Gene Siskel

Teenage summer film trash such as The Heavenly Kid makes one root for the leaves to start turning brown.

For years now Wilder has been trying to imitate the success of his mentor, director Mel Brooks. But he has repeatedly failed. That's why the biggest mystery in "Haunted Honeymoon" is why anyone would still give Wilder money to make a picture.

Has a terrific premise but no script.

Michael O'Keefe, a likable enough presence, seems wildly miscast as the young slugger. O'Keefe is so likable that we can't really accept him as a heavy in this role. [29 March 1985, p.A]

To call this picture "Hot Pursuit" is false advertising; "Lethargic Pursuit" would be more accurate. [22 May 1987, p.A]

The story has no center; the duck is not likable, and the costly, overwrought, laser-filled special effects that conclude the movie are less impressive than a sparkler on a birthday cake.

A truly stupid film based on what should have been a surefire hit - a cross-country car race. Too many stars spoil the action, including Burt Reynolds, Dean Martin, and Sammy Davis Jr. [19 June 1981, p.2-8]

Our Flick of the Week is Brian De Palma's disastrous film of Tom Wolfe's seminal '80s novel, The Bonfire of the Vanities. And the biggest mystery of many surrounding this production is why anyone of De Palma's intelligence would want to take a great book - a truly great book - of wit and bile and soften it into platitudinous pablum? [21 Dec 1990, p.C]

For years I've criticized Murphy for not working with the best directors or powerful female co-stars. But he does that here, and his movie is still a clunker. Relatives are listed in the credits; maybe he needs to stop trying to completely control the films he makes. Either that or it's time for another stand-up concert film. [27 Oct 1995, p.B]

Let's face it, the bottom line on a disaster film is how special are its special effects. With Meteor, the answer is not very. [22 Oct 1979, p.6]

An abysmal, embarrassing sequel to the adult-talking baby movies. [5 Nov 1993, p.C]

This is what happens when someone doesn't make a sequel to a hit movie fast enough. Someone else, with a lot of brass, makes a ripoff that is even less satisfying. [19 Aug 1988, p.A]

Whereas Clint Eastwood simply would have squinted at Robinson, Stallone takes a more violent approach. Maybe that's the difference between actors--Eastwood can be droll; Stallone more often crosses the border to primeval.

This is easily one of the worst films I`ve ever seen.

Not as worthless as you may have heard. [10 Sept 1993]

That`s right, Fever Pitch receives ''zero stars,'' a rating given infrequently and most often to a film that is morally offensive. There`s no other way to describe Fever Pitch, which, aside from its multitude of filmmaking sins, has the gall to do a complete turnabout with its ending, twisting a supposedly antigambling, message movie into nothing less than a promotional film for casino betting, feeding off the chronic gambler`s pathetic hope to ''get even'' through one more toss of the dice.

The film's big lap-dance sequence is impressive, however, if only for the sheer athleticism of Elizabeth Berkley's contortion. Later, when she pulls the same stunt in a swimming pool, we recognize the show for what it is--a male fantasy film in which the women are little more than rag dolls. [22 Sept 1995]

Another slapstick comedy from the folks who created Police Academy by ripping off the comedy style of Airplane. [22 Apr 1985, p.4C]

About halfway through the violent, fantasy adventure Highlander, one character talks about how it was the custom during ancient times to throw babies into a pit of hungry dogs. Well, there were more than a few times during this hyperviolent film in which I felt as if I were a baby being thrown to a dog of a movie.

A typically weak sequel that has no legitimate artistic reason for being. [July 22, 1983]

Her Alibi, the disappointing pairing of two fine physical specimens, model Paulina Porizkova and Tom Selleck. Neither is a major acting talent, but both are eager to please and easy on the eyes. Yet, they have chosen a script that is so light that it fails my basic test for evaluating a movie: Would it be more interesting to listen to the actors talk at lunch than to hear them run through this script? Yes, it would.

This is a generic action picture. What also is missing are scenes in which Nolte and Murphy could relate to each other quietly and with some wit. [8 Jun 1990, p.C]

A laughably bad, offensive movie with holes in its story that you could drive a truck though.

A disgusting, artless shocker...A cruel film that offers teen-age girls in peril, as well as a gruesome beheading. Only for sickies. [11 July 1980, p.8]

Al Pacino has become a self-involved film star, and he`s one of the stars I hate.

[Chris Elliott]'s spoof of a young seaman's apprenticeship seems desperate as he piles special effects willy-nilly atop jibes at stupid old salts. [14 Jan 1994]

A hideously violent shocker about a woman who is repeatedly raped and castrates her victims. [18 July 1980, p.8]

Otis` character is one of the most stupid ever placed on film. She mouths platitudes at best; she walks slowly and wears revealing clothes at all other times. If she`s a lawyer, she cheated on her bar exam.