Maybe for the next installment, they can go off to college and find something better to do than making these silly movies.

Vanilla Ice was fairly amusing striking terror into Debbie Gibson when they were perversely cast as co-presenters on the last Grammy telecast. On the big screen, though, he all but exudes irreversible brain damage, as if he's taken too many noggin spills off a motorcycle. [25 Oct 1991, p.4D]

Before you go off to see The Wizard with your own video whiz kid, consider visiting an arcade instead. Your entertainment dollar would be much better spent on Double Dragon. [15 Dec 1989, p.6D]

This unearthed cheapie and fast-forwarder's delight is redeemed by the dubbed- in cathedral tones (they're vintage gladiator pic) coming from our hero's larnyx. [20 Dec 1991, p.3D]

Another 48 HRS. doesn't offer a whole lot beyond Eddie Murphy, Nick Nolte, and Walter Hill's action-scene flair, but are you telling me the first 48 HRS. did? Bottom line: Eddie-Nick enthusiasts and Paramount accountants won't cry 96 tears. [8 Jun 1990, p.1D]

Furry Vengeance is a slapstick stinker, easily the worst movie of the year.

Amazingly, amidst the smutty silliness, there are some laughs.

An unseasonably cynical assault on the holiday spirit.

A comedy that has one good joke, four strange cameos and a spirit so juvenile kids may wonder what Sandler's deal is.

Tedious, unromantic, sophomoric and only sporadically funny.

Really just an update of the kind of hapless grade-Z effort that once played the bottom half of a drive-in double bill.

Here's ringside entertainment for those who think TV wrestling is too intellectual and restrained.

Anything goes, though director Ronny Yu keeps the idiocy on a fast pace.

This is the worst kind of movie, one that insults its audience by purporting to condemn violence while simultaneously reveling in it.

Burdened with so many poky scenes that it approaches the level of the distributor's "Drowning Mona" and "Whipped," both candidates for the year's worst.

Myopic Whitey, continually passed over for a lifetime achievement athletic award, bears a passing resemblance to Columbia's all-time No. 1 animated star, the nearsighted Mr. Magoo. It's nice to think that if he ever went to this movie, he wouldn't be able to see it.

Steven Seagal's acting style is so minimal that we can almost believe a script that tells us that his character's near-death experience left him flatlined for 22 minutes.

Love Stinks is what bad network TV comedy would be like if there were no censorship and less talent.

This genre stew throws in so many ingredients - including sundry body parts that are cut off and go flying, and heads that explode - that the result is a tasteless mash-up that's hard to stomach.

That's what The Bounty Hunter has rustled up -- along with a listless rom-com, a feeble thriller and a supporting cast of clueless characters.

It's just too soon after those silly talking dinosaurs to put up with any movie about a talking horse.

This Paramount release doubles the insult because it rips off the title of one of the studio's best-remembered Jerry Lewis comedies.

Not just stupid, but brain dead.

OK, Time Warner, a joke is a joke, but the time of tolerance has passed. Get your creatures out of our faces unless you're willing to regale us by afflicting them with Mad Pokémon Disease.

Sitting through New Year's Eve is like attending a crowded party filled with pretty people who have nothing to say.

There's a fun retro camp to Hercules, with nods to classics such as Ben-Hur and Spartacus, as Hercules finds himself rowing slave ships and crossing desert expanses.

A car-chase clunker that can't escape its own noxious emissions.

Can't decide what direction it's going in. Some of the time it seems to be a standard teen sex comedy. Occasionally, it appears to be spoofing the genre. It concludes on a romantic, almost honorable note.