Trapped in Paradise is the kind of dreadful holiday mush that often is declared Capra-esque. But if It's a Wonderful Life's George Bailey were forced to watch it, he might reconsider suicide. [02 Dec 1994, p.4D]

True, most Christmas flicks tend toward the trite and predictable naturally but they just don’t have to be quite this insufferable.

Hot Pursuit is this week's "Paul Blart." Which is to say, it's ill-conceived, not funny, overbearing and not in any way worth watching.

Director Kevin Smith's tweets, jokes and sharp commentary after being denied a seat aboard a Southwest Airlines flight because of his girth were a lot more engaging than Cop Out, his new movie.

Remarkably, the plot has much in common with "Hellboy II: The Golden Army," yet that bundle of fun has enough vision to make even its Barry Manilow interlude seem appropriate.

It's an unholy mess.

Soon, the audience feels its own sense of despair -- for a movie that might have worked but didn't.

Lurching back and forth through time, Winter's Tale tries to blend the supernatural and the sentimental, with a synchronous nod to elements of New York history. But this would-be magical romance flounders, hitting only dissonant chords.

Slap Happy. [16 February 1996, p.D4]

Rather than being a massive foul-up, Artemis Fowl is a sufficient spycraft fantasy that could benefit from the inevitable sequel, and Gad proves once again to be the Mouse House’s Dwayne Johnson, a rock-solid personality who makes everything around him better.

Moore goes into operatic mode as Mother Malkin, a nasty witch who morphs into a menacing winged dragon. The worst performance, however, belongs to Jeff Bridges as a marble-mouthed, curmudgeonly knight named Master Gregory.

The screenplay is thin, the dialogue lacks nuance and the acting is often laughable.

Perry must have felt it was high time for him to try his hand at playing a darker role. But starring in this badly directed, suspense-free film with its unintentionally laughable dialogue does Perry no favors.

The dialogue is beyond clichéd, and performances feel cobbled together from other movies.

The Spirit is uneven, but its campy adventure provides some amusing, escapist fun.

Bulletproof is both offensive and depressing, from its sociopathic mix of graphic violence and slapstick to its severe career blighting of the once-formidable Ernest Dickerson. [6 Sept 1996, p.3D]

Though the tale may fall short on imagination, the principal actors make Over Her Dead Body livelier than one would expect.

Nothing about this rote exercise feels remotely fresh. It's a re-tread of the 2009 original, sans the inspired lunacy.

You don't envy the three soldiers who get shot for desertion, but you do identify with their desire to flee.

The murkiest-looking movie since Ben Affleck's “Daredevil” and about as lacking in charm.

Low on Diesel fuel, though probably amusing enough if you're part of the intended demographic, which appears to be the age group that likes to stick fingers up noses.

Summer School is like summer school: you go, then quickly realize you would much rather be doing something else. [22 July 1987]

Predictable and foolishly unsuspecting characters react in ways that make you want to shake them. But there's an undeniable sense of silly fun in this erotic thriller.

Director Christian Duguay's gimmicky "thriller" demonstrates that he has not begun to master the art of suspense.

If you're going because you want to see an entertaining horror movie, good luck.

Geared to 16-year-olds who can't name the governor of their state, this movie ought to be closed down by the health department.

White Noise is the celluloid equivalent of a bad cell phone connection.

Pratt can do lovable rogue in his sleep at this point, and Brown’s got a spunky young woman down pat. Both of them have some good lines and emotional moments but they mostly feel plug-and-play rather than mining anything new and exciting.