Steve Persall

The Space Between Us is romantic science fiction with zero gravity and less to recommend.

The saga of North should appeal to anyone who was ever grounded or felt unappreciated by their parents. [22 Jul 1994, p.6]

In a holiday season when family movie entertainment is in short supply, Annie is bubbly enough to suit the purpose while irritating purists wonder where their orphan went. At times it's actually a lot of fun, and leapin' lizards the sun really does come out tomorrow. Right after the helicopter chase.

Shore's new "comedy" Son-In-Law proves without question that this MTV maniac is one of the most tedious one-note performers in any branch of show business today. Considering that his brain-addled manner serves as a role model for many teenagers is more offensive than his lack of talent. [2 July 1993, p.9]

Fifty Shades Darker is what you'd expect from encoring a regrettable one-night stand. Not a keeper, but nothing to gnaw off your arm about.

A comedy as lazy as Sandler's previous boondoggles.

Fans of either Smith will be sorely disappointed. The elder never before appeared this listless on screen, and the younger misplaced his unforced rapport with the camera that made the Karate Kid reboot so impressive. Only Shyamalan delivers what moviegoers expect from him, and that's a shame.

Jade is another thriller where convenient shocks substitute for clues and motives come from the groin, not the mind. [13 Oct 1995, p.6]

Reiner, O'Malley and a cast schooled in the Leslie Nielsen academy of deadpan hilarity make Fatal Instinct more fun than it has a right to be, without pretensions or dependency on past glories. [30 Oct 1993, p.5B]

The fourth episode in a saga that didn't need a second, Age of Extinction, is 2 hours and 45 minutes of numbing dumb and dull end credits listing the artists cashing in. It is exactly what moviegoers who made this franchise thrive deserve.

Danny Boyle's movie is meticulously crafted to artful specifications, written in Aaron Sorkin's torrential style and acted to perfection by a superb ensemble. Yet like Jobs' NeXT Cube in 1988, there's one obvious question that isn't satisfactorily answered: What does it do?

There is nowhere logical for the story to go since it wasn’t intended to run this long. Sex is everything in this movie because nothing emotional or thrilling registers beyond the moment.

Your Highness is drive-by directing at its laziest, linking late-night sketch ideas in a quest for comedy as difficult to locate as the Holy Grail.

At least This Means War is an equal opportunity misfire, with as much appeal for men as women, compared to a one-sided weeper like "The Vow."

It's genial entertainment, packed with the sort of nonsense kids love and a family-values message parents can respect, but it simply isn't focused or funny enough to convince anyone that Culkin - or co-star Ted Danson for that matter - has the chops for lasting stardom. [17 Jun 1994, p.8]

It's enough to make Kim Jong ill.

Blended is simply more of the stale Sandler formula that audiences wisely haven't sought as much.

Trapped in Paradise merely settles for being a genial diversion from the holiday shopping crowds. [02 Dec 1994, p.6]

What really offends about Hot Pursuit is its lazy approach to comedy, and so many short cuts making bad jokes possible.

Alex Cross is slipshod cinema hoping to capitalize on a star out of his orbit here.

The Hangover Part III is more like "Beverly Hills Cop," a generic crime flick improved by comical touches that shouldn't fit the proceedings.

In the end, this is a pleasant parable, brimming with Rockwellian visuals and homespun decency. Harder hearts will dismiss it as corny and manipulative, which it is. Sometimes there's nothing wrong with that.

The movie is geared to preschoolers, so only parents dragged with them may complain. There's only that Looney Tunes overture to savor before the Acme production begins.

What kept me laughing is the genuine camaraderie among Sandler's posse, the way they almost play themselves that perfectly suits this slim material.

I deferred to the wisdom of Grouchy Smurf (George Lopez): "I didn't hate it as much as I expected to. But I still hated it."

Sure, it's silly without shame, and predictably sentimental. But Zookeeper is the most thoroughly enjoyable movie for the entire family in theaters right now. I can't believe I just typed that about a Kevin James flick with talking animals.

You don't need to watch National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon I to understand what a sloppy comedy concoction it is; just listen. What you won't hear is laughter, even in a crowded movie theater. I haven't experienced such a silent audience for an alleged comedy since last year's horrid Stop, Or My Mom Will Shoot.

A timid new take on the old fairy tale, and it's pretty grim.

Rock the Kasbah isn't respectful of truth, or consistently funny in the way it lies.

Return To The Blue Lagoon is as pretty as a travel brochure and just as thin on substance and entertainment value. [02 Aug 1991, p.13]

The fifth edition of the franchise, A Good Day to Die Hard, is the brawniest and most brainless of the bunch.

Sure, the plot is paper thin like most reboots, but CHiPs is less about the story and more about the special effects and stunt riding, which are jaw-dropping.

Cohen and Pogue never get a firm grip on how they wish to play this movie. Myth or mirth? Terror or tease? Draco's fire-breathing aim is mercifully off the mark when buzz-bombing villages, but microwave-sharp when it comes to heating dinner. [31 May 1996, p.3]

The biggest target, however, is O'Neal, whose monotone and slurred lines deaden each scene in which he speaks. He's trying so clumsily to do this acting gig right and keeps tripping over his size-22 feet by absurdly wiggling his eyebrows or forcing a joke. You get the impression that he doesn't know what his lines mean. Finally, we realize that acting is just one more thing that O'Neal can't do as well as Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. [15 Aug 1997, p.6]

As a cinematic effort, Atlas Shrugged: Part I is competent; in service to Ayn Rand's epic novel, it's less so.

Basically it's Ghostbusters meets Wreck-It Ralph, without the sustained charm or wit of either.

Yes, this is a great time for escapism at the movies. But there's a point at which escapism throws what we're trying to forget back in our faces.

It's the little pleasures in mediocre movies that mean a lot.

A comedy abomination, tasteless and useless to a stunning degree, with storied actors smugly collecting paychecks for sullying their careers.

Fantastic Four is so mediocre that its title seems like a violation of truth in advertising laws.

Another paper-thin premise comes back to haunt moviegoers. [5 Nov 1993, p.5]

A bit dated in its feminism, making some jokes even funnier. [08 Mar 2001, p.17W]

Cena handles rough stuff like a pro, and his poker-faced wisecracking isn't bad. But he probably shouldn't quit his day job.

Everything plays out brutally, and the acting's not bad. But it's unsettling for external reasons beyond its control.

The relevant question now isn't who John Galt is, but how much demand there will be for what the producers supply.

Director John Schlesinger takes an hour to get around to the vigilante premise promised by the title and previews of his latest thriller. Eye for an Eye is a much better movie before he does it. [12 Jan 1996, p.10]

Flawed as it is, The Cobbler retains interest throughout, chiefly because Sandler isn't bad in a rare semi-dramatic performance.

None of these complaints would matter if The Bounty Hunter possessed even a smidgen of inspired comedy. It doesn't.

Through it all, Marshall sticks to his rose-colored principles: You gotta have hope, listen to your heart and take leaps of faith. Plus a new one: Parker should never make it through a movie without at least one pair of fabulous shoes.

Everybody's cyber-pal Ashton Kutcher is perfect casting for Killers, since the screenplay is shallow as a Tweet and the movie appears to have been shot with a Nikon point-and-click camera he plugs on TV.

For the love of movies, stay away.

The Last Airbender makes the cartoon version with its ratchet-jawed characters and clunky animation seem like a Pixar classic.

After a lucrative career of bashing well-made scary, epic, disaster and date movies, Friedberg and Seltzer have a source begging to be mocked.