If you're going because you want to see an entertaining horror movie, good luck.

You'll be checking your watch a lot during Timeline. Though most of the cast is strong and the movie has moments of suspense, ultimately the mystery in this action thriller is so far-fetched it's ludicrous.

Rio 2 teems with colorful animated splendor and elaborate musical numbers, but its rambling, hectic, if good-hearted, story is for the birds.

Both leads and young Harris make Crooklyn an exasperating might-have-been, especially given the movie's surprisingly affecting wrap-up. There's no dearth of human feeling here, but a dearth of craft. [13 May 1994, p.8D]

Do yourself a favor and resist The Italian Job, a lazy and in-name-only remake of 1969's G-rated Michael Caine heist pic.

Pure wish-fulfillment for Shaq-watchers who can't get enough of their 7-foot-1 basketball hero. [17 July 1996, p. 9D]

It would be nice to be able to report that Kinky Boots is a kick in the pants. But this conventional, manipulative British import feels like a re-soled pair of shoes that unquestionably have seen their day.

Freedom Writers is an earnest, well-meaning attempt at inspirational teen drama. It has some moving scenes and honest observations, based on a school in Long Beach, Calif., but the movie sinks under the weight of formula and stereotypes.

Unfortunately, someone said "party on" to Wayne's World 2 and forgot to invite any new ideas to rival those that made WWI such a pinhead's delight. [10 Dec 1993, p.9D]

Eventually evolves into a murder mystery that isn't very compelling.

Reeks of the kind of atmosphere that makes you reach for the Lysol.

In its favor: a breakout performance from Palestinian newcomer Leem Lubany and maybe the most apropos use of Peace Train ever.

Aspires to be a cinematic "Sex and the City," but it's more like South Park Goes West.

Fame offers slick entertainment with some exuberance, but it's devoid of soul or heart.

An authentic-looking Jeff Bridges goes for the grit in an incoherently arty rendering (full of fuzzy-focus black-and-white flashbacks) filmed by action veteran Walter Hill. [01 Dec 1995, p.13D]

Young girls will enjoy Lohan's matchmaking antics. But nostalgia-craving oldsters should stick to fond memories of Hayley [Mills]'s heyday.

Every performer puts vigor into an otherwise limp exercise, as if word were out that this would be the last comedy ever made about late-adolescent concerns.

A slog rather than the sweeping romance it aspires to be.

Some of the car gadgetry, Kato's specialty, looks cool...The Green Hornet is otherwise colorless, numbing and sluggishly paced.

Lacking in originality.

There is undoubtedly a good movie in the varied experiences of American newcomers. But it would need to involve sagas more urgent and more original.

At least Necessary Roughness strays from the usual game plan, but it ends up strictly Bush league. [27 Sept 1991, p.2D]

Rodman is more fun to watch here than either co-star, given his array of earrings and nose rings, plus hair that changes color more frequently than the first lady changes her do.

It's a shame the aliens are so preachy, because this remake of the 1956 and 1978 versions of Invasion of the Body Snatchers features a top-notch cast in Nicole Kidman and Daniel Craig and moments of unnerving terror.

Enraptured by bathroom humor that doesn't even reach sophomoric standards. It's more on the level of preschool.

That Mrs. Doubtfire, a Tootsie Poppins for our times, misfires in the plausibility department and mis-aims its well-meaning if muddled messages about divorce doesn't matter. [24 Nov 1993 Pg. 01.D]

There is cinematic art, and there's a good evening out; this is the latter. [15 Mar 1991]

The Penn-manship here is far from unimpressive. But if Sean gets a second chance, he should make his audience care as much as he does. [23 Sep 1991, p.4D]

Though not nearly as raucously funny as the leads in "Wedding Crashers," Nick and Shawn resemble junior versions of the one-track-minded womanizers played by Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson.

In the wine-drenched romance A Walk in the Clouds, Keanu Reeves is like a flat root beer. Decent, honest, but no fizz. [11 Aug 1995, p.4D]

We never get the scenes we really want to see, like the teacher-initiated slander trial or their snotty accuser's comeuppance. Instead, we get too many strained conversations. [21 Dec 1990, p.3D]

When it's not stalled on silly, it falls into slog territory.

Somehow Statham comes out of this improbable thriller with his dignity intact.

With the lackluster quality of its characters — aircraft, a smattering of trucks, RVs and motorcycles — the movie makes Pixar's Cars and its sequel look like masterpieces.

It's about as uncomfortable as sitting through an interminable counseling session - involving two people you hardly know and don't much care about.

A cheap and easy amusement, one that's gone a little stale and never quite rises to the occasion.

Director Robert Zemeckis, who handled visual foolery with finesse in the Back to the Future series and Who Framed Roger Rabbit, is no Ponce de Leon when it comes to rejuvenating a half-baked story. Once Death dumps out its bag of tricks, there's no place to go but six feet under. [31 July 1992, p.6D]

Has some funny moments, silly mispronunciations and comical socio-political references. But it suffers from being the second animated movie this year to feature a dastardly villain for a hero.

Here has a great soundtrack and some fine performances, particularly from King, who is a wonder. And credit Braff with some great imagery, deep thinking and moments of eloquent dialogue, however schmaltzy.

Secret isn't the usual romp, but it's Almodovar's most committed work in years. [7 Mar 1996]

This senior-class Cabaret is just a TV after-school special with a better soundtrack. [05 Mar 1993]

Feels as desperate and static as being trapped in a traffic jam.

As underwater adventure, Leviathan is so much like already forgotten DeepStar Six that they are crusted with the same brine. By the time they come to almost identical conclusions, you'll wish both were swimming with the fishies. [17 Mar 1989, p.4D]

Makes its point ham-fistedly and then devolves into a blood-spattered slasher movie. It also unashamedly cribs from more disturbing films like "Straw Dogs," "Funny Games" and "A Clockwork Orange."

The movie is something of a white elephant itself, a luxuriant, lumbering behemoth. It is pleasant, occasionally amusing - and often dull.

Jonathan Demme's Philadelphia labors ambitiously on two socially conscious fronts - relating the story of an AIDS-afflicted lawyer while exploring a much broader issue. Unlike almost any other Demme movie - it's a film where you feel the gears struggling to mesh. [22 Dec 1993, p.1D]

Pleasant but not more than recycled jock piffle.

The best thing about Black Snake Moan, a song title, is the blues soundtrack. The movie is an absurdly jarring collection of archetypal characters in miserable circumstances with a resolution that feels forced and tacked on.

The Cutting Edge is a sharp-looking but rinky-dink rink romance that would earn 6.0's in compulsory cliches. [27 March 1992, p.4D]

Sure, take the young'uns. But don't be surprised if movie time turns into nap time. [6 July 1990]

A John Hughes movie is 15 minutes of material stretched into a 90-minute feature by a rec-room rack from the Karloff estate; the only question is whether the 15 have their comic compensations. Uncle Buck has a few, though they're typically compromised by the cut-and-paste nature of the rest. [16 Aug 1989, p.4D]

A romantic comedy has to woo an audience into taking a chance on love. While You Were Sleeping is that kind of sneaky charmer, more riveting than ribbit-ing. [21 Apr 1995, Pg.01.D]

While the sound design and spooky minimalist music add suspense, and CGI effects are duly sinister, a climactic strobe effect is more annoying than frightening.

The corny love story is all the more disappointing given the pedigree of the octogenarian actors.

Dull, dreary Answer Man raises this question: Why?

Performances, plot and pacing are as mechanical as the hard-wired cast.

The contrived insult comedy here feels old, borrowed and blue.

Tepidly tolerable to under-8s. [15 July 1994, p.5D]

Knoxville is functional only when the movie needs a bravura comic performance, but The Ringer is easy enough to take.

The longer the movie drones on, the queasier it gets. [6 June 1997, Life, p.3D]

Great movies are sometimes described as filet mignon or champagne, but this one is more like a pacifier.

Glimmers of a fascinating and lively period film surface and fade in the first half-hour of The Immigrant. What predominates is a dully morose, overheated and implausible story.

Even if the script delivered, the film would frankly be overwhelmed by the volume of noteriety that has attended it. [3 Sept 1993]

Does its share of teasing, but amounts to nothing serious.

It is a measure of the movie's lack of inspiration that William Shatner is the funniest thing in it.

A sentimental comedy about mental illness (complete with a sitcom family), wobbly Bob offers further evidence that Disney itself may be afflicted with encroaching schizophrenia. [17 May 1991]

As it is, this uneven movie is more a compilation of contemporary images and concerns peppered with derivative raucous scenarios, à la Judd Apatow movies, than an involving romantic comedy.

Though there's something mildly disarming about a movie this unpretentious, a few more like it might end up turning The Rock into a TV actor.

Though the project, based on the Edgar Rice Burroughs novel "A Princess of Mars," is ambitious, it's also bloated, dreary and humorless.

Yet another foray into unnecessary 3-D, is a rehashed mishmash of Jonathan Swift's 18th-century classic. Mostly, it's a vehicle for Jack Black's zany humor.

The ensemble cast, struggling with wanly written characters, hits more clunkers than high notes.

Snipes seems lost. A key player in the novel by virtue of his first-person narration, Snipes' character - now third-person - is all but a non-person. Mostly, he reacts Watson-style to Connery's Sherlock Holmes musings; an attempt to incorporate Snipes' street buddies into a car chase is the film's weakest scene. [30 July 1993, p.1D]

Intermittently funny. But the movie's first 20 minutes is devoted to tediously showing how his career has taken off around the world. That might be fine if this were a documentary, or if it were done more artfully, and with humor — since we go into the movie expecting a 75-minute laugh-fest.

Despite its ultra-formulaic premise and juvenile sense of humor, there are a few laughs, and the movie's heart is generally in the right place, with the notable exception of racist characterizations of an Arab prince and Japanese businessmen.

Earnest to the point of stultifying, “Red One” offers a busy landscape of plastic action figures come to life, visually appealing and plenty colorful, though as hard as it tries, the movie doesn’t deliver the joy and emotion you’d want in a seasonal treat.

Her (Garner) grace and mystical abilities make for a lonely burden, and we are supposed to feel her pain. Instead, we feel our own for having to sit through this silly movie.

Palo Alto marks one of those rare films that is so accurate in its portrayal of characters that the movie suffers for it.

It's nowhere near as funny or incisive as the South Park movies, and it has a much crazier style. Imagine Abraham Lincoln chatting up a giant milkshake and discussing slavery, and you get the picture.

Director Chuck Hanson, who did The Hand That Rocks the Cradle, provides many pretty-postcard shots of Oregon and Montana. But he should have been the hand that rocks the raft instead of holding off on most of the foamy feats until the final minutes. [30 Sep 1994, p.5D]

There are viable flashes of comedy in the franchise. But with each movie, they grow increasingly dim.

The movie itself IS dull, however. The characters never engage our interest, and the relentless violence grows monotonous.

The film is likable, with some funny moments and recognizable human conflicts. But the origin of the women's friendship is not explained, and the nature of Olivia's problems is not examined or taken very seriously, making her seem inexplicably lost and shallow.

Another 48 HRS. doesn't offer a whole lot beyond Eddie Murphy, Nick Nolte, and Walter Hill's action-scene flair, but are you telling me the first 48 HRS. did? Bottom line: Eddie-Nick enthusiasts and Paramount accountants won't cry 96 tears. [8 Jun 1990, p.1D]

Despite its patina of stylishness, The Woman in Black 2: Angel of Death is sorely lacking in thrills.

Give Binder credit for addressing racial divides even if not as profoundly as one would hope.

Deep within Law Abiding Citizen lurks a thought-provoking movie. But most of what we see on the screen is implausible, superficial and only marginally involving.

It's hard to sustain that cheeky meta humor, and the film seems to just give in and join its slasher brethren, devolving into a string of gruesome, but unoriginal, slayings.

Hanks is a standout again, in a film that otherwise doesn't work. [24 March 1989, p.3D]

There's nothing terribly fantastic about this ho-hum futuristic foray.

The problem is the movie's comedians, who are, to the last, unfunny.

The character played by lead Paul Giamatti is a dead-on Shyamalan protagonist: emotionally distanced and something of a train wreck.

This isn't art, it's commerce. [20 Nov 1992, p.1D]

White Palace, ultimately conventional, doesn't play like any spring chicken, either. [19 Oct 1990, p.4D]

Women may appear a bit smarter here, but both sexes are portrayed as superficial and silly.

Happily, MacLaine (who can pull off these lovable eccentric dowagers while she's sleeping) and Fraser, showcasing a previously untapped flair for romantic comedy, keep Lake on her toes. [19 Apr 1996, p.1D]

It's serviceable, but certainly not much fun.

What do you call a filmmaker who thinks imitating a screen benchmark can make up for emotions that are evading her actors -- Clueless.

Cronenberg can create alternative worlds like few other filmmakers, and that's a real achievement. If he learns to make us care about them, he'll really have something. [23 April 1999, Life, p.8E]