Steve Persall

Burlesque is what happens when an irresistible sex object like Aguilera meets Cher's immovable upper lip. It isn't always pretty but on occasion it's guiltily pleasurable.

Part 1 of Harry Potter's long goodbye is technically impressive as usual, especially an animated shadow play explaining the whole Deathly Hallows myth.

The cast is delightful top to bottom, although Arterton's role is chiefly defined by seductive smiles and the rise of her cut-off shorts. Allam and Cooper are standouts, creating hormonally despicable characters getting more of Tamara's attention than they deserve.

The Voyage of the Dawn Treader ends on a perfectly appropriate note, recapturing a childish sense of wonder and an earnest approach to Lewis' religious allegory.

The Tourist is less likely to be remembered for its cat-and-mouse machinations than for the beautiful people carrying them out.

It's gory and gut-wrenching but strangely life-affirming.

Liman handles the spy stuff with Bourne-again flair, especially the opener when Valerie proves her mettle during an assignment to secure a snitch.

Paul Haggis is positive that withholding information while John makes "A Beautiful Mind" flow charts and deals with bad dudes will keep it interesting. Haggis is wrong.

Only a spunky cast prevents the film from being as tedious as a test pattern.

For Colored Girls is blessed with a Murderer's Row of black female actors, each tearing ferociously into Shange's words and gamely hanging on through Perry's.

For the initiated, however, Alfredson weaves a tidy web from loose ends left dangling.

If only one character in Stone reacted as someone in his position would to the preposterous situation at hand, the movie would be 15 minutes long.

Imagination is the key element that Conviction lacks.

Hereafter doesn't feel like a Clint Eastwood film; it's more like a very special edition of John Edward's psychic TV show.

Salt is a movie constantly painting itself into corners then tromping out with arbitrary twists and action distractions.

The saga of North should appeal to anyone who was ever grounded or felt unappreciated by their parents. [22 Jul 1994, p.6]

There is some glint of acting potential in Farley's puffy face, but this movie doesn't mine it. Director Penelope Spheeris was well prepared for the maturity level here, after she directed The Little Rascals last year, yet seems content to place Farley and Spade in the same situations she crafted in Wayne's World. Farley would be wise to be more selective in his career, or else he'll wind up as a comic prop in insurance commercials. [4 Feb 1996, p.2B]

Yes, this is a great time for escapism at the movies. But there's a point at which escapism throws what we're trying to forget back in our faces.

Somewhere, Wes Craven is laughing up his sleeve, and Robert Englund is grinning. It's nice to know that you're irreplaceable.

Director Ted Demme (Jonathan's nephew, Who's the Man?) guides this predictable action with a leaden hand. It's as if he, like everyone else in The Ref, is holding back, awaiting Leary's next inspired, caustic riff. That's a lot of pressure for a cult-level comic in his first lead role. He doesn't always measure up. [11 Mar 1994, p.8]

There's no way to make this a feel-good movie, and admirably the Duplass brothers don't try. Cyrus finds its humor in dark places, through characters bringing out the worst in each other.

Underwood's film doesn't have a fraction of the insight or genuine comedy of City Slickers and it's a few years too late to be fresh material. Overall, Heart and Souls is an odd title for a movie that has a distinct, depressing lack of both qualities. [13 Aug 1993]

No other movie has so masterfully conveyed the folly of nuclear warfare, or poked such savage fun at a military that wages it. Stanley Kubrick's coal-black comedy has a timeless quality that will probably extend beyond disarmament. [6 Aug 1995, p.2B]

If anyone gets a career boost from The Expendables it will be Dolph Lundgren, playing a drug-addicted loose Howitzer booted from the team and flipping to the bad side.

What's fun is how the new Karate Kid embraces and vastly improves the cliches, keeping the plot cleverly updated for a generation that never heard of Ralph Macchio.

Steve Carell's character in Dinner for Schmucks is almost too pitiful for the jokes launched against him to be funny. It is a terrific performance making everyone else's condescension sound harsher than the writers likely intended.

Screenwriter Bert V. Royal takes the oldest adolescence hook in the book - losing one's virginity- and turns it inside out.

The movie is geared to preschoolers, so only parents dragged with them may complain. There's only that Looney Tunes overture to savor before the Acme production begins.

Cohen and Pogue never get a firm grip on how they wish to play this movie. Myth or mirth? Terror or tease? Draco's fire-breathing aim is mercifully off the mark when buzz-bombing villages, but microwave-sharp when it comes to heating dinner. [31 May 1996, p.3]

The Last Airbender makes the cartoon version with its ratchet-jawed characters and clunky animation seem like a Pixar classic.

John Frankenheimer weaves a tidy sense of dread until he reveals what should scare us in The Island of Dr. Moreau. Then the movie degenerates into the equivalent of a roadshow tour of Cats gone horribly wrong. [23 Aug 1996, p.8]

Return To The Blue Lagoon is as pretty as a travel brochure and just as thin on substance and entertainment value. [02 Aug 1991, p.13]

Good performances and flashes of goose-bump-raising wit, but one is left wondering what all the fuss was about. [16 Sep 1994, p.12]

Many actors would focus their energies only on Arnie's tics, but DiCaprio aims for his soul. We could either laugh at Arnie or pity him, but DiCaprio makes us love him. [4 Mar 1994, p.5]

I seriously doubt that it happened this way, with such convenient strife and truncated solutions. The movie is about baseball but plays like T-ball, with each situation teed up for easy swings.

Cool Runnings is enormously unfaithful to its subject, piling on one sports cliche after another with shallow characterizations...Regardless of those faults, Cool Runnings has an agreeable goofiness to it that brushes aside any picky complaints. It isn't art, but it surely is disposable fun. [1 Oct 1993, p.6B]

Maverick has everything going for it except a sense of cinematic adventure and a stopwatch. [20 May 1994, p.6]

Multiplicity is a pleasant comedy, in the blandest sense of that adjective. It's what you call a billboard movie - a quick-pitch concept easily advertised with snappy star images, flat in its execution and merely a passing distraction to an audience. [17 July 1996, p.3D]

Eastwood keeps the tension humming from his director's chair and contributes a little too much comic relief, but gives Costner an eye-opening, image-shattering showcase that adds a sheen to his often-criticized acting career. [24 Nov 1993, p.6B]

More than any other Disney delight, The Lion King involves our full emotions; we're biting fingernails one minute and laughing the next at characters who deserve their spots on toy store shelves. [24 June 1994, p.6]

The greatest animated film of all time...one of the truly monumental cinematic accomplishments of all time. Each frame was lovingly hand-drawn, rather than the stylized mechanics of computer animation that brought back the art form in The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast and Aladdin. The effect is astounding, especially when the animators' attention to detail and four years of painstaking effort is considered. I'm not ashamed to admit that at a recent screening - right around the sound of the first "Heigh Ho" - I wept, awed by the artistry and savoring a rich historical and emotional experience. [2 July 1993, p.8]

Even as Touching Home finds those moments, it's easier to appreciate the stars' dedication to a grass roots project than the project itself.

To paraphrase Joe Bob: Heads roll, arms roll, a face gets squashed like an overripe papaya, about 15 gallons of blood, several gratuitous shots of nekkid women, and plenty of beasts - including the Cryptkeeper, who bookends the flick with his usual pun-laden flair. Joe Bob might say check it out, then feel sorry he did. [13 Jan 1995, p.8C]

Reiner, O'Malley and a cast schooled in the Leslie Nielsen academy of deadpan hilarity make Fatal Instinct more fun than it has a right to be, without pretensions or dependency on past glories. [30 Oct 1993, p.5B]

Toy Story 3 isn't merely the best movie of the summer -- even with summer just kicking in -- but an immediate candidate for best of the year.

The new, vastly improved Star Trek moves at warp speed through a marvelously reinvented sci-fi franchise, reverent to the past and firmly entrenched in the now.

This is a remarkable film for more reasons than its antihero, from the cyberspeed wisdom of Aaron Sorkin's screenplay to Jeff Cronenweth's camera prowling the excesses of youthful genius gone wild.

My Cousin Vinny is a mildly entertaining courtroom comedy that ultimately must be judged guilty of disappointment. Lynn and Launer's pop-movie mentality wastes a great idea and some terrific performances. [13 Mar 1992, p.10]

This is how a romantic vampire flick should work.

Although it's based on true incidents, Mulholland Falls never seems grounded in any semblance of realism. It's a theme park stageshow gone horribly wrong, with spasms of ultra-violence that distract us from the so-called mystery at hand, but never help us ignore those darn hats. [26 Apr 1996, p.3]

I honestly thought Eclipse would be different, after "New Moon" showed stirrings of cinematic life.

A memorable doomsday drama. [28 Sep 2000, p.13W]

The Runaways isn't just about rock 'n' roll; it IS rock 'n' roll, as loud, sexy, sometimes sloppy and ultimately exhilarating as the music can be.

Directors Pierre Coffin and Chris Renaud craft a fun stretch run, wrapping the story with warm, fuzzy funnies and nothing to suggest a sequel, which is probably wise.

Disney always invites its artists to give a character tics that match the actor, but Warner Bros. didn't take that extra step toward quality. That's the difference between doing whatever it takes to get the job done properly, and simply doing as much as you can afford. [15 May 1998, p.3]

It's a welcome chance to learn more about Lisbeth Salander, the kinky, punk hacker and pop culture phenom played by Noomi Rapace.

It only took one sequel for 3 Ninjas to learn what four mutant turtles discovered the third time around: The best way to liven a dull, repetitive premise is to take it on the road. [06 May 1994, p.6]

This movie is a last chance to save the series, which it does.

Nick Cassavetes, like his father, works out his movies through the instincts of the actors, not the camera lens. It's a fitting, and occasionally fitful, eulogy to an unheralded legend. [29 Aug 1997, p.3]

Safe is the operative word here, since One Fine Day wouldn't think of messing with its casting chemistry to take any comedic risks. Clooney is as benign here as he was dangerous in From Dusk Til Dawn. Somewhere in the middle, I bet he'll make a terrific Batman next summer. [20 Dec 1996, p.10]

Hoop Dreams is what sportwriters would call "the total package:" intimate and illuminating in its depiction of two Chicago high-school basketball players and their goals, while never allowing an audience to forget that these boys and the families who support their struggles are part of the American fabric which hasn't received its due. [13Jan 1995, p.6]

The mortal in me is increasingly certain I'll never live to see cinema's most astounding achievements. The kid in me is happy to be alive right now. [13 Apr 1996, p.5]

Nobody can disagree that Waiting for Superman deals with a subject demanding attention. But it paints the engulfing problems of U.S. education with a brush too broad and samples too small to be definitive.

As wild as Medak wants it to be, Romeo is Bleeding isn't startling or - with the hellcat exception of Mona Demarkov - especially original. Even a fresh movie genre with an urgent title like New Violence can inspire some filmmakers to deliver the same old thing. [25 Feb 1994, p.6]

Whatever Career Girls lacks in polish or ambition, it compensates with three memorable performances and an unwavering filmmaker working on nobody's terms except his own. [5 Sep. 1997, p.3]

Guilt and obsession combine to create the most personally revealing effort of his career. [Restored version; 13 Dec 1996, p.5]

Mother and Child is depressively interesting, with characters constantly ruining their best chances at happiness.

The makers of Jingle All the Way have the nerve to declare what the rest of us have only grumbled about: that the superficial reason for the Christmas season is found nestled in your wallet. Schwarzenegger's ho-ho heroics should have moviegoers gladly tapping into that source into the new year. [22 Nov 1996, p.3]

It all comes down to what Francis Fitzpatrick considers the division of life: those people who are miserable and those who are dissatisfied. She's the One has enough fine moments to keep an audience out of the first category. Fans of Burns' first film will fit squarely in the second.

Director/co-writer Miller and terrific performances make Lorenzo's Oil one of the don't-miss movies of the year. [22 Jan 1993, p.5]

It may overwhelm and confuse, until you start tracing the mesmerizing route Ward lays out for his audience. [14 May 1993, p.6]

Apted is a gifted British director with a keen eye for the way American subcultures live. But in Thunderheart he allows the hunt for a big box office cop smash to interfere with a cross-cultural tale that could stand on its own. [3 Apr 1992, p.9]

Like The Flintstones and The Beverly Hillbillies before it, The Brady Bunch Movie is an amusing facsimile of a pop culture archetype. If only the script had been given such attention to detail. [17 Feb 1995, p.3]

Pierce Brosnan is dashing and deadly, finally meeting the gold standard. And director Lee Tamahori detours from convention, taking the franchise up a notch in Die Another Day.

As far as Sabrina goes...may she rest in peace for at least another 41 years. [15 Dec 1995, p.7]

After years of watching Hollywood portray mentally disturbed people as either psychopaths or cuddly idiots, it's refreshing to see what Figgis and screenwriters Eric Roth and Michael Cristofer have done with Mr. Jones. Some of the old cliches rise up now and then - beginning with the casting of heroic Richard Gere in the title role - but Mr. Jones mostly maintains respect for its audience and its subject. [8 Oct 1993, p.7]

Surprisingly, you won't find a more laugh-filled source of entertainment in theaters in any galaxy right now. [23 July 1993, p.8]

Love Affair is a second honeymoon disguised as a movie project. [21 Oct 1994, p.7]

Mike Myers' first film excursion beyond Wayne's World feels like one of those boring, aimless Saturday Night Live sketches that typically ruin the final 10 minutes of each show. So I Married an Axe Murderer is a mess, from its cliched mistaken-identity premise to one-liners that sound "borrowed" from other comedians or school-yard jive sessions. Above all, this tedious comedy proves that, as a movie star, Myers should never be let out of that basement in Aurora, Ill., that he shares with Dana Carvey. [30 July 1993, p.11]

The movie grabbed me and wouldn't let go during a bravura set piece at a soccer game when Campanella's camera glides into the stadium, finds Benjamin's face in the crowd and doesn't stop moving (with only a couple of edits) for six breathtaking minutes.

A comedy that moves as slow and uncertain as a bill through Congress. [07 May 1993, p.8]

Eat Drink Man Woman cleverly leaps between the two generations, with a wise sense of humor that illuminates the security and restrictions of the ties that bind. [02 Sep 1994, p.6]

Is Carrey funny? Of course, because Stiller and the script allow him to be funny, at the expense of tension. [14 June 1996, p.3]

Wolverine is a solid start to the ever-lengthening summer movie season, when all that matters is the bang and the bucks paid for it.

The latest incarnation of Bob Kane's classic comic book creation shares the same angular, menacing animation style of the Fox TV Network afternoon series that inspired it. [25 Dec 1993, p.7B]

As far as unnecessary movies go, Predators is a pip.

Superbly directed by John Huston and acted with extraordinary charisma by Caine and Sean Connery. [14 Mar 2002, p.19W]

Coco Chanel & Igor Stravinsky is an elegant scandal almost devoid of true passion, no matter how many times the nude lovers artfully mingle.

Just like Will Stoneman himself, it crosses the finish line battered and wobbly, but a winner nonetheless. [14 Jan 1994, p.7]

Last Man Standing can't live up to its Japanese and Italian predecessors or even its title. [20 Sep 1996, p.5]

Kids isn't a cure, it's a symptom of mercenary moviemaking. Some will call it heroic, but that's just a smug synonym for exploitation. [25 Aug 1995, p.9]

With its flat acting and titillating format, The Lover is soft-core and mostly a bore. [14 May 1993, p.9]

What Bay has really done is slice Beverly Hills Cop in two; Eddie Murphy's sandpaper personality in Lawrence and his silky style in Smith. [7 April 1995, p.7]

Will Forte plays his pitifully deluded creation to the hilt in a penknife movie. There's a lot of material here that only occasionally succeeds on Forte's insanely focused performance.

Pig in the City is a blatant, heartless attempt to turn a surprise hit into a cash cow. That simply won't do, pig. [25 Nov 1998, p.1D]

Director Barbet Schroeder (Single White Female) has the proper foreboding drive in his technique to make every minute of his movie hum with fascinating dread. [21 Apr 1995, p.2B]

Not as funny as you might expect but, like Reitman's political comedy Dave, it has a genuine affection for its institutional subject. [23 Nov 1994, p.8C]

Shore's new "comedy" Son-In-Law proves without question that this MTV maniac is one of the most tedious one-note performers in any branch of show business today. Considering that his brain-addled manner serves as a role model for many teenagers is more offensive than his lack of talent. [2 July 1993, p.9]

There are a few typos in The Paper, but they're honest - and honestly funny - mistakes. [25 March 1994, p.5]

Ghost in the Machine doesn't possess the funky, laugh-at-me mentality of good trash, or the good sense to know when its half-baked storyline is getting old. [30 Dec 1993, p.10B]

Paramount prefers to think of Star Trek: Generations as the first of a new film series, rather than the seventh act of the old, but prior knowledge of the saga definitely is a necessity. It's a movie filled with punchlines that depend on the audience knowing the set-ups. [18 Nov. 1994, p.3]

Foster's manipulation of Nell's strange language holds us in rapt attention and empathy until Apted falsely gooses his film. It's an excellent performance slightly cheapened by the filmmaker's dramatic framing. [23 Dec 1994, p.17]

Fonda's comedy instincts are in top form as a herpetologist duped by a con artist (Barbara Stanwyck) in a screwball comedy from director Preston Sturges. A vintage example of pratfalling into love. [16 May 2002, p.11W]

Director Stephen Herek (Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure) and screenwriter Steve Brill dreamed up these fantasies for their so-called comedy about youth hockey. They could have devoted more attention to writing decent jokes. This childish mix of slap shots and slapstick lumbers along as awkwardly as a skater on a melting ice rink. [02 Oct 1992, p.12]

The harrowing scenes of Stahl's drug abuse and strung-out aftermaths are dulled by Stiller's quips, while the laughs stick in our throats because of sheer embarrassment for Stahl's character. By trying to have it both ways, Veloz does full service to neither. [09 Oct 1998, p.8]

That epilogue suspiciously looks tacked-on by Warner Bros., who did the same thing with Roberts in The Pelican Brief when the climax was too downbeat. Just one more anti-climactic chance to see Roberts flash that halogen-bulb smile, even though it thoroughly contradicts what preceded it. It leaves a bad taste, and one realizes that it's the same old tainted salmon Hollywood has been serving for years. Somewhere, Thelma and Louise are gagging. [4 Aug 1995, p.8]

Lawrence is in every scene of Winter's Bone, leaving her plenty of opportunity to make false moves. I dare you to find one, in a performance to be remembered during awards season.

What Sirens does have is a refreshingly uninhibited attitude toward sex and the human body, tastefully embodied by supermodel Elle MacPherson and others. Sirens is consistently enjoyable, but one-sided political views, live-action pictorials and feathery jokes make it no better than a decent issue of Playboy - eye-catching and ultimately disposable. [29 March 1994, p.6B]

Until it lapses into a Rube Goldberg farce with a tacked-on, present-day epilogue, the movie is a wonderful reminder of why we've tried so hard to get major league baseball in Tampa Bay. [7 Apr 1993, p.5B]

It's silly, derivative and too wacky for its own narrative good; traits that the director and Proft wear like a Congressional Medal of Honor. But it's also the funniest 86 minutes I've spent in a movie theater since, well, Hot Shots! Anybody else ready for Part Trois?

Leslie Harris wrote and directed this special jury prize winner at the 1993 Sundance Film Festival, which often slips into Afternoon Special territory with its story of teen pregnancy. What keeps it buoyant and engaging is a remarkable performance by newcomer Ariyan Johnson as Chantel, whose hip, flippant moods mask an ambitious, bright mind. [18 Jun 1993, p.10]

The movie is airy, predictable and ultimately inconsequential. Yet, there are moments in She's All That when the filmmakers create something close to artfulness, a rare trait in a teen-dream movie. It's a minor, reassuring cure for those Varsity Blues. [29 Jan 1999]

I'm Still Here is amateurishly shot and edited, as if ineptness equaled some higher level of veracity. Ironically, it's the only Joaquin Phoenix movie anyone has cared about in years.

The reclamation project that Ben Affleck calls a career continues with The Town, his second directing effort that would impress more if the first try weren't so terrific and visually similar.

The only bright spot in Tomorrow Never Dies is watching Chinese action star Michelle Yeoh eventually get a chance to grab a couple of machine guns and start rocking the house. She's a dynamo who has held her own alongside Jackie Chan, so it's disappointing that Spottiswoode doesn't find more opportunities to let her kick some tail. [19 Dec 1997, p.8]

One can forgive the threadbare script and Edwards' pedestrian direction for those scenes when Benigni shakes, stutters and stumbles through the lovely French scenery. [30 Aug 1993, p.6B]

Energetic performances plug plot holes and the most interesting villains die first, but Surviving the Game is a decent fix for action junkies before the summer blockbusters arrive. [20 Apr 1994, p.6B]

It's an amusing geriatric uprising that might just as well be titled "Gray."

First Knight isn't sparkling enough to be a legend, isn't grubby enough for realistic drama or bad enough to completely dismiss. Call it a near-myth. [07 Jul 1995, p.6]

Whatever she lacks in filmmaking expertise or originality is balanced by an unadorned sincerity in the melodrama she chose for a debut. Down in the Delta isn't a great movie, but it constantly touches your heart and involves you with its characters. [25 Dec 1998, p.5]

The cinema grew up when Penn crafted this movie. Beatty was never better playing boyish insecurity while Faye Dunaway was a smoldering newcomer. Essential viewing for film lovers. [27 Sept 2001, p.14W]

It's the Topps style of filmmaking; like most baseball trading cards, Little Big League is flatly two-dimensional, distinctly lacking action and with little value, unless its engaging young star, Luke Edwards, turns out to have a brilliant career. [24 Jun 1994, p.9]

The A-Team is literally a blast, from the opening credits containing more thrills than the average shoot-'em-up (and more laughs than some comedies), to a climactic orgy of CGI destruction.

Donaldson mimics the original shot-for-shot in some sequences, adding sordid violence that would have been too extreme even for Peckinpah. What's needed is a fast Getaway. This is merely Donaldson, Hill and glamorous stars spinning their wheels. [11 Feb 1994, p.6B]

It can get a bit redundant but always remains interesting, as young lives take shape on an asphalt oval.

Anything goes in The Big Lebowski, and you roll right along with it. [6 March 1998, p.3]

It isn't a movie to embrace (except for Leguizamo's brilliance) but it deserves one of Noxeema's air kisses - a passing, passionless show of affection, and then we're off to the next party. [08 Sep 1995, p.8]

An offbeat romance as dysfunctional as its lovers. [17 Feb 1993, p.5B]

Director Alphonso Arau directs this adaptation of the Laura Esquivel novel with a light touch, even in the film's most bizarre twists and passionate turns. [07 May 1993, p.8]

Now and Then is much better when Hoffman, Ricci, Birch and Aston Moore draw us into their clique, with all their worldly poses and brittle facades. [20 Oct 1995, p.12]

Another Stakeout eventually crumbles under the weight of its own stupidity. Badham and Kouf are compelled to shove the comedy aside for an overly violent shootout finish that leaves as many bodies as unanswered questions about the case. An overblown pyrotechnic sequence that destroys a house from a handful of angles is too familiar to be exciting. [23 July 1993, p.9]

Eat Pray Love is like one of those rich dishes Liz consumes in Italy; robustly flavored and guiltily pleasurable.

The Substitute is loud, dumb and sort of fun, but it'll be best viewed on your neighbor's cable TV, so you don't have to pay the bill. [19 Apr 1996, p.2B]

Wright is an insanely funny filmmaker (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz) yet only the front half of that description carries over to Scott Pilgrim vs. the World.

Jungle 2 Jungle is a culture-clash comedy based upon a French film that was roundly panned when it flopped upon our shores last year. Dumb plot. Dumb jokes. The usual. [07 Mar 1997, p.08]

None of these complaints would matter if The Bounty Hunter possessed even a smidgen of inspired comedy. It doesn't.

Even when I.Q. turns to mush, it's appealing mush. Robbins has never been so downright adorable on screen; befuddlement becomes him. Ryan looks a few years too old for such an ingenue role, but few female actors have such an immediate bond with an audience. [25 Dec 1994, p.14C]

Restrepo is about soldiers, not politics. The question of whether U.S. troops belong there isn't posed. Their devotion to duty and each other is unquestioned.

One of the year's best documentaries.

Without previous knowledge of Andy Diggle's comics, The Losers looks like every other globetrotting gunpowder flick in which good guy bullets never miss and bad guy bullets never hit their targets.

Toy Story fully understands the limitless potential of childish fantasy, and the computer animation style fashions dreams into a glossy, fantastic reality. [24 nov 1995, p.3]

You don't need to watch National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon I to understand what a sloppy comedy concoction it is; just listen. What you won't hear is laughter, even in a crowded movie theater. I haven't experienced such a silent audience for an alleged comedy since last year's horrid Stop, Or My Mom Will Shoot.

The appeal of The Rugrats Movie sits squarely on the shoulders of its vast cast of characters, each of whom has one characteristic, but collectively sketch an amusing perspective of childhood. [20 Nov 1998, p.3]

A distinct lack of merriment marks each frame of this film, with Scott determined to erase all fond memories of past Robin Hoods.

The movie is unambitious and sweet and nothing more. Precisely what we expect from producer-director Ivan Reitman these days, after good-natured audacity got his career started with hits like Animal House and Stripes. [9 May 1997, p.5]

Richie Rich is a movie fashioned with dollars, not sense. [21 Dec 1994, p.8C]

Gang Related isn't perfect; the plot does get a bit far-fetched at times, bordering on ironic overkill, and the last 10 minutes of bloody revenge is needlessly out-of-synch with the rest of the movie. You walk away from Kouf's movie not entirely happy about what it turned out to be, but overjoyed at what it is not. Sometimes, that's good enough.

Whatever laughter Lottery Ticket earns is through familiarity with these exaggerated characters, and actors going the extra mile to make viewers believe they haven't seen this material before.

After a lucrative career of bashing well-made scary, epic, disaster and date movies, Friedberg and Seltzer have a source begging to be mocked.

Striking Distance is the kind of movie that Last Action Hero wanted to be: an outrageous cop-movie spoof with equally gratuitous parts of dumbness and decibels. The problem is that, unlike his Planet Hollywood partner Ah-nold, Bruce Willis doesn't seem to know that he's goofing on himself. [17 Sept 1993, p.7B]

Man Bites Dog is a strange, undeniably powerful hybrid of Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer and This is Spinal Tap; a jaw-dropper that takes your breath away with its scabrous mayhem, then replaces it with an uneasy chuckle. [5 Nov 1993, p.7]

Carlito's Way isn't a bad movie, just one that could be much better with more of the subversiveness that Pacino and De Palma wrought in Scarface. [12 Nov 1993, p.8]

Stephen Fry's elegantly wry performance as Wilde ranks among the best acting of the year so far, elevating what could be a simple impersonation into the embodiment of a person too smart for his surroundings and too tempted by the ways of the flesh. [26 Jun 1998, p.10]

Any movie that features a dramatic actor like Kurt Russell playing straight man to a goofball like Martin Short already is sailing on choppy waters. Toss in a script that leaves no cliche unturned and the result is Captain Ron, a seafaring comedy that keeps its creativity in dry dock. [18 Sep 1992, p.8]

Fallen begins in unremarkable fashion and trails off from there, idling its way through bland psycho-religious violence and spooky lighting. [16 Jan 1998, p.8]

Turner cuts a hilarious swath across the screen in a courageously over-the-top performance that perfectly fits Waters' twisted vision. [15 Apr 1994, p.6]

The biggest target, however, is O'Neal, whose monotone and slurred lines deaden each scene in which he speaks. He's trying so clumsily to do this acting gig right and keeps tripping over his size-22 feet by absurdly wiggling his eyebrows or forcing a joke. You get the impression that he doesn't know what his lines mean. Finally, we realize that acting is just one more thing that O'Neal can't do as well as Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. [15 Aug 1997, p.6]

School Ties is a completely satisfying entertainment with an authentic sense of period, characterization and compelling drama. If there is any justice in this world, this affecting tale of injustice will find a wide audience to share its magic. [18 Sept 1992, p.8]

It isn't Grant who makes Nine Months the funniest movie in months, but a supporting cast of crazies who raise the modern art of physical comedy to new heights, while Grant's character faces unexpected fatherhood. [12 July 1995, p.2B]

Dawn of the Dead is very much its own movie, and a disturbing one at that. But it also realizes we're in the theater to have fun, either grotesquely or cleverly.

The Little Rascals is marvelously quaint fun, proving that they can make 'em like they used to. Somewhere, Hal Roach is smiling, you betcha. [05 Aug 1994, p.16]

We've seen plenty of sword-and-sandal epics, full of robustly virile men fighting like real men against other men. But we've never seen those hyper-macho mechanics presented with the brutal beauty and thrilling finesse of 300, clearly the best film of 2007 so far.

Ready to Wear is a comedy - one of Altman's funniest - but it's the humor of humiliation, of the characters and the industry. [23 Dec 1994, p.16]

A shocking and outrageous comedy that gets under your skin. Landis doesn't always know the difference between a laugh and a nervous giggle, but you can't just sit there unaffected. [25 Sept 1992, p.10]

Jonah Hex isn't abrupt by design but by desperation.

Romantics of any age will probably succumb to Depp's deft portrayal, cinematographer John Schwartzman's fantastic vision and Berman's comic wordplay. [23 Apr 1993, p.5]

Addams Family Values is a rare sequel that surpasses the original, primarily for the same reason that Superman II topped the Man of Steel's first outing. This time, Sonnenfeld doesn't bury the jokes in exposition about characters we already know. [19 Nov 1993, p.7]

If only City Slickers II possessed the heart of the original, a quality it might have recouped at its climax. Yet, instead of a gentle lesson on the true value of life, the screenwriters tack on a Las Vegas epilogue that exists to present one more Palance zinger and a set-up for another sequel. [10 June 1994, p.8]

Technically dazzling but emotionally empty. [22 Oct 1993, p.5]

Disney's remake of Mighty Joe Young has little to recommend except more realistic special effects than the 1949 original and a handful of kid-sized thrills. The movie feels designed only to pass some time in a theater, without much attention to anything except building the perfect cuddly beast. [25 Dec 1998, p.8]

There hasn't been a great Muppet movie since the first one, in 1979. Muppets From Space is the most entertaining of five sequels since then, although it isn't anything special. Yet we can all appreciate the way it's packaged, with one adorably round eye on the kid market and the other focused on grown-ups buying the tickets. [14 July 1999, p.1D]

When the fadeout comes, viewers may feel as unsatisfied with the movie as these characters are with their lives.

The movie maintains its posture of mystery long after the solution is evident, and the best suggestion is to just smirk with the flow.

Stealth is a key element of tension and, even though DePalma tosses his share of fireballs around, Mission: Impossible gets edgier when it gets quieter. The audience's rapt, empathetic silence while Hunt hangs there in peril proves how well the director does it. [24 May 1996, p.5]

Forget the last hour of Pearl Harbor. LeRoy's depiction of Jimmy Doolittle's air raid has all the excitement and patriotism that Disney's publicity machine couldn't buy. [13 Sep 2001, p.13W]

A sloppy, schizophrenic effort; a rollicking parody, a somber romantic tragedy, an orgy of violence and an incomplete work on all fronts. [24 Dec 1993, p.9]

It's sad to see mercurial talent unused, and even more disheartening to see it completely wasted. Color of Night, the first film in 14 years from director Richard Rush, is a dreadful miscalculation of a comeback; a sexual thriller equally lewd and ludicrous. Rush has already disavowed the reworked version opening nationwide today, promising his original vision will be available later on video. [19 Aug 1994, p.7B]

Every decade needs a nonsensical sci-fi space oddity - a Barbarella or Buckaroo Banzai - to keep the underground element amused. Tank Girl should keep the Internet clicking for a while, with its imposing strangeness and violent pop-apocalyptic action. [1 Apr 1995, p.2B]

Wind only hits full stride during the racing sequences, filmed with stunning authenticity by cinematographer John Toll. This movie should be a shoo-in for an Oscar nomination for Toll's work. But there hasn't been such a threadbare film so dependent upon its camera work since Days of Heaven. [11 Sep 1992, p.10]

So many oddities are thrown in our faces that The Frighteners becomes measured by its occasional imaginative moments, rather than as a complete entertainment. [19 July 1996, p.5]

So-bad-it's-fun. [6 March 1992, p.5]

Casper often resembles a blueprint for the next Universal theme park ride, but it serves well as the summer's first family treat. This movie should make children happy, at least for another month, until Disney unleashes its Pocahontas punch. [26 May 1995, p.10]

The Jungle Book is rich with stunning sights and impossibly lush features. [23 Dec 1994, p.16]

A sensory and intellectual overload from start to finish, a brawny, brainy summer movie that may infuriate as many viewers as it enraptures.

Even an ear-splitting sound track of gunfire, explosions, rock 'n' roll and revving engines can't drown out one noise that should deeply disturb film fans the sound of Butch and Sundance spinning in their Bolivian graves. [27 Aug 1991, p.3D]

It's genial entertainment, packed with the sort of nonsense kids love and a family-values message parents can respect, but it simply isn't focused or funny enough to convince anyone that Culkin - or co-star Ted Danson for that matter - has the chops for lasting stardom. [17 Jun 1994, p.8]

This summer's funniest movie.

Even stock characters -- Zoe's tirelessly supportive friends and relatives -- get style points for giving jobs to old pros Klein, Linda Lavin (Alice) and "Mr. C" himself, Tom Bosley. Of course, the babies are adorable.

Brill's film isn't as offensive as it could be, nor as funny as it should be. Heavyweights is a case of no pain, and no gain, either. [19 Feb 1995, p.16C]

The plot, dealing with aliens infiltrating our world, still made as much sense as it possibly could, and the special effects guys really don't go to work until the last two reels. [31 May 1996, p.8]

Hocus Pocus is a sweet-spirited romp that could give clean-minded silliness a good name once again. [16 July 1993, p.6]

Another paper-thin premise comes back to haunt moviegoers. [5 Nov 1993, p.5]

It's as slick and fun as summertime entertainment should be. Downey is still an arresting presence, glib to the nth degree and supremely confident that he's smarter than anyone else.

Young, old, black, white or whatever: This is one Bus you can't afford to miss. [16 Oct 1996, p.1D]

Woo directs Mission: Impossible 2 cautiously, as if still introducing himself to U.S. audiences despite Face-Off and Broken Arrow. Or maybe he has nothing left to say about the poetry of violence after such visual eloquence in his Chinese classics. [24 May 2000, p.1D]

A bit dated in its feminism, making some jokes even funnier. [08 Mar 2001, p.17W]

The heist movie genre gets a hip-hop makeover in Takers, a movie loaded with as much style as ammunition.

Williams uses some interesting lighting effects and settings (including a subplot about the burgeoning heroin trade in Omaha, of all places). Yet, he has no idea of how to motivate actors or tie several scenes together with dramatic purpose to keep the movie from going belly-up. [06 Nov 1998, p.10]

Even when The Net goes off-line, Bullock's captivating presence is a screen saver. [28 July 1995, p.6]

If he made The Ghost Writer under a pseudonym, it might be roundly hailed as the classy white-knuckler it is. But it's Polanski's name above the title, with his own ghosts haunting each frame.

The IMF workings are still complex, but without Brian DePalma's artistic indulgences (Part 1) and John Woo's poetic distractions (Part 2). Abrams cuts to the chase whenever the option arises, and the results don't leave much time to question logic or motive. [4 May 2006, p.6W]

Leigh's characters merely act in a goofy and irritating fashion until their dramatic pay-off scenes. This uneven style cheats fine actors out of the chance to shade their roles rather than rely upon black-and-white emotions. [6 Mar. 1992, p.10]

Even with its faults, The Fugitive is an uncommon joyride among this summer's movies: a thriller that doesn't depend on bombs, bimbos or blue-screen effects to scare a smile onto your face. [6 Aug 1993, p.14]

Flipper is a nice movie, a safe movie for Saturday matinees, but it isn't very exciting or entertaining. [17 May 1996, p.5]

Jordan makes performing in front of a camera look as easy as everything else he has attempted in his storied life except baseball. Bugs Bunny and the gang are old pros at that. There are some genuine surprises in the special effects expertise on display. [15 Nov 1996, p.3]

More touching than daring, The Wedding Banquet is an exquisite comedy, brimming with simple human decency and more belly laughs than any comedy I've seen this year. [15 Oct 1993, p.4]

One of the family comedy treats of the season. [15 Oct 1993, p.6]

Buying a ticket to see It Could Happen to You is like purchasing a Lotto ticket with three matching numbers; you get back a little more than you paid for it, but the thrill is quickly replaced by nagging thoughts of what might have been.

2 Days in the Valley is a neatly folded piece of cinematic quirk.

Everybody's cyber-pal Ashton Kutcher is perfect casting for Killers, since the screenplay is shallow as a Tweet and the movie appears to have been shot with a Nikon point-and-click camera he plugs on TV.

A movie as slight as Fluke shouldn't be expected to draw gasps and cooing at the drop of a plot twist. [02 Jun 1995, p.9]

Strange Days - on and off screen - should be a lesson to filmmakers not to use virulent, touchy subjects for entertainment shortcuts. Bigelow has created a state-of-the-art movie machine, with all the moral and political complexity of an Etch-a-Sketch. [13 Oct 1995, p.10]

Airheads is a rock 'n' roll radio comedy in which laughs come at a very low frequency. [5 Aug 1994, p.8]

Trapped in Paradise merely settles for being a genial diversion from the holiday shopping crowds. [02 Dec 1994, p.6]

Kick-Ass is a rabid puppy of a movie, energetically bounding off the screen and into your lap, where it proceeds to chew off your face.

It's a refreshing change from run-of-the-kill horror. Nothing in Splice feels done merely for the moment -- it's to creep you out later.

Lynn takes a familiar premise and makes it a small gem for 94 minutes, if not beyond. [30 Mar 1996, p.2B]

Rapace is a magnetic presence in a far-ranging mystery requiring such a solid character to orbit around.

Knight and Day never makes sense from the opening credits. Heck, the title is only half-explained, and not as cleverly as the pun deserves. It's a movie that never gestated beyond the pitch: Glamorous stars in exotic locales, shooting and driving their way to safety through a gantlet of bad guys chasing a MacGuffin.

Simply put, Reeves doesn't seem bright enough to master all of the techno-blab he struggles to recite and pantomime in Andrew Davis' return to the thriller genre, Chain Reaction. [2 Aug 1996, p.3]

America's foremost smart aleck Dennis Miller adds grand giggles to familiar gore in Bordello of Blood. [17 August 1996, p.2B]

This is summer entertainment at its mindless, violent worst featuring plenty of squishy, crunchy sounds and sickening makeup X effects to satisfy undiscerning blood-and-guts audiences. Moviegoers looking for pacing, character development or delightful thrills must seek shelter elsewhere. [11 July 1992, p.3D]

It only took four years for New Jack Cinema to devolve into the same old cliches of the 'hood, and only 86 minutes for the first family of def comedy to blow them away. [14 Jan 1996, p.2B]

Politicians get painted with a wide brush in My Fellow Americans, a minor comedy made somewhat special by the actors who play those combative commanders-in-chief. You'll rarely see two actors do more to make a passably fun screenplay work - and appear so effortless doing it - than Jack Lemmon and James Garner in this movie. [20 Dec 1996, p.3]

But I'll admit, as Western's climactic "big game" drew to a close, the personalities and situations Shelton and Friedkin created made it tough to guess exactly how the game would end. That's high praise, considering how predictable most jock flicks are. With that kind of heads-up play, and Nolte strong in the pivot position, Blue Chips scores. [18 Feb 1994, p.7]

Nearly everything about Just Wright is just wrong.

Set It Off doesn't say anything especially original, but it says it loud and proud. [06 Nov 1996, p.1D]

Robert Altman's tantalizing, multicharacter style is considerably dumbed down in Willard Carroll's imitative Playing by Heart. [22 Jan 1999, p.3]

The Kids in the Hall might be impossible to like if they didn't pursue their constitutional right to offend with such whimsy and joy. Even in their darkest moments, the comedy doesn't seem mean-spirited, and there is a righteous undercurrent that hints the guys care about their targets more than one might think. [19 Apr 1996, p.3]

A moviegoer's reaction to Mr. Holland's Opus depends mightily on what personal baggage he/she takes into the theater. The right audience will discover that Herek's film can be a stirring, sentimental testament to educators. For more daring types, Mr. Holland's Opus may be the multiplex equivalent of a tough required class; easy to sleep through, and dismissed not a moment too soon. [19 Jan 1996, p.8]

Whatever his motivations or deeds, Gordon Gekko is a classic screen character and Douglas is never better than when playing him.

Solid work from an actor long thought incapable of as much. [6 Dec 1996, p.5]

Hands down and body parts floating, the most irresistibly sick movie in years is Piranha 3D, which should be retitled Piranha 3D, Double-D and C for all the topless cuties director Alexandre Aja feeds the fish and audience.

Bran Nue Dae is a strange change from the usual multiplex fare, and that's nearly enough to make it wonderful.

The movie is like an old vinyl LP; the best cuts are on the first side, there's a bangup finish and a lot of filler material in between.

Nunez handles Ruby's fragile personal growth with a loving concern that might escape most male filmmakers.

It's the nicest Mother's Day gift available at the movies this weekend.

Sloan and director Richard Benjamin (My Favorite Year) are content to drift along on the star power of Goldberg and Danson, who are certainly appealing actors, but push every wisecrack and doubletake into bad dinner theater territory. [28 May 1993, p.6B]

The choicest performance in Animal Kingdom is Weaver's sing-song sinister matriarch of the Cody clan, a cheery sort with the benign nickname "Mama Smurf."

The recurring fight scenes had a campy quality that recalled the funniest flicks from Hong Kong. [30 June 1995, p.11]

Finally, a horror film that doesn't turn on the gore machine nor confuse dread with decibels. One of the most convincing members of the cast is the gloriously creaky old house that sets up the spooky action. [23 July 1999, p.03]

Rudy and his wonderful story could make even an FSU fan genuflect before Touchdown Jesus. [13 Oct 1993, p.6B]

Outbreak is an expert what-if nightmare, albeit occasionally tempered by conventional distractions. [10 Mar 1995, p.2B]

Nelson's is one of the year's best performances in nothing less than one of the year's best films. [23 Sep 1994, p.2]

Perhaps if I hadn't laughed so hard at a recent revival of Blazing Saddles, then Mel Brooks' new film, Robin Hood: Men in Tights, wouldn't be such a dismal disappointment. [28 July 1993, p.6B]

Nobody's Fool is an actors' showcase and a dramatist's doodle. But what an actor. Newman's eloquent, understated portrayal of a jovial heel ranks among his greatest. [13 Jan 1995, p.8]

Above all else, Blues Brothers 2000 becomes an immensely appealing musical romp after the introductions are complete. [06 Feb 1998, p.8]

Out to Sea is nothing more than a puffed-up Love Boat episode sailing on risque gags that wouldn't be amusing at all if they weren't recited by old folks. [02 July 1997, p.1D]

It's Lane who's saddled with dragging this nag over the finish line, with her cliched portrayal of another single-minded woman beating men at their own game.

Reiner made another one of those stodgy courtroom pieces and forgot the first rule of a witness: Tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth. [03 Jan 1997, p.5]

For Love or Money is a featherweight romantic comedy that barely stays afloat, thanks to the effortlessly appealing personality of Michael J. Fox. [1 Oct 1993, p.11]

A sitcom pilot idea stretched to feature length boredom.

With a loving hand and immeasurable skill, Scorsese has fashioned a classic film for any age, innocent or otherwise. [24 Sept 1993, p.8]

Timecop has its fleeting moments of fun; mostly when Van Damme finally starts ribbing himself, years after Stallone and Schwarzenegger poked a hole in their own musclebound images. But director Peter Hyams and screenwriter Mark Verheiden (who co-created the Timecop comic book character) aren't nearly as clever as they think they are. [16 Sep 1994, p.6]

Sugar Hill is a movie that manages to be as self-destructive as its two central characters, Harlem drug-runners Roemello and Raynathan Skuggs. Like those two desperate (and disparate) brothers, Leon Ichaso's film ultimately wastes its potential and our time. [26 Feb 1994, p.7B]

The blueprint for every pirate movie since. [24 Jan 2008, p.28W]

Imagine a stuffy Merchant Ivory production blended with muted Michael Crichton sci-fi and you have Never Let Me Go, at least as it plays on screen.

Baruchel aside, The Sorcerer's Apprentice contains a few minor delights. One is Cage's surprisingly low-key approach to a role that he could be expected to play over the top.

This is certainly the talkiest of the seven films in the series and Craven never comes close to convincing us this could all be true. [14 Oct 1994, p.10]

For all its professional sheen, Species is a film that mistakenly believes it is smarter than the audience, scarier than any movie before it, and completely original. It's enough to make you laugh, if the filmmakers ever gave any impression that we're supposed to do that. Instead, we sit through 111 minutes of box office staples - sex, violence, more sex, more violence - and keep track of the better movies that Donaldson rips off. [07 July 1995, p.9]

Date Night is really just another example of what happens when funny sitcom stars are lumped together in a movie, believing that laughter exponentially increases with screen size.

The triumph of Manhattan Murder Mystery is the return to form of Keaton, whose Annie Hall mannerisms have been smoothed by age, but can still erupt in the face of frustration. Watching her and Allen work together again is a joy; there are times when it seems that this couple is actually Annie and Alvy Singer, all grown up and no place else to go but New York City. Keaton's delightful performance is the re-emergence of a fine actor who was creatively sidetracked too long. [20 Aug 1993, p.8]

The only memorable aspect of She's Out of My League is Eve's performance. Not that it's good, but it does possess the hypnotic quality of a flicker ring.

The best moments in Wayne's World 2 have been done before and better - a kung fu movie spoof and a running gag based on Oliver Stone's The Doors (which was unintentionally funnier). Surjik trots out a slew of star cameos and cinema salutes, but without the verve of Hot Shots!, Fatal Instinct or Wayne's World itself. [10 Dec 1993, p.6]

Hercules isn't likely to be revered 30 years from now like other Disney classics, but it's smart, safe family entertainment. [27 June 1997, p.3]

Egoyan's self-importance mars every frame of his film. [24 Mar 1995, p.9]