Jesse Hassenger

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For 801 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 53% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 44% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 6.5 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Jesse Hassenger's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 59
Highest review score: 91 American Honey
Lowest review score: 12 Asking for It
Score distribution:
  1. Negative: 69 out of 801
801 movie reviews
    • 60 Metascore
    • 42 Jesse Hassenger
    Despite the amateurish lack of comic or dramatic timing, Christmas Pageant does have some old-fashioned charm.
    • 71 Metascore
    • 70 Jesse Hassenger
    There’s something rattling around, somewhere in Heretic, dealing with the power and limitations of belief, a movie that aspires to the deviousness of something like Barbarian, to which its setting bears the mildest of superficial resemblance. At some point, it escapes into the night without much trace.
    • 72 Metascore
    • 73 Jesse Hassenger
    Eastwood, still so earnestly attuned to the mechanics of personal guilt and faltering systems, finds timelessness in that growing unease.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 50 Jesse Hassenger
    Like its predecessors, Venom: The Last Dance has a little fun in the meantime. But in the end, it’s just a writhing symbiote waiting for a host that never shows up.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 49 Jesse Hassenger
    [Keaton] has the kind of presence that makes you sit up and pay a little more attention to whatever he’s saying, and his restless, punchy manner is unsentimental enough to sell sappy material, even as he appears to sidestep it. Goodrich ultimately requires more sidestepping than one man can handle.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 40 Jesse Hassenger
    The quirkiest thing about it is how much of that time it spends accidentally calling attention to its own overwritten, under-thought weaknesses.
    • 67 Metascore
    • 63 Jesse Hassenger
    Smile 2 ultimately seems struck dumb by its own possibilities, and gets stuck franchising hopelessness.
    • 71 Metascore
    • 75 Jesse Hassenger
    Blitz often feels like a pitched battle between the conventions of big-canvas war recreation and McQueen’s attempt to evoke the stranger, less obviously narrative-driven chaos that happens when the battlefield descends on a major urban center from the sky.
    • 59 Metascore
    • 56 Jesse Hassenger
    For a touch-and-go exercise in hoping the audience will fill in not just the narrative blanks but the emotional ones, there’s We Live in Time.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 50 Jesse Hassenger
    Rather than blazing a new trail for Lego cartoons, this may be the first one to feel like it’s adhering too closely to its instruction booklet.
    • 91 Metascore
    • 84 Jesse Hassenger
    Though Nickel Boys is at least in part about Black oppression and the suffering that comes along with it, Ross uses the movie’s point of view to avoid making a movie that turns that suffering into a marquee attraction or an endurance test.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 75 Jesse Hassenger
    It all threatens to resemble a hat on a hat, possibly worn by a snake eating its own tail. Yet Perry isn’t really going for a trippy hall-of-mirrors approach, even when he cuts together multiple performances of songs so that Pavements past, present, and fake-ass trade verses on their catalog of ’90s non-hits.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 66 Jesse Hassenger
    With his careful attention to the controlled emoting from both Swinton and Moore, so free of showy tearjerking or breakdowns, Almodóvar humanely and pointedly avoids turning The Room Next Door into an issue movie dedicated to assisted suicide. Then the movie backs into feeling like one anyway.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 63 Jesse Hassenger
    The promise of more music keeps the movie on life support when its drama threatens to flatline. When these sequences gradually recede from the movie, it feels as if someone should call an ambulance, but it’s also too late. What’s left are shadows of what might have been Saldaña and Gomez’s best on-screen performances, or Gascón’s breakthrough.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 40 Jesse Hassenger
    The grindhouse thought experiments can be engaging, and a sign that the movie is more interested in speculative fiction than in preaching toward a single specific theme. But the movie rampages too quickly and carelessly to really dig into any of its characters.
    • 45 Metascore
    • 50 Jesse Hassenger
    It isn’t just Harley Quinn fans who will be annoyed and possibly insulted by the filmmaker’s sour whims. The degree to which Phillips undermines fan expectations would be admirable if Joker: Folie À Deux wasn’t also something of a slog—and if its every creative decision didn’t feel strangely affectionless.
    • 91 Metascore
    • 83 Jesse Hassenger
    Baker obviously loves most of his characters, and while Anora doesn’t necessarily give off warmth, spending so much of time in the visceral chill of a Coney Island winter, it regards the entire situation with nonjudgmental good humor and a touch of melancholy.
    • 85 Metascore
    • 71 Jesse Hassenger
    At times, The Wild Robot feels almost elegiac – or is that just what happens when DreamWorks drops their worst habits and dedicates themselves to serving as a genuine creative competitor to their old rivals at Disney.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 58 Jesse Hassenger
    It’s more akin to speed-reading from the SNL memoir library than experiencing the thrilling unevenness—the captivating try-whatever stupidity—of the actual live show. It’s inconsequential in all the wrong places.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 58 Jesse Hassenger
    Look, as far as toy ads go, Transformers One is tolerable. It’s a little more fully imagined and rounded out than the jankier weirdness of its 1986 spiritual predecessor. The difference is that in 2024, a Transformers cartoon isn’t just selling toys to kids; it’s selling its own sketchy credibility to fans of all ages.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 70 Jesse Hassenger
    The movie’s lack of a clearly defined villain might alienate some genre fans; so might the lack of an easily trackable metaphor. Others will find it a relief. Never Let Go is a horror movie more interested in what it can evoke than what it can state or even imply.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 65 Jesse Hassenger
    Even as Plaza’s character and presence nudges the movie out of its comfort zone, the youthful, romantic recklessness it tries to celebrate feels theoretical – a lesson, not a life.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 91 Jesse Hassenger
    Rebel Ridge isn’t a lecture on civil asset forfeiture; it’s as elementally satisfying as a great Western. That’s really the genre Saulnier lands on here, complete with a moral clarity about its violence.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 64 Jesse Hassenger
    Even the movie’s best moments – and much of Blink Twice is entertaining through those moments – have the uncomfortable feeling of satire designed from a moneyed remove.
    • 30 Metascore
    • 68 Jesse Hassenger
    Like his Shell remake, the Sanders Crow makes something oddly compelling out of a bad idea.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 60 Jesse Hassenger
    It humbly presents the optional but delightful spectacle of watching John Woo have fun again.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 27 Jesse Hassenger
    The movie seems to pre-suppose that in our desperation to spend time with Wahlberg and Berry, any empty stupid simulacra will suffice as an excuse.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 69 Jesse Hassenger
    At his heart, Feig isn’t really a satirist – or an action director, despite his repeated efforts. He still makes a convincing underdog, though, fighting his way through misbegotten genre that shouldn’t work here nearly as well as it does.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 68 Jesse Hassenger
    None of the players here were in Ben Affleck’s The Town, but this feels like a companion piece to that one, too, in both its entertainment value and occasional overplayed hangdog Damon-Affleck pathos.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 83 Jesse Hassenger
    On one level, Shyamalan feels more comfortable than ever; Trap may cook more purely and entertainingly than anything in his last decade of self-styled pop hits. But it also suggests that there are discordant notes that he can’t, and probably shouldn’t, ever get out of his system.

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