Jesse Hassenger

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For 802 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 53% higher than the average critic
  • 3% same as the average critic
  • 44% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 6.5 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Jesse Hassenger's Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 59
Highest review score: 91 American Honey
Lowest review score: 12 Asking for It
Score distribution:
  1. Negative: 69 out of 802
802 movie reviews
    • 61 Metascore
    • 52 Jesse Hassenger
    Most of the time, though, How to Train Your Dragon’s live-action craft fails to match the equivalent in its animated counterpart, even with original filmmaker Dean DeBlois on hand for his live-action feature debut.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 66 Jesse Hassenger
    For much of its runtime, Good Fortune sustains a kind of witty, neo-Capra sensibility. When it comes time to bring that sensibility up to date, Ansari politely skips out.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 67 Jesse Hassenger
    It somehow manages to lack both the true moral murk of a great noir, while also eschewing the elemental drama of a great Western. It’s pretty good at both, though, and Tost seems like he knows it, without letting the movie’s solid craft go to his head.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 67 Jesse Hassenger
    Final Destination Bloodlines does deliver. The elaborate opening set piece is one of the series’ best.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 83 Jesse Hassenger
    Fire And Ash is terrific entertainment that occasionally gives the impression of well-appointed vamping; it’s almost enough to wonder if all the meticulous writer’s-room blueprinting of two-to-four Avatar sequels might have done as much harm as good. Viewers who just long for more time in Pandora are in luck: Cameron may not see a way out himself.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 73 Jesse Hassenger
    Heart Eyes can’t help but swoon at the rich tradition of slashers serving as first-date fodder. It’s not especially scary, but it’s a thrill all the same.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 75 Jesse Hassenger
    Dog
    As a whole, Dog is credible as a small-scale drama with some moments of light, puppyish comedy, from the man and the mutt. Like Clooney before him, Tatum hasn’t quite made his own Soderbergh movie. He has, however, made a surprisingly good one.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 60 Jesse Hassenger
    At times, Rogue Agent feels reluctant to fully engage in the kind of deception that might make it a trickier, more “fun” piece of work; it’s almost too tasteful for its own good.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 40 Jesse Hassenger
    By zeroing in on the eldest Addams child, the new Addams Family 2 exposes just how clunky and wrongheaded its take on Wednesday is — and what the animated movies get wrong about the family in general.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 67 Jesse Hassenger
    The movie is gentle enough for younger kids, but doesn’t feel obligated to play straight to a 5-year-old’s sensibility. For the first time in a while, DreamWorks seems to be trusting its filmmakers with a semi-original idea, rather than racing breathlessly to the finish line.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 60 Jesse Hassenger
    Much of it consists of Plankton talking to his frenemies about his marriage. As such, it often feels more like a three-episodes-and-change filibuster than a real movie.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 70 Jesse Hassenger
    There may be bolder DC superhero movies, but despite that body-horrific transformation, Blue Beetle sure is the nicest one in a while.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 55 Jesse Hassenger
    One point in favor of Bruckner’s new Hellraiser is that it takes some time before it feels truly lost.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 71 Jesse Hassenger
    Where 2022’s Scream showed how the series could keep adapting and changing to fit new cinematic trends, this one hints at how unsustainable franchise maintenance can feel over the long term, even for a series that’s enjoying its deserved resurgence in creativity and popularity.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 75 Jesse Hassenger
    As if to counteract the bummer of watching a raucous comedy on Netflix rather than in a theatrical setting, Bad Trip comes equipped with its own crowd energy—a collective faith that there’s no idiotic stunt that can’t be pulled back from the brink of disaster.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 67 Jesse Hassenger
    This movie is not quite the comic event it relentlessly advertises in its opening and closing moments. But it is a reminder of the talent behind the hubris.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 60 Jesse Hassenger
    It humbly presents the optional but delightful spectacle of watching John Woo have fun again.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 58 Jesse Hassenger
    It’s more akin to speed-reading from the SNL memoir library than experiencing the thrilling unevenness—the captivating try-whatever stupidity—of the actual live show. It’s inconsequential in all the wrong places.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 75 Jesse Hassenger
    As enjoyable as this movie is, sometimes it feels like it’s holding back; no one’s id runs wild. But the limitations of Ghostbusters make Wiig, McCarthy, McKinnon, and Jones even more valuable. They make a big franchise-starter warmer and more endearing than it needs to be.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 50 Jesse Hassenger
    When this nearly two-hour movie enters its intentionally laughless final stretch, Freakier Friday feels more and more like the extended encore of a reunion concert—not least because that’s essentially where it takes place.
    • 91 Metascore
    • 83 Jesse Hassenger
    Baker obviously loves most of his characters, and while Anora doesn’t necessarily give off warmth, spending so much of time in the visceral chill of a Coney Island winter, it regards the entire situation with nonjudgmental good humor and a touch of melancholy.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 58 Jesse Hassenger
    It’s an interesting approach to a fascinating story — yet it still can’t fully break free of its initial limitations.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 75 Jesse Hassenger
    For Kendrick in particular, it’s a sign that she could sing her way through something bigger.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 58 Jesse Hassenger
    By focusing on Mary (the subject of its source material), the film feels lopsided, especially without any other interesting characters apart from Elizabeth.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 70 Jesse Hassenger
    Campbell, Cox, and Arquette all have chances to shine, and Campbell’s rueful confidence even approaches something vaguely touching. But this is a crowded movie where the body count sometimes inspires relief rather than dread: Finally, some of these extra characters are being cleared out!
    • 60 Metascore
    • 67 Jesse Hassenger
    The actual sports stuff feels a little sweatier, with too much clamor for each animal teammate to really pop. But Goat still leaps over the worst pitfalls of big-studio kid-centric animation. Where it counts, the movie knows just enough ball.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 68 Jesse Hassenger
    As movies about a Liam Neeson character marinating in regrets before punching and shooting his way out of immediate danger go, this is a pretty good one, by which I mean at one point Neeson smokes a pipe while driving a car. It’s also Lorenz’s best as a director by a fair margin, a movie that feels inspired by Eastwood and old Westerns, but not beholden to them.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 50 Jesse Hassenger
    What keeps Fatale from really working as a noir pastiche (or, dare to dream, a Coens-esque ghoulish comedy of violently incompetent malfeasance) is its gentle, kid-gloved deference to the idea that Derrick is a good guy, rather than a weak-willed dope or even an affable bumbler in over his head.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 75 Jesse Hassenger
    This passion project also lets Norton indulge in the kind of tic-heavy acting challenge he embraced early in his career.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 68 Jesse Hassenger
    Hit-and-miss horror auteur Alexandre Aja knows how to deliver lean, mean horror action. Crawl is far less tongue-in-cheek than his Piranha remake, but it doesn’t build to a fever pitch or deliver dynamite setpieces.

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