Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation | Release Date: May 16, 2002
6.1
USER SCORE
Generally favorable reviews based on 1801 Ratings
USER RATING DISTRIBUTION
Positive:
857
Mixed:
639
Negative:
305
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User scoreBy dateMost helpful
2
FionanMurphyAug 14, 2022
This in my opinion is the worst moviei n the franchise , with Rise of Skywalker narrowly missing out on being the worst movie
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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0
RJFDec 13, 2022
This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. Probably had the best parts of the prequel trilogy, but it also had some of the worst acting I've ever seen. Anakin/Padme had zero chemistry. Total cringe!… Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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1
NoelTingbergJun 19, 2023
Attack of the clones is just sooo bad. At least it has a bit more life then the last one but it annoys me so much that Obi-Wan says “He was a good friend” but all we see in this movie is bickering and nagging it’s so annoying. The score isAttack of the clones is just sooo bad. At least it has a bit more life then the last one but it annoys me so much that Obi-Wan says “He was a good friend” but all we see in this movie is bickering and nagging it’s so annoying. The score is very good though. As a child I was brainwashed into liking this one. Today I am free.… Expand
1 of 1 users found this helpful10
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2
bimmybob2001Aug 3, 2018
Easily the Worst Film in the "Star Wars" Universe. a boring Story that goes on Forever, Makes Anakin Skywalker look like a Miserable Shell of a Human, and even Ruins Yoda by having him do all those Cheesey Flips in a fight scene. shoeing usEasily the Worst Film in the "Star Wars" Universe. a boring Story that goes on Forever, Makes Anakin Skywalker look like a Miserable Shell of a Human, and even Ruins Yoda by having him do all those Cheesey Flips in a fight scene. shoeing us how Stupid we were for Wanting it.… Expand
4 of 5 users found this helpful41
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1
seanreneauMay 20, 2018
Attack of the Clones is the worst Star Wars movie yet it boasts awful performances and bad chemistry from Padme and Anakin.
3 of 4 users found this helpful31
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0
CharlieW.Feb 21, 2006
The only good thing I can say about this movie is that Jar-Jar is not in it... thank god...
7 of 10 users found this helpful
0
AndyS.May 17, 2002
So bad as to beggar the imagination. Bad as in dull, soul-numbing bad, not as in campy, amusing bad. That's right, folks, it's another massive eruption of anti-art from the bottomless well of idiot's drool otherwise known as So bad as to beggar the imagination. Bad as in dull, soul-numbing bad, not as in campy, amusing bad. That's right, folks, it's another massive eruption of anti-art from the bottomless well of idiot's drool otherwise known as Hollywood. The theater was pulsing with energy; spontaneous cheers went up at the appearance of the Lucasfilms logo. The next audience sound, other than low, embarrassed laughter, happened more than two hours later (when Yoda .....). The rest was silence. As we were filing out past the incoming crowd of victims, one was heard to comment, "They don't look happy." We were not happy. Don't waste your time and money on this garbage; and please help discourage Mr. Lucas from committing further aesthetic war crimes by mercilessly ridiculing him and any of his blind, tone-deaf, mentally-challenged supporters.… Expand
2 of 3 users found this helpful
3
benskylerhillMay 21, 2018
Everyone who saw The Phantom Menace had at least some problems with it, and those were voiced. So, when the time came to produce the second installment in the prequel trilogy, George Lucas listened to the audience...when it came to one thing:Everyone who saw The Phantom Menace had at least some problems with it, and those were voiced. So, when the time came to produce the second installment in the prequel trilogy, George Lucas listened to the audience...when it came to one thing: Jar-jar Binks has a minor role with only about three minutes of screen time in Attack of the Clones. That's it. Everything else about Episode II is about as bad as, if not worse than, it is in Episode I.

To be fair, Attack also has the same positives as Phantom: namely, the backbone of a compelling story and certain scenes of groundbreaking visual effects. The plot develops quite well in Episode II as the Jedi inadvertently set forth the chain of events that will eventually lead to their own demise. On paper, it is a tragic, sobering reflection on the transparent, elusive nature of government corruption and the dangers of blind trust. But in practice, it's a complete disaster. With the exception of portions of Ewen McGregor and Christopher Lee's performances, every actor in this film performs with the charisma of participants in a middle school play. And it doesn't help that the dialogue that they're given is often unrealistic and forced, not to mention laughably cringe-worthy. Political drama only works if dialogue flows as it would in real life and actors effectively portray human fear and weakness. There is none of that here, and the potential-filled narrative falls to pieces.

The visual effects in Attack of the Clones are quite an improvement over those in The Phantom Menace, but there's unfortunately far too heavy of a reliance upon them here, even heavier than there was in Phantom. Nearly the entirety of the last act of the movie is constructed with CGI, and it feels like a cartoon because it's used even when it's not even remotely necessary. There is not a single physically constructed droid, alien creature, or even clone trooper. They couldn't even find actors to play the clone troopers? Many of the sets aren't even real. Entire rooms are built with computers, and when it's clear that the characters aren't living in a real world, it's difficult to find a reason to care about that world.

Star Wars: Episode II is an unfortunate disaster. There are some saving qualities it possesses, like the humorous banter between R2-D2 and C3PO and the all-too-short but brilliantly conceived scene where Anakin briefly turns to darkness following a moment of personal tragedy. But what little greatness is does boast is overshadowed by poorly constructed, unconvincing sets, juvenile acting and dialogue, and boring storytelling methods that fail to bring this galaxy to life.

Story: 4
Acting: 2.5
Script: 2
Visuals/Sound: 5
Entertainment Value: 4

OVERALL SCORE: 3.5/10… Expand
2 of 3 users found this helpful21
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3
adriantorresAug 6, 2019
This movie is so boring
the acting sucked ass
The is the worst part of the movie is the fighting
2 of 3 users found this helpful21
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3
R.SmithJul 21, 2007
What was George Lucas thinking? Has he completely lost his mind? As a long time Star Wars fan, this movie was so disappointing. The acting is awful, downright awful, and the plot has nothing going for it. The only good things about it were What was George Lucas thinking? Has he completely lost his mind? As a long time Star Wars fan, this movie was so disappointing. The acting is awful, downright awful, and the plot has nothing going for it. The only good things about it were the light-saber fight at the end with Yoda, and that Jar Jar Binks wasn't in it. What a waste of talent, and expectation.… Expand
3 of 5 users found this helpful
3
TimeOfTheChimpsMar 22, 2015
This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. Although it has some good scenes, like Shmi Skywalker's death, and the duel between Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Count Dooku, Attack of The Clones still stands as the worst of the prequel series and as the worst in the entire saga due to atrocious dialogue and horrid characterisations.… Expand
6 of 11 users found this helpful65
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2
ReubenIsAGodDec 17, 2015
Its awful. It's just gross and unwatchable. Acting is wooden, action is lacking. Don't watch this film.
4 of 8 users found this helpful44
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0
ascoltami86May 29, 2013
I wanted to see more starfighters battle scenes than lightsaber battle scenes like Millennium Falcon from Return of the Jedi. I don't really like lightsaber. I like Rebel Assault II: The Hidden Empire than the movies.
I wanted Jamison JonesI wanted to see more starfighters battle scenes than lightsaber battle scenes like Millennium Falcon from Return of the Jedi. I don't really like lightsaber. I like Rebel Assault II: The Hidden Empire than the movies.
I wanted Jamison Jones to be in the movie.
I don't like when there are too many people,aliens in the scene, like The Lord of the Rings, The Dark Knight Rises.
Characters were quite boring, I wanted to see characters with make-up, mask on, human form Alien, 4 leg aliens, monsters.… Expand
4 of 8 users found this helpful44
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1
Jack97Jan 1, 2014
A step down from The Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones has an over usage of effects (although they're decent) and still doesn't capture the same Star Wars feel the original trilogy had.
3 of 6 users found this helpful33
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3
billJul 15, 2009
For me this was the worst of the six star wars movies. As a matter of fact I wouldn't call it a movie until the last 20 minutes. The begining and middle of this film was boring and predictable. Only the dule between Dooku and Yoda saved For me this was the worst of the six star wars movies. As a matter of fact I wouldn't call it a movie until the last 20 minutes. The begining and middle of this film was boring and predictable. Only the dule between Dooku and Yoda saved this movie from being a big fat 0. But even then it was to little to late.… Expand
2 of 4 users found this helpful
3
robertoiglesiasApr 23, 2020
This film finally gets to the start of the Clone Wars, Anakin and Obi-Wan's strong friendship, Anakin and Padme's romance, and his anger foreshadowing his transition. So why is this worse than The Phantom Menace then?
Because there's a bunchThis film finally gets to the start of the Clone Wars, Anakin and Obi-Wan's strong friendship, Anakin and Padme's romance, and his anger foreshadowing his transition. So why is this worse than The Phantom Menace then?
Because there's a bunch of political talks, pointless moments, awful acting, terrible writing, more characters that aren't interesting, and more.
But this one is straight up boring! You think with a name of "Attack of the Clones" and interesting visuals, you think you'd get an entertaining film. But surprisingly no! 3/10… Expand
2 of 4 users found this helpful22
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2
matta.Oct 20, 2005
I hadn't seen this since the theaters over three years ago, and I remeber it being pretty bad then, but wow, last night when I decided to go back and see just how bad it was, boy was I treated to one of most shitty films in recent I hadn't seen this since the theaters over three years ago, and I remeber it being pretty bad then, but wow, last night when I decided to go back and see just how bad it was, boy was I treated to one of most shitty films in recent memory. With Lucas, it's a given that the dialogue, acting, and story are going to be bad, but even the visuals were terribly shoddy. During some scenes I seriously thought that I was watching "Shrek 2." I used to think that this and the first of the prequels were about on par, but this one is without a doubt worse (Menace is still only a 3 mind you). Even taking this for what it is, a fantasy, sci-fi film, it is terrible. Diehard nerds may enjoy this poor excuse for filmmaking, but everyone else needs to stay away.… Expand
1 of 2 users found this helpful
2
Longbottom94Apr 25, 2013
Even with the reduced Jar-Jar Binks screen time, Lucas' grueling, emo space opera some how achieves the dubious achievement of being worse than 'The Phantom Menace'. Even Though episode 1 was a bad movie, it contained a couple entertainingEven with the reduced Jar-Jar Binks screen time, Lucas' grueling, emo space opera some how achieves the dubious achievement of being worse than 'The Phantom Menace'. Even Though episode 1 was a bad movie, it contained a couple entertaining scenes e.g. The Pod race and The final duel. Episode 2 has the infuriating dilemma of having absolutely no engaging, memorable or even slightly entertaining scenes. Even the Yoda light saber scene reeks of desperate fan pleasing… Expand
5 of 11 users found this helpful56
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3
PahnJan 21, 2012
Lucas should've stuck with the muppets used in episodes IV - VI instead of the green screen CG characters. There's an obvious disconnect between the living breathing actors and those who are digitally created to the point it's justLucas should've stuck with the muppets used in episodes IV - VI instead of the green screen CG characters. There's an obvious disconnect between the living breathing actors and those who are digitally created to the point it's just uncomfortable watching those scenes. And the dialogue. WOW . "Hold me, like you did by the lake on Naboo." Poor Natalie Portman.… Expand
5 of 13 users found this helpful58
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1
HomeCriticMay 23, 2014
A film only good to make fun out of and rip apart when watching with friends. Another disgraceful chapter on Lucas' relentless mission to give people his unpolished mess of his Star Wars prequels vision.
This film is a bundle of **** it hasA film only good to make fun out of and rip apart when watching with friends. Another disgraceful chapter on Lucas' relentless mission to give people his unpolished mess of his Star Wars prequels vision.
This film is a bundle of **** it has everything: bad dialogues, bland lifeless characters, probably the stupidest idea of a romance ever captured on the big screen, overuse of CGI to the point it all looks like a videogame cutscene (like an expensive episode of Command and Conquer) and lore breaking decisions that were outright stupid (like giving Yoda a lightsaber). And at the epicenter of this butchering of the franchise is none other than Georgy, because like Phantom Menace it felt like there was no collaboration - they do only what George tells them to do without questioning his decisions (feels like George is the Emperor himself)… Expand
1 of 4 users found this helpful13
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0
AkashVijayJan 19, 2015
A superior sequel. Star Wars: Attack of the clones is better than Star Wars: The Phantom Menace (but so is smashing your head against the Bathroom mirror).
1 of 4 users found this helpful13
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1
RobobobFeb 1, 2016
This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. THE worst Star Wars film... and this is coming for a life long Star Wars fan. There is so much wrong with this film I don't know where to begin. Let's start with the title: Why is this movie called Attack of the Clones? Who are they attacking because they actually come to the rescue at the end of the movie. This title would have fitted the third film better.
The "friendship" between Obi-Wan and Anakin is not believable. Obi-Wan is sometimes a bossy father figure while Anakin comes across as a pouty spoiled brat.
The "love" between Padme and Anakin is also not believable. Yeah, they're both good looking but aside from that why are they attracted to each other? Girls, if a guy cries to you on your first date that he's slain a village full of people, dump him and move out of town. Guys, if a girl keeps telling you she's not interested but keeps wearing sexy clothes during alone time, she's a tease... move on.
Some of the epic battle scenes look video game cutscenes from a PS3 game. Something just looks off. Maybe it's because every clone trooper is CGI instead of an actor in a suit.
Aside from those major issues there's plenty of silly moments like when Jango Fett chooses to kill his bounty hunter partner instead of killing the 2 Jedi that had their backs to him. Oh, and if he is the best bounty hunter in the galaxy then why is he paying someone else to do his work?
Anakin jumps out of a speeder thousands of feet in the air and Obi-Wan says, "I hate it when he does that." Really? Anakin is jumping out of moving vehicles often or just doing stupid things often?
And the icing on the cake: Why would the scheming Sith master create 2 armies to fight each other when he could just use both to take over a galactic government that has no standing army? The entire basis of the trilogy is just plain idiotic.
There's tons more, but I wasted enough time talking about this train wreck of a film.… Expand
1 of 4 users found this helpful13
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0
BenHazeldenJan 23, 2015
I don't like sand. It's coarse, and rough, and irritating - and it gets everywhere. Just like this movie.

Incredible Thriller - had me sobbing at the end.

0/10 - Ben Hazelden
1 of 4 users found this helpful13
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0
seventhbeaconDec 30, 2015
Begun, this bowel movement has.

Easily the worst Star Wars film of them all (yes, even more so than Phantom Menace). A testament to what happens when George Lucas has complete creative freedom and no one there to question him creatively.
1 of 4 users found this helpful13
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3
EpilepticDec 7, 2014
A superior sequel. Star Wars: Attack of the clones is better than Star Wars: The Phantom Menace (but so is smashing your head against the Bathroom mirror).
1 of 4 users found this helpful13
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0
RDGJan 6, 2015
Worst Star Wars movie hands down. Cringe worthy dialogue and acting. A story that makes no sense and is full of plot holes. Outdated and cheap looking CGI environments, characters and battle scenes. An awful romance subplot.
Lucas made someWorst Star Wars movie hands down. Cringe worthy dialogue and acting. A story that makes no sense and is full of plot holes. Outdated and cheap looking CGI environments, characters and battle scenes. An awful romance subplot.
Lucas made some bad choices when making this film but the worst was giving Yoda and lightsaber and having him fight in a duel. The CGI fighting looked really bad and it overall ruined the wise and mystical character of Yoda from the Empire Strikes Back and turned him into some bulls*** action hero.… Expand
1 of 4 users found this helpful13
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0
ghomasmMay 16, 2009
I am sorry this has to be the worst movie i have seen and this includes house of the dead. The love scene in the meadow made be blush with embarasement that human made it.
0 of 2 users found this helpful
3
JacobJan 2, 2013
As a kid I loved Star Wars Attack of the Clones. The film had good music, CGI effects, and sound effects. I loved the universe of Star Wars and I still do. However, now that I am older I see the films biggest problems. The terrible pacing ofAs a kid I loved Star Wars Attack of the Clones. The film had good music, CGI effects, and sound effects. I loved the universe of Star Wars and I still do. However, now that I am older I see the films biggest problems. The terrible pacing of the film along with no real threat or conflict along with weak characters and story prevent the film from being as good as the original Star Wars films. I could go into great depth about the problems with the characters and the story and why and how their weak but if you want that go watch RedLetterMedia… Expand
0 of 4 users found this helpful04
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0
asylumspadezNov 21, 2011
Taking a huge turn for the worst, This film is prety terrible. It really has no build up to it at all, It feels like its just a bunch of random scenes cut together that they hoped would give a good experiance to the viewer but it doesnt. TheTaking a huge turn for the worst, This film is prety terrible. It really has no build up to it at all, It feels like its just a bunch of random scenes cut together that they hoped would give a good experiance to the viewer but it doesnt. The lead actors/actresses are pretty terrible as well.… Expand
0 of 2 users found this helpful02
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0
doctor2001Apr 25, 2011
Shockingly bad how after he made so many good films could george lucas make this abomination it is by far the worst thing to have the star wars name attached to it.
0 of 4 users found this helpful04
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0
heloheApr 20, 2015
Good points: Natalie Portman is hot.
Bad points: Terrible terrible acting by everyone involved. Boring plot. Sleep inducing politics. Totally unnecessary movie. Plot holes and inconsistencies all over. No logic whatsoever.
0 of 3 users found this helpful03
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3
hoops2448Oct 21, 2011
Attack of the Clones has all the hallmarks of a decent Sci-Fi film, in fact a great Star Wars film but it is let down by truly terrible scripting (Obi Wan's "I Don't believe you" to Dooku being one of many) some poor casting choices (HaydenAttack of the Clones has all the hallmarks of a decent Sci-Fi film, in fact a great Star Wars film but it is let down by truly terrible scripting (Obi Wan's "I Don't believe you" to Dooku being one of many) some poor casting choices (Hayden Christiansen) and an annoying love story that was necessary but thoroughly irritating.… Expand
0 of 3 users found this helpful03
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3
Jedi_JettsonJul 16, 2012
Attack of the Clones contains the worst love story in the history of science fiction and the action is covered in overrated visual effects. The acting between Anakin and Padme was also bad. The battle of Geonosis also had too many explosionsAttack of the Clones contains the worst love story in the history of science fiction and the action is covered in overrated visual effects. The acting between Anakin and Padme was also bad. The battle of Geonosis also had too many explosions and too many walkers and droids destroying each other. It was pretty stale without any dogfight-like scenes. The duel between Anakin, Obi-Wan, Dooku, and Yoda was boring. But some of the action was pretty good including the dogfight over Geonosis between Obi-Wan and Jango/Boba Fett but the story involved too with the horrible love story.… Expand
0 of 2 users found this helpful02
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2
ZegilgameshDec 29, 2012
The dialogue is excruciating, the characters and performances range from unbearable to decent, but the story and special effects are fascinating enough to save it from complete failure.
0 of 5 users found this helpful05
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3
MovieFan123Mar 16, 2012
This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. I was very shocked to see how messy this film was. There were to many love scenes and not enough fighting. However I would not call it the worst film ever but it was the worst film in the Star Wars trilogy. There is however a good fight scene at the end but that is just about it. Also the movie posts good CGI but, it doesn't live up to the original one at all.… Expand
0 of 2 users found this helpful02
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3
Movie1997Dec 22, 2015
"The Phantom Menace" may be a simply a bad movie, this one is unfortunately worse. Instead of loads of tax federation crap, we got loads of Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman having a horrifically forced love story. Instead of mildly fun"The Phantom Menace" may be a simply a bad movie, this one is unfortunately worse. Instead of loads of tax federation crap, we got loads of Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman having a horrifically forced love story. Instead of mildly fun light saber fights, we get mediocre light saber fights. Instead of bad writing, we get abizmole writing. You see the point I'm trying to make. After "The Phantom Menace" didn't deliver like most people hoped it would, you would at least expect Lucas to actually try with the next one. And to be fair he does try to be different. However, he goes in the opposite direction and writes one of the worst loves in history and a story about clone troopers that doesn't go into effect until the last act. Beyond just the screenplay, the visuals still look hoaky, some even worse than last time. The performances are honestly even worse than from the last movie. If anything, I felt that my time was wasted for the most part. Again, like "The Phantom Menace", there are moments of promise. But there's very little of it. Where as "The Phantom Menace" had its good moments a little too far and in between, "Attack of the Clones" barely has any moments like that throughout the entire movie. With a title like "Attack of the Clones", I was hoping for something fun and exciting even if it was brainless fun. Overall, it disappoints even more so than usual with terrible dialogue, terrible performances, a terrible story, and a terribly God-awful love story. I give it a D+!… Expand
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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3
Young_NachoDec 30, 2019
George Lucas proves once again that he should be banned from touching a screenplay. The characters talk like 4th graders with mental disabilities trying to imitate Shakespeare. Hayden Christiansen can't act, and his cringe ass interactionsGeorge Lucas proves once again that he should be banned from touching a screenplay. The characters talk like 4th graders with mental disabilities trying to imitate Shakespeare. Hayden Christiansen can't act, and his cringe ass interactions with Padme really ruin a phenomenal Love song (Across the Stars by Mr. Williams is a god damn BANGER). It gets 1 point for Ewan McGregor and 2 more for my boy Dex (Who is clearly the most CHAD star wars character).… Expand
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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3
superbatMay 16, 2020
The best thing about Attack of the Clones is that it makes the Phantom Menace look better. Though there were great action sequences, this sequel manages to be even more bland and uninspiring than its predecessor. It carries over many of theThe best thing about Attack of the Clones is that it makes the Phantom Menace look better. Though there were great action sequences, this sequel manages to be even more bland and uninspiring than its predecessor. It carries over many of the problems from the Phantom Menace, such as clunky dialogue, boring politics, even more uninspired characters, and excessive CGI. These factors, along with the terrible romantic story between Padme and Anakin, make this film the worst Star Wars movie I've seen to date.… Expand
0 of 2 users found this helpful02
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1
Jk9785Feb 23, 2017
Poorly acted, poorly directed, crappy CGI, and love dialogue that would make even die hard fans of this film groan, George Lucas' second entry in the infamous prequel trilogy is just all-around bad. If you have not seen this film, GOOD. YouPoorly acted, poorly directed, crappy CGI, and love dialogue that would make even die hard fans of this film groan, George Lucas' second entry in the infamous prequel trilogy is just all-around bad. If you have not seen this film, GOOD. You have been saved from the torture of a moody teen expressing his dislike for sand. Do not watch this movie.… Expand
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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2
The_fantastic94May 3, 2017
This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. From my point of view, "Attack of the clones" is the weakest installment of the "Skywalker Saga" and I find it very hard to find something positive in this movie.
In fact, there are only three things I can enjoy: Obi-wan, the pursuit through the asteroid field and Palpatine overlooking his new clone army. Unfortunately, that's about it! The rest is still watchable, but without a doubt far away from being a good movie. Anakin's storyline and the lightsaber duel in the end really insult me as a Star wars fan...… Expand
0 of 2 users found this helpful02
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1
mrdr4gonDec 15, 2017
Staggeringly bad. Words can barely express the boredom that is felt in watching this film. It's absolutely incredible. It's almost like George Lucas was trying to sink his most beloved franchise.
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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2
Miles_SDec 3, 2017
Attack of the Clones is an abomination. An incoherent movie filled with subpar performances and only a few solid action sequences. Attack of the Clones is completely unredeemable. Especially when comparing to it's much better sequel.
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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2
GarethBOct 5, 2018
I don't like sand...the acting, script and the cringey romance made this the worst star wars movie for me until... TLJ came along. At least the star wars lore in here makes sense.
0 of 2 users found this helpful02
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2
YesterJun 10, 2020
The movie is pretty much ruined for me because of 2 scenes. There was something there though, there was a framework for a good movie. Maybe you'll get over those scenes better than I can.
0 of 2 users found this helpful02
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2
Richmond95Oct 5, 2019
In my eyes the worst Star Wars film, even worse than The Last Jedi, why? Simple I couldn't care less about anything that happens, the plot is dull, the dialogue is dull, the romance is terrible and takes up so much time its just in your face,In my eyes the worst Star Wars film, even worse than The Last Jedi, why? Simple I couldn't care less about anything that happens, the plot is dull, the dialogue is dull, the romance is terrible and takes up so much time its just in your face, the action is lame and forgettable as it feels too much like the battles and worlds are created by a green screen. Yoda using a lightsaber is just ridiculous, Christoper Lee is wasted, and it just feels nothing meaningful is given to the Star Wars saga.… Expand
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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0
Mocha13Apr 30, 2020
My first review on Metacritic, only for reviewing Attack of the Clones: By far, the worst, the most rediculous movie I have ever watched. Sharknado and Starship Troopers deserve dozens of Oscars compared to this freaky abortion.
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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3
RobwinzMay 22, 2020
Attack Of The Clones has to be the worst Star Wars movie in my opinion, the movie's plot is too hard to keep up with and the cast aren't as good as they were from before. The only character I think which is enjoyable throughout this movie isAttack Of The Clones has to be the worst Star Wars movie in my opinion, the movie's plot is too hard to keep up with and the cast aren't as good as they were from before. The only character I think which is enjoyable throughout this movie is Obi Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) he's got some memorable quotes but not as memorable as this movie. The fight scenes aren't really that fun and engaging as they've previously been in the other Star Wars Movie's and the only fight scene which sort of felt fun was near the end with Yoda and Count Dooku (Christopher Lee) but apart from that there isn't that much I enjoyed about this movie and the only things I sort of enjoyed about this movie would have to be about Anakins mother and some of scenes with Dex in and he's hardly in it lol. Finally, the dialogue with Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) can be seen as quite cringey throughout this movie and it's not his fault, it's the direction which George Lucas wanted this movie to be in. Overall, it's not my favourite Star Wars movie, far from it.


Also, I forgot to mention, why did they reuse the duel of fates theme when Anakin is going to slay a bunch of Tusken Raiders, it doesn't really work that well.… Expand
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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0
queenstephanieApr 26, 2020
This film is still bad. I don't know why all the fanboys are all of the sudden praising this
0 of 1 users found this helpful01
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2
EddieD.Sep 9, 2008
This is definitely one of the worst movies I have ever seen.The first 30 minutes is completely unnecessary, and boring. And they wasted another useless 40 minutes fooling around with Anakin and Pad Me. The plotline- FAIL! The action- FAIL! This is definitely one of the worst movies I have ever seen.The first 30 minutes is completely unnecessary, and boring. And they wasted another useless 40 minutes fooling around with Anakin and Pad Me. The plotline- FAIL! The action- FAIL! The romance- three thumbs down. I want my money, and my time back.… Expand
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AdamL.Nov 28, 2005
This movie straight up sucked! A 1 is giving it a little, but only for the one scene in the Naboo Plains where they're talking about Padme's old boyfriend, but right afterword they have they'rs flirting sesion and it starts This movie straight up sucked! A 1 is giving it a little, but only for the one scene in the Naboo Plains where they're talking about Padme's old boyfriend, but right afterword they have they'rs flirting sesion and it starts sucking again. Except for Star Wars Collectors like me, don't buy it, it is just a waste of money.… Expand
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1
LaGuertaFeb 26, 2013
The purpose of this film seems to be to give context to characters with little or no point to them, in order to justify selling small plastic versions of them later.
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JHButkoJul 1, 2020
Absolutely one of the most boring films ever made. I grew up loving this movie, I tried rewatching it recently before the newest Star Wars came out and I was watching through all of them. I tried twice to watch this before I just gave up andAbsolutely one of the most boring films ever made. I grew up loving this movie, I tried rewatching it recently before the newest Star Wars came out and I was watching through all of them. I tried twice to watch this before I just gave up and skipped to the 3rd one; Which isn't great, but at least I have a pulse when I'm watching it.… Expand
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2
MichaelBagameryDec 31, 2014
I would have emerged more thrilled from a coma. Don't misunderstand me; this is better than 'The Phantom Menace', but only less bad rather than actually good. The opening chase is fun, but immediately after it's over, the movie pretty muchI would have emerged more thrilled from a coma. Don't misunderstand me; this is better than 'The Phantom Menace', but only less bad rather than actually good. The opening chase is fun, but immediately after it's over, the movie pretty much flatlines. The acting is weak and the story is really only there as an excuse to show off the CG. Methinks George Lucas wasn't prepared for the backlash against 'The Phantom Menace'.… Expand
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2
marcmyworksDec 27, 2015
I don't think there are enough words to explain how much I hate this film. It doesn't mean I won't try. I loothe this movie, from its incredible bad dialogue, to its unnecessary use of CGI (the chairs in Amadala's room? Really?). I would haveI don't think there are enough words to explain how much I hate this film. It doesn't mean I won't try. I loothe this movie, from its incredible bad dialogue, to its unnecessary use of CGI (the chairs in Amadala's room? Really?). I would have hoped after the disaster of Episode 1 George Lucas may have decided to bring a bit back of what was loved. Unfortunately it just doesn't work.… Expand
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3
GamerMxNov 28, 2015
Es en este episodio donde conoceriamos al mejor y mas poderoso jedi de todos, en cambio nos regalan la vision imborrable de un puberto insufrible, estupido y pedante que hace imposible cualquier empatia, como es que este inepto se convirtioEs en este episodio donde conoceriamos al mejor y mas poderoso jedi de todos, en cambio nos regalan la vision imborrable de un puberto insufrible, estupido y pedante que hace imposible cualquier empatia, como es que este inepto se convirtio en Darth Vader?… Expand
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3
Red-Opposom-098May 18, 2015
Worst in the series, instead of it being a memorable Star Wars film it decides to be a forgettable love story. I'm not one to bash on the prequels (I really liked Ep 3) but this is one of the worst Star Wars movies and one of the worst moviesWorst in the series, instead of it being a memorable Star Wars film it decides to be a forgettable love story. I'm not one to bash on the prequels (I really liked Ep 3) but this is one of the worst Star Wars movies and one of the worst movies of all time (in my opinion). The battle between all the Jedi is kinda cool I guess, but the main story is just so forced down your throughout, and the dialogue is even worse. There isn't anything good about this movie.… Expand
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TJAWNov 18, 2018
The Phantom Menace was abysmal enough, but Attack of the Clones is somehow even worse; this film improves upon its predecessor in just one way: There's much less of Jar-Jar Binks, the worst Star Wars character ever devised. But in absolutelyThe Phantom Menace was abysmal enough, but Attack of the Clones is somehow even worse; this film improves upon its predecessor in just one way: There's much less of Jar-Jar Binks, the worst Star Wars character ever devised. But in absolutely every other way, Attack of the Clones makes The Phantom Menace look somewhat okay in comparison. The film is filled with absolutely horrible acting (most notably the atrocity of a performance from Hayden Christiansen), a disastrously over-complicated story, truly embarrassing dialogue, soulless characters, nauseating attempts at romance, more severely dated and fake CGI, mindless plot threads and scenes that go nowhere, and some of the most ridiculous and stupid-looking action sequences in the series.… Expand
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3
morganstephens5Aug 10, 2015
The worst Star Wars film by far. Anybody who disagrees with this claim is simply in denial. I thought Phantom Menace was a decent starting film that is underrated. This one is overrated for even simply having a higher score than Menace onThe worst Star Wars film by far. Anybody who disagrees with this claim is simply in denial. I thought Phantom Menace was a decent starting film that is underrated. This one is overrated for even simply having a higher score than Menace on this site. The story wasn't there, the acting was worse and the characters don't make me care really. Besides Obi Won, who was a great character with what was given to him. The scene with Yoda hoping around was terrible and the action isn't good at all. Jango Fett was a alright character that was thrown aside after one film. Very much like Darth Maul. The effects were actually even worse in this one than the other films by far. The story in this one also makes very little to no sense and just sort of makes you role your eyes. At least it gets better from here.… Expand
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2
MrMovieBuffJan 3, 2016
"I don't like sand, it's coarse, rough, it's irritating. And it gets everywhere" The wise words of our hopeless hero in George Lucas' 'Star Wars: Attack of the Clones', the second installment of the prequel trilogy.

The second feature"I don't like sand, it's coarse, rough, it's irritating. And it gets everywhere" The wise words of our hopeless hero in George Lucas' 'Star Wars: Attack of the Clones', the second installment of the prequel trilogy.

The second feature focuses on our "hero"(?) Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) as he is still training to become a true Jedi, thanks to the lessons of the legendary Obi Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor). But, only one thing seems to bother our now grown-up hero, he is still infatuated with Padme (Natalie Portman), even though Jedi are not supposed to fall in love.

While the CGI continues to improve and still looks impressive (this was made in 2002), that isn't enough to hie the stiff acting, mostly coming from the lead actor, Christensen. Every line of dialogue, once again, is like poetry, so you can't blame him for having a bit of trouble making these lines sound convincing, lines such as; "I'm haunted by the kiss, that you should never have given me", Lucas, what ever happened to just the simple "You shouldn't have kissed me...that was bad"? Do you really expect your actors to give good performances with these lines?

Ewan McGregor is the reason why you should continue to watch this movie, his presence, and convincing performance makes me glad that he is just there. The movie lights up whenever he is on screen, and you cannot help but wonder why McGregor is still part of this tragedy of a series.

The main enemy is Count Dooku (Christopher Lee), and he gives another great performance, as expected. My issue is that, he doesn't seem to be a memorable villain in the "Star Wars" canon. Maybe it's because he is mentioned in the crawl text sequence, but doesn't show up until way after the half-way point of the film.

Another issue with this movie is the forced romance between Christensen and Portman. I'm not sure if it is because of the dialogue, or Christensen's stiff acing, but you just feel disconnected and uninterested in their romance. They could get together, they could die, it doesn't matter, nobody cares.

There are a lot more droids in this movie, and they seem more human than Hayden Christensen...maybe Christensen would have been better off playing a droid than Anakin Skywalker.

This has got to be the most boring "Star Wars" movie ever made. I remember when I first saw this movie years ago, and all I could do was wait for the end credits...I would rather watch the end credits of this movie than the movie itself. The reason I reluctantly used the word "boring" was because this movie is nothing but people talking to each other, and that it keeps shifting back and forth to Obi Wan doing something, and then Anakin and Padme doing something else. There is just nothing else interesting going on here.

One more problem, without spoilers, is that there is this one death scene that occurs and it's supposed to be emotional, of course, like most death scenes. But the acting is so unconvincing, that it just seems pointless and that they're trying too hard.

All in all, 'Star Wars: Attack of the Clones' is the worst movie in the iconic "Star Wars" franchise.… Expand
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3
MovieManiac83Apr 24, 2015
The collective fever that characterized the countdown to The Phantom Menace had long since dissipated by the time the first sequel prequel rolled off the ILM production line. Casual spectators, once stung, had decamped en masse to the newlyThe collective fever that characterized the countdown to The Phantom Menace had long since dissipated by the time the first sequel prequel rolled off the ILM production line. Casual spectators, once stung, had decamped en masse to the newly discovered Middle-Earth, leaving George Lucas with just the few million hardcore fans - true believers who, with all the apprehension of parents at a nativity play, willed their defrocked hero back towards respectability.

There are certainly stretches in the patchy Attack Of The Clones when Lucas’ flat-packed dialogue struggles to keep the hecklers quiet – Anakin’s seduction of the former Queen has all the charm of a teenage lunge behind the bike-sheds and none of the feeling – but by the time climactic ‘reel six’ cranks into high gear the saga’s reputation as the godfather of modern sci-fi spectacle is more or less restored. Indeed, when Yoda finally unsheathes his mini-saber and kicks Sith ass the faithful can reliably be found standing on seats hollering as if the outcome was never in doubt. But, as the little Jedi might say, in doubt it was.

Where Episode V fairly zipped around the galaxy with all the breezy confidence of youth, unafraid to travel anywhere, even dark places, the second middle child of the saga is saddled with an altogether heavier burden from which it struggles to escape. Empire hits the ground running on ice planet Hoth, Clones however, has a truly cold start to contend with, aware perhaps that the movie’s most pressing task is to simply atone for the more egregious sins of Episode I. Thus, Jar Jar is quickly sidelined, the upgraded CGI Yoda gets a showcase and those damn Amidala-clones are killed off on page one. On Coruscant we also meet the grown-up ‘Ani’ - okay so he’s a whiny teenager but that’s still a vast improvement on the bowl-haired moppet the world was asked to root for in 1999.

Also more powerful than when last we met is Ewan McGregor’s Obi-Wan, the Jedi who was simply wan in Menace is a much more forceful presence as a full-bearded Master, struggling manfully with the endless exposition and even landing the odd punchline.

Matters improve greatly in the final forty minutes: Christopher Lee’s Count Dooku arrives to provide some much needed gravitas, C-3PO turns up to do his C-3PO thing and Padme puts on a skin-tight white leotard. Best of all, Lucas finally cuts loose. The classic trilogy bristled with seat-of-your-pants filmmaking, our heroes bouncing from cliffhanger to cliffhanger, and in the final section of Episode II – almost four hours into this prequel enterprise - Lucas at last cranks up to this Saturday morning serial pace: from the Tex Avery goofiness of the droid factory, to the Cecil B. De Mille grandeur of the gladiator arena, the action never lets up.

Also in the last reel we finally get to divine something of Lucas’ grand design, with ironic pay-offs for the fans still paying close attention - it is the witless Jar Jar who makes the creation of a clone army possible and Yoda who first leads what will become Stormtroopers into battle. In its own way, the end of Episode II is every bit as dark as the famous end of Episode V.

The middle episode that can make a virtue of its bridging role is rare indeed. And where The Empire Strikes Back dazzled with vertiginous cliffhangers, Clones is more typical of the breed, necessary but not vital. However, as we make the awkward journey through Anakin’s teenage trials a sparkling digital print ensures there is still much to marvel at, not least a little green fella who is surprisingly quick on the draw.… Expand
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TheGingerDragonJun 12, 2015
This is by far the worst star wars anything that has ever existed. Hayden Christensen is an absolutely awful actor, and shows no emotion or feeling aside from the occasional smile, which makes him look like a sex criminal. His romance withThis is by far the worst star wars anything that has ever existed. Hayden Christensen is an absolutely awful actor, and shows no emotion or feeling aside from the occasional smile, which makes him look like a sex criminal. His romance with Natalie Portman is creepy and unnatural, and the dialogue between them is just plain awful. Every sort of cool star wars creature or ship is badly cg i-ed , including C3PO and R2-D2 (which is just crossing the line). Almost every background is obviously green screen, and the few costumes they actually use are half-assed. And if you're thinking "Oh, the cool sci-fi battle scenes will make up for all that other stuff", than, sorry to disappoint you, but there are about 3 battle scenes across the entire movie, all of which are completely CG I-ed (with really awkward movements that don't make sense). The only thing mildly enjoyable was Samuel L. Jackson. All in all, this was a terrible, awful let down that did more than disappoint star wars fans. The damn thing gave me a headache.… Expand
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YorkManMar 10, 2016
Attack of the Clones (AotC) is the absolute nadir of the franchise. Although The Phantom Menace was bad, it was the start of a new trilogy and as such was primarily setting up characters and the universe. OK, it introduced two of the mostAttack of the Clones (AotC) is the absolute nadir of the franchise. Although The Phantom Menace was bad, it was the start of a new trilogy and as such was primarily setting up characters and the universe. OK, it introduced two of the most hated aspects of the franchise (Jar Jar Binks, and the idea of 'Midichlorians'), but there was enough action and some pretty good set pieces. Throw in John Williams best piece of music since Raiders of the Lost Ark (Duel of the Fates), and there was a real buzz that the second part of the trilogy could exceed expectations, if.... IF... George Lucas took on board what the viewers liked and (more importantly) disliked about TPM.

But, George Lucas didn't do that.

Instead he came up with one of the most hated films of all time.
Virtually everything about the movie is awful. From the lacklustre, by the numbers, boring direction, to the slow paced, tiresome, almost nonsensical plot. The editing is atrocious, the score is bland, the overuse of CGI/Green screen, the truly inept comedic moments..... And that's not even mentioning the worst part of all.... The casting of Hayden Christensen in the pivotal/vital role of the now teenage Anakin Skywalker.

The plot revolves around the fact the Jedi can no longer use the Force to see images of the future. The Dark Side has compromised their abilities, and as such the Jedi are making decisions blindly.

As a consequence, despite it making no sense, they charge Anakin with the protection of Senator (formerly Queen) Amidala, and they go for a romantic vacation to Naboo. Meanwhile Obi-Wan is tasked with uncovering a conspiracy surrounding a planet removed from the Jedi archive, due to it being the home of the assassin who is trying to kill the Senator.

At the same time the evil Darth Sideous/Chancellor Palpatine is maneouvering the political side of things, stirring up trouble in the senate, whilst promoting the increasingly aggressive acts of violence by a separatist group (under the control of former Jedi Count Dooku, but now Dark Jedi (and Sideous' new apprentice) Darth Tyranus).

The three parallel storylines unfold, with Anakin and Padme Amidala falling in love, Obi-Wan discovering a secret clone army, and Count Dooku/Palpatine causing political ructions.
The film builds up to a climax on an industrial planet, where all Hell breaks loose and we get the obligatory big fight scenes and subdued ending.

When you write down the basic plot synopsis, it doesn't sound so bad. And I suspect, on paper, George Lucas thought so too.
But, the actual finished product is simply horrific.
As mentioned, the entire plot makes no sense, there are innumerate plotholes, as well as moments where you just say 'well, why didn't he/she/they just do this instead?' as you stare blankly at the screen in disbelief at the stupidity of virtually every character in the film.

Anyway, back to Hayden Christensen. He's shown he can act, in other subsequent films. but in AotC he's more wooden than the Black Forest, and appears to have no idea what he's doing.
But then again, it doesn't help that he (and everyone else) is working from one of the most terrible scripts ever written. It's almost as if George Lucas was unable (as both director/writer) to imagine his actors expressing emotion through their acting/vocal range/physical expressions etc. So, he instead chose to actually have the characters simply state their emotional point of view. In most cases it's cringeworthy, in some (Hayden Christensen, I'm talking about you!!) it's unintentionally hilarious.

I'm being extremely critical, but that's because there are people out there (read some of the other 'reviews') who think that the original Trilogy is some kind of masterwork.... These people need to take a step back and either admit they were wrong, or offer up some real arguments/points about why they would give this movie anything other than a well-deserved low score!!

Are there any good points?? Well, there's far less Jar Jar, and Midichlorians (whilst mentioned) are played down immensely. It's also good to see a large group of Jedi in action, at the peak of their powers... Even if they are just waving waving sticks in a choreographed manner in front of a green screen.... It still has some resonance, and is as close as Star Wars ever got to really putting the Jedi (as this mythical group of warriors) on-screen.
But apart from those things....It's pretty much the crap-fest I've explained it to be. Ultimately, I suspect people on this site will have seen the movie, and if someone hasn't, they'll more than likely pull up some official review from YouTube, or look up something on Google...
So, it's just been about me expressing my opinions, in the hope someone has a look.… Expand
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FLaaVEnAug 11, 2020
Pretty boring star wars movie overall. The only good things in there are all of the geonosis scenes.
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FilmMasterEdJan 5, 2016
Is the magic back? Not without a price, baby. The Star Wars engine has been stalled for so long, you have to trudge through nearly an hour of Episode II - Attack of the Clones just to hear it cough and turn over. Still, the Force againstIs the magic back? Not without a price, baby. The Star Wars engine has been stalled for so long, you have to trudge through nearly an hour of Episode II - Attack of the Clones just to hear it cough and turn over. Still, the Force against dullness is finally goosing George Lucas. To alleviate his usual cornball jokes and solemn mythmaking, Lucas throws in Jedi love (who knew Jedis take a vow not to screw?). And check out the babe casting of the lovers: Natalie Portman as queen turned senator Padme Amidala, decked out in belly-baring outfits Britney would envy, and Hayden Christensen as hotheaded Jedi-in-training Anakin (Darth Vader's inside me somewhere) Skywalker. Clones is crammed with action, grand digital design and a dark side Lucas hasn't flaunted since 1980's The Empire Strikes Back. Death, dismemberment, lost mommies, demon daddies and Freudian subtext are a huge improvement over the Jar Jar juvenilia that blighted 1999's Phantom Menace — a prequel that everyone saw and no one wants to remember.

The big problem, aside from the fact that The Matrix and The Lord of the Rings outclassed Lucas at his own game, is talk, talk, talk. Even with script help from Jonathan Hales, Lucas still can't write dialogue that doesn't induce projectile vomiting. And the film's visual snap (it was all shot digitally) leaves emotions at a chilly remove. What helps are the cool gadgets and cooler villains, notably the great Christopher Lee as Count Dooku and New Zealander Temuera Morrison as bounty hunter Jango Fett, daddy to clone son Boba (Daniel Logan). Even Ewan McGregor has stopped playing Jedi master Obi-wan Kenobi with a stick up his ass.

The plot? Don't tell me you want to hear that there's unrest in the galactic Senate, that Count Dooku's separatist movement is a threat to the limited number of Jedi knights, that... help, my eyes are glazing over.

The point is: It's war, and Lucas pulls out all the stops when the separatists and their battle droids take on the Republic and its clone army. It's a treat to see that old troll Yoda stop overstating the obvious ("Begun, this Clone War has") and start kicking separatist ass. The climactic duel between Yoda (no longer a puppet but a digital warrior) and Count Dooku is a rouser. As is the arena faceoff that pits Anakin, Padme and Obi-wan against three digital monsters, a mere warmup to the big battle led by Jedi master Mace Windu (Samuel L. Jackson). Lucas delivers the fireworks, from asteroid showers to air speeders and swoop bikes, but it's overkill. Much more should have been made of the relationship between Jango, the template for the clone army, and Boba, the young son he loves and corrupts. Much less should have been made of the insufferably coy banter between Anakin and Padme. It's only when tragedy intrudes that Portman (the Lolita-ish star of The Professional) and Christensen (best known as the teen who earned drug money by letting middle-age men blow him in Life As a House) strike harsher, truer notes. Clones ends with a wedding for the future parents of Luke and Princess Leia. But it's the glimpse of Darth Vader that Lucas gives us in Anakin — traumatized by the murder of his mother and capable of killing innocents — that reminds us of the dark power Star Wars exerted before it became a franchise. It's about time.… Expand
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ReelViews94Mar 23, 2016
In many ways, George Lucas has only his success to blame. As one of the leading lights of the digital movement, Lucas and his effects wizards at Industrial Light & Magic have made miracles look a little more commonplace with every passingIn many ways, George Lucas has only his success to blame. As one of the leading lights of the digital movement, Lucas and his effects wizards at Industrial Light & Magic have made miracles look a little more commonplace with every passing year, by turning out CGI worlds so awesome that awe alone is beginning to show its limitations. In Attack Of The Clones, a turgid and uninspired entry in the diminishing Star Wars pantheon, virtually every shot has been designed to introduce jaws to the pavement, with dense cityscapes that stretch to infinity in all directions and breathtaking panoramas that put nature's best to shame. But without the mythical power or giddy adventurousness of the first two Star Wars movies, the impact is strangely numbing, like watching a two-and-a-half-hour ILM show reel in search of moneyed investors. Though a marginal improvement over 1999's The Phantom Menace—if only because it pushes infamous clearance-bin sidekick Jar-Jar Binks to the margins—Attack Of The Clones runs into a similar set of problems, mainly caused by characters opening their mouths to speak. Never a competent director of actors, who often look stiff and disoriented against the blue-screen backdrops, Lucas gets little help from Hayden Christensen, his choice to bring young Anakin Skywalker from precocious childhood into petulant adolescence. As a gifted Jedi under the strict tutelage of Ewan McGregor's Obi-Wan Kenobi, Christensen pouts and glowers at the camera every time the Dark Side tempts him, which happens a lot when he oversteps his bounds to stop a faction of separatists that threatens the stability of the Republic. Assigned to protect Natalie Portman, former Queen and now Senator of the peace-loving planet Naboo, Christensen breaks the Jedi code by falling in love with her, though no amount of frolicking and flowery dialogue can get those feelings across. Away from their square courtship, McGregor looks far more comfortable and commanding this time as Kenobi, whose investigation of an attempt on Portman's life leads him to a larger plot involving a bounty hunter (Temuera Morrison), a former Jedi (Christopher Lee), and a massive clone army. Lucas and his technicians sweat heavily over the eye candy, crafting amazingly detailed worlds and opulent interior spaces that wouldn't have been possible before the digital age. But save for a crowd-pleasing moment with Yoda, the movie remains pretty and inert, with no authentic emotion, no cumulative power, and no sense of physicality and danger in the action sequences. In lieu of a proper climax, Attack Of The Clones ends with a tantalizing cliffhanger for the next episode, but Lucas' lumbering series is presenting fewer and fewer reasons to tune in.… Expand
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MovieMasterEddyApr 3, 2016
“Star Wars: Episode II — Attack of the Clones” could be one the worst movies ever made and still it would have the faithful rallying around the Lucas franchise, brandishing their light sabers like bayonets. Against that army of formidable“Star Wars: Episode II — Attack of the Clones” could be one the worst movies ever made and still it would have the faithful rallying around the Lucas franchise, brandishing their light sabers like bayonets. Against that army of formidable opponents, it seems like a waste of breath to point out the flaws in a movie that isn’t really a movie at all: truncated sequences that don’t string together into a coherent story, dialogue that may as well have been cobbled together out of pieces of wood instead of words, love scenes shot to look like douche commercials. At this point, George Lucas can put whatever he wants on-screen and get away with it. He has become the ruler of the universe, at least the one between his ears; his wish is our command.

Anyone who dares criticize Lucas has to be prepared for an onslaught of e-mail from fans. But the irony here is that for all the fan-boy loyalty he inspires, Lucas doesn’t make movies with the hopes or desires of an audience — any audience — in mind. In his fortress, the lights are on, but nobody’s home.

Forget for a minute that we’re the ones paying the electricity bill. “Attack of the Clones” is barely reviewable as a movie because it’s something so far beyond (and yet less than) anything an honest-to-God movie should be. It’s an event, a juggernaut, with a preprogrammed audience ready to like it whether it’s any good or not.

Of course, you could have said the same about “Star Wars: Episode I — The Phantom Menace,” and you’d be right. But as aggressively piddling and impossible-to-follow as that film was, “Attack of the Clones” is actually worse. Instead of unraveling the back story behind the first “Star Wars” (now, of course, designated as Episode IV) in any recognizable narrative fashion, Lucas has decided to tell it with almost exclusively expository dialogue and a handful of not particularly impressive effects thrown in.

In fact, Lucas seems to have gone out of his way to make the plot complicated, as if following the wormy convolutions of the tale were supposed to be some kind of test — forget actually caring for the characters or being enthralled by the magic of a story as it unfolds. The message seems to be, if you find yourself unable to diagram the plot and all its alleged intricacies in 60 seconds or less, you can’t belong to the club.

Which may be why so many people, consciously or otherwise, are desperate to belong. In the case of “Attack of the Clones,” what does your Captain George Decoder Ring get you? You get the crawl at the beginning to explain where we’re at in the story, which you’ll need whether you remember a shred of the plot of “The Phantom Menace” or not.

Ten years have passed: Padmé Amidala (Natalie Portman) is no longer the queen of the planet Naboo, but an important senator who represents her home planet in the Galactic Republic. Even though we don’t really see her do anything except flit about in the worst movie gowns since “Mahogany,” she apparently is important enough for someone to want to assassinate her.

An attempt on Padmé’s life fails, and Jedi Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor, again doing a fine Alec Guinness impersonation but otherwise seeming lost and alone in the galaxy as the one actor attempting to give a real performance in this mess) and his young protégé Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) are assigned to investigate.

The trail leads them to Count Dooku (Christopher Lee), and you know he’s bad because his name sounds kind of like kidspeak for “turd.” Dooku is a separatist who wants to secede from the Republic and otherwise stir up all sorts of trouble. Luckily, though, on a distant planet everybody has forgotten about, there’s an army of mighty soldier clones who are almost ready to receive their orders to defend the Republic. They’ve been grown from the earwax scrapings of a fearless bounty hunter named Jango Fett, who’s the last of the Mandalorians and also the forefather of a great Gypsy guitarist.

In other words, this is a story you’ll definitely want to take seriously. It really heats up when young Anakin and Amadala, who knew each other as kids but haven’t laid eyes on each other since the puberty fairy waved his magic rod, fall desperately in love. But of course, a Jedi knight isn’t allowed to have relationships with the fair sex, and a senator has no time for nookie, anyway.

Thus we’re subjected to an embarrassingly dewy scene, set on a soft-focus hillside straight out of “The Sound of Music,” in which the two roll around playfully together on the grass, each hoping to inadvertently cop a feel. Later, they stare into each other’s eyes on a moonlit terrace, talking in hushed tones about the infeasibility of inserting Tab A into Slot B. Forget “Spaceballs” — we’re talking “Blue Balls.”… Expand
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UNARMED_JORDFeb 26, 2017
Sets the standard at an all time low the attack of the clones doesn't deliver once again on any level, the romance is laughable and the story is all over the place.
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3
KingPeixeJul 2, 2016
Like all of the prequels, it has an interesting story. And also like the prequels, it´s badly execute: bad writing, bad direction, wooden acting, a romance subplot that is lousy and painful, bad action scenes with bad cgi, the most poorlyLike all of the prequels, it has an interesting story. And also like the prequels, it´s badly execute: bad writing, bad direction, wooden acting, a romance subplot that is lousy and painful, bad action scenes with bad cgi, the most poorly executed lightsaber fight in the whole saga (yes, even worse than the one in episode IV), Yoda jumping around with a little green lightsaber, ridiculous clone subplot to justify a line of dialogue of episode IV, an attempt to ruin Bobba Fett´s character by casting a bad child actor to play his younger self, and the list goes on. The soundtrack is good, though, mainly Across the Stars, the love theme of Anakin and Padme, too bad it´s the theme of a very poorly written romance. Also, both Ewan McGregor and Christopher Lee show pretty solid acting , considering that is Lucas giving them directions and writing their lines.… Expand
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3
Jota19751138Jan 24, 2018
This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. Bad story, loose actors, a lot of digital effect that was too artificial, another movie that like episode I, disappointed me.… Expand
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1
lewiswakeJan 29, 2018
80% of this film is stale dialogue and logic defying decisions. 90 minutes of no clones attacking, and this film has dug so many contradictory plot holes that it seems like I'm watching the lucid imagination of a fan fiction author.

The best80% of this film is stale dialogue and logic defying decisions. 90 minutes of no clones attacking, and this film has dug so many contradictory plot holes that it seems like I'm watching the lucid imagination of a fan fiction author.

The best thing to have come from this film is Anakin's hatred of sand.… Expand
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2
halo124Apr 3, 2019
This movie is even more boring than episode one and it does not have the sword fight at the end so...i should say why and it probably because of George Lucas's terrible directing to the actor and his inability to make people sound human whichThis movie is even more boring than episode one and it does not have the sword fight at the end so...i should say why and it probably because of George Lucas's terrible directing to the actor and his inability to make people sound human which can be demonstrated in one quote from the movie "i don't like sand. it's course and rough and it gets everywhere" and what makes it even worse is the fact that it was darth vader himself who says this.But even though i hate to say it the action in this movie is.... great its just brilliant even though you can tell it's fake it is better than the original trilogy in some places. You can't watch this movie and say there was anything worse than the "love" story which is worse than twilight......WORSE THAN TWILIGHT and its just so bad you have to see the movie for it… Expand
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2
CakperDec 30, 2019
ass movie no good man dont see please dont bad it no good is bad very bad ok?
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3
Toasty87Jul 18, 2020
The phantom menace is so much better than this so many bad scenes acted out.
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2
Cementer200Sep 22, 2020
STAR WARS EPISODE II ATTACK OF THE CLONES is a bad movie. the plot of STAR WARS EPISODE II ATTACK OF THE CLONES is worse the episode's plot and the characters are just as bad.
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0
Xolt3cSep 5, 2020
I don’t like sand; it’s course, rough, irritating, and it gets everywhere.
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3
keonbreezJan 28, 2021
Man, this movie sucks. Everything about it sucks. The plot, the acting, the special effects, they all suck. The only redeeming factor of this movie is that it introduced the clone wars which expanded the star wars universe. But that's it. TheMan, this movie sucks. Everything about it sucks. The plot, the acting, the special effects, they all suck. The only redeeming factor of this movie is that it introduced the clone wars which expanded the star wars universe. But that's it. The rest sucks.… Expand
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2
Roger_Ebert_IIJan 2, 2021
2/10 not enough meme quotes

Needed more CGI clutter.

"We won't be seeing him again"
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1
ClancyCheemsSirJan 15, 2021
This is by far the worst Star Wars movie. I can’t even watch it due to the acting, dislodge, and cgi being so bad. The story is fine I suppose but presented in such a ridiculous way. For example Palpatine wants Padme dead, so he tells DookuThis is by far the worst Star Wars movie. I can’t even watch it due to the acting, dislodge, and cgi being so bad. The story is fine I suppose but presented in such a ridiculous way. For example Palpatine wants Padme dead, so he tells Dooku to kill her. Then Dooku hires Jango Fett to kill her. Then Jango Fett hires another random bounty hunter to kill her. The the bounty hunter gets a droid to kill her, and if you want to be extreme, the droid gets bugs to kill her. Another example, Obi-Wan knows the clones are modeled after Jango Fett, and he knows Jango Fett is evil and working with Dooku, but he never thinks twice about the clones being evil. I don’t even need to talk about the romance scenes, everybody knows how bad they are. Overall this movie is a hard to watch embarrassment.… Expand
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3
TheTimeProjectMar 24, 2021
The shocking thing about Attack of the Clones is how little it improves upon The Phantom Menace, with it only being marginally better with slightly better pacing. Still, the overuse of CGI, flat performances, overcomplicated story, and badThe shocking thing about Attack of the Clones is how little it improves upon The Phantom Menace, with it only being marginally better with slightly better pacing. Still, the overuse of CGI, flat performances, overcomplicated story, and bad dialogue make this already too long film even more of a drag.… Expand
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0
ChristmasLoverAug 4, 2021
I hated this movie it’s so bad CGI is not good I didn’t like when Obi Wan’s hair I liked it when it was short in the first one and the third one and Anakin is whiny and it’s like he’s like a 5 year old
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2
DarkwingSchmuckMar 2, 2022
The worst of all the Star Wars movies, Attack of the Clones is an exercise in tedium. All of the problems of its predecessor are back ten-fold. Even worse, we are subjected to the most creepy and awkward love story ever seen in a major studioThe worst of all the Star Wars movies, Attack of the Clones is an exercise in tedium. All of the problems of its predecessor are back ten-fold. Even worse, we are subjected to the most creepy and awkward love story ever seen in a major studio release. George Lucas' blatant attempt at cashing in on Titanic's success sinks; this one isn't even for the fans.… Expand
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0
AV-Apr 28, 2022
i hate this movie, the sequels are terrible but my god this movie is the worst in the saga.
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