermined the integrity of his work, but they've willfully delivered a game that completely misinterprets everything about the source material... and as a fan of Wells, good literature, and good video games that's just an insult to the intelligence.

Most damning, however, is that there’s nothing that actually saves Orc Slayer. There’s no real attempt to even do something interesting, different, or creative. This is a game that actively sets out to be a generic FPS with a medieval humans-vs-orcs theme. It doesn’t even try to be a good one. The developers know, surely, that the game isn’t remotely competitive with the better examples of the genre – even in the indie FPS space. That they clearly didn’t care enough about the player to try and do something even slightly different is an absolute insult, and the fact it can’t even get the basics of the genre down means that it deserves no respect from anyone.