UH-UH. Non. Nein. Negative. Sept. 11 is not to be used as the setup for a cheesy disaster prophecy flick.

With cheesy-looking effects including a ride on the backs of giant bees and dubious literary references, Journey 2: The Mysterious Island comes dangerously close to giving books, never mind 3-D, a bad name.

The film is Beverly Hills Chihuahua. The audience is the fire hydrant.

If you're looking for a movie you can take your parents or young children to without fear of embarrassment or the need for endless explanations, this is the one.

Never-quite-believable crime drama.

A slumber-party classic that belongs on the same shelf as "Bring It On" and "10 Things I Hate About You." This high-school comedy should do for its 20-year-old star, Brittany Snow, what those movies did for Kirsten Dunst and Julia Stiles.

Holmes, with Alice Cooper hair and crazy Jim Carrey eyes, looks terrible and acts worse, unless this movie is unintentionally a lobotomy documentary. Whatever could have happened to her in the last couple of years to zap the talent out of her like this?

The parallels between the kids' war and the real one are made far too obvious by Christophe Barratier, who made the equally treacly "The Chorus" and infests the movie with nonstop musical goo.

Comes off as nothing more than a TV soap opera, with overwrought acting, simplistic dialogue and a generic plot.

The whole movie is so ineptly written and directed that its 90 minutes seem to take twice as long.

Heck, it's great to have the big guy back.

While it certainly isn't good, Expecting isn't as charmless as you might have feared, largely due to a cast working furiously to sell every scene.

The Rock arrives with the power of a pebble in the new action movie “Black Adam,” in which the popular star plays the titular anti-hero in his first solo outing. It’s just as thoughtless and rancid as the rest of DC Comics’ crummy catalog.

Watching the film, I did manage to retain my empathy for the narrator, though: I was as desperate as he was to escape the situation I was in.

It's hard to say what's worse in the strange Portuguese drama Two Drifters: the insufferable wordless stretches, or the sudsy dialogue.

Willis is at his relaxed best this time.

It’s a pleasant watch with some solid jokes.

Writer-director Kay Cannon has shattered Cinderella’s glass slipper. And we, the audience, are forced to walk across the shards barefoot.

A cast almost talented enough to distract you from Ted Griffin's gimmicky screenplay.

Entertainingly gruesome in parts, and not without a certain anarchic wit, it’s the kind of movie you pause to watch when it’s on TV, but after half an hour, you’ll click over to something else.

The movie pretty much exists to sell tie-in products, and it's about as entertaining as watching little kids playing with their toys in the sandbox.

It makes "Top Gun" look like the work of Orson Welles. At least the Tom Cruise movie remembered to cast actual actors.

Harmless, fish-out-of-water fluff.

You don't have to be gay or Italian or live in Canada to enjoy Mambo Italiano, but a tolerance for ethnic mugging helps.

It's a simple-minded celebration of speed that pretends to be nothing else, even throwing in the occasional wink to acknowledge its own silliness.

A sporadically amusing curiosity that falls short of effectively satirizing the public's fixation with the minutiae of celebrity lives.

Although a quick summary would suggest that Our Little Secret is the simplest and most domestic of Lohan’s trilogy of terror, the devices that lead to its wrap-up are anything but Hallmark happy.

What puts the bonkers premise of Home Again inside the realm of possibility is the brilliant casting of Candice Bergen as Witherspoon’s mom, a former cinema siren.