There's no "here" here.

There's no authentic life to Saint George beyond the setup/joke/laugh formula and its witless, gamy punchlines.

This is a shame and a waste of three gorgeous actresses, a wonderful actor (Gross) and an idea that--with a little more wit, smarter writing and less soap--could have yielded a winner.

Pilkington's musings are sometimes amusing and always pointless, but the animation almost totally nullifies the first and intensifies the second.

A couple of the lines are surprisingly offensive, and a couple others even surprisingly amusing.

The Unusuals is not a good show; it is a messy, uneven, silly, inconsequential show.

This series boasts some reasonably high production values, certainly for Comedy Central, with lots of energy, and a sense that it knows where it's going and how to get there. But the tone is so relentlessly mean-spirited, the guys so unlikable, their predicament so pathetic that Big Time deflates before your very eyes.

Even with endless talk about genitalia and the things people can do to them, The League is surprisingly dull and slack - without snap or payoff.

Bland, with no pop or energy, Scoundrels limps sadly along.

[Robinson] is funny, and there are fleeting reminders of that.... Then it all goes sour, and flat.

This is a very good cast laboring through terribly weak material.

With feet of clay, Aquarius plods relentlessly toward a climax everyone already knows, while making just enough fictional detours to make the journey truly exasperating.

There's some charm here, but it's as fleeting as a tweet.

Reminiscent of “Chico and the Man” (the mid-’70s NBC sitcom about a cranky garage owner and his Chicano employee), but it also aspires to a contemporary relevance--but manages only a weary crustiness.

There might be something smartly contemporary buried deep inside Manhattan Love Story, but the pilot is too busy demonstrating its cognizance of connected devices and social media.

You hope for a laugh, pray for one, then give up. To be fair, tonight's pilot runs fast (19 minutes) and feels more like a "sizzle reel" than a fully formed show. Williams, at least, is a genius, and maybe he'll get the time to turn this into something worth watching.

Enjoyable only if you enjoy watching people - and networks - making fools of themselves.

Get past the mawkishness (if you can) and there's a sweetness here, and geniality. The Michael J. Fox Show needs to be much more, but love is hard to shake.

What's fascinating is just how ruthlessly it has been edited, or (more likely) re-edited since the breakup to turn you-know-who into Little Ms. Perfect.

With her lovely, mobile face and gift for comedy, Lansbury would be an asset to any drama. But this preposterous mystery tale defeats her. [28 Sep 1984, p.52]

The pilot's accumulation of cute - oh, for the straightforward simplicity of bowling alley lawyer "Ed" - feels overbearing long before Kelley's courtroom summation turns societal sermon.

[Neil Patrick Harris was] hampered here by a format that might work better on daytime TV than at night, and better in the U.K. than here, and by gimmicks that seem more in step with the Velveeta spirit of "America's Got Talent," and by a show that's almost willfully aggravating, he may have met his match with Best Time Ever.

A frustrating film that leaves the questions--pretty much all of them--unanswered.

Crawford and Wayans display little rapport. That leaves racing cars, speeding bullets and wannabe wit to prop up an essentially superfluous show.

A grim, macabre march through a terrible crime, deploying a bad twist--the voice of the deceased.

Some amusing lines, but otherwise a disappointing misfire.

The pilot has some funny moments, but after that, Kirstie starts to flatline.

There's cheese (i.e., all Syfy flicks) and then there's cheese--Velveeta vs. Brie. But guess what? Ghost Shark is both! How victims die, which body parts are left and where, the perfectly predictable dialogue and straight-faced performances, even a historical nod to Roanoke--we're just not worthy of this much smartly executed satisfaction.

Sure, The Cougar is idiotic--these shows always are. That's a large part of their appeal. But casting fouled up here.

Talky, tired, tame Crisis is a misfire.

Orange" is a slog, where minutes seem to stretch into hours, hours into days ... and the drip, drip, drip of prison time becomes its own reality.

Amusing and harmless, but even Andy Cohen can’t raise the dead.

This feels more like a rushed afterthought by Fox instead of a fully developed premise that could carry a pair of seasoned actors to their retirement, or at least to a big payday.

Satire administered with a Wiffle ball bat. A dull thud, where there should be a sting.

It's pretty stock stuff. [23 March 2000]

Unsupervised is a cheerier, less nihilistic "Beavis and Butt-head Lite," and not remotely as funny or trenchant.

It's an attempt to do a 1970s comedy like "Barney Miller" - but without the laughs. [22 March 2000]

A paint-by-the-numbers biopic with the dramatic vitality of a tree stump.

A wan, weary network-sitcom-by-committee--oh, and Matt LeBlanc, too.

The hope is fleeting, the twist a tease, and the show--you must finally, reluctantly and quite accurately conclude--is basically just a bore.

The dialogue's preposterous, the plot ludicrous, and the premise as fresh as a wrung-out old mop.

With material this thin, the actors can only do a competent job of mimicry. Mimicry is about all you'll get.

Defying Gravity is a glorious, glimmering glop of foolishness--a spitball magnet of the first order that elicits jeers when it wants tears and catcalls when striving for philosophical heft.

Reboots can work ("Hawaii Five-0"), but they haven't got a prayer if they lavishly, ludicrously, embrace all the hooey and hokum of the original. Welcome to the new Angels.

It is so numbingly derivative--effectively a dull mash-up of "House" and "Private Practice"--that you quickly forget it's also numbingly silly. But then, maybe that's the whole idea.

Liz & Dick is not a complete disaster, nor entirely is Lohan.

The party's over, the hangover's begun, and the final summer looks like it's gonna be a long and wet one.

Magic City--on paper, not on screen--remains a compelling idea in search of great execution.

It's bright! It's energetic! It has that sort of dialogue that zips, zaps and zings! It's even ironic! Yet, at its very core, Motherhood is completely vacant.

Tired, self-amused, occasionally boorish, entirely dull and much (much) more about Ferrell than baseball, Campaneris, or those charities. The joke is a long one.

These guys are so bland and their together time so contrived, it's more fun to watch the gears turn on the tired docusoap machine.

Messy pilot that doesn't offer enough backstory, or reason to care all that much about Constantine.

There's desperation here, and if Happy Endings would slow down long enough to let itself breathe, it might find a footing.

Marta as Mob Mom is not fully believable or recognizable or (for that matter) relatable on any level. Without empathy, this "red widow" is just plain dull.

The Ex List--based on an Israeli hit ("Mythological Ex"), with whiffs of "How I Met Your Mother" and "My Name Is Earl" - is a flat-out great idea for a TV series. But Ruggiero (who's since left the show) needed a strong partner to reign in her worst impulses, like a running gag about shaved genitalia.

Silly, but let's take the glass half-full approach. There's nowhere to go but up.

Nothing particularly interesting or revelatory. For this to work--at least for viewers--The Hoff needs to move past self-parody, or at least take himself seriously. He tries here, but the exercise still seems flimsy and hollow.

Sleepy, listless, dull. But it has a great set; the beach and clouds on the horizon are alluring.

It's the tired guys will be guys trope dusted off for one of TV's pre-eminent comic actors, Tony Shalhoub, who can't even break through the smog of mediocrity that's enveloped him here.

It's all got the stirrings of something that should be funny, or wants to be funny, except that it's too often not - confoundedly, relentlessly, insistently not. [3 Jan 2015]

Cheer Perfection is numbing in its ordinariness--dull, trivial and never, ever outrageous.

The first hour manages to feel both mechanical and manipulative, without feeling truly exciting or even grounded anyplace.

Whoa, pardner. Calm down. There's too much struttin' and puffin' in the pilot for our taste. Rich casting and drama possibilities get mired in improbable events. And the basic premise -white father rides in to save black city? -is asking for trouble. [6 Oct 2000, p.B51]

In its zeal to zing local TV news, "Dog" loses any flavor of authenticity, which is absolutely essential for effective satire.

Yikes, this is calculating. Ouch, is it way too self-aware (even for teens). There's a caste system in high school? Are you shocked to learn this? [29 Sept 1999, p.B03]

The women's friendship radiates authentic undertones, beneath all the gooed-up personal drivel, although it's way too convenient how they always show up simultaneously at the same crime scenes.

The pilot serves up flashy ooh-ah instead of anything tangible to wrap our arms around.

By summer's lower standards, the series is watchably preposterous. [19 July 1992, p.3]

[A] shamelessly derivative cop show set in the shamelessly overexposed city by the bay, with high-school-play-level acting performances which help make the overall effect cornier than a cornfield in Kansas. And yet ... and yet, there's something appealing about ABC's new cop drama.

There's greatness begging to be grasped here, and nobody has a handle on it.

A mini-triumph of style over substance (of which there is almost none).

An energetic attempt ... What there isn't, unfortunately, is enough character development to make you care about anybody or anything. [1 Jan 1998]

Aside from the snappier editing and Sisco's greater sexual aggressiveness - like "Sex and the City's" Samantha, she gets the men on her most-wanted list - this could almost be a "Police Woman" episode from 30 years ago. [1 Oct 2003, p.B23]

There's nothing to relate to here, just to observe from afar, and only Tambor's as-always deft comic distraction gives us anything worth glancing at.

It's also one of those shows composed of such familiar ingredients, it already feels like a rerun. [22 Sept 2003, p.B02]

Yes, "Deadwood" was incomprehensible last season. It is incomprehensible this season. Fans will be delighted.

While neither awful nor even particularly bad, there is an earnest silliness to the whole thing.

There's just too much shtick and not enough personality, especially when the stars' previous hits found their funny in relatable human behavior.

It's not particularly funny, but it does have style and energy. [26 Feb 2002]

So much of tonight's series pilot feels so glib and rings so false, it's hard to believe this soapy saga comes from the quality-not-quantity production team of Tom Fontana and Julie Martin.

For this series to wear well, the forces of evil have to locate some clear motivation. Revolutionary ideology, world domination, pure greed - almost anything would be better than the explanation offered by next week's chief villain, who clings to her missile launcher and declares, "This is what I am." [12 Jan 1997, p.03]

While not the most stupid thing on the air, it borders on stupidity. [8 Jan 1996]

"Standoff" does seem to emerge miraculously out of the fumes of '70s TV - a near-perfect reformulation of every bone-weary cliche, every hackneyed piece of cop chatter (Dan Tanna lives!) that last-century TV glorified in.

What a wasted childhood my kids have had, I got to thinking while watching this otherwise normal Doogie Howser. It makes you look at your kids differently. What lazy bums they must be, still in high school at 16. [19 Sep 1989]

The good news is that The Second One often is worse (in a good way) and does boast at least one viral YouTube clip, starring the head of the Statue of Liberty. (Poor Lady Liberty.) But The Second One is also more predictable, silly and self-conscious of the legacy.... For "Sharknado" fans: B- For viewers with highly refined tastes--or any taste--and sharks: F+

Alex O'Loughlin is bogged down by trite dialogue, half-hearted support, perfunctory exposition, and better-to-look-good-than-make-sense production priorities.

Viewers will immediately locate the central flaw. If half of the contestants are so rich, then why go to all this trouble for $200,000?

There is no fear in this show or any of the doom, shame, ignominy or flat-out reprobation that comes with getting one's head handed to one by the Donald.... Without fear, there is no danger and without danger, no drama.

Tonight's "Skating" debut glides onto the air in a weird sort of middle zone, not quite cheesy enough to skewer, yet too much a cheese-product to take seriously.

Lacks the sharper edge of Hughes' movie. [23 Aug 1990]

What bothers me about "Evening Shade" is the lack of humor. [20 Sep 1990]

For every instance of contestants behaving in a transcendent manner, there are half a dozen demonstrations of pettiness, impatience, anger and jealousy. [5 Sep 2001]

Larry David is obnoxious in "Curb Your Enthusiasm" but very funny. Gervais' David is just obnoxious. ... It's the sort of comedy that only certain people can get, like the way dogs can hear sounds human can't. I'm ashamed to say, I couldn't take it more than one dinner hour. [19 Oct 2003]

This canned stew is further flavored with too-snappy comebacks, too-slick repartee and too-clever contrivances. Making it bearable are cast members who do somehow manage to seem like people next door.

"Spin City" doesn't have a good joke, other than Michael J. Fox. He has to carry the show himself. He has to be what makes you laugh. In the first three episodes he is not funny, he is cute. [7 Oct 1996]

Who is he? Who-who, who-who? I really want to know. But I don't think I want to sit through four or five episodes, let alone a season or two, to find out. [20 Sept 2002]

In the beginning, I thought it was well done, marvelously quirky and creepy, beautifully photographed, extraordinarily moody and well acted. But I can't imagine a reason to watch another episode. [27 Oct 1996]

It's somewhere between a small and a big bust. [24 Sep 1997]