Suspense takes a vacation in sequel. [13 November 1998, p. 6E]

But Problem Child's biggest problem is its young star, 8-year-old Michael Oliver. You tend to take such natural child actors as Dick Tracy's Charlie Korsmo for granted until one comes along who should be delivering newspapers instead of movie lines. [30 July 1990]

Lacking even a hint of humor or a watchable story, Disguise has distinguished itself as the summer's worst movie.

That's My Boy is puerile, mean-spirited and charmless.

It's one bad apple.

You know something is wrong when a preschooler's unwitting ad-libs are funnier than anything seasoned comedy writers can come up with. Kids say the darnedest things. Too bad the grown-ups don't.

It'll be 30 years this Thanksgiving since Elvis starred in Blue Hawaii. Polynesian kissy-face has been going downhill on screens ever since. [02 Aug 1991, p.5D]

The comedian's braggadocio here is more wearying than that of the most self-absorbed rapper. And worse, it comes at the expense of humor.

Fatally dreadful. This umpteenth parody flick of the year moves sooooooo slowly, it may be the first movie candidate for a pacemaker. The Naked Guns and the Hot Shots may not be Noel Coward cocktail parties. But those films toss out so many joke grenades, a few are bound to set off laughs. Not director Carl Reiner's latest. He takes the same five gags and grinds them into the ground like old cigarettes. Or allows each bit to drag on and on like the toilet paper that keeps sticking to femme fatale Sean Young's killer pumps. [29 Oct 1993, p.4D]

There is a blessed dearth of dialogue, but much of it is unintentionally hilarious.

The premise was a yummy one in the Mexican hit "Like Water for Chocolate," but it's best to pack Tums in case of heartburn this time around. [5 February 1999, Life, p.11E]

Even by King-movie standards (and there are none lower), the misanthropy, grotesque humor, and all-out ugliness is itself in maximum overdrive. [27 Aug 1993, p.3D]

Spanning the counterculture '70s to the more career-oriented '80s and doing justice to neither decade, this event-heavy adaptation of Scott Spencer's novel may give viewers whiplash.

The 1992 phenomenon was creepy, tense and sexually charged in a bold yet tawdry way. This sequel lacks even a shred of those elements.

Before you go off to see The Wizard with your own video whiz kid, consider visiting an arcade instead. Your entertainment dollar would be much better spent on Double Dragon. [15 Dec 1989, p.6D]

Alas, shell casings, switchblades and severed limbs are all that's offered in this vile film, whose sole redeeming quality is that it ends. Eventually.

A pitiful update that saddles poor Cedric the Entertainer with the unenviable task of taking over Jackie Gleason's premier creation, Ralph Kramden.

Furry Vengeance is a slapstick stinker, easily the worst movie of the year.

Even if you love alien robots punching each other while tossing out insipid one-liners, it’s a painfully long two and a half hours where the biggest problem isn’t a lack of plot but way too many of them.

Any civilization that can produce a movie this stupid probably deserves to be hit by famine and pestilence.

Bless me, Father, for I actually laughed once during this gosh-awful spinoff...about as funny as an oozing fever blister.

Move along, there's nothing to see and no one to root for in this murky franchise reboot.

Here's ringside entertainment for those who think TV wrestling is too intellectual and restrained.

Not since Andy Kaufman's reign of terror has a supposed funnyman been so self-indulgently persistent in testing a fan's patience.

Would not even make a decent five-minute TV sketch. At any length, it smells.

Preachy, manipulative and emotionally barren.

Gere has never seemed more squirrelly.

The bad-taste murder farce is just an excuse for a bunch of actors to go slumming and ride about in - ha, ha - Yugos.