Hawaii Five-0

That effort to seem "contemporary" carries over into the plot too: the new task force has "immunity" from the Governor to do whatever it takes to catch the bad guys, the better to keep up with shows like 24, one presumes. They aren't just detectives, they're a special arm of the law that doesn't have to adhere to "procedure" and "regulations."

This is a treatise on personalities rather than systems, its bantering sensibility recalling something more along the lines of "Ocean's Eleven" than "Law & Order: Criminal Intent."

Yet despite the dude-tastic charisma that Caan brings to Danno, I can't quite see a reason to watch Hawaii Five-0 again, given that each week, the stories will probably feel like something we've already seen on 'NCIS,' 'NCIS Los Angeles' or any number of the 'CSIs.' Bad guys will be caught, the team shall be triumphant. Rinse and repeat.

Hopefully the hyperactive series will mellow into a slightly less frenetic version of itself--out of budget necessity, if nothing else.

It's TV at its least challenging, but it has an incredibly gorgeous setting, a pre-sold concept, a cushy time slot, a solid supporting cast and a starmaking turn by Caan.

Hawaii Five-O is nothing but entertainment. It's eye candy.

Still, the raw materials--from the island setting to the underused Kim and Park--have more potential than punch in the pilot, resulting in just another crime procedural with a nifty blue-sky backdrop.

CBS remakes Hawaii Five-0 as just another piece of turn-your-brain-off escapist fare, a loud, action-packed pilot with little heart and less humor.

As remakes usually are, Five-0 is too contrived.