Read Negative User Reviews for xXx: Return of Xander Cage

3

PipeCJan 22, 2017

Someone Has to Kick This Filmic Mess' Ass

In a world lacking of glorious heroes, who better than Neymar to prevent the end of the human race; just with the laughable and banal opening, the film gives a minimum sign of the scabrous experienceSomeone Has to Kick This Filmic Mess' Ass

In a world lacking of glorious heroes, who better than Neymar to prevent the end of the human race; just with the laughable and banal opening, the film gives a minimum sign of the scabrous experience in which you'll be immersed, no, in this case, the appropriate word is not 'immerse', the correct word would be endure.In front of heterogeneous movie proposals which inaugurate this year, "xXx" title itself does not portend no good, and however, for daredevils or unlikely fans of the "prodigious" saga who decide to buy a ticket will have to put up with a permanent vulnerability towards your eyes, ears, reality perceptions, aesthetic hyperesthesia, authentic credibility and decency conception.

Anyone who considers that "Fast & Furious" saga is quite sophisticated or "James Bond" franchise pretty misogynist; Hollywood, the place in where anything is contingent, has made a catalog of frivolous films, in which the primary thing is its action scenes of dubious likelihood, that ones pile up on the screen without mercy along by thunderous musical accompaniments.

One of the exiguous achievements that the film runs with determination is that it is not imperative to see the hollow prequels since they add new characters and also offer one succinct explanation of "Triple X" organization, you must consume it with objective eyes. Xander Cage is now 49 years old, the last time that they mention him was as deceased person, however, this one was simply a pretext for its sequel "XXX: State of the Union" (starring by Ice Cube) in order to leave the path free, clearly, it was another legitimate worthless film, both for critics as audience. Now, Cage takes refuge in the Dominican Republic, a country in which he scales a huge power tower, descends a whole jungle in ski and slides along a road in skate, all this for his beloved new community can see a football game, is there something more ineffective and ridiculous? Although the franchise is characterized by delivering vast portions of absurd e implausible components such as its impossible scenes taking fiction to unbearable limits, we do not require more of this, nobody asked for it and perhaps nobody will ever seek it.

The Pandora's box, a mechanism operating all satellites orbiting Earth planet, has fallen into wrong hands, for avoiding this, Security National Agency resorts again to services of the agent and extreme sports lover for rescuing it and thus saving to the world of a threat, which does not look like something lethal due to its constant change of position.Cage will set up a team of maladjusted people to achieve his aim: Tennyson (Rory McCann) a Daredevil in the real life, Nicks (Kris Wu) a well versed machinist, Talon (Tony Jaa) a DJ and the best inside this CGI hell, Adele Wolff (Ruby Rose) an attractive and fearless sniper.

It expects to be promoted in arduous and demanding celluloid world through celebrities of different subjects: Neymar, he is more than detestable in his role as superman, seriously, if he is a footballer, is a footballer; Ariadna Gutierrez, Colombian miss universe (at least by some seconds), looks like if she was in a video clip, If she is a professional model, is simply a model; Nicki Jam, the Colombian singer, is surplus and is feels superfluous in the story, however, among all that core social, he does well, if he is a singer, is a singer.None of them have acting skills and although the effort of adding cultural diversity to the film has a good heart, it reduces what little has been achieved.

Becoming a model to follow for the sexist and English-speaking Hollywood of the 21st century, in the film are only female roles dazzle on screen, being Rose and Bollywood's rising star Deepika Padukone who interpret action sequences and characters as theatrical as memorable, they and irregular Nina Dobrev are those who rescued a portion of the length feature, the rest is missing time.

Execrable antagonists, scenes with CGI so palpable that we could even perceive cables and green screens behind Vin Diesel, a script with insignificant punch-lines, a development jam-packed with tedium and boredom and worst of all, a direction palliating negatively the miserable movie. If you want to make an action motion picture with analogous and inexorable dialogs, an interesting story, with real suspense and solid thematic must avoid a simple name at all costs: D. J. Caruso.

Boring, unstable, fatiguing, unsustainable and unbearable, "xXx" is the first big mess in 2017, nobody asked for it but unceasingly continues arriving. There is no one best way to describe celluloid's substance than Samuel L. Jackson does it: kick some ass, get the girl and try to look dope while you doing it; sadly, leaving "dope" to miles away, it gets these three requirements explicitly because are stipulated in the script. Maybe, the next title should have a light and required change: from "Reactivated" to "Deactivated", please.… Expand

1 of 1 users found this helpful10

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1

red_ninja_9Apr 19, 2017

This movie put the "D" in "Dumb". My gosh, talking about over the top action that completely defying physics. Story is below average, dialogue is boring, acting is terrible. Worst movie in 2017 hands down. Vin Diesel should not make movies, iThis movie put the "D" in "Dumb". My gosh, talking about over the top action that completely defying physics. Story is below average, dialogue is boring, acting is terrible. Worst movie in 2017 hands down. Vin Diesel should not make movies, i repeat. Only watch this movie if you want to lose half your IQ points.… Expand

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0

ZofuzJan 25, 2017

Simply the worst movie I've seen in 5 years at least. No screenplay, no acting, poor action, poor humor. Just a bunch of lazy cut action scenes of 50yo teenager, DJ, hipsters and a couple of tattooed club girls killing a lot of USSOCOM orSimply the worst movie I've seen in 5 years at least. No screenplay, no acting, poor action, poor humor. Just a bunch of lazy cut action scenes of 50yo teenager, DJ, hipsters and a couple of tattooed club girls killing a lot of USSOCOM or Russian 'Spetznaz' operatives with no casualties on their side at all... This product looks like kind of Chinese (three of four filmmakers are actually Chinese companies) video game, not a movie. Not even close.… Expand

4 of 6 users found this helpful42

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17AMarioOdysseyJan 22, 2017

This is the worst, most ridiculous movie I have ever seen, man I thought January movies were bad but this was simply the worst and most uninspired, it's so stupid only 2 year-olds can like it, no one else will enjoy this BS.

5 of 8 users found this helpful53

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2

RealMuthaFNov 1, 2017

Wow, this is some woeful garbage that I have just managed to finish watching on my second try.

I watched the first two xXx movies back when I was still in school, and I liked those a lot, especially the second one due to all the hip-hopWow, this is some woeful garbage that I have just managed to finish watching on my second try.

I watched the first two xXx movies back when I was still in school, and I liked those a lot, especially the second one due to all the hip-hop influences, but this just should not exist.

Everything here is complete trash: nonsensical plot, awfully cringy jokes, embarrassing one liners, pathetically cheap CGI, bland action sequences, retarded dialogues, actors who do not act. Diesel trying to look fast and agile while being an overweight badly aging walking ballsack is just laughable. And to boost his ego he had to include a group orgy scene with himself, disgusting. I wonder how much were the actresses paid to make out with him. Another particularly annoying actress in my opinion was the Indian woman, who could not act for sh*t (more so than the others) and had a very repulsive accent. The whole flick looks like some sort of a dreadful mix between an early 2000's direct-to-DVD B movie and some Bollywood circus. Kind of like Fast & Furious but even more stupid (which I didn't think was humanly possible) and with a smaller budget.

The only two reasons why this is not a 1/10 are Ice Cube's cameo with his own "Thank God" playing in the background, and the presence of Nina Dobrev, who is almost too adorable. If you hold any good memory of the first two movies, do yourself a favor and do not watch this piece of sh*t.… Expand