Without that little marketing ploy, this is a boring and ill-conceived collection of ‘games’ that just aren’t worth your time of day.

The tired fashion in which the action is delivered is almost as old as the stuttering visuals that blight it at every turn, making this a monster for all the wrong reasons.

Alone in the Dark will surely come to be known as one of the biggest let downs of the year. Impressive set pieces and an initially compelling opening are horribly betrayed by a diabolical control system and frustrating glitches that strongly suggest the game would have benefitted from at least another six months intensive development and testing.

Littered with slowdown, needless cut-scenes and droll monotonous play, Iron Man is as disappointing an effort as Sega has published in its entire history.

Littered with slowdown, needless cut-scenes and droll monotonous play, Iron Man is as disappointing an effort as Sega has published in its entire history.

The 10 year old PC game is better looking, easier to control, has more weapons and features; it doesn’t have average mini games and it has online multiplayer. What’s more, it can be had for 99 pence on eBay.

George of the Jungle is basic at its best and irritatingly flawed at its worst, relying almost entirely on its license to sell to an audience perhaps unaware of the genre’s past glories.

As a rental, Lost: The Video Game might entertain a handful of die-hard fans for four or five hours, but it has no replay value.

Avoid Turning Point, even if it means running in front of a taxi.

As a rental, Lost: The Video Game might entertain a handful of die-hard fans for four or five hours, but it has no replay value.

As a rental, Lost: The Video Game might entertain a handful of die-hard fans for four or five hours, but it has no replay value.

Overall, this whole package seems held together with a cheap sticky-tack feeling that just leaves us wanting to cry.

As a combat swansong for the PS2 it holds no merit whatsoever and shows how bad games can get when a company just doesn’t seem to care any more. It’s not the worst fighting game ever, but it’s certainly close.

Considering the game isn’t just dated but contains more bugs than MI5 (and we had the latest 1.05 version to review, so Christ knows what the unpatched code is like), not to mention the fact that this is the time of year when games aren’t going to sell because they’re merely very good instead of excellent, SunAge never stood a chance.

Not only does Rayman Raving Rabbids 2 cure insomnia, but it improves your social skills as you will need to go out and find friends to replace the ones that don’t want to speak to you again after you force this one them.

You can play through the game in a matter of hours, including the additional skirmishes, and shouldn’t have much difficulty doing so. It’s kind of cool being a predator, hunting down aliens, but AvP: Requiem feels like a budget game using tired clichés and with dull, inoffensive gameplay.

Removing micromanagement is one thing, but when the gameplay goes out of the door with it, it becomes a serious case of throwing the baby out with the bath water.

Dawn of Magic does everything in the RPG book by-the-numbers, only it seems to have used all the wrong numbers.

Save yourself the money and just shake your wii-mote randomly and violently, shout quotes from the series and cry softly to yourself in the corner for an hour afterwards – you’ll look less like an idiot and have just as much fun.

This game has basically been done before and been done better. Even for hardened action RPG fans who are looking for their next fix before Diablo 3 hits, it would be difficult to recommend much about Loki that would provide them with any sort of new buzz.

The Last Prophecy? I bloody well hope so.

Tarr Chronicles just isn’t that good.

The music’s nice though, and at least it looks good.

Two Worlds isn't fit to be put on the same shelves as Oblivion, or any other game. It does bring a new meaning to the term RPG, though, as in Real Piece of Garbage. Just....no.

Dragoneer’s Aria is simply not good enough to fulfil the expectations of the PSP community, especially the hardcore RPG fans who deserve to be treated with a little more respect than a rushed effort that very obviously lacks polish and quite frankly looks amateurish when compared to other games around.

Deal or No Deal is simply one of the most dull and short-lived videogames of all time, barely fit for mobile phones let alone the mighty DS.

Undoubtedly a valiant attempt by Monte Cristo to bring simplistic party games to the PSP, even if it falls completely flat on its face.

There aren’t many space-based RTS titles doing the rounds, but the few that are already on the shelves are almost unanimously better than this broken fun-free nonsense.

A poor man’s version of Sid Meier’s Pirates, and seeing as the other game is probably on a budget label by now, or at least in a bargain bin somewhere, then it’s clear that this won’t even appeal to those who want some story with their pirating.

The limited gameplay with an atmosphere that is completely spoiled by some deviously frustrating design and lazy pathing leads to an experience that for most will be flat and lifeless.

Spectrobes is a suicidal endeavour by Disney, a fool-hardy exercise in boardroom cynicism resulting in little more than a way below par, under-funded attempt to cash in on Pokémon’s “Gotta catch ‘em all” legacy. Of what little enjoyment there is still left inside the DS cartridge, it’s left for the obsessive gamers who can stand the constant fruitless searching, endless digging, piss-poor combat, the rarity of finding something new, the barely existent storyline and even the feeble character designs.

If there’s one thing that can’t be doubted, it’s Wario’s credentials as a Master of Disguise – he’s managed to take a sub-par puzzle-platformer, and make it look like an inventive spin on a well-worn genre. Sadly, this particular disguise doesn’t stand up to scrutiny.

If this was on a PS2 (which it is) it would look dated. On an Xbox 360 it’s a travesty. If the game was actually any good, the flaws might be just about forgivable, but with gameplay that’s so loose it’s practically dangling off the screen, and a main mechanic that becomes so deeply tedious you almost want to use surrender as your main strategy so you don’t have to go through yet another button mashing hack-and-slash session, this really has very little to offer.

An amateurish mess with a painful campaign mode and only a few novel ideas to be proud of.

M.A.C.H is a sad waste of potential that feels like no one actually cared to deliver anything innovative or even competent.

The extreme banality of the package which would only just about hold the attention of the seriously young members of your family for any length of time can’t be ignored.

An unmitigated disaster. Terribly designed both technically and in terms of gameplay, it’s a miserable, useless, joyless experience entirely bereft of fun.

An unmitigated disaster. Terribly designed both technically and in terms of gameplay, it’s a miserable, useless, joyless experience entirely bereft of fun.

Superman Returns: The Videogame is an embarrassment to video games, not to mention the Superman franchise, and is a new low for the quality of movie tie-ins.

Superman Returns: The Videogame is an embarrassment to video games, not to mention the Superman franchise, and is a new low for the quality of movie tie-ins.

Along with the Engrish translation, ear-torturing voice acting and mindless, lifeless soundtrack, Sonic the Hedgehog is a broken, hideous mess, splattered in the middle of the gaming motorway.

It may sound bitchy, but the game is stupid in a way very few video games are: a Naruto action-RPG has so much potential, but this can’t even come close to average.

There’s just no valid excuse for buying Dead or Alive Xtreme 2 when you could just as easily pop down to a sex shop and buy an R18 DVD, go online and scour the adult sites or just spend your money on a proper videogame.

Whether running around the Bada Bing nightclub or a casino, the locations are boxy, linear and woefully outdated in terms of texture quality. Frankly speaking, it just isn’t up to scratch.

There’s a few hours of play in it, but no real fun. L.A. Duel is blander than a petrol station sandwich, but thankfully less likely to leave you blowing chunks by the side of the road.

We don’t care if it’s a kids game that parents will buy anyway, that’s no excuse for churning a pile of badness like this. It’s lazy, sloppy and one hell of a bad game.

Just plain dreadful...There was only ever a faint hope it wouldn’t be as bad as "The Simpsons Skateboarding" or that "Futurama" game, but it is.

It remains a weak 3D fighter, crippled by balance issues and an inferiority complex.

It’s hard for us not to come away from a session of Samurai Warriors (or frankly any Warriors game right now) without the words ‘time’, ‘of’, ‘waste’, ‘fat’ and ‘big’ crossing our minds, but there you have it. The words ‘boring’, ‘repetitive’, ‘uninspiring’ and even ‘ugly’ are not far behind.

We really do have to implore you, don’t let your curiosity get the better of you. Bad Day L.A. is dire.

Put simply, Warpath is an unimaginative, derivative and downright pointless. It’s a clone of a clone, and an inferior one at that. The game feels outdated, clunky and lacking polish.

Astonishia Story is far from a dreadful game, it’s just one that’s oddly devoid of even the remotest hint of charisma.

Aurora Watching is rubbish – don’t even think about buying it.

As it is, X-Men: The Official Game is “officially” a horse’s turd of an experience that’s approximately as painful as Wolverine’s claws inadvertently sliding out while he’s wiping his arse.

As it is, X-Men: The Official Game is “officially” a horse’s turd of an experience that’s approximately as painful as Wolverine’s claws inadvertently sliding out while he’s wiping his arse.

As it is, X-Men: The Official Game is “officially” a horse’s turd of an experience that’s approximately as painful as Wolverine’s claws inadvertently sliding out while he’s wiping his arse.

As it is, X-Men: The Official Game is "officially" a horse's turd of an experience that's approximately as painful as Wolverine's claws inadvertently sliding out while he's wiping his arse.

As it is, X-Men: The Official Game is "officially" a horse's turd of an experience that's approximately as painful as Wolverine's claws inadvertently sliding out while he's wiping his arse.

Just like the game’s music, UberSoldier is annoying and depressing. Almost every aspect aside from the game’s visuals is amateurish and badly made, right down to the overactive physics engine, which allows you to explode the glass in windows and push heavy tables over by just brushing by them.

Plain and simple: if you buy Dynasty Warriors 5: Empires, you’re saying it’s ok for this lame excuse for a video game series to continue dragging everything else down with it. It’s even less amusing than it used to be now that it’s infecting next-gen consoles.

Everywhere that the "WarioWare" series succeeds, Ape Academy fails spectacularly. Where one provides a blisteringly fast succession of well-designed quickfire mini-games, the other serves up a painfully slow collection of loading times interspersed with faulty, bland nonsense.

All the pedigree and ideas are here to make Hammer & Sickle a veritable feast of turn-based feast action. Unfortunately they’re all lost in a flawed and poorly executed example of cashing in on past glory.

For the love of gaming Koei, this is just another mediocre expansion pack for a game that played like a glorified expansion pack to yet more games which felt little more than expansion packs themselves.

Shadow the Hedgehog is awful. Stay away from it.

The gameplay itself is still in relatively good health, and with a good deal of thought and tweaking could be as enjoyable as it ever was, but if Worms is to once again be a post-pub game of choice, it needs to regain its sense of humour.

Even with the game being relatively enjoyable and short enough to be replayed a few times, the lack of variety is unjustifiable. The Emperor’s thumb is most certainly down for this one.

Budget release or no, this is a pretty disappointing effort and a waste of time for most.

If you're thinking of buying this because it's cheap, don't bother, as even at its budget price it's still not worth the money.

You might be more interested to know what Driv3r isn’t though – a good game.

A lot of the good intentions in Psychotoxic are just lost in the mess of it all. We might have recommended the story to fans of sci-fi B-movies, but frankly after a few interesting cut-scenes the story goes absolutely nowhere for hours before wrapping-up in a not-entirely-satisfying manner.

Search as we may, we haven’t been able to find one single redeeming feature in Will of Steel.

Underneath all the tedium, the bones of a very basic business simulation can be found, but there’s a lot of joyless digging to be done to get to it. We’re not entirely sure who will actually enjoy Playboy: The Mansion, as the business side is unsatisfying, the networking is mind-numbing, and the sex is a sad cop out.

Fans of historical RTS games will be far better off with Rome: Total War or any number of other, better alternatives. While nowhere near as awful as Heroes Hour, Alexander is nevertheless glitchy, and feels unfinished.

For the sake of the video game industry, don't buy Goldeneye: Rogue Agent. It's a benchmark for bad ideas badly implemented.

The only good thing we can say about Beyblade GRevolution is that the time you spend actually playing it is time you'll spend weighing up your life, the area you live in and how much better everything else is than this piss poor excuse for a video game is.

The Incredibles will still be an adequate Christmas present to go with the branded action figures, books and random merchandise that children will be finding under their vastly over-decorated artificial trees, even if marginally more effort goes into making a Happy Meal.

The second thing you need to know? It’s appalling.