A rental at best, but better we just sweep The Cartel under a sombrero and forget about it.

Not a Megan Fox in sight... and it’s still terrible.

What it comes down to of course is do you like Mahjong? Are you interested in learning it? And would you like to play it online? If you answer yes to these then yes, Funtown Mahjong is well worth a download.

If it was released for free, as a platform to hook people on paid-for DLC, Ridge Racer would be pretty cool. As it stands, at full retail price, it's one of the most preposterously ridiculous and - frankly - offensive attempts at separating a gamer from their money that we've ever seen.

The visuals are decent in Battleship, albeit extremely monotonous, and the controls are solid - but there are just too many negatives in the game to ever appreciate them.

One can only hope that Tony Hawk: Ride marks the end of these pointless bits of plastic, and not the end of the series itself, which surely calls for a more sophisticated makeover.

If, however, you're after something inoffensive to entertain the youngsters without having to explain about death, the birds and the bees or any other adult themes, you could do worse.

The soldiers Ivan’s teamed up with are a bunch of generic - almost cliché - and didn’t add to the story, or help with bosses, making them fairly pointless. However, despite all that, it was fun, and in the end this could have been a great straight up beat ’em up if they had left out the shooter aspect.

A very atmospheric, but unfortunately mediocre rinse-repeat horror title.

It’s a fun title for the kids, and even older gamers may get a bit nostalgic value of their old Hot Wheels cars.

It’s a fun, if shallow, platformer that’s held back by poor design beyond that core hook, a sense of humour that’s crass more often than it is funny, and plenty of bugs.

If you’re a One Piece noob, it’s a 6/10. It plays fine but suffers from a ‘this is for the fans’ attitude. This of course could also be a positive thing, and if you’re a huge fan of the series it’s probably going to be closer to a 7 or even an 8/10.

The gunplay is unimaginative and outwardly unfun.

Some very good writing bumps up the score for this one, but the lazy gameplay decisions make finishing the game a chore.

Unfortunately, the overall polish on the title can only be described as "a quick buff".

The visuals are generally clean and bright, while the audio is made up of your generic menu music, and a series of beeps and tones when instructed to move or perform a certain action.

As the plodding narrative progresses, these repetitive fighting and stealth tasks grow quickly tedious.

The only thing being scared away by the Wayward Manor’s ghost is this reviewer’s patience.

My main issue with Seduce Me is that, despite the invitation that is right there in the title of the game, none of the characters want to cooperate. No matter how high your score with a character - and hence your implied closeness to that character - they still play as though they want you to fail.

Perhaps one of the game’s biggest failings is its price - at US$29.99, you can twice buy Mount & Blade, which does everything Aethereus does but in a much more polished way.

There's nothing to save this shambles and no way to recommend it to anyone. If you're a fan of the movie, this will ruin it for you and if you like brawlers, there's a thousand better ones (some from more than 20 years ago outstrip this easily) to satiate your desires. Avoid.

As the plodding narrative progresses, these repetitive fighting and stealth tasks grow quickly tedious.

Everything about this game is either bog-standard and forgettable (audio and graphics fall under this heading) or broken and un-enjoyable (nearly all of the actual gameplay).

Now perhaps I’m just getting too old for this stuff, but it seemed to me that these guys aren’t as funny as they once were.

If you've got more money than sense, feel free to try it out. But if you're serious about gaming, and look for rewarding and engaging experiences, then stay well away.

The gaming equivalent of buying a gourmet mince and cheese pie - you'll be uncertain you've got your money's worth, and pretty sure you could have done a better job.

It's frustrating. More so because the easy bits are so repetitive and simple, while the tricky bits are random and insane.

Roller Coaster Tycoon 3D is disappointing in every key respect, and not recommended - unless you have a morbid curiosity and are interested to see how they managed to mess it up.