Machete Kills
Open Road Films | Release Date: October 11, 2013
6.0
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Mixed or average reviews based on 229 Ratings
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103
Mixed:
78
Negative:
48
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User Reviews

User scoreBy dateMost helpful
4
PStakhivOct 17, 2013
"Machete Kills" is inferior to the first one, has no cohesive plot, and the best thing in this movie is Mel Gibson! But it works as it is, mediocre parody with some creative kills!
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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5
morfilDec 7, 2013
Let me start off by saying love love love the first Machete. I can watch it anytime... This one, not so much. Robert Rodriquez swung for the fences with this one and it missed. Some people will never ever say anything bad about the guy andLet me start off by saying love love love the first Machete. I can watch it anytime... This one, not so much. Robert Rodriquez swung for the fences with this one and it missed. Some people will never ever say anything bad about the guy and some will genuinely like it, but to be honest.. it just didn't have that X factor the first Machete did. This time around Machete is more like a super hero. He is sent on a mission to Mexico by the President (excellent choice of casting Charlie Sheen, using his birth name of Carlos Esteves). But other than that, (and of course Danny Trejo and Michelle Rodriquez), the rest of the cast just didn't fit. The schizo Mexican revolutionary didn't fit, Cuba was completely out of place, wasn't really feeling Lady Gaga or Amber Heard (even though she is gorgeous) and the gorgeous Sophia Vegara was just a little too manic. But it really wasn't that.. the film just was kind of flat, even the action scenes weren't clicking. Maybe because they gave away too much in the previews. Maybe its because they made Machete inhuman.. All I know is that when I was in the theater, 3 people around me fell asleep and 4 people walked out a hour after the film started... AND it wasn't that many people in the theater. Gosh I wanted it to be so much better.. This is a rental, at best… Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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6
TVJerryOct 17, 2013
Danny Trejo is back as the grizzled tough guy, out to save the US from several crazed maniacs. Director Robert Rodriguez has returned to grindhouse territory with over-the-top violence, hot women and cheesy special effects. His script is tooDanny Trejo is back as the grizzled tough guy, out to save the US from several crazed maniacs. Director Robert Rodriguez has returned to grindhouse territory with over-the-top violence, hot women and cheesy special effects. His script is too often talky and the dialogue isn't that clever. Some of the action is inventive, while a lot of it is just noisy. The star-chocked cast doesn't go far enough into camp (again, blame the writing). When this movie is good, it's loads of fun, but it's not as outrageous or inspired as the genre demands. NOTE: Stay thru the credits for 2 outtakes.… Expand
2 of 3 users found this helpful21
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4
Movie1997Oct 13, 2013
For a movie like this, it's all just based off of this joke. If you're into the joke, then you'll absolutely love this movie. But if you're not, then you'll completely hate "Machete Kills". Overall, while it's suppose to pull off this cheesyFor a movie like this, it's all just based off of this joke. If you're into the joke, then you'll absolutely love this movie. But if you're not, then you'll completely hate "Machete Kills". Overall, while it's suppose to pull off this cheesy old look, it's still not that good of a movie. Be sure to check out my YouTube channel "TheMovieManLife" for all things movies.… Expand
1 of 2 users found this helpful11
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5
analogkid280Oct 11, 2013
Machete suffers from too many co-stars and drags on and on. It also ends abruptly. There are a few things I would of done differently in the editing room too. Enough hate though, this movie does have some good qualities. One of them isMachete suffers from too many co-stars and drags on and on. It also ends abruptly. There are a few things I would of done differently in the editing room too. Enough hate though, this movie does have some good qualities. One of them is Charlie Sheen (Estevez!) as the president of the free world. Of course Machete is the front man for this ensemble of characters that keeps the movie flying along at a roadrunners pace. I liked the first one a lot!!!! This one was entertaining as grind-house cinema but not much more.… Expand
3 of 8 users found this helpful35
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4
Jim222001Apr 14, 2015
Robert Rodriguez's imagination and sense of humor is at full speed which is what holds Machete Kills back from being good. He's usually good at making B movies that poke fun at themselves but here B, stands for bad. Machete Kills is over theRobert Rodriguez's imagination and sense of humor is at full speed which is what holds Machete Kills back from being good. He's usually good at making B movies that poke fun at themselves but here B, stands for bad. Machete Kills is over the top goofy throughout. Even a kooky Mel Gibson with a Mad Max tribute scene can't save it.… Expand
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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4
RealMuthaFNov 4, 2014
The whole Machete thing has always been a joke. When the fake trailer appeared in the Grindhouse, it was a funny one. Then it got out of hand. The first movie was pretty watchable, but the joke was starting to get overused, you can't make aThe whole Machete thing has always been a joke. When the fake trailer appeared in the Grindhouse, it was a funny one. Then it got out of hand. The first movie was pretty watchable, but the joke was starting to get overused, you can't make a good movie out of a single gag (or at least Rodriguez can't). This time, the sequel has come very close to the line that separates a crappy movie from a mediocre one. Utter senselessness, poor visual effects, cheesy acting and stupid forced dialogues just don't go unnoticed.
Who pulls this from the depths of awfulness are Michelle Rodriguez (she's hot), Amber Heard (she's even hotter), Mel Gibson (it's a shame he's had a blow to his reputation, he's still same ol' awesome Mel) and Charlie Sheen (because any movie gets better with jokes about Charlie Sheen and hookers or drugs).
So, Machete Kills is barely watchable and gets a very weak 4 out of 10, which is actually 3.5 rounded to 4, something like that. And considering the open nods to an even more ridiculous sequel set in space, things will get worse.… Expand
0 of 0 users found this helpful00
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4
moonman1994May 19, 2015
Although certainly entertaining Machete Kills is so ridiculous that it ends up not being a good movie. The deaths are fun the action is fun and luckily the film doesn't take itself seriously but simply not taking itself seriously doesn't makeAlthough certainly entertaining Machete Kills is so ridiculous that it ends up not being a good movie. The deaths are fun the action is fun and luckily the film doesn't take itself seriously but simply not taking itself seriously doesn't make it good. Some of the characters are too irritating for too long and overshadow the action. But hey if you're looking to watch a film with a lot of cool gory deaths this movie is for you. If you're looking for anything else then not so much.… Expand
0 of 0 users found this helpful00
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5
StaticSpineJan 10, 2014
In my opinion this is a really unnecessary sequel with a huge cliffhanger to another unnecessary sequel. The first Machete had some noncence in it, but it actually had some story behind that. Machete Kills seems like nonsence for the sake ofIn my opinion this is a really unnecessary sequel with a huge cliffhanger to another unnecessary sequel. The first Machete had some noncence in it, but it actually had some story behind that. Machete Kills seems like nonsence for the sake of noncesnce and nothing more. There are some cool moments, but overall I didn't really like it.… Expand
0 of 0 users found this helpful00
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4
marcmyworksJan 22, 2014
While there are a myriad of characters, explosions, celebrity cameos and violence this film is far too simple and dumb to be that interesting. Only the promise of a sequel set in space makes this worth a watch and even then as it seems lessWhile there are a myriad of characters, explosions, celebrity cameos and violence this film is far too simple and dumb to be that interesting. Only the promise of a sequel set in space makes this worth a watch and even then as it seems less grindhouse and more spoof.… Expand
0 of 0 users found this helpful00
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5
jraz81Dec 29, 2013
Not as good as the original, but worth seeing if you liked the first one. Notable for the jokes far more than the action sequences. Charlie Sheen is a hoot as the president.
0 of 0 users found this helpful00
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4
chwAug 21, 2014
I really should have seen the first Machete before I saw this, because after I watched all of this, I didn't want to watch any Robert Rodriguez movies at all (unless it was Sin City, Sin City is so badass).
0 of 0 users found this helpful00
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6
DevilmathSep 27, 2015
Isador Cortez, a.k.a. Machete, always had Danny Trejo’s face since his first cameo in Robert Rodriguez’s "Spy Kids" (2001), and has always been portrayed as an over-the-top caricature of the infallible action hero. His first sporadicIsador Cortez, a.k.a. Machete, always had Danny Trejo’s face since his first cameo in Robert Rodriguez’s "Spy Kids" (2001), and has always been portrayed as an over-the-top caricature of the infallible action hero. His first sporadic appearances in different films were intended as Easter eggs and nod to the fans: the best known reference of all is the fake trailer included in "Grindhouse" (2007), by Tarantino and Rodriguez himself. It took Quentin’s genius (but most of all his reputation) to raise the funds for a project that had been their forbidden desire for a long time: a so called “b-movie”, a low-budget exploitation film as in fashion in the ‘70s. Rodriguez jumped at the chance to give depth and notoriety to Machete, laying the foundations for what would later become the 2010 feature “Machete”, a critical, public and box office success.
Former Mexican Federal Machete is a living legend, a die-hard incorruptible law man, whose face is scarred by violence and whose soul is scarred by death and suffering. Armed with his inseparable and lethal machete, he is the perfect war machine that every villain fears but invariably tries (and fails) to kill. This time, his nemesis is Luther Voz (Mel Gibson), orchestrating an intricate plan to threaten humanity. Machete, personally hired by the funkiest President of the United States ever (a brilliant Carlos Estevez, a.k.a. Charlie Sheen, typecasted straight from his previous roles in the “Scary Movie” saga), must travel across Central America to save the day. Alongside him, a number of disreputable characters follow one another while the plot unfolds. Enter hot secret agent Miss San Antonio, Vanessa Hudgens playing the prostitute, Mendez the Madman and his split personality, his bodyguard, corrupt Sheriff Doakes, Shè coming back with a bunch of guys from the previous film - and then this hitman, el Camaleòn, who is actually four different people! Seriously? That’s way too many characters for me to care about, especially given the standard of the film, in which everything is a farce built for Machete to destroy - while possibly maiming some limbs.
Away from the dusty and western-like setting of the first chapter, Rodriguez shapes "Machete Kills" in a way that reminds me a bit of James Bond, and too much of "Expendables". Rather unfortunate, for a film that tries hard to be cool, but ends up looking like any other average action feature. It is this strange ambivalence that makes "Machete Kills" hard to appreciate fully: a few scenes are memorable, and some are pure works of genius, but the uniqueness of a character like Machete is game-changing, and it soon becomes clear that he doesn’t fit the genre’s standards. His invincibile and illogic nature is the elephant in the room that makes everything else pointless. “Machete Kills” attracts its audience with promises of absurdities, silliness, and gratuitous gore; all this aside, it feels just like a 2-hour long cartoon, or an ice cream with a dozen scoops. After a while, you just get tired. That’s not to say that the film isn’t worth the ticket price: when written wisely, its episodic gags make the whole cinema laugh out loud, and the fake trailer for "Machete Kills Again... In Space" is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in the last ten years. This is why Machete remains one of the cult icons of modern cinema, and just as I am ready to point out all the film’s weaknesses, I’m also impatiently waiting for the next sequel.… Expand
0 of 0 users found this helpful00
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