You can duke it out in one weight class in the Champion Road mode, but it’s more fun watching flyweights pepper lumbering hulks with a couple of kicks, take ’em down and elbow them into oblivion.

Slick targeting systems let you lock onto enemies and blast away from every angle: Hug walls, perform evasive maneuvers and slide across the floor all while emptying your guns on your foes.

But, much like riding an elevator with a bunch of retards, the game Seven Samurai is a button-mashing frenzy.

The narrative is a bit thin-there's a new drug on the street called "Liquid Soul" and your task is to figure out where it's coming from-but once the fists and lead start flying, you won't really give a damn why you're doing what you're doing.

Keep an ice bag handy, because you'll press the square and triangle buttons billions of times before this one goes back on the shelf. The final boss: Carpal Tunnel!

The narrative is a bit thin—there's a new drug on the street called "Liquid Soul" and your task is to figure out where it's coming from—but once the fists and lead start flying, you won't really give a damn why you're doing what you're doing.

The actual gameplay mechanics blow. The's game's targeting and camera system is about as skittish as the Howells' from Gilligan's Island would be at the Vibe Awards.

The line "Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules" has never been so fully embodied by a video game.

Humming the words or making any sound at all into the microphone will get you through these so-called challenges. And that's just plain wack.

At times, the game is more complicated than it needs to be (e.g., top scorer sets the rules, minigames within the game), but there are 20 episodes with over 60 girls displaying their tidbits, many of which are quite tantalizing.

At times, the game is more complicated than it needs to be (e.g., top scorer sets the rules, minigames within the game), but there are 20 episodes with over 60 girls displaying their tidbits, many of which are quite tantalizing.

Besides the normal cat-like abilities, you can also initiate a feral, berserker mode that ups the damage of your attacks. Catwoman's whip allows you to destroy objects and lash your prey with an effortless grace that would make a Bangkok dominatrix burn with jealousy.

With eight race tracks in all, and only a couple of game modes to work through, you should be able to burn rubber through this cart in under an hour or two.

The actual gameplay mechanics blow. The's game's targeting and camera system is about as skittish as the Howells' from Gilligan's Island would be at the Vibe Awards.

Catwoman's whip allows you to destroy objects and lash your prey with an effortless grace that would make a Bangkok dominatrix burn with jealousy.

Catwoman's whip allows you to destroy objects and lash your prey with an effortless grace that would make a Bangkok dominatrix burn with jealousy.

The disc doesn't do anything that every other third-person action game on the market does better.

That's it. You can customize your 'bot a little, but frankly we haven't had this much fun since we ran over a bee hive with a riding lawnmower.

This half-assed movie tie-in is so crummy even the dimmest kid on the short bus won't be taken in.

Your average cellphone game is more fun than any of these so-called "events."

This half-assed movie tie-in is so crummy even the dimmest kid on the short bus won't be taken in.

Your average cellphone game is more fun than any of these so-called "events."

Your average cellphone game is more fun than any of these so-called "events."

The only tantalizing thing about Takedown is our warning to stay the hell away.

The only tantalizing thing about Takedown is our warning to stay the hell away.

The game combines stealth elements with brute force. Hell, Trigger Man even has a Knife Cam that lets you steer your blade through the air after throwing it.

The game combines stealth elements with brute force. Hell, Trigger Man even has a Knife Cam that lets you steer your blade through the air after throwing it.

Slam it in reverse unless you're entertained by rolling quarters across a sunlit floor.

If watering plants and making sure the food court is swept is your idea of a grand old time, then this might be the game for you.