Graphically, Nightcaster eats acid. The textures of the ground and rocks are barely N64 quality. [Feb 2002, p.90]

I can't think of a single part of this I'd like to see again - unless it's the graphics engine being reused in a completely different game. [Oct 2005, p.136]

One look at Extinction’s artwork may conjure thoughts of Shadow of the Colossus and Attack on Titan. While attaining the scale of these games, it doesn’t succeed in delivering the awe factor of engaging a new giant. They all look the same and you know what you need to do to drop them. Extinction ends up being shallow, repetitive, frustrating, and little more.

A flat-out crappy game. [Jan 2004, p.135]

Go to your local game store, hand the clerk your money, and buy something other than Opoona. [Apr 2008, p.95]

Cartoon monkeys are cool. This game is not. [Jan 2005, p.125]

The Hobbit: Kingdoms of Middle-earth lures you in with the promise of a strategic city builder, but once you’re on the hook, the fun dissipates as you are repeatedly penalized unless you keep a steady stream of costly mithril flowing through your city. I like strategic city-building games, and I like Tolkien’s universe. I don’t like The Hobbit: Kingdoms of Middle-earth.

The single-player experience can be completed in a few hours, and the painful minigames give you good reason to skip the multiplayer.

It's crippled by an over-reliance on the worst game design cliche ever invented: too much collecting. [Aug 2004, p.102]

Most of this game’s content is in betrayal of the license, and it’s not all smut, either. In one mission, you are tasked with assassinating Fidel Castro, an act that ends up being just as comedic as The Naked Gun’s assassination attempt on Queen Elizabeth II. Unfortunately, the intent of this sequence isn’t to make ­players laugh.

If I had more space I could detail the game's numerous flaws in control, design, and AI, but I don't. Thank God. [Jun 2006, p.112]

It's 2003, yet I'm still stuck turning six hidden gears in order to open one friggin' door? That's just archaic. Games like "Deus Ex" and "Eternal Darkness" have proven that puzzles don't have to be ridiculously monotonous. [Aug 2003, p.90]

Pretty uninspiring stuff, but I guess if you're a parent looking for a (relatively) harmless game to pick up for a small child it might do the trick. I'd like to think your kids deserve better.

In general, the minigames work about as well as Wii games always do: just enough to prevent me from calling them broken.

Think Syfy original movie. [Mar 2011, p.98]

Unfortunately, the good parts like the unlockable skills are obscured by generic enemy designs, monotonous combat and the most tedious boss battles I’ve seen.

The game, however, is a complete disaster, and is just barely playable. The content is definitely worth seeing, but you’ll have to trudge through gaming hell to see it.

Botched DS implementation. [July 2009, p.83]

It's just a long series of boss battles interspersed with dull cuscenes and pointless flying around. [Sept 2004, p.110]

The characters are shallow(amnesia strikes again), and the combat utilizes a clunkier version of the "Katamari Damacy" dual-analog controls. [May 2006, p.101]

If you enjoy making fun of bad movies with friends, the co-op mode might provide you a gaming equivalent, but that’s all it’s good for.

Entwined’s experimental nature reminds me of similar games that I’ve enjoyed, but there’s always a “minus” in the comparison; it’s like Journey minus the community, like Flower minus the message, like Rez minus the action. It is a stylish feast for the eyes and ears, but one that ultimately leaves you hungry.

A far cry from "Doom." The textures are even blockier and the effects entirely lackluster. [Dec 2001, p.118]

If you enjoy making fun of bad movies with friends, the co-op mode might provide you a gaming equivalent, but that’s all it’s good for.

Cyberpunk 2077 wasn’t optimized for last-gen consoles, and no amount of interesting side activities can remedy that. On PC, the world lives up to its title as the “City of Dreams.” For Xbox One and PlayStation 4 players, however, their time in Night City is likely a nightmare.

If robots ever do take over, I hope the human race doesn’t succumb to a force this stupid.

If I had more space I could detail the game's numerous flaws in control, design, and AI, but I don't. Thank God. [Jun 2006, p.112]

If Tyler Durden saw you sitting on your comfy couch, and playing Fight Club (possibly over your fancypants internet connection), he would probably hit you as hard as he could. [Jan 2005, p.119]