Even with our expectations lowered, Yaiba still managed to disappoint. It’s even more sexist than we presumed, uglier than some 360 launch titles, and feels budget-y without the accompanying charm. Hayabusa deserves better.

Nothing bout the experience stands out, and in eschewing modern enhancements and conveniences, the developer hasn't crafted a purer or more-to-the-point shooter--just a much less interesting and impactful one. [April 2014, p.72]

At 30 bucks, Farming Simulator 2013 mainly reminds us why the expression “bought the farm” has such negative connotations.

In every respect, Fighter Within feels hacked together and devoid of interesting ideas or precise execution. The result is a game that would’ve been lousy at the launch of the original Kinect, but on Xbox One it’s just embarrassing.

Ultra die-hard series addicts will find some reward in a handful of lively but short cutscenes, but overall this licensed title lacks the joy and entertainment of its source material.

A survival mode and a handful of inventive multiplayer scenarios add some replayability, but considering that they suffer from the same issues that plague the core game, you're probably best leaving raider in the bomb. [Jan 2014, p.76]

Appalling.

Enduring the samey mission types 20 or more times apiece makes the mundane quest feel like a dull grind, and the challenging boss showdowns and resource-gathering minigames don’t stand out enough to offset the tedium.

A few tough boss battles drag on way too long, and at least one suffers from a game-breaking glitch that might force you to restart the entire level. That sort of crap is nobody’s idea of a good time. Truly dedicated soldiers might power through, but most will leave this contested rock to drift through space.

Endlessly bashing dim-witted hordes becomes mind-numbing almost to the point of hypnosis. Unless you’ve got some oddly strong hankering for scatological silliness, it’s probably best to simply flush twice and not look back.

For a game that plays up its characters’ sex appeal, Girl Fight is stupefyingly unattractive. The character models look like last-gen remnants, and their complete lack of personality and combat pizazz makes them utterly forgettable.

Dedicated fans of punishing classics like Mega Man might’ve relished the sense of accomplishment, but even they’ll grow tired of the drudgery, despite some tense boss battles against huge machines.

Despite the brevity and repetition, plenty of bugs plague these turtles. From low-level quirks like characters getting caught on objects in the environment, to high-level issues like A.I. partners abandoning us or a hacking minigame causing freezes, the amount of glitches in Out of the Shadows is pretty alarming.

Even when functional, however, Narco Terror lacks intrigue or interest, and feels like a lazy take on a well-worn blueprint.

The game does have a few bright spots. Its cel-shaded art style is fun to look at, and the level designs — which include a museum with a huge medieval-castle exhibit, plus an artificial forest inside a skyscraper — are unique and memorable. But that’s not enough to recommend what’s otherwise a stiff, banal mess of wasted potential.

Do yourself a favor: leave R.I.P.D. in its grave.

Dynasty Warriors 8 should be the pristine, refined culmination of a long-running franchise, but instead it’s a reminder of how much a series can deteriorate when it coasts on its success.

You might well opt to buy stat upgrades or temporary performance-boosting items instead, for the sake of simple one-on-one multiplayer confrontations. But because stat upgrades make little difference in the field, and you can carry only a single boost item at a time, you're probably better off just playing something else altogether.

Predictably, you’ll have a much better time blasting away in by-the-numbers deathmatch, team deathmatch, and capture-the-flag engagements — well, if you can find any other players in the ghost town that passes for Scourge’s multiplayer lobby. Given the game’s crippling problems, it’s hard to blame folks for staying away in droves.

A now-linear mess of awful mechanics, broken A.I., and constant glitches that wouldn’t have been remotely acceptable even in the console’s early days.

When stages start stretching past 10 to 15 minutes apiece thanks to minimal checkpoints and dozens of cheap deaths, though, the game known as a breezy pick-up-and-play classic on phones instead feels like a bitter grind on 360.

But the biggest bug of all came when Fireburst simply stopped working, and hard-froze our console any time we tried loading an event. Deleting and downloading the game anew didn’t help; we had to start over using another gamertag. Were we not reviewing this horrendous, bug-ridden racer, we would’ve taken that as a welcome sign to burn it from our memories and never look back.

Showdown may have slick cars, death-defying moments, and corny dialogue like the films, but it lacks the punch and precision that’s made the top Fast & Furious films so darn fun.

Though you’ll hunt pigs, turkey, elk, and many other animals across the 30 core missions, Hunter’s Trophy 2 is absolutely exhausting in its monotony. Neither the pursuit nor the kill proves remotely interesting, and it makes for a terribly tedious time.

For a rather simplistic platformer, Alien Spidy’s ultimately just too challenging, in all the wrong ways. Even after many play sessions, we didn’t feel like we were learning what we needed to eventually master it, and that’s a big turnoff.

Snoop has been involved in some lame non-musical ventures over the years, but Way of the Dogg may be a new low.

Pine and Quinto deliver the goods; if only this rollercoaster ride sped up instead of slamming the brakes every time we started to enjoy ourselves.

XBLA’s Double Dragon II: Wander of the Dragons pulls the beating heart out of Technōs’ 1988 coin-op Double Dragon II: The Revenge and stomps on it until it barely resembles the sequel we once loved.

It’s a generic zombie story to a Z, and not helped by horrible visuals that awkwardly recycle character models and stages. Together, these elements make the game feel like a reanimated corpse.

The worst, most persistent problem is the ridiculous and unalterable helicopter-style chase view, which lazily swoops from side to side as you tear through each turn.

An annoying feature that requires you to “buy” unlocked events with earned points adds unwelcome repetition, and 12-person multiplayer only means sharing the pain with others. Steer clear.

These bloodless battles just aren’t very exciting; they’re more likely to elicit yawns than trash-talk. Dollar Dash might briefly amuse younger gamers, but everyone else will feel robbed.

The occasional turn-based tactical shootout could’ve injected some much-needed verve, but the arbitrarily frugal placement of cover points too often forces your thugs to stand out in the open, and questionable line-of-sight will make you curse the inability to save in the middle of an engagement.

It's as maddening and absurdly designed as it sounds, and even the simple local co-op play — which allows four reticles onscreen at once — isn't enough to make Heavy Fire appealing.

When Multiverse is at its best, you'll enjoy its clever quips and competent shooting. Unfortunately, these highlights are all too rare.

But all the crayons and glitter in the world can't disguise the fact that this game is really just an animated examination booklet with a price tag.

An outrageously slight, unattractive, and ill-refined tribute to a franchise that deserves better.

In the rare instances that frantic limb-flailing does land your lasso around a calf's neck, the rewards are minimal and unsatisfying: success in the barely-there campaign only unlocks variations on the same boring events in new venues.

A soul-crushing farce that even dedicated strategy junkies should avoid.

You're better off just buying a puzzle magazine at the airport.

It's often difficult to tell where your character's bullets are heading and sometimes tough to see if environmental elements are being affected by your gunfire, both of which are vital in a shooter.

There's just no way this charmless slapdash mess is worth anywhere near its asking price, much less your hard-earned recreation time.

Unfortunately, the major addition for its XBLA debut - Kinect integration - is poorly implemented, leaving an otherwise shallow and dated experience.

Poor value is the real deal-breaker, though. Because Battleship weighs in at just seven single-player missions and zero multiplayer (seriously???), it's only a few hours of mindless fun, and you can easily beat it in a long afternoon. For $60, we deserve a game that sinks battleships, not wallets.

It's a joyless, grace-free slog dominated by repetitive stop-and-pop shootouts, lifeless linear environments, and inconsistent weapon physics, not to mention full-stop gameplay pauses during certain actions (like detonating a robot with an EMP grenade), obnoxiously tacky dialogue, missed audio cues, and overwrought enemy death screams that replay incessantly.

You never truly get the sense of being a pro podracer, a vicious monster, or a mighty Jedi, leaving you all-too-aware that you're just playing a videogame…and a mediocre one at that.

Wrecked sabotages itself at every turn.

Hard Lock relies on these barely interactive sequences to the point of absurdity.

Shoot Many Robots seemed like a sure thing, and its extensive and amusingly described weapon and gear options - which directly affect stats - are a standout feature; really, they're the only one that feels fully developed here. Nearly everything else around it is as unremarkable as a pile of bolts.

Though it may appeal to fighting-game greenhorns learning the ropes, Phantom Breaker is far too simplistic and bare-bones to justify its $40 price. [Apr 2012, p.85]

Regrettably, Puddle's enticing possibilities are mired in a swamp of irritating issues. Increasingly lethal obstacles take the place of actual puzzles, and overcoming them requires painful trial and error. Meanwhile, the camera frequently focuses on runaway specks even as most of your goop starts to dissolve once it's off-screen.

The bigger issue, though, is that Motion Explosion just isn't very interesting, either solo (with single stages or a randomized three-level Motion Mix) or in alternating rounds with four players. It's pretty much excitement-free.

Its novel setup could've made Amy an exciting, emotionally charged adventure. Instead, it's a grueling death-march through a gauntlet of poor design choices and feckless player punishment.

As you grit your teeth through 30 missions, you'll run into frustration aplenty. [Feb 2012, p.76]

Feels absolutely barren - which makes the $40 price point both baffling and ridiculous. [Feb 2012, p.74]

The same inconsistent Kinect recognition that drove us batty last year. [Feb 2012, p.74]

Survey responses tend to be puzzlingly inconsistent. [Feb 2012, p.74]

The few exciting moments are simply crushed by the feeling of having the same content and problems tossed into a slimmer and sleazily misleading "sequel."

We believe Duke still has at least one good game left in him, but regrettably, this DLC isn't it.

Charming visuals aside, Leedmees does little to distinguish itself, and less to justify its $10 price.

As clever as its core concept is, the Yoostar series still struggles to be more than a half-baked party trick - and it's one that's losing appeal with each lackluster performance.

Avoid this game like a darkened alley.

Sixteen-player online matches might offer some relief from the solo tedium…if you can locate someone to play with on Xbox Live. We tried several times with the retail game, to absolutely no avail.

Twister Mania would be a suitable XBLA download at a discount price, but at $50? For this piece of retail fluff? We'll stick with the plastic mat, thanks.

You're left with awkward, stilted voice-acting, serviceable graphics, and rote button-pushing that feel less like a game experience and more like channel-surfing on your couch. Skip.

You can stay busy in the pretty lengthy career mode, where you're competing in tournaments, unlocking various disciplines, and following a well-meaning but rough storyline. And there's local split-screen and online multiplayer supporting up to four players, but good luck convincing anyone else to join you in this seasonal depression.

NASCAR fan or no, you'll want to steer clear of Unleashed.

Online multiplayer rekindles fond memories of linked arcade machines, and 30 brief challenges break up the solo routine. But clunky handling and crayon visuals are a harsh reminder of why we rarely visit with the ghosts of videogame racing's past. Daytona USA was once a pace-setting leader; now it's a museum-ready relic.

Outside of the core gameplay, the career mode is a bore, the cartoony visual style is ugly, and the voice implementation is super-sloppy. Even as a Live Arcade game, Main Event wouldn't rank high on the fight card. As a fully priced retail Kinect game, it's an embarrassment.

Sadly, that's not the case in this tremendously poor adaptation, which nauseates from the outset with obnoxious music and garish menus. [Dec 2011, p.73]

But the only words this adaptation brings to mind are "suck my b*lls." [Dec 2011, p.68]

Even if the controls weren't the work of a lunatic, chaining maneuvers is unnecessarily frustrating. Fail to leave a pregnant pause between tricks, and X-Fighters ignores your input altogether.

Emulating and amplifying the bloodier side of fighting was, conceptually, a great way to separate Supremacy from other MMA titles. But because of its crippling issues, it stands alone as the one clumsy, bad brawler of its kind on Xbox 360.

The fast-paced simplicity of such a goofy goal made BurgerTime a hit in 1982's arcades, but World Tour tosses in fresh ingredients with little consideration for the damage they do to gameplay. [Oct 2011, p.81]

Deadliest Warrior's violent contests are mainly good only for amusement, as the shallow play mechanics and repetitive battles offer more laughs than longevity.

It's sloppy, boring, and inauthentic.

It's sad to see an under-the-radar favorite tank so spectacularly in an attempt to revitalize the brand, but Cartel is one call you can clearly push to voicemail.

It's a bit muddled, but the action is positively debilitating.

As a cheap, on-the-go timewaster, this game might work. But at $1[5], forget it. [Aug 2011, p.83]

Do yourself a favor and download the far superior Torchlight instead. It's not D&D, but it's a heck of a lot more fun to play. [Aug 2011, p.82]

But there's not one good reason to visit the same no-frills battlefield a dozen times or more just to grind out the improvements needed to conquer the next chapter. [Aug 2011, p.79]

Gearheads might keep coming back for the toys and outfits, but everyone else will run like hell. [Aug 2011, p.77]

With a great story and production values, that might've been enough, But everything about the game is less-than-heroic, including Thor himself. [Aug 2011, p.77]

The fact that every cheap death forces you to start a mission over from scratch is just the final nail in Xotic's suffocating coffin. [July 2011, p.81]

Unless ghostbusting is in your very marrow, Sanctum isn't worth the headaches. [June 2011, p.88]

Some of the bigger bosses are fun to take down, and the grim backgrounds are often quite pretty, but robotically pounding or charging the X button for hours on end will wear down the will-power of even the most stalwart gamers. [May 2011, p.71]

Do yourself a favor: stay as far away from this wreck as possible. [May 2011, p.80]

The idea of mind hackers who can wear other people's flesh as disposable armor in stop-and-pop firefights has potential, but Mindjack feels lobotomized. [April 2011, p.75]

Unless you're a Yu-Gi-Oh! master, stay far, far away. [March 2011, p.81]

Want a way to reap the benefits of multitasking physical and mental activity? Read a book on a treadmill instead. [March 2011, p.80]

Unless you have loot and robot fetishes, there's little reason to go here. [March 2011, p.81]

We've reached the point in the 360's lifecycle where even movie tie-ins have decent graphics. Too bad that the only part of Megamind: Ultimate Showdown that doesn't totally suck. [Feb 2011, p.83]

You might be itching to try a new crab-fishing sim, but don't fall into Sea of Chaos' minigame-laden trap. [Feb 2011, p.81]

Forty bucks for mostly junk is way too much. [Feb 2011, p.80]

Hardcore completists may appreciate squeezing the last bits out of Empire Bay, but all others should let this aggravating add-on sleep with the fishies. [Feb 2011, p.76]

With Kinect Sports hosting way better bowling, you should avoid this at all costs. [Feb 2011, p.75]

Even if Game Party was the only party-oriented Kinect game, we still wouldn't recommend it. [Feb 2011, p.73]

"Quotation Forthcoming"