Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
Buena Vista Pictures Distribution | Release Date: February 20, 2004 CRITIC SCORE DISTRIBUTION
33
METASCORE
Generally unfavorable reviews based on 23 Critic Reviews
Positive:
1
Mixed:
13
Negative:
9
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Critic Reviews

Critic scorePublicationBy date
80
Los Angeles TimesKevin Thomas
At a time when crassness and dumbing down pervade popular entertainment, especially movies aimed at youthful audiences, Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen dares to be smart. Read full review
58
Seattle Post-IntelligencerEllen A. Kim
Only Carol Kane, hilarious in roller curls and wide tortoiseshell glasses, gets to sink her teeth into her role. At least for Lohan, "Confessions" is her stepping-off point. Now she has to find a film to be her "real" stage. Read full review
50
TV Guide MagazineAngel Cohn
A pretty little package whose perfect, fairy-tale ending is just a little too neat, the film's colorful wrapping includes veteran actress Carol Kane's bizarre but enjoyable performance as the school's uptight drama teacher. Read full review
50
The Hollywood ReporterSheri Linden
Girls ages 6-14 will get a charge from the fashion show, animation effects and, to a lesser degree, the cartoonish antics. But like most adolescent histrionics, the pic's impact on adults will be limited to mild amusement alternating with annoyance.
50
The New York TimesDave Kehr
Modest, mildly engaging film. Read full review
50
New York Daily NewsJami Bernard
A safely sanitized comedy with an important message about loyalty and individuality, plays to Lohan's strengths and gives the target audience a chance to live it up vicariously. Read full review
50
USA TodayClaudia Puig
This junior chick flick merely reinforces superficial clichés one associates with female teens: petty fights, intense highs and lows, and self-absorption. Read full review
42
Entertainment WeeklyLisa Schwarzbaum
With no Jamie Lee Curtis as a volleying partner, though, Lohan's chipper energy is, like, so totally out of proportion given the colorless pliability of everyone around her. Read full review
40
Dallas ObserverGregory Weinkauf
Tethered to screenwriter Gail Parent's adaptation of Dyan Sheldon's novel, plus the demands of bigwig producers, it's a testament to Sugarman's artistry that she sustains her funky playfulness--a hallmark of her earlier work--throughout most of this film. Read full review
40
L.A. WeeklyScott Foundas
Welsh director Sara Sugarman and the great cinematographer Stephen Burum (Hoffa, The Untouchables) keep the visuals bouncing along in bright, primary-color-intensive fashion, but the movie has no real heart and even less soul. Read full review
40
VarietyDennis Harvey
Minimally funny comedy feels like a Disney Channel pic that got boosted to theatrical after Lohan scored a hit opposite Jamie Lee Curtis in the "Freaky Friday" remake. Read full review
40
The A.V. ClubKeith Phipps
Doesn't have a mean bone in its body, but it's so sloppily assembled that even Lohan's charm can't keep it together. Read full review
40
Chicago ReaderAndrea Gronvall
A smart script by Gail Parent (Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman) boosts the first half of this comedy. Read full review
40
EmpireNick De Semlyen
Lola deserves detention; Lohan deserves better. Read full review
38
The Globe and Mail (Toronto)Rick Groen
I confess to a deep uncertainty about whether this can be rightly called a movie. A bunch of scenes, maybe... I confess to a cynical belief that Lola isn't actually a role but just a succession of costume changes. Read full review
30
Washington PostMichael O'Sullivan
It's a silly, giggly piece of pink-colored fluff, as hyperactive as its heroine and as redolent of bubble gum and Love's Baby Soft cologne as Lola apparently is. Yet the superficial sweetness masks something rotten. Read full review
30
Washington PostDesson Thomson
Even by Disney's formulaic standards -- is about as cut and dried as the phone book. Read full review
30
Village VoiceAnya Kamenetz
Smug, sanitized fantasy. Read full review
30
Austin ChronicleKimberley Jones
Another casualty of the uncomfortable branding so common to the teen genre, the same branding one sees in a film starring Hilary Duff, or Amanda Bynes, or the next sweet but bland blond actress that comes down the assembly line. Read full review
25
New York PostLou Lumenick
Shlocky, sloppy and crass adolescent comedy. Read full review
25
San Francisco ChronicleRuthe Stein
The movie [Sugarman] made gives little indication that she understands teen girls, dramatic or plain. Much of Confessions seems clueless and -- even worse for moviegoers of any age -- listless. Read full review
25
Chicago TribuneRobert K. Elder
It breaks director Billy Wilder's most important movie commandment: Thou Shall Not Bore. It's just not funny. Read full review
12
Boston GlobeWesley Morris
Every ounce of the film feels artificially upbeat. Read full review
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