Playing the game is like watching an episode of "Oz" while a priest performs an exorcism on your liver. And if you like your gore served up hot and fresh, you've come to the right place.

A vibrant, eye-popping superhero disc that has more style, wit and compelling gameplay in its first 10 minutes than most games have in their entirety.

A vibrant, eye-popping superhero disc that has more style, wit and compelling gameplay in its first 10 minutes than most games have in their entirety.

A vibrant, eye-popping superhero disc that has more style, wit and compelling gameplay in its first 10 minutes than most games have in their entirety.

A vibrant, eye-popping superhero disc that has more style, wit and compelling gameplay in its first 10 minutes than most games have in their entirety.

And yet there's still something here that kept us playing to the end. Can't quite put our finger on it…ah yes, now we remember what it was: This game has a story that's almost too damn good for a video game.

And yet there's still something here that kept us playing to the end. Can't quite put our finger on it...ah yes, now we remember what it was: This game has a story that's almost too damn good for a video game.

The sequel features even more happy, shiny, Hello Kitty!—style idiocy. But peel away the idiocy, and you'll find the same dull, creatively bankrupt ball-rolling mini-game as the original.

Here's a puck game that's actually worthy of old number 99. The Franchise mode is nice and deep, the Wayne Vs. Wayne Arcade mode is mad addictive and the on-ice action is super slick without ever being too over-the-top.

This year's Tiger feels more complex and sophisticated than ever. Putting is more challenging (e.g., total bitch)... Yet, the game is still accessible to armchair golfers, thanks to those welcome arcade-y touches.

This year's Tiger feels more complex and sophisticated than ever. Putting is more challenging (e.g., total bitch)... Yet, the game is still accessible to armchair golfers, thanks to those welcome arcade-y touches.

And yet there's still something here that kept us playing to the end. Can't quite put our finger on it…ah yes, now we remember what it was: This game has a story that's almost too damn good for a video game.

Making Ninja Gaiden harder is like ordering waffles fixed with broken glass, with a helping of broken glass on the side. It's downright tasty at times, but you better have a taste for it before scarfing it down.

This year's Tiger feels more complex and sophisticated than ever. Putting is more challenging (e.g., total bitch)... Yet, the game is still accessible to armchair golfers, thanks to those welcome arcade-y touches.

This year's Tiger feels more complex and sophisticated than ever. Putting is more challenging (e.g., total bitch)... Yet, the game is still accessible to armchair golfers, thanks to those welcome arcade-y touches.

While the nutball MK mythos is annoying—click through those windy speeches by Raiden as quickly as possible—it's all good once disembodied heads are bouncing around like popcorn.

While the nutball MK mythos is annoying-click through those windy speeches by Raiden as quickly as possible-it's all good once disembodied heads are bouncing around like popcorn.

Remember playing awesome quarter-eaters like Swimmer and Pinball Action? Neither do we. Which means all you old farts can go back to chasing kids off your front lawns instead of playing this game.

Blindly swinging your sword while trying to manipulate your skeleton is like trying to drive a unicycle on a high wire covered with banana peels. And we all know how that brilliant little experiment ended, now don't we?

This is the fourth game in the series, and it's definitely the biggest, ballsiest, most nonsensical Burnout to date.

The game's third-person combat is pretty much D.O.A.—target, shoot, repeat, etc.—but things pick up considerably once you acquire your chainsaw and boomstick (aka 12-gauge shotgun). And things pick up again after you partner up with a wise-cracking midget Deadite.

The game's third-person combat is pretty much D.O.A.—target, shoot, repeat, etc.—but things pick up considerably once you acquire your chainsaw and boomstick (aka 12-gauge shotgun). And things pick up again after you partner up with a wise-cracking midget Deadite.

But battling groups of bad guys gets dangerously dull after an hour or two, especially when the game's unfair A.I., just like our booze-addled fathers, has a tendency to make you pay dearly for even the slightest gaff.

This is the fourth game in the series, and it's definitely the biggest, ballsiest, most nonsensical Burnout to date.

The game's third-person combat is pretty much D.O.A.-target, shoot, repeat, etc.-but things pick up considerably once you acquire your chainsaw and boomstick (aka 12-gauge shotgun). And things pick up again after you partner up with a wise-cracking midget Deadite.

And to top it all off, Lockdown features Lifetime channel–style scenes that do their damnedest to to make you think of your squad mates as real pals instead of the "meat shields" they really are.

And to top it all off, Lockdown features Lifetime channel–style scenes that do their damnedest to to make you think of your squad mates as real pals instead of the "meat shields" they really are.

With tons of modes, cars, unlockables, plus online play, this disc should keep you busy until your next mullet trim.