I'm going to beat my head into a wall until I relieve myself of the memory of this film that was, well, retarded.

For the most part, the film is brilliant.

Cooper who was so poignant in "Lone Star," gives an emotionally robust performance.

Death and comedy rarely mix, and this tedious and painfully un-funny effort by director Darren Stein is no exception.

This isn’t a movie, it’s an outline for Happy Meals and theme park rides. Avoid at all costs.

Insipid, maudlin mush.

Rips out at least one dimension to reduce everything to archetypal good guys and bad guys, or bad guy and worse guys.

The tempo of the film does well to cure the unlikely romance with just the right amount of anxiety and the leads — especially Cook, who is wonderfully promising here — create an earnestly heartfelt chemistry.

Listless clunker.

The plot itself is a disappointingly gory concatenation of two recently forgettable sci-fi thrillers; "Hardware" and "Event Horizon."

It is not quite as stupid as it looks. I'm not saying it ISN'T dumb, though, just not as bad as I think even the studio thought.

It looks like Williamson threw five old scripts in the air and Rodriguez shot the first 90 pages he picked up. I'd like a little more meat on my burger because all I can taste is the cheese.

Takes an unexpected turn towards originality where every other "David vs. Goliath-courtroom drama" only strives.

Much of the animation is stunning and all of the vocal performances are good to great. It's just much of the passion seems to be in not stepping on anyone's beliefs or interpretations, instead of in telling the story in the most compelling way possible.

Boorman’s movies are usually about the repercussions of violence (Point Blank, Deliverance, Excalibur, etc.) but he recreates Cahill as something of a victim of circumstance. Cahill should have been played by Lee Marvin, not by some fat teddy bear of a man like Brendan Gleeson. It’s too bad Marvin isn’t still around, to at least knock some sense into his old friend, Boorman.

Thornton's Jacob initially comes across as the love child of Elmer Fudd and Butthead, but ends up as the best role he's ever had.

This movie best exploits the strengths of the show as well, such as the chemistry among the cast.

The screenplay has a strong sense of fun but after establishing its concept and characters it doesn't know where to take them.

The movie doesn't stink. The performances are good, potentially great, especially Vince Vaughn as Norman Bates.

This is a family film. There's a great deal of wackiness.

While one can detect a genuinely amusing screenplay somewhere under the flat direction and mysteriously stiff performances, the film is tediously slow.

I wasn't in the mood for this film, but it got to me anyway.

I can't really remember the last time I saw a movie with this much biting satire and brilliance that was utterly excruciating half the time.

It’s refreshing to see an animated film remain true to its audience and avoid becoming a Disney-clone. Diaper-loads of fun.

The strong parts are the rip-offs of "The Conversation." The worst part is the lack of understandable character motivations.

It lacks humor. Unlike "Scream", this film is more of a horror-drama, with everybody taking themselves way too seriously.

All of the nutty editing and the loud score just grated on my nerves and failed the story.

A sometimes gripping but mostly routine shoot-em-up about Muslim terrorism in American.

Now the big question: Does this whole thing actually work? Some of the time.

A stupid summer movie.

LaGravenese has an uncanny ability to write realistic female characters.

Carpenter oscillates between high horror and lowbrow camp, which is more unsettling than the scenes of decapitation and dismemberment, and drives a steak through the heart of Woods' fine performance in the process.

A creepy, if disjointed exploration of the nature of evil. But compared to its predecessor, it's also a bit of a disappointment.

The wackiness that unfolds is boring, ridiculous and, to most, offensive.

Take the safety off of the comedy Magnum called Happiness and put the barrel in your mouth. You'll laugh your ass off as it takes off the back of your head...It could be the best film of the year. At the very least, I'll never forget it.

Holy Man is just a dumb romantic comedy passing itself off as something else.

Succeeds at pushing the technology as well as and offering intelligent family fare that won't leave adults bored. Great fun.

Its forced slapstick egregiously mugs the audience for laughs.

What's so disappointing is that the film had so much potential as a concept. The story slowly degenerates into a plodding, sappy bore.

I don't want to say any more about the plot, it's just too much sick fun.

The concept is intriguing and the car chases are pure adrenaline.

Sure, it's lighthearted fare, but that doesn't make it any less of a good film.

The stunts are great but they make sense and don't blow the sense of reality of the whole movie.

Hobbled melodrama with obvious "Terms of Endearment" pretensions.

While the tail end of the film does receive cheap laughs, it really does ruin a very emotional end to a rollercoaster ride that is, after all, a man’s tragic life. In fact, if it were not for this tacked on, sleazy wrap-up, the film would have garnered an even higher rating. Do not let this fact dissuade you from seeing this film. It is well written, well acted and extremely engrossing. Just find out exactly when the film ends and leave about five minutes before and you will be very satisfied.

It's too bad with all of the poker action there wasn't enough time to establish the relationships between characters.

If you were expecting a small art film, you know you're in trouble when the first thing you see is Jim Carrey.

With basically a single set and a limited cast, the producers get the most of their limited budget, particular with a couple of spectacular death scenes.

The movie does a great job of capturing the excessive behavior and the fun that was had but it falls short in delivering a realistic picture of lives after the party ends. Christopher, like Rubell, is into giving his audience escape, not reality.

Blade is just good, plain action movie fun. It runs like a smooth roller-coaster and has excellent replay value.

There's nothing but a convoluted overcast of story with a monsoon of bad dialogue.

Although there are a few other flaws in the film (flaws that will not be mentioned since it would give away major plot points) and the lack of character development is a major oversight by the filmmakers, Return to Paradise still manages to grip you until the fateful ending, an ending that is very powerful and must be witnessed to be believed.

Cage and Sinise earn their pay, but the story by De Palma and David Koepp -- which strains for romantic glory of De Palma's "Blow Out" or "Obsession" -- gives away too much too early.

BRILLIANT and WITTY. Those are two words that will not be used to described this film.

Commercial director Sandra Goldbacher's first feature is beautifully filmed and covers interesting thematic ground. Unfortunately, it also suffers from a somewhat incredible and melodramatic story.

Jackson gives an amazing, nuanced performance as he teeters on the edge of paranoia. Spacey gives a great, toned-down show as I guy who's in over his head trying to find out what the hell is going on.

Go see Western because the first 98% is sly, endearing, and clever fun. As for the ending, do what you did for Aliens III and/or IV: just pretend it never happened.

Nothing really works on any level above mediocrity.

The performers all fall effortlessly into their slapstick roles and the troubadour duo -- the film's Greek chorus -- adds a delightfully poetic touch.

Director Darren Aronofsky, creates an eerie "Eraserhead"-like world that keeps the film compelling even when it digresses into a silly cat-and-mouse psychodrama.

Don't get your expectations up, but "LW4" is a decent enough date film.

Culled from the over 100 hours of videotape Bindler and his tiny band of masochists shot during the contest and mixed with priceless pre-contest interviews, Hands… was far and away the most hysterical and engaging documentary since Spinal Tap, only this was for real.

Sometimes the movie can't decide whether to tug REALLY HARD at the heart strings, or make you laugh at the zany oil riggers.

Gallo transcends the medium in a manner I only associate with David Lynch. It's brilliantly spooky.

The humor is boring and in most spots inappropriate for children.

Clooney has finally made a GOOD movie.

It seems as if all of the new animation competition has lit a fire under Disney's collective ass and they have something to prove again.

The problem is, the main conspiracy of the show is so vast, you have to walk around it a couple of times before you can see what it is.

Unfolding and sounding like a novel, Hartley's ensemble of lower-class losers clash and repel in a startlingly, unpreachy lesson about the importance and danger of influences.

Solid debut effort from Lisa Cholodenko.

David Schwimmer, our whiny friend, is used to good effect as Heche's boyfriend.

This film once again proves that Hollywood has apparently run out of original ideas and is forced to remake another classic film and, like most Hollywood remakes -- big surprise -- it SUCKS.

Sevigny and Beckinsale, looking very Parker Posey-esque here, give solid performances, but it's not enough to out weigh Stillman's smugness.

Does for psychedelics what "Boogie Nights" does for cocaine; displaying in graphical detail the ultimate failure of drugs as an escape route.

It's an excellent date film, but it won't change your life.

Bulworth has the distinction of being the only summer movie that might make you think and for that, it definitely deserves ample praise.

For the single-digit age set, Godzilla is sure to be the greatest movie of all time.

While the film is flawed, lacks desperately needed humor and is filled with cliches, the attempt to explore the human cost of all those cool explosions and destruction is an admirable one.

Lee makes a great looking film, though the soap box message about greed becomes exhausted and overplayed early on.

The leads are all likable, albeit two-dimensional, and the rompish surreal texture of the film, makes it stylishly hip and humorous, almost like an episode of "The Monkees."

Kinda makes you think about how important seemingly minor events in life are. Not really.

A confused mess.

About the only thing suicidal in this lethargic crime drama is the convoluted script that wastes two fine performances by Christopher Walken and Denis Leary.

It comes off as an amalgam of everything that was cool in 1996, when we first saw the trailer.

Kitano treated us to a similarly complex crime drama, Fireworks, but Sonatine (which was made in 1994) is a darker, deeper, more polished work.

About the only thing that is lucid, in the malestrom of wham-bam effects, is the set-up for a sequel.

Linklater reaches for the sky with this film, but the result is mixed.

At once entertaining and depressing -- it exposes politics raw.

The film pursues its sensitive material with the appropriate degree of care, but the direction by M. Night Shyamalan turns potentially provocative moments into dull eddies of melodrama. Would have made a perfect “After School Special,” however, it barely makes it across the finish line as a feature film.

Brilliantly scripted and full of a virtual Who's Who of familiar faces, The Big Lebowski is yet another golden hunk of totally unique celluloid from the versatile Brothers Cohen.

An adequate attempt, but sorry, it's just not groundbreaking.

Hurt and Sewell are both quite believable as their respective characters, while Sutherland's performance is lacking in more than a few catagories.

What begins as a lush, pulpy gothic laced with intrigue quickly spins into a convoluted web of over engineered and preposterous plot twists.

It's charmingly bad and an excellent date film.

Coolio videographer Antoine Fuqua frames Yun-Fat in slick style and his choreography of the slo-mo shoot-outs is worthy of comparison to those of the film's executive producer, John Woo.

Hot Damn! A full-on gory (relatively) unpretensious horror movie!... Far better than it has any right to be.

Best of all, Robert Downey Jr., as Rick's seedy private eye provides a little comic relief at his own expense.

The title refers to your expected condition when you see this movie. Oh well. It'll be HUGE on video.