Hale is pretty but bland. The voice-overs range from precious to Carrie Bradshaw impersonations.

The glimmers of truthfulness in the family nucleus offset the chilly crime elements. ... The office environment is less compelling as the coterie of feds... perform their unpleasant tasks with little personality. [23 Jan 2005]

Creator Byron Balasco’s sense of pacing seems off, as if he’s trying to figure out the direction as he goes along. The dialogue, too, runs in laps. If I had to listen to Grillo bark, “Relax!” one more time, I might punch my own TV. But with actors such as Lauria and Jonas driving the drama, Kingdom may yet rise.

Unfortunately, the drama between Federline and Jackson seems to be about the only reason to tune in, making this serving of “Fit Club” especially tasteless.

Meloni is smirky, Hargitay whiny, and transferred-from-"Homicide" detective John Munch (Richard Belzer) seems out of place. But Wolf has proved an expert at integrating cast changes on "L & O," and we have to believe he'll iron all this out. [20 Sept 1999, p.36]

If you like your comedy slathered in crude, this sitcom is catnip. Everyone else will wonder if CBS stopped making shows with recognizable human beings when “Everybody Loves Raymond” went off the air.

[A] dreary show that has all the edge of a doughnut hole and comes slathered with an astonishing amount of sexual innuendo for a network sitcom.

If there were a Match.com for sitcoms, this show would be blocked, banned and forgotten.

It's strangely devoid of drama. [23 Sep 2002]

You don’t need a CGI delusion whose one skill is pratfalls. Elfman is game and charming, and Scarrwener could be the reincarnation of Janeane Garofalo. Imaginary Mary just needs to go away.

The players seem to spend much of their time entering and exiting the same drab offices while shoveling exposition at one other.

Unfortunately, the pilot doesn't flesh out the premise, making the episode little more than an average "Outer Limits." With all the special-effects possibilities of a virtual realm, "Santiago City" looks like the set of "Combat" with a high-tech fence around it. [8 Oct 1999, p.S34]

Betas brims with raunch, perhaps in the belief that it is key to hooking younger viewers.­

He seemed nervous in a rapid-fire monologue that took shots at Dick Cheney, Alan Greenspan and Tiger Woods.

The show moves briskly but not well. Kazinsky is good and tries to continue the cranky character Hall so memorably creates, but the writing wants to turn him into Captain America.

When you title a show “Everything Sucks!” it can be viewed as an act of defiance or truth in advertising. Netflix’s new dramedy manages both in this sludge of teen angst.

One problem with the new season is we have too few favorites left and not nearly enough time with them.

The workplace segments are rife with sexual innuendo that don’t creep so much as just haul off and whack you in the face. ... There are some funny bits.

The show is so far removed from the standard set by "The Sopranos." It just doesn't get off the ground. [4 Apr 2000]

Perception is a head trip not worth the journey.

It’s a series without interesting characters, story or a modicum of tension.

Sean Saves the World actually left this viewer depressed about the health of network comedy.

From pariahs to parodies. What a quick ride. The party is almost over for Jersey Shore.

It’s wearying to watch actors of this caliber try to fluff laughs out of this dreariness.

The ladies are so desperate to be noticed, they recycle bits from other shows.

One problem with the show is intrinsic to its premise. Though mediation is valuable in the real world, it doesn't lead itself to interesting stories in a medium that chugs on conflict, victims and victors.

There’s no way to self-medicate against the relentless drear of this new medical drama.

This franchise finally jumps the sharknado.

Much of Hunters seems like torture porn. McMahon overacts as the unhinged Hunter who seems to want to destroy humanity but is taking the long road to armageddon. Phillips is just miscast as humanity’s best hope.

As a sitcom version of herself, the onetime “American Idol” outshines Gellar, which is not a good omen for the show. Williams seems ex­hausted. So is this show.

Kidman works hard here, but she is sabotaged by a common script.

Not even a return to Sin City - the site of the most notorious, debauched entry in the franchise - can jump-start any excitement into this, the 25th season of the unscripted series.

It's a dull blend, a slow-moving mind-rot creeping on unsuspecting viewers.

The unscripted answer to "Laverne & Shirley" will now be tamer than "Anne of Green Gables."

My Generation is based on a Swedish series, "On God's Highway." Dramatic storytelling seems to have veered off the road and crashed into a tree.

The humor is crude and risque and often at the expense of Indian culture. I could have lived without the defecation jokes. To be fair, the writers don't give America a pass.

There are some adorable tots mugging hard on NBC's Guy with Kids. The adults muck it all up.

[Smallville's Erica Durance, Stargate SG-1's Michael Shanks and The Vampire Diaries' Daniel Gillies] should be a winning cast, but the writing and plodding execution are worthy of a quick DNR order.

From Will Ferrell, Adam McKay and Anne Heche comes this mostly numb comedy about a judge with a messy personal life.

The slight sitcom has all the heft of a powder puff.

In this eight-episode, hourlong show, instead of Lauren Conrad, we get Katie, who is about as interesting as a McDonald’s salad.

The Gates is ultimately just another literary mashup with the undead, like Jane Austen's "Pride & Prejudice" tweaked with zombies, only here it's a stifling John Cheever story with bloodsuckers.

Let the drinking games commence.

It’s a little “Mad Max,” a little “Mortal Kombat,” a little “Gone with the Wind,” a lot head-scratchingly dumb.

Right now he’s as bland as Carson Daly.

My time spent in Angela's life was a wasted hour in my own so-called life. [24 Aug 1994, p.47]

Reincarnation, recycling, rip-off. On network TV, it’s all the same. Whatever you did in a past life, you don’t deserve this drivel.

The true horror here is the utter lack of imagination.

Fear resorts to the dumbest of jump scares and runs in circles. You’ll get impatient for a walker to come chomping by. You might be disappointed when one does. An action sequence that caps the extended premiere is choppy and amateurishly directed.

The show does not inspire confidence.

The premise is nonsensical, the characters little more substantial than fog and the central season long mystery is less a whodunit and more a why-bother.

This series won't last long enough for him to complete his education.

You can take the spiked head out of Jersey but you can't stop his "Shore" ways.

This show violates so many tenets of storytelling, it deserves to be tossed in the clink. Outlaw is about as entertaining as a legal brief on the case of Wall v. Paint Drying.

If you’ve seen one shark fall from the sky, you’ve seen them all. To its credit, in its last five minutes, Oh Hell No! amps up the craziness to a level that should have dominated the entire film.

Stepfather Todd reacts to news of the family's fifth car by reasoning that since they don't have enough parking spaces, the only solution is to buy a home. And we're off and running to the poor house. Again.

Akerman and Whitford have zero chemistry, and it doesn’t help that she looks young enough to be his daughter.

The dads in charge of the league are jerks, so Terry decides to lead a team of all-star misfits, making this sort of “Glee” for the physically uncoordinated. You’ll be done with this after an inning.

Louie differs from his late, unlamented 2006 HBO show "Lucky Louie" in that he dials back the volume. Yet he manages to not only push but also assault the boundaries of what's acceptable for basic cable, even at this late hour.

The shifts from comedy to bloodletting can be unnerving, even if the whole thing is unconvincing.

Red Widow might leave you feeling blue over the waste of time and talent.

Average acting and troubled storytelling can be forgiven in a film about music if the music is transcendent. But Lifetime couldn’t secure the rights to any Brown or Houston hits. So we get actors lip-syncing to imitators. Often the lip-syncing isn’t even synched.

The show is at least meta enough to have the department commander call out the sheer outrageousness of the appointment, but that doesn’t make it any more plausible.

As The Voice made loud and clear, there's not enough talent to go around.

Fox managed to turn the final hours of Jesus Christ into an extended “Today Show” concert. Except “Today” has never had so many taped segments. The bewildering sort-of-live production in New Orleans last night starred Tyler Perry as host and violated the cardinal rule of storytelling: SHOW, don’t tell.

Why did executive producer Jerry Bruckheimer ("Remember the Titans") populate his CBS series with such revolting characters? With the exception of Marg Helgenberger's harried but compassionate investigator, this is a crew teeming with bullies and psychos. [6 Oct 2000, p.S32]

The dress rehearsal was rough in many spots. The camera work at times was manic, punctuated by the stray stagehand ducking for cover. It also suffered from a huge distraction--the audience. ... Hudgens brought mad energy to her part. Valentina as the doomed Angel was affecting and downright kicky on “Today 4 U.” Brandon Victor Dixon, the scene-stealer from last year’s “Jesus Christ Superstar,” didn’t find his footing until late in the show. Others in the cast seemed drawn from a community theater production.

Beggars and Choosers has moments of high laughter and inside-y insight. Ultimately, though, it's a downer that dwells more on the cliches than the truths. [17 June 1999, p.59]

Stern, who starred in the "Home Alone" and "City Slickers" movies, isn't devoid of comic instincts. Perhaps that's why he seems to be going through the motions here with a barely concealed smirk.

Being allowed inside the cerebrum of Ally, I feel some sympathy for her. I like her more than I would if she were the typical TV cipher. But I don't like her enough to want to watch this flawed show about a lawyers-in-love triangle week after week. [4 Sep 1997]

There's some appealing energy and certainly adequate acting talent in "Just Shoot Me," but it lacks originality. [3 Mar 1997]

The whole enterprise dissolves too quickly into a '90s version of "White Shadow," with teacher Johnson as the angel of mercy sent to rescue her "at-risk" minority students from the forces of evil. [30 Sept 1996, p.34]

The Paul Reiser Show is stale and dated.

Most of the characters, however, are written and behave as if they are 14, and not 20-something graduate students. That said, the first episode ends on a terrific cliffhanger, when a creature from another realm--a man with a swarm of moths flitting around his head--attacks. A good three minutes does not excuse the hour that came before it. And the resolution is presented so poorly in the next episode that it sabotages any good will the first episode earned.

Just when you thought the teen melodrama was completely played out, along comes another trite "Dawson's Creek" clone to cause cringes of annoyance and pangs of distress. [12 Jul 2000]

You have to wonder if Morgan and Wong learned anything from Chris Carter. With no semblance of an ongoing secondary story line, such as the government conspiracy of "The X-Files, The Others" boils down to a gaggle of flaky mystics who flit about applying their brand of drippy New Age closure. [5 Feb 2000]

Nobody here is as self-obsessed as the least Kardashian, which will come as a relief to the celebrity-jaded, but we all know where the real talent lies in this family, and he's not onscreen enough to justify this series.

The cast is attractive, but nobody comes off well with material so cringe-worthy. [25 Nov 2011]

First, the dreck: The best thing that can be said about the unscripted series The Show With Vinny, starring “Jersey” castoff Vinny Guadagnino, is that the half-hour bumbles along like Sunday dinner with your most annoying relatives.

Judging from the first three episodes, the plan seems to be to throw enough explosions and gunfights at the screen so viewers are lulled into thinking they are watching some “Chicago: NCIS: Law & Order: Criminal Minds: Frontal Lobotomy” spinoff and forget to change the channel.

USA should toss this series into the clinker. [23 Jul 2000]

Even Bravo has too much class for this four-hour misery. ... Holmes and Donahue share some affecting moments, but the miniseries has no imagination and re-creates tabloid snapshots.

The lack of suspense and originality is depressing.

With the possible exception of Barnett, not one of the cast is remotely convincing or appealing in their parts. The helicopter action is neither impressive nor especially authentic looking.

Looks more like a tired old episode of "Wagon Train." [1 Jan 1998]

Here’s the kind of firm even “Boston Legal’s” Denny Crane would have the sense to close down. And I don’t think I’ve ever sat through so many penis jokes in the 8 p.m. hour.

These couples are just the sort you’d dodge at the office or at a party, so why you’d want to unwind with them on your TV is NBC’s headache. Truth Be Told: Not much fun here.

Its three-hour remake is poorly cast, badly choreographed and auto-tuned to an inch of its life, with a “La La Land”-inspired plot twist that is sure to make no one happy.

The show displays all the sophistication you might expect from a social media that limits its statements to 140 characters. Here's a tweet from me: This show is a piece of (bleep).

CW’s Labyrinth is quite possibly the worst miniseries ever made for TV.

I wanted to check out the moment Dorothy Gale was waterboarded.

"Watching Ellie" is a mess of cliches and lots of straining for chuckles. Louis-Dreyfus makes it look like a huge effort, which is all the more obvious because her Elaine on "Seinfeld" was seamlessly amusing. [15 Apr 2003]

To be fair, Last Resort does not insult ideology--it merely knocks your intelligence.

Marienthal is an energetic young actor, perhaps he'll find something more worthy of his talents after this dismal sitcom's inevitable cancellation. [2 Oct 2000, p.033]

There's nothing in this hour that will persuade any rational person.

The CGI stuff is cool; if only the acting were half as realistic.

It wants you to believe that Sheen is playing the most sane, vulnerable man in the world, yet he still comes off like a creep.

Kelley is known for cre­ating wonderfully mem­orable, sometimes deliriously neurotic characters. Judging from the writing here, it’s as if he’s been medicated into a stupor. Diagnosis: Waste of time.