Apples Never Fall

“Apples Never Fall” captures the potential of a beach read you can binge. The scenic setting and propulsive pace are effective cues to turn off one’s brain, but the emotional foundation is solid enough for its central family to resonate as real people, however soapy their struggles may seem.

The miniseries isn’t one that deserves to be savored slowly, episode by episode, so much as watched swiftly and not taken too seriously. If the ending to the mystery is predictable, the getting there has enough value as a well-acted, dishy look at a family whose pit of secrets and lies seems bottomless.

Apples Never Fall provides a healthy dollop of “Big Little Lies” energy, thanks in part to an excellent cast headed by Sam Neill and Annette Bening.

The character studies of all involved are superior, yet it’s the older generation that really goes to town here.

Even if it looks the part, “Apples Never Fall” isn’t the next great prestige limited series. It’s highly likely you’ll forget about it a few days after you’re finished. But it’s an engaging, earnest, and fun trip to South Florida (which is only possible via television).

Even if you buy the idea that all four kids are still so caught up in their parents' comings and goings, you may still wonder things like how old each of them is. We're never told that (outside of one of the kids), although we're told Joy's age ad nauseam. But between the way the story is arranged and the riveting performances by the talented ensemble, this series is still mostly a winner.

It all feels dated and stodgy (more claggy crumble than tangy apple) and there are so many Joy-heavy flashbacks you keep forgetting she’s missing.

It is an emerging portmanteau genre, designed to unite men and women, young and old, in something mildly exciting, mildly titillating and mildly relatable. The result is a show that lacks the crunch of a Pink Lady, but still has the mellow tones and summer flavourings of a Golden Delicious.

The only thing that keeps Apples Never Fall from being yet another eye-rolling show about wealthy people being terrible is Annette Bening’s performance as a woman who is still looking for something, even in retirement.

The seven-episode mini-series is so well-oiled and unsurprising, it just glides on by. .... And if “Apples” were just a domestic drama, that would probably be enough to sustain a story. But the show is also a missing-person mystery that is nowhere near as mysterious as it seems to think it is.

The enduring talent and star shine of Annette Bening as the matriarch of a dysfunctional tennis family will keep you glued to this whodunit series, based on the bestseller by Liane Moriarty, even as the soapy script can’t resist the urge to do the trite thing.

While the series starts strong and captures your interest for five of its seven episodes, by the finale all the exhilaration of domestic mystery collapses. It's more disappointing than angering – the miniseries had the potential to take your breath away. Instead, you may wander away before you finish.

The show doesn’t have anything to say about these nuances of money and class that most assuredly would gnaw at strivers like Joy and Stan, which ends up dulling the story’s more potentially interesting edges.

By the time Apples Never Fall reaches its (surprising, if underwhelming) conclusion after seven hour-long episodes, its insularity has rendered the entire clan curiously flat.

Will it hit with the impact of its stars’ previous successes? Likely not. It has a bit less going on overall. But it paints an interesting enough family portrait to stare at for a while.

To its credit, “Apples Never Fall” delivers answers in the final episode — but one of the biggest reveals makes absolutely zero sense and has us thinking that when it comes to being clueless, virtually all of the Delaneys rolled not very far from the tree.

The problem with this flatlining thriller is there is absolutely no one to root for. Everyone turns out to have boilerplate relationship problems and monotonous daddy issues.

There’s little that stands out to me about Apples Never Fall which, I suspect, is sort of the point. This is a programme designed to fill the space left by Big Little Lies and the copycats that followed. Apples Never Fall didn’t have to reinvent the crime drama to be watchable, but given its revered pedigree, I expected it to at least try.

There’s just not enough story here, and the show never figures out how to balance the idea that Joy could have been brutally murdered against various comic or soapy hijinks involving the kids.

More than anything, Apples Never Fall is just downright disappointing. With grand promises of f—ked up family secrets and over-the-top drama, Apples Never Fall fails to deliver on either front, resulting in a mystery thriller that barely heats to a simmer, let alone boils hot enough to justify its overlong binge.

Apples Never Fall manages to make Annette Bening’s disappearance a snoozefest with an unnecessarily large ensemble, a lack of focus, and no distinct vision. The series tries to be both a family drama and a chilling mystery, only to fail at both.

But for most of Apples Never Fall’s seven episodes, the Delaneys feel like they were pulled off a rack. From all their soul-searching, revelations, and regrets, they emerge barely worn, nearly unwrinkled.

“Apples Never Fall” is definitely watchable, but its plot jumps off the deep end and there are so many implausible moments you’ll feel like you were duped of your time.

Apples Never Fall wastes a supremely talented cast—including the great Annette Bening, who was just up for an Oscar a few days ago—on a show that is essentially two mildly interesting bookend episodes, with a whole bunch of rotten apple mush sandwiched between.