For 854 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 40% higher than the average critic
  • 6% same as the average critic
  • 54% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 10.7 points lower than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Simon Abrams' Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 55
Highest review score: 100 Viet and Nam
Lowest review score: 0 Zookeeper
Score distribution:
854 movie reviews
    • 83 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Love remains distinct, given its unsparing view of people as flawed and not very sure of themselves.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    The just-shy-of-great teen comedy Dear Dictator is the rare high-concept coming-of-age story with enough warmth and smart-ass charm to (hopefully!) make it accessible for a fairly wide cross-section of moviegoers.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Dupieux’s latest will either annoy or charm you depending on how much you appreciate being led around by the nose by a filmmaker and a cast of characters who seem pretty committed to jerking you around.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    I often rolled my eyes at the kitschy, broad humor that Knife+Heart director Yann Gonzalzez (who co-wrote the film with Cristiano Mangione) sometimes used to characterize his sexually active queer characters.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Goofy, over-earnest, and just good enough where it counts, Kalki 2898 AD outdistances its competition simply by digging deeper than expected into its patchy lore’s rich melodramatic turf.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    It is also the post-punk writer/director Sion Sono's most accessible film: a middle-aged filmmaker's tribute to the kind of epic-sized gangster-romance he used to fantasize about making.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    The Great Wall has significant problems — namely with Damon and sidekick Pedro Pascal's lack of bromantic chemistry — but chief among its rewards is its ability to marry its Eastern and Western sensibilities.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    With Bullet Train Explosion, you get a straight-down-the-line crowdpleaser, replete with duty-bound authority figures in well-pressed uniforms, anxious and often self-absorbed passengers, Macgyver-like problem-solving, seat-of-your-pants close calls, that sort of thing. There are no real surprises here, just what you’d want from this sort of cheeseball entertainment.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    It's also genuinely warm and involving because of the participation of everyone from Carmen Vega, Giger's widow, to Sandra Berretta, Giger's former assistant and self-described "life partner." The film is, in that sense, an effective memorial, one filmed after Giger himself admitted that he had said all he wanted to say in his art.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Sun Choke is, after all, a melodrama, so you have to believe in Hagan's character. All of the impressionistic cinematography and special effects in the world couldn't save the film if you didn't care enough about Hagan's performance.
    • 72 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Weathering With You, Shinkai’s latest animated romantic-fantasy to be released in America, has the same spark of ingenuity and consistency of vision as his earlier work.
    • 83 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    As we tag along with Haroun’s characters, we learn to appreciate their story as a small, but vivid study of lives that are so much more than their progressive developments.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    As a performer, Fischbach’s frantic performance can sometimes be distractingly monotonous, but as a filmmaker, he has an impressive eye not only for compositional details, but also for how his images cut and flow together.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    The movie’s cast members all seem to understand their assignments, which makes even the sketchiest material seem more robust. There’s also more technical polish, as well as a general knack for comic timing, than you might expect from a remake of “The Toxic Avenger.”
    • 65 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    A visually impressive mix of hand-drawn and CGI animation with basic action-adventure elements that are always viscerally satisfying thanks to Hosoda's apparent warts-and-all love for humanity.
    • 79 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    More detailed critical or historical context might have enhanced director Amanda Kim’s already informative and loving portrait of Korean video artist Nam June Paik. But there’s so much in Kim’s movie—especially in actor Steven Yeun’s voiceover narration and talking head interviews with Paik’s colleagues and contemporaries—that this account of Paik’s working life still resonates.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Baskin does what many horror films try and fail to do: it makes you feel like you're a passive prisoner/spectator, watching as an especially vivid nightmare unfolds.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Is it good? Uh, well, kind of. Does it make sense? Hmm, er, ask me another. Is it worth seeing? Oh, absolutely.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Character actor Tom Skerritt takes the lead for once in this gentle, melancholic drama about an older man who, while overwhelmed by suicidal thoughts, figures some things out for himself. Fans of David Guterson’s source novel will probably get it, but everyone else might need a moment to get the picture.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    The makers of Going to Mars do right by Giovanni by showing how she speaks for herself.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    The heroes of this film are, in other words, selfish, but never in a venal, or ugly way. They're human, and they do what they must to face each successive challenge they're confronted with.
    • 68 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Ne Zha 2 is a rare sequel that amplifies both its action and drama without sacrificing much of what already worked in the last movie. It’s also a rare blockbuster that offers something worthwhile for a wide-ranging audience.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    I can't think of another recent domestic drama that is simultaneously so optimistic and so melancholic.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Hark's new film is a consummately bizarre crowd-pleaser that throws everything at the viewer from makeshift plastic surgery by acupuncture to death by spontaneous combustion.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    Indian melodrama Rangoon somehow manages to be emotionally resonant despite being overstuffed. This is no small feat given how many different genres, tones, and characters this film juggles.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 75 Simon Abrams
    It’s “Avatar” meets “Fantastic Voyage,” and it also looks really good on a big screen thanks to Disney’s many, many talented animators. With their help, “Strange World” breezes through a checklist of formulaic plot points and canned emotional revelations with enough style and sensitivity to make it work.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    There are no good or bad people in The Island, just a group of hapless schmucks who become more sympathetic as they get more desperate.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    A worthy documentary tribute to the drag queen icon.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    German Concentration Camps Factual Survey may not teach us today much that Schindler's List, your local rabbi, or a quick Google search can't, but it remains a vital artifact of a time when Dachau and Auschwitz were not synonymous with "genocide."
    • 68 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Fortune Favors Lady Nikuko succeeds where so many other movies like it fail simply by making its characters seem real enough to be going through a series of familiar growing pains.
    • 57 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Stone-faced martial-arts star Donnie Yen does a lot with a little in wuxia weepy Ip Man 3, the rare kung fu film whose sentimental dialogue scenes are just as good as its stripped-down action sequences.
    • 47 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Memories of the Sword stands apart from other action films because Park wisely imagines violence as an elemental clash of dispositions.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    You've seen neo-noirs like this before, but you probably haven't had this much fun with a modern B movie in a while.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Winningly over-the-top Korean gangster drama Asura: The City of Madness is what you'd get if you combined The Wire with a really good soap opera.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    The grisly post-torture-porn horror flick Incident in a Ghostland serves as an effectively punishing critique of the relentless misogyny that has become a staple of every stupid Texas Chain Saw Massacre knockoff that pits sexually active women against emotionally disturbed serial killers.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    The equally thrilling and exhausting Hong Kong martial arts fantasy Detective Dee: The Four Heavenly Kings boasts more inventive weapons, monsters, and plot twists than most Western audiences will know what to do with.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Come for Ku's joyful choreography, stay for Yen's most memorable post-comeback performance.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    The makers of the irresistible character-study doc Itzhak capture Itzhak Perlman’s characteristic warmth and bravado through short, anecdote-centric scenes that make the Israeli American violinist sound like a big-hearted raconteur who’s just dying to tell you everything about himself.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    The Taking of Tiger Mountain may not always be as grand as it should be, but its thrills compensate for its shortcomings.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    The Elephant Queen may not suit every adult viewers’ taste, but it is exceptionally sensitive and consistently thoughtful, especially when it’s concerned with the sorts of facts of life of which younger kids are probably already vaguely aware.
    • 54 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Cassel’s Gauguin may ultimately be a lightweight cinematic descendant of the monstrous European pioneers that Klaus Kinski played in Aguirre, the Wrath of God and Fitzcarraldo, but he’s also both menacing and pitiable enough to make Gauguin: Voyage to Tahiti riveting on a moment-to-moment basis.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Chashme Baddoor's modest charms dissipate quickly, but they're certainly real.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Piers McGrail's nuanced, moody cinematography brings out the best in writer-director Ivan Kavanagh's over-mannered but effectively creepy ghost story.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Superior found-footage horror film Creep tellingly loses steam after it stops being a rote but tense game of chicken between a normcore derangoid (he likes hikes, hugs, and pancakes) and his wary victim.
    • 59 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Wu and Lin have great chemistry, but only because Chow was smart enough to reimagine Journey to the West as a rare character-driven big-budget action-adventure — the kind of thing Americans might love if they knew it existed.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Barely Lethal's combination of bawdy humor and earnest affection for its high-school-aged protagonists is surprisingly well-balanced.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Dany's mystery may ultimately go one twist too far. But until then, viewers can easily lose themselves while daydreaming about a French dame in distress with bad luck and an alluring look.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Skiptrace proves that nothing can stop Jackie Chan, not even poor judgment.
    • 42 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Boss is that rare Bollywood action film whose stars are worthy of the pedestal they're put on.
    • 38 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    First-time director Stiles White's effective use of long takes and director of photography David Emmerichs's wide-angle digital cinematography make an otherwise generic teen ghost story unexpectedly atmospheric.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Documentary character study Kung Fu Elliot starts off as a cringe-humor portrait of a delusional would-be action star, but gradually transforms into a thoughtful examination of its title character's naïveté.
    • 69 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Instead of over-glorifying their shared past, Ericsson pays loving tribute to what remains of his subjects' relationship.
    • 78 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Chan seems to do everything he can think of to ingratiate himself with viewers.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    What's most arresting is the way Mizgirev's vision of 1860s Russia shines through in the perspiration on Champagne goblets, the flicker of candlelight on faces, and the sheen of polished-steel dueling pistols.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Queer writer-director Mitchell Lichtenstein (the mind behind the vagina dentata horror-comedy Teeth) and an impressive team of collaborators inspire laughs and/or terror out of the libidinal hang-ups of frail stay-at-home mom Constance (Jena Malone) and her unfulfilled spouse, Joseph (Ed Stoppard).
    • 73 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Not Going Quietly credibly highlights the “moral stakes” of Barkan’s cause, as one of his colleague says, with a welcome mix of candor and artful consideration.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Thank You for Playing transforms a father's confession into a revealing work of art.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Thankfully, Cooke crams in so much persuasively appalling information — especially during a tangential aside on mentally ill patients’ high death rates — that it’s easy to forgive him for seemingly trying to push all viewers’ proverbial buttons at once.
    • 81 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Schwarz piles on more than enough damning interview footage to support his and Katz’s case, making Tantura a better-than-average work of docu-agitprop.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Because Silence’s might doesn’t eventually set things right for Snow Hill’s residents, The Great Silence goes out with a devastating bang.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 70 Simon Abrams
    Yakusho's breathless, riveting performance grounds The World of Kanako even as it threatens to devolve into an unbearable series of nihilistic plot twists and gory set pieces.
    • 53 Metascore
    • 67 Simon Abrams
    In this case, Eckhart exudes the sort of unselfconscious paternal energy that’s needed to keep things moving in between the familiar, but well-executed disaster movie story beats. He almost single-handedly makes Deep Water a better-than-average genre exercise, though the bloody shark attacks and corny banter don’t hurt either.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 65 Simon Abrams
    While this new “Dragon Ball” spinoff may not be all things to all viewers, it’s also a thrilling showcase for Toriyama’s beloved characters.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 65 Simon Abrams
    The sturdy but shallow martial arts melodrama Ip Man 4: The Finale isn’t much more than what fans have already gotten from the popular action franchise.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 65 Simon Abrams
    Impressive sound design, which makes every carabiner clink and boulder impact seem monumental, and Lee’s skilled use of close-up photography (combined with fast-cut montage editing) make “The Climbers” worth seeing on a big screen.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 65 Simon Abrams
    While some talking points tend to be belabored and others don’t get unpacked at great enough length, Lynch/Oz still offers movie-lovers a variety of thoughtful and dynamic new ways of seeing Lynch’s work.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 65 Simon Abrams
    If you like unabashedly corny teen romances, there’s a fair chance that the sheer too-much-ness of The Quintessential Quintuplets Movie will appeal to you.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 63 Simon Abrams
    Human error—or uncertainty—is the biggest source of tension in this movie, and it goes a long way towards making this sequel (a little) more than the sum of its flashy parts. You may not need another Escape Room, but this new one is good enough to leave you wanting more.

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