The controls here are totally unsatisfying. Tack on narrow-minded gameplay and dim graphics and you've got a game that dies quite easily, actually.

The execution falls flat on its head. The characters lack the mobility to face the alien menace and the game is unforgiving in its approach.

The loot isn't game-changing, the plot is bare-bones, and the story-building basically nonexistent. Unless you absolutely need to possess Cailan's sweet golden shoulderpads, stop your plans to Return to Ostagar and turn straight back.

Hydrophobia is just a Titanic of a shipwreck.

What Ultimate Ride does, it does pretty well. The problem is that it does so very, very little. And with an entrance fee of $40, there should be much, much more: people in foam rubber animal costumes, women flashing their breasts on the log ride, kids barfing during the loops, etc.

It's like a big aerial trick that looked cool, but ends up with the rider squashed by his own bike.

The Kinect might be going through something similar to what the Wii went through early on, but hopefully it gets through the growing pains... this one's gotta hurt.

If this were 1995, we might find more to like. But it’s 2006, and we don’t pay $40 for SNES remakes anymore, especially unimaginative ones that aren’t programmed well or translated properly like Astonishia Story.

It's a travesty to release an already mediocre game before ironing out all the kinks in its broken interface and having enough content to keep it interesting. It honestly feels like the PC version is just the beta test for next year's PS3 version.

It’s like an ironic mustache or mullet. Like having a Steven Segal DVD in your collection. You’ll never get any real use out of it. You just have it in with your other games to show you friends you have a sense of humor.

There's just not much here, and what is, feels rushed and half-hearted.

The ugly unpolished moments and Looney Tunes character animations are so silly, especially when the dead civilians everywhere are much more depressing than whimsical.

Fans of Backyard Wrestling may want to try this game out, but then again, they might have more fun with a blowtorch and video camera. Lord knows I would.

Tough aiming, repetitive gameplay and totally uninspired story elements send the game into a downward spiral, one that ends with a very short single-player mode and few extras. This cop should be kicked off the force.

Too many technical problems and not enough fun drive this bike straight into the ground. You'll have more fun playing "Hang On" again with "Shenmue."

Operation Flashpoint: Elite is simply an old, crippled vet that should have been left to its episodes of Judge Judy and servings of lime Jell-O in the gaming retirement home.

Kingdom Under Fire: Circle of Doom follows a straight-forward formula, but somehow, it can’t even get that right. Most of the time, it just makes the gameplay too easy, too basic, or too difficult by design.

It manages to stumble all over itself from the second you turn it on and never manages to recover. Simple control functions are handled clumsily, changing weapons is a chore and someone actually thought the dumb melee-exclusive levels would be a good idea. Like the rest of this stinker, it is not.

Continues on the path of cool ninja stealth action, but is thwarted by a plethora of traps like poor control and retarded AI.

may not be the World's Worst Game, but it's still a waste of time on Thursday night. Man, why couldn't they have made "When Animals Attack" instead?

The dream of a Sega-filled game that actually lives up to the legacy of Sega remains to be fulfilled.

True Crime: New York City replicates the over-the-top violence and goofy sexuality of GTA, but trashes that series' friendly interface, gorgeous environment, and dependable physics. If there's a lesson to be learned here, it's that what made GTA so enjoyable weren't the mature themes, but the execution.

The hobo outside could do a better job than whomever they picked to do the voice acting.

This might be a good example of what some teenager could do with the Unreal engine, a Commodore 64 and 2 sticks of chewing gum, but it's a poor example of a good game.

Athens 2004 might be the least customizable sports game I’ve ever played. You can participate as any one of 64 countries, but you can’t create an athlete. There are no stats, no training, and no career. You pick your country and gender, and the game then just gives you a pre-set runner/jumper/thrower/swimmer who looks the part, ethnically speaking.

True Crime: New York City replicates the over-the-top violence and goofy sexuality of GTA, but trashes that series' friendly interface, gorgeous environment, and dependable physics. If there's a lesson to be learned here, it's that what made GTA so enjoyable weren't the mature themes, but the execution.

3D effect really, really, really hurts.

Five to six hours in and Blacksite curls up and expires, ending mercifully an experience that not even an alien would care to dissect.