Tina Fey is in the film, for heaven’s sake, and I love her to pieces, but by now we know to expect something humdrum when she’s on a movie screen.

Embarrassing and weird.

Even the love story doesn’t work, because Moretz and Blackley exhibit zero romantic chemistry, and it’s never exactly clear why the pair love each other so much.

Cripplingly lifeless.

The film is confusingly and sloppily put together, edited down to the point that the few genuine jokes of Let’s Be Cops are given precious little time to breathe, before zipping into the next sequence of increasingly irrational events.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles isn’t a movie; it’s a brand re-launch that’s going to satisfy stockholders far more than it’s going to entertain the people who paid to watch it.

A relentlessly unfunny, charmless send-up of better films with better ideas.

Sound nonsensical? It is.

Plainly unfunny.

We all have childhoods to remember. Art needs to do more than just remind us.

In the running for worst film of the year... and it's only April.

Does this mean that Sabotage is a rich, morally complex story about the gray zone between good and evil? Hell, no. It just means it is a bungle.

Nymphomaniac Vol. 1 is the worst thing Lars Von Trier has ever associated himself with.

The empty violence and pointless style are only the biggest problems.

For a movie with the ostensible mission of spreading the Gospel, it does a poor job of speaking to anyone except the faithful.

The first sixty minutes of Pompeii are awful, bordering on unwatchable... The final forty-five minutes of the movie however are, by sheer force of will, irrefutably entertaining. At least there’s raining death in the form of fireballs smashing up the place.

Not every book should be made into a film and, as appears to be the case with Winter’s Tale, not every book can be (especially this one).

Relentlessly awful.

While the art of action filmmaking depreciates, Harlin remains steadfast in his classicism, even if the movie doesn’t have the foundation to support him.

Like a swollen boxer's eye, it should have been cut.

Insufferably boring, culturally hegemonic, and profoundly ugly.

Ti West’s pointless new film The Sacrament, an exercise in talking loud and saying nothing, isn’t just bad, it’s infuriating.

A slumming Spike Lee is still better than most directors at the top of their game, but Oldboy isn’t just Lee’s worst movie, it’s practically his “Wicker Man”.

It’s just boring – and boring in a way that apparently has no endgame.

A pastiche of bad film cliches and scenes devoid of any real conflict or character development.

The absolute antithesis to the pioneering punk spirit it tries to portray.

Fading Gigolo wants to be some sort of sunny tapestry about New York’s social groups, but it’s impossible to see past its absurd premise.

The best word to describe it is strange, though it could have been halfway decent (yes, all the way up to halfway decent) if the third act hadn’t succumbed to the crescendo of craziness that had been building for the first hour.