Mistresses (2013)

The casting is key to make these fairly stock situations pop, all loosely revolving around questions of fidelity, although the title--like most everything else in the show--is a little bit over the top.

The scripts are serviceable, although some lines land with a Richter Scale thud.

The acting ranges from adequate to awful. Milano and George have zero chemistry, and George’s sexy stud act, which has bankrolled his career, reaches its expiration point here.... It’s not nearly enough sizzle for summer.

The problem with Mistresses may lie with the expectations it has set. If the sex isn't going to be fun, what is it going to be? It would be good if we found that out soon.

The stars--Alyssa Milano, Yunjin Kim, Jes Macallan and Rochelle Aytes--do the Four Musketeers thing pretty well, and all of them elevate the material. And it needs occasional elevating.

While the purpose of all of this is to urge you to skip this version and try to get your hands on the saucy British original, it's only fair to report that one of the four--Jes Macallan as Milano's unrepentantly slutty sis, a real-estate broker having it off with her boss--captures the Mistresses spirit of naughty fun (never without consequences).

Tawdry but lacking a spirit of fun, Mistresses strives to be a guilty pleasure, but it's more likely to induce guilt than pleasure.

[A] disappointingly thin, damp new series. [10 Jun 2013, p.47]

ABC's more-silly-than-saucy new drama. [31 May/7 Jun 2013, p.130]

The writing is stock, the acting is hollow, and the direction is perky and workmanlike. It lacks any of the clever stylistic accents and camp humor of the somewhat similar “Desperate Housewives,” and pity the poor viewer who tries to apply logic to some of the plot twists.

The plot of Mistresses is so absurd and at times offensive that by the end of the first episode it's difficult not to hope for an early demise so these four women can be released to find better shows.

[Mistresses is] grindingly, soul-suckingly dull.

All this suggests a by-the-numbers romance novel, but some romance novels are involving, or fun, or lively. Not Mistresses.

Mistresses is awash in a yawn-inducing flatness as thick as its quartet of cracked concubines.