Any Temple Run player will be familiar with the basic premise, and Infinity Runner does little to shake things up – instead delivering trial-and-error gameplay, dodgy production values and repeated.

It's time to stop pedalling this game. [Sept 2012, p.95]

A big-hearted game with some rip-off DLC. [Dec 2008, p.101]

It's tempting to praise Oxygen for tackling the tricky job of turning this pub sport into an enjoyable videogame but instead, all Oxygen proves is why darts is better off as a novelty mini-game rather than the main attraction.

Blood Knights holds as much annoyance as satisfaction. [Christmas 2013, p.103]

Neither monstrous nor jammy, just tedious. [July 2008, p.84]

Overall, it makes for a slightly better game than "Pac-Man" and "Ms Pac-Man," though that's not saying much. [Feb 2007, p.101]

The paper-thin strategy, piss-weak story, and miserable appearance are compounded by an insulting lack of polish.

An amazing new low for platforming games. [Christmas 2009, p.102]

Sails beneath already low expectations. [Jan 2013, p.91]

Like a train wreck - can't help but look. [Aug 2007, p.103]

The gaming equivalent of a massage, so unchallenging that your mind can rest up, recharge, and be in good mental health. [June 2008, p.73]

An average party game regurgitation. Not at this price. [Oct 2012, p.101]

Naughty bore more like. Yeah. [Sept 2010, p.88]

The idea of Deadfall, as a genuine raid on a legitimate tomb harks back to a fondly remembered era of Lara Croft. Losing Croft's platforming for a heavier puzzle element could have been great. Unfortunately, Deadfall Adventures fails to satisfy on either of the two goals it sets itself. The gunplay is juddering and weak, and the puzzles lack depth and satisfaction. Even a cabal of supernatural Nazis can't save this one.

Nobody in their right mind should buy this.

Venetica is a neat idea for an RPG hamstrung by an engine that can't do the maths quick enough and some terrible production values.

The unkindest cut of all is that you only rarely get to actually command the Enterprise, and when you do, the implementation would disgrace the average Call of Duty turret sequence.

An idiotic, stupidly playable romp from beginning to end, with such baffling diversions you can't help but love it. [April 2006, p.72]

A boring, brain-dead waste of time. [Oct 2009, p.82]

Your moves are clumsy, and unresponsive. Arenas wear you out, rather than challenge you. Boss battles are overwrought and underwhelming. The God at the climax of the Land of the Dead is defeated by a drawn-out process of ranged health-whittling and dodge-rolling.

It's impossible to overcome the tedium after the first few hours. [July 2010, p.103]

"Quotation Forthcoming"

The game's ultimate wrong turning is that it looks and plays like something released several years ago. [May 2008, p.88]

A stealth game with frustrating AI, horrible controls, and game-breaking bugs.

It's an error to think of Fatal Conspiracy as a game. That creates an expectation of fun - a level on which CSI doesn't try to deliver. [Issue#67, p.103]

Not too substantial, but surprisingly polished. [Apr 2009, p.91]

Nothing but a cynical movie cash-grab. [July 2010, p.99]

Nowhere near clever enough to bother with. [Dec 2008, p.100]

A tired sports game with wasted potential. [Dec 2007, p.109]

Its shear randomness and awfulness is a remarkable sight. Take it from us that its not a spectacle you need to witness first hand, nor have staining your Gamertag forever more.

A by-the-numbers budget shooter with very little in the way of spark. Not a total stinker, but hardly worth your cash either. [June 2006, p.69]

Why punish yourself? [Sept 2012, p.105]

A sub-par game that hasn't aged well. [Sept 2010, p.103]

One of the worst examples of this genre. [Mar 2010, p.115]

Way of the Dogg is a squandered opportunity to fill a genre gap in the Arcade. It's a quick hour's job to mop up 300G, though. So there's always that.

Truly "sub"-standard. [Aug 2010, p.105]

If you're a fan of Prison Break, why not consider assaulting some strangers and being sent to a real prison? You'll end up feeling marginally less violated than if you played this dog turd tie-in.

A total snooze cruise of a car combat game.

All that said, Scourge is cheap, and if you're looking for a no-frills co-op shooter to keep you and three friends mildly entertained, you could do worse.

You'd do better to get Kinect Sports instead. [Feb 2011, p.99]

A mercifully brief battle. [June 2011, p.103]

Developer Kylotonn has crafted the least appealing fantasy brawler imaginable, its stillborn mechanics drenched in over-compensatory cutscene-driven storytelling, its charms limited to the lure of unlockable combos and abilities.

Ready, Deadie, Gone. And don't come back. [Sept 2013, p.93]

Quirky but not worth the asking price. [Apr 2009, p.90]

One of gaming's greatest series bails horribly, loses its high score and sinks to a depressing new low. Truly awful.

And there's no sign of GLaDOS either. Boo! [Sept 2013, p.93]

Stagnant and lacking in substance, Battleship is a bit of a floater. [June 2012, p.105]

Becomes a mirthless, snails-pace co-op brawler set in boring marsh environments. [Christmas 2013, p.107]

It looks like it's been lazily ported from the PlayStation 2 because, frankly, it has. [July 2007, p.103]

DARK is frustrating, because that initial feeling of being a zippy blur of a vampire in a world of neon-lit night never leaves you. It's just swamped in frustrating design decisions, a script that lurches from passable to laughable, weak enemy AI, and a vortex of a lead character who's impossible to like or hate.

Avoid like you would a corpse flower. [Nov 2013, p.95]

It looks and plays like a budget title, and doesn't really offer anything new aside from curiosity value. Best left dead and buried.

A well deserved hammering. [July 2011, p.103]

A ponderous, plodding shooter with levels that drag on for aeons, that champions boring conservatism over death-defying aerobics. One of the least exciting shoot-'em-ups I've ever played.

You'd be a Raven lunatic to buy it. [Oct 2009, p.90]

More revolting than it is a revolution. [May 2009, p.87]

The new Steel Battalion is going to divide people, in case you hadn't guessed. Some players will choke on the interfacial blunders, gag at the sporadically entertaining missions and walk away calling it the worst game ever. Others, however, will regard even the flaws as a thrown gauntlet.

Strips football down and takes its soul.

Button-mashing action without depth. [Christmas 2010, p.93]

Awful - a crushing disappointment. [Oct 2010, p.102]

Tons of Nazis to shoot, but still mediocre. [Aug 2007, p.80]

On-rails action for the morally oblivious. [Jan 2012, p.100]

Zany, but this price is just ridiculous. [June 2008, p.79]

Definitely not worth the ridiculous 800 MP asking price. [Aug 2008, p.94]

We genuinely can't help but feel sorry for the art team, who've done a fantastic job of bringing the world and characters to life. These guys have clearly poured a lot of love into Lucha Fury, and it's a great shame to see amateur game design decisions kick this bucket of charm so ruthlessly down the gutter.

Great platforming, shame about the rest.

Overlord focuses too much on trying to be funny, not enough on being fun. [Jan 2016, p.85]

The done-to-death concept and boring missions don't do the game any favours. [July 2006, p.67]

This game originally came out on PC back in 2007, and it really has no place on Xbox 360 in 2009.

The story and comic feels light-hearted where it should be dark and disturbing, and the games lack longevity. [Issue#67, p.105]

A completely unremarkable WWII shooter with more bugs than Pixar's second feature film. There's nothing offensive about it, it's just subpar in every possible way, from AI to controls to visuals to voice acting. Feels like a launch window 360 game.

Not really worth investigating. [March 2012, p.91]

A black mark for the History Channel. [June 2008, p.72]

Five hours of playing this game will kill the entire genre for you, too. [Aug 2011, p.99]

There's only one number that reflects this perfectly average experience.

One to avoid like Crypto's anal probe. [Mar 2009, p.93]

It's a genuinely bad game in every respect. [May 2018, p.82]

Laborious and horribly put together, Agony really will put you through hell. [Aug 2018, p.78]

An amazingly limited game - so basic that you can't quite believe it's not free on Xbox Live Arcade. [Nov 2006, p.102]

Dreary and glitchy, a reminder that Hitman 2: Silent Assassin isn't as good as you recall. [May 2016, p.78]

Only hipsters and farming fetishists need apply. [Nov 2013, p.91]

It's such an empty, floating and bewildering mess that it's impossible to enjoy. [Issue#67, p.103]

The thrill of a 400-foot homer can't make up for many faults. Swing and a miss. [June 2018, p.80]

A promising concept is steamrollered in a game that doesn't really work as a platformer and breaks down entirely as a racer. We'd rather be kicked in the shins for eight hours than play this again.

Once you've stabbed one, run past one, and been killed by one, you've played enough. And that two minute process is not worth any amount of money.

A disaster even by movie-game standards. [Nov 2012, p.107]

Bustin' doesn't make us feel good. More like incredibly bored. [Oct 2016, p.103]

"Quotation Forthcoming"

This really is absolutely shocking.

Makes you want to jump off a cliff.

It's so terrible it nearly transcends its own boundaries and becomes something jaw-droppingly incredible - being memorably crap. [Apr 2014, p.89]

Sure to drag your party in a depressingly non-sexy direction. You'd have an edgier evening playing Monopoly.

Dismal in just about every possible way. [Feb 2010, p.110]

Passable idea with no charisma or presentation. [Feb 2012, p.99]

The worst game on Xbox 360 to date. [June 2009, p.93]

It's so similar to Spongebob, Nickelodeon must have a template for offensively awful games. [Christmas 2013, p.107]

Amy is a travesty from start to finish, a game that plainly admires but fatally misunderstands its peers. Save yourself an infinity of soul-crushing distress, and forget you ever heard about it.