What They Had

Bleecker Street Media | Release Date: October 19, 2018

6.7	USER SCORE Generally favorable reviews based on 21 Ratings

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TVJerryNov 11, 2018

Two adult siblings (Hilary Swank & Michael Shannon) grapple with convincing their father (Robert Forster) that their mother (Blythe Danner) needs to go into a memory care facility. This could have been intensely melodramatic, but turns out toTwo adult siblings (Hilary Swank & Michael Shannon) grapple with convincing their father (Robert Forster) that their mother (Blythe Danner) needs to go into a memory care facility. This could have been intensely melodramatic, but turns out to be a sweet story of enduring love, sprinkled with plenty of discordant family drama. Writer/director Elizabeth Chomko has penned a sensitive, smart script, while eliciting outstanding performances from her cast, especially Shannon (compellingly frustrated) and Danner (beautifully sad and charming). This increasingly common issue is beautifully crafted into an intelligent, quietly poignant drama.… Expand

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Compi24Jun 24, 2020

One of the first movies I've seen in quite a long time where literally no cast member pulls in a bad performance. Of course, it helps when you have such a who's who of heavy hitters like "What They Had" does. Swank, Shannon, Danner, Forster &One of the first movies I've seen in quite a long time where literally no cast member pulls in a bad performance. Of course, it helps when you have such a who's who of heavy hitters like "What They Had" does. Swank, Shannon, Danner, Forster & Farmiga all act their proverbial asses off and it's quite the feat to behold. Further, as far as writer/directorial debuts are concerned, Elizabeth Chomko can most certainly hold her head high in light of this effort. It's a well-realized narrative from top to bottom, with the last act really delivering on the expected emotionality in a truly effective manner. There are even a few shots and creative choices made that end up lending themselves to the impact of certain scenes or thematic ideas. The Chicago setting, for this viewer in particular, was also a welcomed personal touch. Definitely would recommend this one.… Expand

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Brent_MarchantOct 31, 2018

Exceptional performances and a heart-tugging story work wonders in saving this release from the throes of mediocrity, especially in the script department. Blythe Danner, Robert Forster, Michael Shannon and Hilary Swank give excellentExceptional performances and a heart-tugging story work wonders in saving this release from the throes of mediocrity, especially in the script department. Blythe Danner, Robert Forster, Michael Shannon and Hilary Swank give excellent performances portraying a family suffering through the anguish of a parent afflicted with Alzheimer's and what to do about it. Unfortunately, the screenplay these veteran actors have to work with isn't up to the talent they bring to the table, often falling prey to underdeveloped or even amateurish dialogue and clogging up the narrative flow with several irrelevant and uninteresting subplots. Watch this one for the on-screen work of its superb cast but try not to pay too much attention to the lines they've been dealt to deliver.… Expand

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Bertaut1Mar 14, 2019

Overstays its welcome, but the acting is terrific

The debut film of writer/director Elizabeth Chomko, partly based on her own experiences with her grandmother, What They Had depicts a family trying to deal with the horrors of Alzheimer's.Overstays its welcome, but the acting is terrific

The debut film of writer/director Elizabeth Chomko, partly based on her own experiences with her grandmother, What They Had depicts a family trying to deal with the horrors of Alzheimer's. Very much in the tradition of films such as Iris (2001), Away from Her (2006), and Still Alice (2014), What They Had attempts to avoid becoming too lachrymose by finding humour in the condition and focusing on how the family are ultimately brought together rather than torn apart. It's not perfect, of course, running a good ten minutes too long and straying into melodrama more than once, but for all that, it's still a fine film, with a superb cast doing exceptionally truthful work.

Set in Chicago, the film tells the story of Ruth (Blythe Danner), who has stage six Alzheimer's, and her family; husband Burt (a career-best performance from Robert Foster), son Nick (Michael Shannon), daughter Bridget (Hilary Swank), and granddaughter Emma (Taissa Farmiga). Nick wants to put Ruth in a "memory centre", but Burt won't hear of it, and Nick hopes that Bridget will back him up, as she has power of attorney.

Ruth isn't the central character within this, and her disease is not the focal point; this is a film about a family in crisis, a crisis precipitated by her illness, but fuelled by their own personal problems. Nick has sunk every penny he owns into a bar that isn't doing too well; Bridget is increasingly dissatisfied with her career as a chef and her marriage to a man who was essentially chosen for her by Burt; Emma has little to no interest in remaining in college; Burt disapproves of Nick's unmarried status, and believes Bridget's unhappiness stems from her lapsed Catholicism. One of the strengths of Chomko's script is how deftly she handles the presentation of emotions, with the audience empathising first with one character and then another, with no one depicted as completely right or completely wrong.

Another strong aspect of Chomko's script is how she is able to generate laughs from Ruth's condition. At one point, Ruth announces she's pregnant, and Burt tells Nick that in anticipation of the arrival, they've got out all his old baby things. In another scene, a solemn Nick tells Bridget that Ruth hit on him, but Bridget is unable to keep a straight face, and the two end up laughing hysterically. At church, when Emma informs Nick that Ruth has just drunk the holy water, he quips, "at least she's hydrated." When a telephone rings in the apartment, Ruth enters the room holding a stapler to her ear, complaining that she can't hear anything.

As Ruth, Blythe Danner gives a pathos-rich lyrical performance in which she must react to everything without registering anything. Foster plays Burt as a bully, albeit not a self-aware one; he has no idea how much ideological authority he wields over his children, but the strength of the performance is that he is not a bad man; he thinks he has done right by his children. Despite his bravado and machoism, however, his most salient characteristic is his unwavering love for Ruth. A scene of them exchanging Christmas presents is as poignant a scene as you're likely to see all year. Bridget is, by definition, a passive character for most of the film, but Swank gets a lot of mileage out of playing her inner turmoil; she very much wants to assert herself, but something constantly holds her back. Shannon, doing arguably his best work since Revolutionary Road (2008), plays Nick as utterly exhausted.

However, a number of factors hold the film back. Firstly, like most films about Alzheimer's, it depicts the condition as not quite as bad as it really is (Ruth never becomes violent, for example). Chomko also makes a few directorial misjudgements. For example, the final scene features a truly bizarre bit of on-the-nose symbolism more likely to elicit laughter than anything else. Speaking of the end, there are about five scenes which could legitimately have served as the dénouement, with the film running a good ten minutes too long, and missing a chance for a really powerful final impression, ending on a beautifully poignant comment by Ruth.

These few issues aside though, this is an impressive debut. It's not the best Alzheimer's movie ever made (thus far, that is Away From Her), but it's a fine addition to the subgenre. Chomko elicits excellent performances from the central quartet in what is definitely a heartfelt film, which you could do much worse than to seek it out.… Expand

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Mauro_LanariOct 21, 2019

(Mauro Lanari)
Family psychodrama that revolves around dementia looking for viewers with a similar pathology.

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DawdlingPoetNov 25, 2021

This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. This is a sad family based drama about facing your parents vulnerabilities in older age and trying to do the right thing for them and to convince the rest of the family that you have their best interests at heart. Its about perserverance and dealing with difficult family dynamics. I like that it doesn't sugar coat things for the most part (it is perhaps a little cheesy towards the end) and I felt Hilary Swank gave a good performance. It may be a bit hard to watch if you've dealt with aging family relations with dementia related issues but its certainly a good, thoughtful watch. I'm not sure I'd say its an especially great film but its certainly good and I would recommend it to others.… Expand

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risonyeongJun 22, 2021

i am a sucker for robert forster. i loved his face, the era when men are really men. strong full of presence, sensitive, strong eyebrows.
eventho he is really old in this show but he actually looked better than michael shannon. this show isi am a sucker for robert forster. i loved his face, the era when men are really men. strong full of presence, sensitive, strong eyebrows.
eventho he is really old in this show but he actually looked better than michael shannon. this show is full of good actors but hilary swank did not perform at all. very stale ( Oscar cursed???) michael tried very hard and it was an easy role for sarah sutherland as her role was one dimensional and not the best 'dementia'role, compared to Judi dench Iris. this show was quite a drag but i had to endure just to see robert forster. what an irony of life that he passed on earlier than the wife. after all the commotion of life. what they had..... at last only memories of each other.… Expand

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