This may be hard to believe, but there's not a single moment of drama or tension in any of the action sequences. And the film is made up almost entirely of action.

Regardless of how one might feel about its inherently icky subject matter, Dark Crimes needs more narrative momentum. The cast is game, the production design is impressive and a few surprises await — but even as things heat up, the film somehow remains cold.

Works better as unintentional comedy than horror.

In Godsend, we have the spectacle of three good actors tied to the mast of a sinking premise.

Might be a blast of ridiculous fun -- the way truly bad movies tend to be -- if it weren't so noxious and reprehensible.

A disappointment, but it's not a disaster, and that's at least something.

The Virtuoso covers well-worn territory — the assassin story is almost a genre unto itself — and director Nick Stagliano, hampered by a predictable script, can’t bring much new to the game.

It's an uninspired and instantly forgettable film. But it completely succeeds by its own standards: an 87-minute rainy-day distraction that will probably make a zillion dollars.

Director David Kellogg tries to inject energy into the picture with speeded-up sequences and smash-bang cutting, and the art direction is bright and eye-catching. But it's just gourmet dressing on dead lettuce. The movie is unable to balance Ice's aspirations to genuine adult-level coolness in a story clearly designed to appeal to the sensibilities of pre-teenage girls, and the result is bland and often absurd. [22 Oct 1991, p.F1]

It's a movie that scrounges so desperately for laughs, it features both a flatulent moose and a flatulent train.

At times, "European Gigolo" feels more like an international incident than a movie.

In the end it all seems a little too glib, too easy and not quite true.

The Snowman is ugly and nasty, but that’s not the worst of it. The worst is that it’s boring and makes no sense.

Though the Jill problem is too insurmountable to ignore, almost everything else in this comedy succeeds.

Too bad the movie is spoiling the view.

Falls apart immediately, then limps on for 45 minutes more.

probably less painful than actual childbirth, but it's still a very long 86 minutes.

Numbskull cinema scrapes new depths.

It isn't simple bad taste that Formula 51 deals in, but a total vacuum of feeling.

The Condemned isn't post-modern junk, smirky junk, faux junk or clever junk. It's pure junk, with a certain integrity to it.

A big disappointment.

Dumb.

(Driver) is stuck in a mess of a movie that suffers from awkward writing, a plot with major disconnects in plausibility, an annoyingly screechy kid character and cheesy production values.

About as weak a movie as can be made without actively trying.

You've never seen a movie go from awwwww to ewwwww so fast.

A mean-spirited comedy...that steals the rampaging-psycho-chick formula from ``Fatal Attraction'' and tries to make it funny.

Bakery in Brooklyn is entertaining fluff more suitable for the Lifetime or Hallmark channels than theaters.

Works overtime for just a handful of chuckles and a few big yuks.