Joe Neumaier

Danish director Lars von Trier makes this tale of one woman’s banal sexual adventures into inadvertent comedy. The film makes an analogy between sex and fly-fishing — and fly-fishing comes off as more intriguing.

This movie is so dumb for most of its running time, you walk away wishing there was less plot and pointless posing and more of the fuel-injected coolness that brought you to the multiplex in the first place.

A smart, ardent, profound movie.

It never comes to much more than an atmospheric head-scratcher.

When people complain about movies glutting the market, this moronic “Black Swan”-meets-“Phone Booth” thriller is what they mean.

The only saving grace is Green, the reigning witch-queen of cinema. The smoky-eyed French actress, best known for “Casino Royale,” “The Golden Compass” and “Dark Shadows,” throws her all into the performance, going bare-chested at times, bared-teeth at others. She’s like Elizabeth Taylor’s "Cleopatra" possessed by a succubus — which is a good thing. Without her, 300: Rise of an Empire would be bloodless and brainless.

The result is a film almost too reliant on its players to push it through.

The best twist is how Neeson’s growly presence makes a bumpy ride enjoyable.

The movie grips us partly because Bakri’s performance is alternately casual and calculated.

It only comes alive when the star briefly shows the casual looseness that once was his calling card.

It’s impossible to find anything that grabs you in Pompeii. This lumpen adventure with a misguided romance buries anything in the disaster-flick genre that might have been a blast.

It’s playful, stable and sexy, thanks to a cast that knows how to find the sweet spots.

The remake of the 1987 cult actioner Robocop is a misguided failure — not only because its retooled half-man/half-machine hero now has emotions, but also because its “fear the machines” message winds up feeling creaky.

Though it’s more testimonial exhibit than movie, “Unjust” remains a crucial document.

There’s also little point and a garish quality that goes from pulp to junk fairly quickly, despite Pegg’s presence.

This eerily unsettling indie takes a few pleasantly unexpected turns before winding up in a traditional place. But if you think it isn’t worth the time, you have another think coming.

There’s great repartee between its cast of this “based on a true [but forgotten] story” of World War II. Yet the film overall isn’t colorful enough.

That Awkward Moment is eminently forgettable — but worth remembering as Poots’ moment.

Far from burning bright, this earnest indie starts out dull and gets duller.

With a snappy score made up of American standards and tons of Gallic spice, “Love” wins us over.

As seen in Charlie Victor Romeo (code for “Cockpit Voice Recorder”), the events are almost unbearably gripping.

Branagh, taking advantage of his experience helming 2011’s “Thor,” shows an allegiance to the genre he’s working in; both as director as co-star, he pours on the menace.

This ludicrously written, buffoonishly acted, irritatingly filmed sword-and-sandals epic hasn't half the sand, sweat or saltiness of other titles in the genre.

Cranston, in a fake beard and dark glasses, seems to be enjoying his goofy act. Trouble is, this isn’t the kind of movie in which goofy earns goodwill.

This honest and engrossing film shows how ingenuity and spark can restore excitement in education. That goal needs every helping hand it can get.

This Canadian Hamlet, completed years ago, is as airless as a tomb.

The concept is the same, and just as tired as it was when the second, third and fourth sequels to “Paranormal Activity’s” 2009 first installment.

In the monumentally dull 47 Ronin, Reeves mumbles monosyllabic claptrap between dull action scenes. And it’s a shame: At almost 50 years old, the actor allows this turgid, clanky flick to play to his worst stereotypes.