James Berardinelli

Fly Me to the Moon isn’t a complete failure to launch (thanks primarily to the not-inconsiderable charisma and energy Johansson brings to the production) but neither does it have the thrust to make it into orbit.

Like most unintended second installments, this one is superfluous – a remix of moments, scenes, and images from its predecessor infused with the need to make everything bigger and louder.

The result is sappy, saccharine, and predictable to the point where it's almost painful.

Nevertheless, given Washington's presence and the promise of a virtual reality action story, Virtuosity has some appeal -- provided, of course, the viewers aren't selective.

Contains multiple ax murders, lesbianism, incest, a hanging, and a storm at sea -- yet, despite all of this seemingly enticing material, it's a bore.

There are problems with De Palma's version, especially in its portrayal of the key relationship between Carrie and her mother, but it's a more engaging and insightful portrayal than Kimberly Peirce's too-slick remake.

Offers slim pickings for viewers, regardless of whether they're fans of Woody Allen or not. And I'm sure the French will love it.

In the end, however, it’s all a rather hollow experience (as is too often the case with existential horror).

Being fascinating and unique, two qualities unquestionably in evidence here, don’t automatically deserve praise and, because of the film’s high quotient of tediousness, I find it impossible to recommend to any but the most devoted of experimental art film lovers. It works very well, however, as a cure for insomnia.

Undercover Blues is silly enough to deserve some credit, and for those who see it, there will at least be a few laughs. This empty-headed comedy revels in its own admitted idiocy. It's debatable whether anyone would want to pay money for this picture, but when it gets to cable, it will be worth a look for those who are in the right mood. After all, there's always a place for mindless entertainment, even if that place is on television.

To be fair, The Forest boasts a promising premise but squanders most of its goodwill as a result of narrative shortcuts and contrivances, horror film clichés, and haphazard editing.

Mad Money is a comedy caper where the caper's not interesting and the comedy's not funny.

21 doesn't spin a good enough yarn.

Pretty pictures - thats what The Fall has to offer.

It's disposable entertainment at its most extreme.

Yes, the film is interesting, but it doesn't work.

The opening sequence/prologue is gripping but that’s the only aspect of Twisters that works on its intended level. I was not blown away.

The problem here isn't as much the talent in front of the camera as it is the weak and hackneyed script. Vampire in Brooklyn is in need of an infusion (or should that be transfusion?) of originality and creativity -- two qualities that are blatantly absent.

Samaritan isn’t terrible but neither is it especially good. It’s a B-grade comic book movie that looks, sounds, and plays like a B-grade comic book movie.

Tammy is a road trip movie and, like many road trip movies, it embraces a meandering, aimless tone. It's often said for films of this sort that it's the journey that matters, not the destination. Unfortunately, in this case, neither is worth the price of admission.

I suppose there are reasons to see That Darn Cat, but only if you're under twelve and desperate, or accompanying someone in that category.

A kinetic, visually dazzling thriller that's actually a notch above many of its predecessors - albeit only a small notch.

At a guess, I'd say that Goosebumps will satisfy its core audience - fans of R.L. Stine's popular children's books - and bore pretty much everyone else.

Red Dragon is done in a painfully mechanical, by-the-book manner. Scenes are assembled to move the plot from point A to point B. There's no atmosphere. No tension. Flat performances. All of these problems are rightfully laid at the feet of the man in charge.

With each death, the film becomes less interesting. By the end, it's just a routine slasher flick with a too-predictable final "twist."

Despite a strong opening and riveting first 45 minutes, The Maze Runner devolves into one of the weakest post-apocalyptic Young Adult movies to reach theaters in recent years.

It has impeccable production values but feels like a "Masterpiece Theater" production of a Harlequin romance novel.

It has an interesting subtext. I'm referring to the way the lives and friendships of these four individuals crumble in the wake of their accident.

The best segments of the film occur early, as the setting is established with a dose of "Friday Night Lights" normalcy followed by an invasion that recalls "Independence Day."

It's only possible to have the time of your life once, and, for this franchise, that was in 1987.

Die-hard fans are advised to wait for the video. Everyone else would be better off pretending that this movie doesn't exist. In the long run, you'll have a higher opinion of everyone involved.

Despite a promising premise and effective "Shyamalan twist", this low-budget horror film still underwhelms. "The Sixth Sense" writer/director is his own worst enemy in the choices he makes bringing The Visit to the screen.

Entirely inoffensive, so it makes for perfect family fare -– but only if the children are young enough to be indiscriminating about what they're seeing.

Too much in Nacho Libre doesn't work to enable me to recommend it to anyone except a card-carrying member of the Jack Black fan club.

Saying bad things about Never Been Kissed, an unapologetic crowd-pleaser, makes me feel like the Grinch stealing Christmas, but there are some things that can't be ignored.

It's tough to make a good tearjerker - one need look no further than this misfire to understand why.

The seeds of a nice little white-knuckle thriller are evident but they never germinate properly. The end result is profoundly disappointing and can’t be saved by the few individual moments that do work.

Watching Live and Let Die isn't a complete waste of time, but there's no overriding reason why anyone should go out of their way to see it unless they're a die-hard Bond fan or are curious about Roger Moore's first turn in the role.

A little like watching an episode of the TV show of which Adam Sandler is an alum: "Saturday Night Live." Zohan feels like an extended collection of skits tied together by a flimsy umbrella story.

For nearly two hours, the movie plods along, offering little beyond hackneyed dialogue that can’t be gleaned from a quick read-through of Marley’s Wikipedia entry.

Unfortunately, for all its button-pushing, the movie's biggest offense is that it is often tedious and meandering and it takes at least 30 minutes too long to cross the finish line.

Although the production is sporadically amusing, it feels like a 20-minute short that was expanded to feature length to its considerable detriment.

With its cheesy special effects and blasphemously imbecilic storyline, one wonders whether the celluloid version of Ghost Rider will find an audience.

The movie's central flaw: it's not funny enough to be worth the price of admission.

The acting is a big part of Baghead's problem. Three of the four protagonists are played by performers who do little to distinguish themselves.

Affleck is at his best playing wisecracking supporting roles (like in the recent Air, which Affleck also directed) and at his worst as an action hero. He sleepwalks his way through Hypnotic, doing little to rouse the audience from its own slumber while failing to generate any sparks with his co-star, Alice Braga.

Starts out as an effective little horror movie before devolving into an incoherent mess during its final 30 minutes.

Iron Will's presentation of family values and reliance upon formulas are distinctive. The film has enough action to keep it from becoming boring, but there are too many flaws for this to be considered anything more grand than adequate entertainment.

The only time Sparkle evidences energy is during the song performances, of which there are too few. The half-baked melodrama provides an unappealing and overlong buffer between them that fails to justify the nearly two-hour running time.

Various subplots are given short shrift and the whole thing feels more like a Cliff's Notes version of a longer piece than an actual finished motion picture.

Coscarelli's screenplay introduces an abundance of intriguing concepts but never goes very far with any of them. The characters are paper thin and the special effects are laughably bad.

On a purely narrative level, Winter's Tale missteps early and often. Its earnestness is its downfall, resulting in opportunities for unintentional humor.

A profoundly unsatisfying experience - and that doesn't consider the derivative nature of the plot and a lackluster performance by the lead actor.

Although Sinister 2 continues the story begun in Scott Derrickson's creepily effective "Sinister," it feels more like an unnecessary retread than an organic extension of the original.

Although the second installment is effective at moving the story forward rather than re-treading familiar ground, it enters a patch of quicksand from which it is unprepared to escape. Disney is adept at doing many things but offering a sobering and intelligent examination of genocide is not among them.

Sean Connery is perfect for the King Arthur role. Too bad he isn't given more to do than stand around looking regal.

Insurgent is more clumsy than bad, but it disappoints because it wastes the world-building of Divergent, which set the stage for something more momentous than what the sequel delivers.

This is a charmless, lifeless affair that had me leaving the theater in a mood more appropriate to a funeral than a wedding.

Inept storytelling is one of Lords of Dogtown's great frustrations.

This sloppy mess also pales in comparison to the better-paced, taut "Olympus Has Fallen," which represents 2013's better White House invasion story.

There's some potential in this storyline, but the movie doesn't do much with it besides giving Martin Short an opportunity to put on the fat suit.

The film has energy but isn't well paced. Nothing about it quite gels.

Laws of Attraction is a standard-issue romantic comedy that's missing a key ingredient: the attraction.

The Emoji Movie proves unable to provide even a modicum of content capable of capturing or retaining the attention of an adult. Nap time.

I suppose it’s possible to argue that The Darkest Minds can be enjoyed for what it is. Unfortunately, that “what” refers to something incomplete.

Eternals, despite trying to be a departure from the superhero generic norm, misses wide of the mark and ends up being a major lapse.

Lack of focus is ultimately the undoing of sophomore feature director Yann Demange – despite crafting several compelling stand-alone sequences, he is unable to stitch everything together into a compelling whole.

At least What Women Want could be identified as an enjoyable rom-com with a dose of female empowerment. One would have to be charitable to use “romantic”, “comedy”, or “enjoyable” for this new iteration.

Domino is a lackluster, hard-to-swallow police procedural with soap opera-ish subplots and flat characters.

The Meg takes itself far too seriously. The only amusing elements are Jason Statham’s occasional one-liners coupled with his exasperated expressions.

The sloppiness of the ending doesn't only damage The Black Dahlia, it sinks the project.

If movies were rated solely on the basis of style, The Quick and the Dead would score highly indeed. With its dazzling photography, inventive camera angles, and throbbing bass score, the film is an experience for the eyes and ears. Director Sam Raimi and cinematographer Dante Spinotti have woven a beautifully elaborate tapestry: colorful and evocative -- and depressingly two-dimensional.

Turns out to be hopelessly mediocre -- a poorly scripted, preachy fable that forgets about unfolding a coherent, believable story in its zeal to spread propaganda.

One note portrayals, skin deep characters, and a glacial pace all combine to prevent The Quarry from succeeding either as a slow-burn thriller or a message-oriented drama.

A high-concept, low-brow romantic comedy that overstays its welcome by at least a half-hour and can’t decide whether it wants to buy into or satirize the incomprehensibly popular European singing contest.

Wheeler is extremely secure in filming the sex scenes - they are inarguably erotic - but she has trouble with serious drama. Overall, that makes Better Than Chocolate a mixed bag with a wavering focus. In many ways, it's like the majority of heterosexual romances -- not unpleasant or unwatchable, but nothing special.

By playing things too safe, it loses the power and spontaneity that gave Creed its energy and drive.

Watching Untogether, it’s easy to wish Forrest had elected to focus exclusively on Andrea and leave Tara as a background supporting character.

It’s disposable action entertainment – a throw-away title that’s not bad enough to turn off but not good enough to seek out.

The end result, while it provides moments of kinetic entertainment, is too repetitive and uneven to be satisfying.

If nothing else, Entourage (the movie) can be considered a faithful follow-up to Entourage (the TV program). That's good news for anyone who enjoyed the series up to the end and not-so-good news for those who lost interest along the way or never were interested in the first place.

The movie offers limited entertainment for those who enjoy this sort of fare but it’s impossible to recommend as anything more than a throw-away at-home selection when all the better streaming titles have been watched.

As far as the actors are concerned, Liam Neeson seems to be having fun hamming it up as the villain - a role he rarely gets to play.

Beneath its aw-shucks, wants-to-be-liked exterior, this is a bankrupt motion picture. It's cloying, artificial, and not the least bit romantic.

The movie does an effective job with all the expected horror movie tropes – things that go bump in the night, shadows that don’t move the way they should, images in mirrors, etc. – but the basic narrative loses its way around the time that Amanda Seyfried is sent packing.

A tepid affair, distinguished by bland character development, uninspired and insipid dialogue, and a nonexistent plot.

The film has two highlights -- a profanity-laced monologue by Peter Falk about boxing and the one-on-one confrontation between Monroe and Chambers in the ring.

Two fundamental problems afflict Sex Tape (aside from the fact that it's not consistently funny): a shocking ignorance about the state of modern technology and a mistaken belief that the subject matter is inherently edgy.

While it’s possible to conceive a compelling story constructed out of the strands forming Joy Ride’s threadbare cloak, that narrative would require a better screenplay and a series of grounded, less ostentatious performances.

A fast-food type of movie - it looks good in the commercials and is easy to sit through, but it doesn't offer much in the way of satisfaction.

This is a joyless experience made all the sadder because most viewers still remember the naughty delights delivered by "American Pie."

Unfortunately, although there’s an opportunity here to do something compelling, that opportunity is largely wasted. Perfunctory characterization, lackluster acting, an inability to sustain tension, and an incoherent ending waste most of the goodwill resulting from the premise.

If the legend of Dracula has become tired through overuse, there is certainly nothing in this iteration to grant the old Count a new lease on life.

While I admired the lead performances, the journey of The Drama remains unfulfilling. When I see a movie like this, I want to connect with the characters and believe their circumstances. I got some of the former but practically none of the latter.

For those whose only requirements for horror movies are that they avoid the excesses of blood/gore/violence prevalent in R-rated fare and incorporate a few good jump-scares, Night Swim checks the requisite boxes. For those looking for a more complete experience, however, the movie struggles even to achieve the level where it would be considered worthwhile as a streaming option.

It’s past time to let the dinosaurs take a nice, long vacation. That way, when they come back, maybe we can once again be excited about them. “Excitement” is not something Rebirth delivers with relish or consistency.

As scattershot and uneven as it is unnecessary, it fails to effectively build on the foundation laid in Afterlife while at the same time relegating the “old timers” into oddly-integrated super-cameo appearances.

There are moments when The Relic is almost enjoyable, albeit in a visceral sort of way. Unfortunately, when all is said and done, this horror/science fiction amalgamation seems like nothing more ambitious than a bad reworking of elements from Aliens, Species, Jaws, and Predator.

Smokin' Aces is Tarantino lite - a vague and unsuccessful attempt to bring together a bunch of offbeat, unrelated characters in a situation where a bloody resolution is inescapable.

I can recognize when a movie has been made for the sole purpose of generating a few cheap bucks, and that's exactly the case with The Rugrats Movie, an embarrassingly juvenile production that would seem more at home in the midst of Saturday morning cartoons than on a big screen.

The biggest crime committed by The Spy Who Dumped Me isn’t its dearth of humor or reliance on an unimaginative espionage plot but the way it wastes the talents of its leads, Mila Kunis and Kate McKinnon.

The Venom sequel checks all the generic comic book movie boxes and, if all one expects from a film adaptation is a straightforward translation with motion and live actors, it’s hard to knock Let There Be Carnage. But, in an era when most superhero productions are becoming increasingly complex, challenging one another for greater depth and storyline intricacy, the shallowness of both Venom movies stands out in an unflattering fashion.

This is easily the worst filmed version of anything penned by the prolific author.

The scares (if you want to call them that) are still there - one "boo!" moment after another, strung together like a breadcrumb trail through a labyrinth. So if that's all you want from a Halloween release like Paranormal Activity 3, you are the perfect audience member.

This is schlock -– by-the-numbers action that ignores character development to the point where we find it hard to care whether L.T. catches Hallam.

Post Grad isn't funny, surprising, or insightful enough to provoke more than a ho-hum reaction. It's not bad in the way that many failed comedies are bad; it's simply uninspired.

It's amazing how a lifeless, pointless remake can provoke pangs of nostalgia about a mediocre movie.

Strange that a movie about comedy is so lacking in this quality.

This is a train wreck of an action film -– a stupefying attempt by the filmmakers to force-feed James Bond into the mindless "XXX" mold and throw 40 years of cinematic history down the toilet in favor of bright flashes and loud bangs.

This is essentially a Steven Seagal movie without the Ponytailed One, and may appeal to those who enjoyed Seagal's rather bland, cookie-cutter action films.

An insipid, stillborn drama that drags its viewers through a ghetto of despair before finally, unexpectedly plopping them down in the midst of a happy ending.

Although each episode might be marginally entertaining in its own right, the overall effect is that the movie isn't funny enough, exciting enough, or dramatic enough to warrant two hours of an audience member's time.

At least the werewolves in Red Riding Hood have teeth and, when in human form, they don't parade around shirtless.

The first half-hour (or so) of Clue is enjoyably witty but, after that, it’s a downhill mudslide.

With a theatrical trailer far better than the actual picture, Schroeder's film delivers little more than a healthy dose of disappointment. The picture is watchable, but nothing about it will linger, except perhaps the feeling that, with a more polished script, it might have been significantly better.

Simply put, Boiling Point functions as an apt definition of cinematic mediocrity, with little to laud or despise. It's the kind of motion picture you can yawn your way through without getting overly worked up about the money you lost paying the price of admission.

Disappointing, but barely watchable.

Robert Duvall does far from his best job here. His is basically a "mail it in" performance, but, considering the script he's working from, it's no wonder. Something to Talk About is weary -- every ounce of energy and originality has long since been wrung out of this formula, and the "twist" of having the leads already married doesn't do much to spice up things. Ultimately, this "something" turns out to be nothing much at all.

Director Todd Haynes' (Safe) much-anticipated look at the "glam rock" scene of two decades ago, is like a jigsaw puzzle with half of the pieces missing.

The first film was significantly better and, therefore, is the place to start for anyone with a modicum of interest. Underworld: Rise of the Lycans is an also-ran that is likely to be appreciated only by completists.

Too much of what The Spy Who Shagged Me has to offer is tired and derivative, and, when the various jokes and gags are tallied, there are many more misses than hits.

A mostly failed attempt to merge sci-fi with satire, Mickey 17 suffers from a fragmented narrative and a scenery-chewing performance from Mark Ruffalo that belongs in a different movie (perhaps Poor Things).

Besson may have misfired with The Fifth Element, but at least he does it with flair and a sense of humor.

With a movie of this sort, the viewer expects to undergo something grueling and disturbing. Trade's inability to deliver that sort of visceral experience makes it unworthy of anyone's hard-earned dollars.

Pretty much a one-trick pony, and, after a while, that trick loses its ability to impress.

It takes something lackluster like The Amazing Spider-Man 2 to remind viewers why movies like "Captain America: The Winter Soldier" are considered superior.

Takes the action/adventure story to new heights of preposterousness. In a way, that's not a bad thing, since it allows a certain level of guilty enjoyment.

Perhaps the thing that most surprised me is how fingernails-on-blackboard awful the music is.

Kaufman once again reminds us that, without a Jonze or a Gondry to shape and prune the writer’s constructs, we’re destined to become stuck in a frustrating morass of eccentricity and self-indulgence.

Obtuse, narratively incoherent, and ultimately frustrating, it stands as another example of how hard it is to make a good mainstream movie out of a popular computer game.

Outside of a clever re-invention of how the North Pole works, Red One doesn’t do a lot right, which is surprising considering that the project re-teams director Jake Kasdan and actor Dwayne Johnson, who made the thoroughly enjoyable Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle.

The biggest flaw of the 1990 Total Recall was how disappointingly banal the endgame was. Wiseman adds some special effects and Michael Bay-style pyrotechnics, but the result is similar. It's doubly deflating because one of the great advantages of remaking a movie is being given the opportunity to correct problems - something not attempted here.

Takes things too far by leaving about 75% of its questions unanswered. This isn't an artistic choice; it's screenwriting sloppiness, and it results in a profoundly dissatisfying experience.

The movie is replete with bloody encounters, sly asides, and one-liners, but the tone is awkward and uneven. There are also some serious structural problems that we're supposed to brush aside.

The most intriguing aspects of Extraordinary Measures relate to the behind-the-scenes politicking that goes on to keep the drug development on track, although the screenplay cheats toward the end (presumably because of time constraints and a concern that too much detail might bore audiences).

A lot of what's intended to be funny falls flat, in part because it's too obvious and in part because director Steve Pink is clumsy when it comes to comedic timing.

Hitman: Agent 47 might offer a passable diversion for action junkies but, for everyone else, it's best avoided.

Folie a Deux functions as an overlong, pretentious coda – a slog that barely advances the narrative while regurgitating elements from the first film.

Joe Eszterhas' screenplay doesn't make sense, and he doesn't bother to hide this fact. In the end, Basic Instinct teases and screws us with the same efficiency that the film's femme fatale handles the protagonist.

Although the movie has the capacity to engage and entertain young children, its bland storyline and cut-rate animation won’t impress many adults. This is a classic case of an animated film being targeted exclusively at younger viewers without much consideration about keeping parents from falling asleep.

The plot is straightforward and predictable to the point of painfulness.

The Sitter is sort of an "Adventures in Babysitting" with a potty mouth.

We believe the dislike at the onset but not the romance at the payoff. And that's a major flaw.

Since the stunts are sub-par and feature considerable computer help, the movie gives the impression that it's trying too hard to be campy and silly.

In the end, you have to possess a sweet spot for Black and his antics to find Tenacious D more than barely watchable.

Putting aside any long-term implications, The Multiverse of Madness is a frustrating mix of eclectic elements that at times feel more like Raimi referencing his Evil Dead movies than his previous superhero work. It’s undeniably fascinating and at times exhilarating but my overall feeling is one of vague disappointment.

There's hardly a single aspect of this motion picture that seems more than superficially credible, and if the United States government is really run in the Keystone Cops manner depicted in Wayne Beach and David Hodgin's script, then this country is in a great deal more trouble than anyone suspects.

Relies on uncomfortable black humor and moments of sincere drama to involve viewers. But everything is encased in artifice and the movie becomes a chore to take in.

Put The Angry Birds Movie 2 into the basket of sequels that no one was asking for.

He's still big and burly, but, at age 54, Schwarzenegger is starting to look a little too old to be involved in this kind of stuff. Action films are the province of younger stars.

With a generic cast, Don’t Look Up would have been a disappointment. With this star-studded cast, the classification of a “missed opportunity” doesn’t do it justice; it feels closer to a tragedy.

So, for Bad Boys for Life, we avoid a trip into the lowest depths of hell in favor of a dead end.

The "now" scenes feel much like an excuse for four high-profile actresses to lend their names to this film. At best, their presence is superfluous. Yet even had the film remained entirely in the "then" time frame, it still would have been lacking. There's just not enough originality here, no matter what year it is.

Mediocre and recommended only to those who can claim a familiarity with the play.

There's nothing in The Guardian that audiences haven't previously been exposed to ad nauseam.

As a cavalcade of highlight clips, it’s hard to imagine something more attention-catching. But as a movie… What works as a sizzle reel totaling three minutes shows its inherent shallowness when expanded to nearly two hours.

The film's heart is undoubtedly in the right place, but so what? Fine ideals don't mean much when they're couched in an inert, pointless storyline.

This film never believably captures the sport it portrays, and that leads to a picture that's closer to a strikeout than a home run.

Wassup Rockers is amateurish, but without the redeeming qualities found in "Kids" and "Bully."

Considering the talent involved and the strength of the source material, there's no way Edge of Darkness should have been this disappointing. Part of the problem is a direct result of condensation - there's no way to cram six hours of the dense mini-series upon which the movie is based into about 110 minutes without paying a penalty.

A major misstep and a disappointment of significant proportions. It may not be a failure for Eastwood the actor, but it's a big one for Eastwood the director.

A stillborn affair that could have been -- and should have been -- a whole lot hipper and funnier. If you've seen the two- minute theatrical trailer, you've seen nearly everything that's worthwhile in the feature.

Its failure to live up to even modest expectations is a blow. There's nothing righteous to be found here.

Captive State is a messy, incomplete affair. Attempts to assemble it into a workable package in the editing room didn’t work, so we’re left with a weird cross between "District 9" and "The Battle of Algiers" that doesn’t do either of those apparent inspirations justice.

Allegiant tries to cram too little story into too much time. This results in dead spots and uneven pacing.

The good news first: The Alamo is probably the most historically accurate depiction yet to reach the screen of the famous siege. The bad news is that "historically accurate" does not necessarily translate into "dramatically successful."

Pompeii is a big, glorious, cheesy mess.

The core problem with Girls Trip is its length. What might be a fun, frivolous affair at 90 minutes turns into an endurance contest as the clock ticks toward the two-hour mark.

Pretty Persuasion reminds me of a half-hour TV series that has a great pilot episode, then falls apart in subsequent installments. Movies need to grow and change to keep things interesting; this one is stagnant.

Awake is short enough (about 85 minutes) that it doesn't wear out its welcome. It's not a good movie but it's silly and lively enough to keep most viewers from dozing off, even if that might be a more profitable use of their time.

A dull, meandering storyline and visuals all-but destroyed by a second-rate 3-D conversion make this movie inferior to its predecessors.

Someone please get director Ric Roman Waugh a tripod! Snitch might be a passable action-thriller but it's hard to say because every time an action scene comes along, the image shakes so badly it's impossible to keep anything in view or focus.

Although Reminiscence is made with care and competence and features a strong underlying premise, the film as a whole is forgettable.

Dark Shadows is a mess, and it's unclear whether its bizarre recipe of comedy, campy horror, and gothic melodrama will satisfy anyone, regardless of their familiarity with the source material.

It's not as clever as it thinks it is, not as funny or exciting as it should be, and not as engaging as it needs to be to prevent kids from losing interest and parents from falling asleep.

It’s cinematic fast-food but not of the delicious, addictive variety. It’s a little overcooked and has gone cold – still edible but by no means satisfying.

Neither smart enough nor funny enough to have cross-over appeal to any other demographic.

There’s no rule that main characters have to be likable, and DeHaan’s Lockhart isn’t, but they at least have to be interesting. He fails that litmus test.

MouseHunt is "'Home Alone" with a rodent in the place of Macaulay Culkin.

The Substitute has its moments, all of which fall in the realm of high camp. One scene not to be missed: Shale, attempting to get his class' attention, roars, "I'm the warrior chief! I'm the merciless god who rules over everything that stirs in my universe!" It's a hilarious moment, and I'm reasonably certain the director intended for it to be so. Nevertheless, aside from a lot of only moderately-satisfying violence, The Substitute comes across as rather lame. It's not boring, but that dubious qualification isn't enough to earn the movie a passing grade.

This isn't just a horror movie with gore - it's a gore movie, period. Blood is its raison d'etre. It's not scary. It's not shocking. It just wallows in viscera. Ho-hum. Pass the ketchup.

Bridesmaids is bipolar filmmaking at its most disconcerting, with changes in tone so abrupt that they can cause whiplash. In part because of this and in part because the writing is often lazy and self-indulgent, the movie rarely works.

Put simply, this movie is dumb.

Action fans probably won't be offended, provided they're not expecting Berenger to be America's answer to James Bond. There are occasions when Sniper shows flashes of promise, although most of these are short-lived. The film is capable of providing a one-hundred minute diversion for anyone who has nothing better to do. The potential is here for something much better, but, unfortunately, Sniper shoots itself in the foot.

As for Venom, the potential inherent in the creature has been wasted and squandered over the course of three movies and this final installment is the worst offender of all.

Last Action Hero is sporadically entertaining, but it could have been a whole lot more. Trimmed down and better edited, this film might have been a top-notch satire. As it is, however, it gets caught someplace in between action and comedy, and never really comes across as a solid example of either.

Unless you’re a fan of extreme sports photography, the 2015 Point Break lags behind its predecessor in most areas.

There's something a little annoying about a movie that tries this shamelessly to be endearing and family friendly.

Reading a Sparks novel allows one's imagination to enter the equation. Watching one of his stories adapted on screen has exactly the opposite effect: it neuters the imagination. This is soap opera, pure and simple.

This isn’t a good movie in the conventional sense of the word but it may hit the sweet spot for those who have declared their affection for the slacker musicians originated by Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter more than 30 years ago.

This new interpretation does few things better than the original, and many things worse.

As a streaming offering available as part of a subscription package, it might be considered an adequate way to pass 90 minutes but as a reason to venture out to a theater, it’s hard to imagine anyone willing to go to those lengths for something this forgettable.

The Holiday is no vacation. Sloppy writing, an overindulgent editor, and poor casting have taken an intriguing premise and transformed it into an uneven mess.

What a waste of a talented cast! There are times when it can be depressing to see so much acting potential wasted on a script unable to elicit the best from its stars, and this is one such occasion.

In short, although Blackbird is effective as a buzz-kill and features a few nicely choreographed scenes, too little about the film feels like real life and who wants a fantasy film that’s such a relentless downer?

The story told by Jackson's The Lovely Bones is the same as the one related by Sebold, but it lacks the complexity and empathy evident in the book.

While the idea sounds fertile, the execution is uneven, and the comedy sporadic at best.

The comedy is sporadically amusing but never laugh-aloud funny and the drama, which one might charitably argue is trying for a Toy Story-level emotional response, fails utterly. (However, I imagine most kids up to about pre-teen age will love it.)

One of those movies in which the principals talk a lot but don't say much.

A somewhat lackluster cop buddy movie that goes wrong in two big ways: (1) it fails to utilize Chan's full range of skills, relegating him to the role of a kickboxing action hero and virtually ignoring his comedic aptitude, and (2) it saddles him with a partner, played by the irritating Chris Tucker.

Aside from the inept "August Rush," there probably isn't a more clumsily manipulative motion picture out there this holiday season than P.S. I Love You.

The film, which has the ingredients for a thoughtful, tense thriller throws away a compelling first half so it can descend into silliness and clichés.

As coming of age stories go, Wah-Wah does little to distinguish itself.

By turns frustrating and tedious, this can sink even the most intriguing story.

Deliver us from directors who think that asking cast members to overact is the only way he can cover us the numerous ludicrous weaknesses of his screenplay.

A horror film that starts out creepy but ends up disjointed and borderline- incoherent. It's a shame that the final product isn't a little better packaged because, unlike many lame entries into the genre, this one actually contains a few interesting, philosophically titillating ideas.

The "Apatow formula" is pretty simple: raunchy comedy, likeable characters, and a dash of sweetness (but nothing too sweet). Drillbit Taylor fulfills the third characteristic but falls short in the other two.

The story's entire foundation is based upon a plot hole so gargantuan that anyone not suffering a brain cramp will identify it at once.

The movie ends up feeling superficial and mechanical. Warhol is a cut-and-dried villain rather than a complex individual.

This is not a good movie but, considering what Halloween has evolved into over the course of seven sequels, it's perhaps better than it has a right to be.

We’ve seen this kind of thing before but it’s done with sufficient schmaltz to work on its own terms. Damning with faint praise? You betcha, but that’s all I have.

Unfortunately, while director AJ Jankel (Super Mario Bros – yes, she’s the one responsible for that) captures aspects of the hostility toward lesbian relationships in that earlier era, she does it without nuance. Her framing of characters is black-and-white and the far-too-pat ending offers an unearned resolution.

There's no shortage of candidates for the fatal flaw: the artificial storyline; the presence of a ridiculously cliched character; the lack of chemistry between illicit lovers. Blaming one of these problems is probably unfair. The movie's failure is likely based on a fusion of all these, and perhaps a few others.

Some of the dialogue is astonishingly awful. Sex and relationships are constantly likened to animal interaction.

The story is so obvious that a viewer could leave the theater for fifteen minutes and not be even a little lost upon his return.

The occasional laughs provided aren't frequent enough or uproarious enough to warrant an investment of nearly two hours of a viewer's time.

The best way to sum up Freddy Vs. Jason is: good concept, mediocre execution.

A feature film adaptation of King’s best novel is deserving of something more epic than this throw-away production.

The Commuter falls into line with Neeson’s other high-octane, low-intelligence efforts and part of the reason it works (to the degree that it works) is because of the sincerity with which the actor attacks the part.

The Space between Us is what it looks like when a promising premise is betrayed by a dumbed-down, hackneyed screenplay.

It's tame and rather bland, and the laughter it generates is half-hearted. Director Jesse Peretz commits the unpardonable sin of wasting the considerable comedic talent of Paul Rudd.

Renaissance Man is a movie of moments, too many of which are mediocre or unfulfilling.

By de-mythologizing Alexander, Stone has turned him into an unbelievable individual. We accept great deeds from great people, not from sniveling whiners.

Friday the 13th is neither tense nor frightening (although, to be fair, it is at times creepy and atmospheric, due in part to budgetary limitations that led to a low-key style).

Working with time travel is never an easy task and, when a filmmaker doesn’t take a rigorous, consistent approach, it can become a mess. Such is the case with Don’t Let Go.

As high camp, Willard might have something going for it, but not as a horror movie.

Yes, A Late Quartet is disappointing. But it's also pretty bad.

Carlito's Way probably should have been a taut thriller, but choices by DePalma in both presentation and editing have hamstrung it.

Despite high production standards and a slick advertising campaign, Primal Fear is as trite and routine as any made-for-TV courtroom drama.

Unevenly paced and with a miscast lead, the movie fails to get us to care about its automaton main character as she goes through the motions in a generic spy thriller.

The obligatory concluding remark for a horror movie about the undead applies here: the best approach is to leave it buried.

Instead of vying for a so-bad-it’s-entertaining categorization, it falls squarely into the hell of cinematic mediocrity.

One of the cleverest moments in Sacha Baron Cohen's The Dictator comes during the first five seconds: a memorial dedication to Kim Jong Il. It's all downhill from there.

The Dark Tower isn’t a bad movie even though there’s a clumsiness to its narrative and a cheapness to its appearance.

Bloodshot suffers from a world-building failure. With too little time and emphasis placed on crafting the setting and exploring some of the rich possibilities of the milieu in which events transpire, the movie turns into little more than a ho-hum Vin Diesel action film.

One of the most positive comments that can be made about Hick is that it advances Chloe Grace Moretz's claim to be one of the best young actresses emerging into today's spotlight.

Cutthroat Island is a mindless diversion. If, for whatever reason, you decide to go, maintain low expectations. Hoping for more than a bunch of loud bangs and ridiculous dialogue will rob Cutthroat Island of its amusement value.

The moment Showtime begins to take itself even remotely seriously, it loses whatever edge it might have had -- and that occurs less than 15 minutes into the proceedings. The best time for Showtime is no time.

All-in-all, however, even though Chaplin is fitfully entertaining, it fails to touch enough emotional chords to make it of more than passing interest.

Basically, this film is stale -- as unappetizing as week-old bread. With much better fare of this sort available on video (Airplane, The Naked Gun, etc.), renting a tape will be more satisfying, not to mention cost-effective. Loaded Weapon 1 is good for a few laughs, but there's no compelling reason to spend $5+ to see such a feeble feature-length comedy.

The caper is a dud - so stupid and implausible from beginning to end that it's impossible to take it seriously for even the briefest of moments.

At its best, Nightbitch offers a deeply honest, emotionally unsettling portrait of the darker side of parenting. Unfortunately, those moments are counterbalanced by a metaphorical story element that devolves into an exercise in campiness so tonally at variance with the core story as to create a dissonance many viewers won’t be able to overcome.

Hocus Pocus is an occasionally dull, mostly pedantic motion picture with little to recommend it. It belongs on the long list of summer movies that will quickly be buried and forgotten until the surface on video in six months. For real fun at the expense of the dead, see instead Sam Raimi's Army of Darkness.

There's no compelling reason to see Deal. Everything it offers is familiar to the extent where even though it's not a remake, it feels like one.

Saved by energetic musical numbers.

Instead of bringing intriguing characters with real problems and interesting dialogue to the bash, Kaplan and Elfont take the lazy approach of pulling generic stereotypes off the shelf and throwing them into a formulaic plot that doesn't offer one genuine surprise or meaningful moment.

Anyone approaching it today will find it horribly dated, badly produced, and filled with uninspired musical numbers and over-the-top performances. This is the kind of movie that turns off children of today's generation from titles made during the early talkie era.

The Pursuit of Happyness is long, dull, and depressing.

Pokemon: Detective Pikachu isn’t a movie. It’s a cog in a multibillion-dollar media empire, a soulless feature-length example of product placement at its most blatant.

Taken as a whole, Mad Dog and Glory is a disappointingly mixed bag. What's on the screen is passably diverting, but I often felt as if I was seeing only half the movie. With this intriguing premise and cast, the film should have offered more complete entertainment.

If not for Bornedal's stylish approach to the material and a couple of effectively chilling sequences, Nightwatch would have been a complete waste of time and effort.

A prefabricated example of shoddy workmanship.

Feel-good tripe: a string of clichés lashed together by a formulaic plot that features underwritten characters and sit-com style humor.

I have never been a fan of the original Carrie, but, despite the different slant offered by The Rage, there's not enough new material here for me to like the sequel any better.

Several strokes short of a respectable finish.

It is possible to make an engaging action/adventure picture of this sort, but The Scorpion King isn't it. The movie isn't godawful, but it's far from inspired, and, as I sat through its 90 minute running length, I found my mind wandering.

An amateurish effort that boasts direct-to-video characteristics, the latest version disappoints in almost every production aspect.

This lame animated fable, despite having "direct-to-video" written all over it, was released by Disney, in an act of unparalleled greed and desperation, into multiplexes.

The Devil Wears Prada 2 is harmless enough, although it exists more as an afterthought than a legitimate continuation of a story that was fully told twenty years ago after the first 105 minutes.

The primary sin isn’t that Blue Beetle stinks the way really bad movies do but that it is so deeply mired in mediocrity that it’s tough to find a reason to care about its existence.

The narrative contains some clever moments but the resolution somehow feels like a cop-out, perhaps because we’ve seen it so many times before.

And, while it's not bad enough for me to suggest that it should have been left where it came from, this certainly isn't a shining example of Australian cinema.

Seen today, Going My Way looks and feels like a quaint, old-fashioned production that deserves to have been forgotten long ago.

The movie is populated by dislikeable individuals doing unpleasant things but isn't redeemed by the vein of viciously black comedy that made "The War of the Roses" and "Bad Santa" such devilish pleasures.

The concept may not be bad, but there are times when the execution borders on embarrassing.

We have entered generic action movie territory and the idiosyncrasies that made the series special at the outset have been leeched out, papered over, or turned into obligatory inserts.

There's a sense that a much better movie is trying to get out but it never attains escape velocity.

Perhaps in the hands of a visionary genius in touch with their inner child, it might have been possible to achieve something better than an overlong throwaway distraction for a preschooler. In the hands of these filmmakers, however, it feels like a soulless cash-grab – an attempt to tap into the family-friendly frenzy that has emerged this summer.