Simon Abrams
Select another critic »For 854 reviews, this critic has graded:
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40% higher than the average critic
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6% same as the average critic
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54% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 10.7 points lower than other critics.
(0-100 point scale)
Simon Abrams' Scores
- Movies
- TV
| Average review score: | 55 | |
|---|---|---|
| Highest review score: | Viet and Nam | |
| Lowest review score: | Zookeeper | |
Score distribution:
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Positive: 390 out of 854
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Mixed: 239 out of 854
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Negative: 225 out of 854
854
movie
reviews
- By Date
- By Critic Score
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- Simon Abrams
While many of the jokes in Hotel Transylvania: Transformania probably won’t linger in your mind, they are still fairly well-executed.- TheWrap
- Posted Jan 10, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
This Changes Everything isn't a game-changer, but it is jarring enough to be scary.- Village Voice
- Posted Sep 29, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
As a filmmaker, Drasnin should not have relied so singularly on Rittenberg's testimony.- Village Voice
- Posted Apr 10, 2013
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- Simon Abrams
The Curse of Downers Grove coasts on pulpy fumes thanks to its creators' effective emphasis on circumstantial peril over character-driven drama.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 23, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Nothing in Moonwalkers matches Perlman's performance, but he frequently elevates desperate-to-please gags to stoner-comedy greatness.- Village Voice
- Posted Jan 12, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Liang and Zhang’s young heroes would be far more universal if they were just credibly hormonal.- Village Voice
- Posted Apr 5, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Assassination is a blast whenever the director doesn't take his melodramatic plot too seriously.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 4, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Like the anime series, Jujutsu Kaisen 0 sometimes feels too much like a Cliffs Notes adaptation, despite also featuring more interaction between the supporting characters and the lead protagonist than the original manga.- TheWrap
- Posted Mar 13, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
The messy but charming concert doc Straight Into a Storm works best if you treat unfocused on-camera interviews with the members of Rhode Island–based folk/grunge-rock group Deer Tick like an unintrospective but affectionate video memoir of the group’s rise to alt-rock prominence.- Village Voice
- Posted Jun 14, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Farrier doesn’t really take us to any dark corners of Organ’s life that he can’t talk his way out of, but Mister Organ does capture the miasmic anxiety that surrounds his mysterious subject.- TheWrap
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- Simon Abrams
The retrospective nature of this documentary character study requires some creative liberties, but treating one of your two main characters like a special guest in her own movie suggests that telling a better story was unfortunately the top priority here.- TheWrap
- Posted Jan 28, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
Infini doesn't go anywhere that superior science fiction films haven't already, but for a while, it's exciting enough to feel brand-new.- Village Voice
- Posted May 6, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
The darkly funny American indie drama Small Engine Repair works best when it’s a hangout comedy starring three schlubby New England burnouts.- TheWrap
- Posted Sep 7, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
While it doesn't cohere into anything more substantial than a collection of self-loathing anxieties, Japanese teledrama Penance is effectively unnerving on a scene-for-scene basis thanks to writer/director Kiyoshi Kurosawa's preference for ambience over character-driven drama.- Village Voice
- Posted Nov 11, 2014
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- Simon Abrams
Guns Akimbo may be too mild to be memorable, but it is a mostly satisfying time-waster.- TheWrap
- Posted Feb 19, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
Redeemer may not be as good as its star, but it does give Zaror enough room to shine.- Village Voice
- Posted Jun 11, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
There may be nothing new about America Underdog, but it’s still good enough, as far as non-perishable comfort food goes.- TheWrap
- Posted Dec 17, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
Hover may sometimes be unbelievably generic, but Osterman, adapting Coleman’s clever scenario, nails a universal power dynamic.- Village Voice
- Posted Jun 28, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Derrickson and Cargill successfully tailor their focused and mostly compelling narrative to a Steven Spielberg/Amblin Entertainment–esque bit of Stephen King–sploitation.- TheWrap
- Posted Jun 20, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Established “My Hero Academia” fans will probably enjoy Class 1-A’s typically endearing group dynamic, even if none of the jokes in the movie are that great. And their big fight with Nine is genuinely well-staged and climactic, thanks to some impressive computer graphics and director Kenji Nagasaki’s thoughtful staging and choreography.- TheWrap
- Posted Feb 26, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
Unfortunately, the best and worst thing about director Dominique Rocher and his two co-writers’ scenario is its familiarity.- Village Voice
- Posted Jul 11, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
[Shirai] indulges his subjects' lack of introspection and focuses on the ephemeral beauty of the brewery's centuries-old sake-making method.- Village Voice
- Posted Mar 17, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Despite its title, Drew: The Man Behind the Poster is not a documentary about movie poster artist Drew Struzan. Instead, Struzan's poster art is the film's real subject.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 14, 2013
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- Simon Abrams
A strong ensemble cast, led by Sterling K. Brown and Regina Hall, does a lot of emotional heavy lifting in the otherwise lightweight mockumentary Honk for Jesus. Save Your Soul.- TheWrap
- Posted Jan 26, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Post Tenebras Lux is certainly unique, but Reygadas is often intensely more interested in provoking his audience than actually fleshing out his heady ideas.- The Playlist
- Posted Apr 12, 2013
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- Simon Abrams
Pretty Lethal doesn’t even fully take flight once it finally escapes the realm of good taste, though it does feature a handful of standout moments and images. You might scratch your head a few times, but you also may enjoy yourself if you only want the filmmakers to embrace their unhinged high-concept premise- The A.V. Club
- Posted Mar 24, 2026
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- Simon Abrams
If you’re at all curious about “One Piece,” you might still enjoy One Piece Film Red, since it’s a better-than-average highlight reel for Oda’s ingratiating and vividly realized characters. Just don’t feel bad if you exit the theater feeling confused and a little unfulfilled; this new feature’s more of an oversized sampler platter than a full-sized meal.- TheWrap
- Posted Nov 4, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
There’s nothing wrong, in other words, with the idea of setting an all-ages haunted house-style chase movie in a corny bulk retail store. The main thing holding back Spirit Halloween: The Movie is that its young stars never get to convincingly act their age.- TheWrap
- Posted Sep 28, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Neither the action scenes nor the musical numbers stand out though, and none of the characters or their performers transcend their expected roles.- TheWrap
- Posted Sep 9, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Shooting the Mafia is, if nothing else, a decent introduction to Battaglia’s work, even if the rest of Loginotto’s primer doesn’t tell us much about who Battaglia is, or how to appreciate what she does.- TheWrap
- Posted Nov 22, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Unlike its predecessor, “Troll 2” doesn’t have enough canned dramatic or comedic incidents to make it seem particularly eventful.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 1, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
Bloodthirsty isn’t as deep or dark as it needs to be, and that’s way more frustrating than its general lack of werewolves.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 23, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
How badly do you want to see rabid computer-generated zombie-monkeys die violently? Because there's not much else worth recommending in [Rec] 4: Apocalypse.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 3, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Carpignano’s impressionistic plot and pseudo-naturalistic style also tends to boil down human emotions so as to only suggest rather than reveal complexity. The limiting style and characterizations in A Chiara are only so thoughtful.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 27, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
Watching La Flor is like being on the last legs of a road trip with a group of people you’ve grown increasingly alienated from. Look at the happy artists, they’re having fun playing with themselves; good for them, can I go home now?- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 2, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Judgmental and ungenerous, Alex’s story gives you enough answers to either tsk-tsk or nod sadly in response. The rest’s up to you, the viewer, which feels like a bit of a cop-out.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 14, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
As it is, “The Gardener” suggests that Van Damme still doesn’t know how to both give his audience what they want and show off his range.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jun 6, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
If only Baker and the gang had fleshed out horny hero Pikelet’s journey with the same earthy details that make Pikelet and Loonie’s friendship seem real enough to be worth mourning.- Village Voice
- Posted May 31, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
That opening scene is also, in retrospect, somewhat depressing for the way that it conflates a glib fatalism with an unbelievable sort of turn-the-other-cheek optimism ("If they hurt others, it's because they hurt, too,” as Benedicta says in one scene).- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 30, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
James Murphy never says that his music will sound different after LCD Soundsystem disbands, so why fearfully anticipate a change that we don't even know is coming?- Slant Magazine
- Posted Jul 22, 2012
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- Simon Abrams
The filmmakers over-extend themselves to solicit empathy for their doomed protagonists. Youth is so unbearably nice that I eventually wished it were remade by misanthropes.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 15, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
I want to recommend Don't Sleep because it is, intellectually, more compelling than many of the indie horror films I tend to watch. But I can't recommend this movie, mostly because it's not smart enough to deserve that praise.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 29, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
Burial has a hard enough core, both in terms of its central premise and its pulpy tropes, that for about 30 minutes, it almost works as a decent B-movie, right before it unceremoniously falls apart.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 2, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
American Made may be superficially a condemnation of the hypocritical American impulse to take drug suppliers' money with one hand and chastise users with the other. But it's mostly a sensational, sub-"Wolf of Wall Street"-style true crime story that attempts to seduce you, then abandon you.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 28, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
Never feels as momentous or as angsty as a good story about moody teenagers should, and that's mostly because the film lacks a menacing parental adversary.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 14, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
There’s a significant difference in quality between the mediocre scenario (and dialogue) and thrilling production design (and direction) in White Snake.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 27, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Even the most open-minded viewers may have difficulty relating to the two lead protagonists in Border, a cynical Swedish romantic-fantasy that follows estranged border patrolwoman Tina (Eva Melander) and her unconvincing attraction to Byronic stranger Vore (Eero Milonoff).- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 26, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
A light touch doesn’t suit the heavy themes in The Power, a horror psychodrama that’s specifically concerned with sexual misconduct and then more generally about the abuse of (you guessed it) power at a London hospital.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 8, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
This movie is progressive intentionally, but not formally, and the difference between its creators’ themes and consideration is unfortunately glaring.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 16, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
In theory, that sort of self-victimization could be funny; in this reality, not so much.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 10, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
Zlotowski’s stylized depiction of Rachel’s life is overly fastidious. Many creative decisions, from the score to the camera blocking, took me out of the movie. Instead of a complex character processing involved, compound emotions, I saw a talented filmmaker lightly touch upon a range of emotions while also studiously avoiding dramatic clichés and stereotypes.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 21, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
You know you're in trouble with a film when you're so bored by it that you wind up asking why things seem so implausible.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 16, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
There’s some appreciable serenity and a lot of personal grief on display in Out Stealing Horses, but it’s only visible in fits and starts.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 7, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
The film patly confirms what "The Lion King" already taught '90s kids: we should take comfort in knowing that everything in life is natural when seen as part of the "circle of life," as surprisingly effective voiceover narrator John Krasinski reminds us.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 21, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
This big, splashy blockbuster is perplexing because it's full of loosely-connected incidents that are rarely character-driven, or even narratively intelligible beyond a point.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 15, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
The first and maybe biggest problem facing viewers when they watch The Spine of Night is its drab and dramatically inert animation style.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 29, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
A few compelling emotions and themes are suggested but rarely well expressed in Nimona, a sometimes cute but mostly hyper and overextended animated sci-fi fantasy.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jun 30, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
The best thing I can say about Daniel Isn’t Real is that it’s a promising early feature made by young artists who haven’t yet worked out how to express and/or synthesize what they like about their favorite artists and their work. It’s all style and very little substance.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 6, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Informative but tedious talking-head doc Our Man in Tehran is for anyone who watched Argo and then wished to hear a ditzy, history-obsessed uncle ramble about the real-life political stakes of the 1979 Iranian hostage crisis.- Village Voice
- Posted May 13, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
The Banished, about a grieving woman’s search for her missing brother, sometimes feels like a compendium of modern horror movie clichés. That doesn’t always matter, since the movie is thick enough with dread to work despite its distracting familiarity.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jul 18, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
As it is, “Land of Bad” is a pandering drama with some action movie thrills.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 16, 2024
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- Simon Abrams
At some point, queasy horror-comedy Another Evil stops being about one man's comically vain attempts at exorcising his home, and starts being a weird character study about a laughably desperate wannabe exorcist.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 5, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
Jimmy & Stiggs is a slick wallow into a cranked-up, self-destructive headspace that frequently over-compensates for what it lacks in plot and character development with sheer vigor and volume alone.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 15, 2025
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- Simon Abrams
A typical Hong character performs the same actions over and over again, with minor, but noticeably different results.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 17, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
A sometimes diverting, but overly familiar series of set pieces in search of a good melodrama.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jan 4, 2019
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- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 11, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Arthouse horror flick The Eyes of My Mother actively alienates viewers by presenting episodes in a woman's life from a post-human, God-like perspective. Sometimes. Usually. Probably?- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Dec 2, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
Wiig really shines in the film, proving that her finely honed comic timing can make a character work even when the film ultimately doesn't.- The Playlist
- Posted Jul 16, 2013
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- Simon Abrams
The brutality of Tyrannosaur isn't so over the top as to make director Paddy Considine's sympathy for his flawed characters look like a sham. But it does frequently bring his film's seesawing exploration of blue-collar existence to the brink of collapse.- Slant Magazine
- Posted Nov 13, 2011
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- Simon Abrams
Sting has a lot of the right ideas but not enough inspiration to string them all together.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 12, 2024
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- Simon Abrams
Paley's segment proves that The Prophet is more of a missed opportunity than an ambitious folly.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 4, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
Neophyte writer/director Christopher Papakaliatis eventually shows an affinity for filming two people in love, but his actors often lack the chemistry to make us believe that their bond transcends all socioeconomic boundaries.- Village Voice
- Posted Jan 11, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
It's for-horror-nuts-only, but if you can see it with a rowdy crowd, Dead Snow 2 will appreciate exponentially.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 10, 2014
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- Simon Abrams
Four Latinx-themed horror segments of variable quality are sandwiched between a modestly amusing wrap-around story about a haunted traveler, simply called “The Traveler.” It’s not enough, despite some amusing performances and effects-driven thrills.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 14, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
This bloated, unfocused follow-up—which was tellingly crowd-funded by fans and then released by Fox Searchlight—takes all of the charming goofiness of the first film, and runs it deep into the ground with gags that either over- or under-think these stock characters' original appeal.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 20, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Unfortunately, Lau just isn't charming enough to carry the utterly forgettable The Adventurers, a tepid remake of John Woo's already lame heist flick "Once a Thief."- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 18, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
The Limehouse Golem only reflects its creators' lack of imagination. Medina and Goldman invest so much time in (poorly) misleading audiences that they say nothing memorable about the past, or why it matters to today's audience.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 8, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
With the uninspired pity party comedy The Day After, self-lacerating Korean dramatist Sang-soo Hong continues a trend towards un-productive self-loathing that began last year with the half-empty "On the Beach At Night Alone" and continued with the half-full "Claire's Camera."- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 11, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Sinister 2 may be ambitious, but its best ideas are, as they're expressed, dumb, unmoving, and repetitive.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 20, 2015
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- Simon Abrams
That kind of gallow’s humor defines the surface tone of Arkansas, which often feels like a riff on “Breaking Bad,” only now it’s more about how sad it is to be poor white trash.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 5, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
The most frustrating thing about the British prenatal horror movie Kindred is not that it’s impersonal, but rather that it’s not personal enough.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 6, 2020
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- Simon Abrams
Kampai! feels like a manic ensemble drama that should have been a tight three-man show.- Village Voice
- Posted Aug 18, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
It's refreshing to see Shark Night 3D director David R. Ellis try to pull off a semi-sincere second-generation "Jaws" rip-off, even if he doesn't quite succeed.- Slant Magazine
- Posted Sep 2, 2011
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- Simon Abrams
The Vault is not, in other words, just derivative—it’s also flabby and bland.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Mar 26, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
I’d have an easier time accepting the trite, asked-and-answered conclusions that director Muye Wen and co-writers Jianu Han and Wei Zhong lead viewers to if they were more adept at tugging at viewers’ heart-strings.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 9, 2019
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- Simon Abrams
Coogan and Rudd's generally charming performances both give weight to their otherwise wisp-thin characters, but their swishy mannerisms also speak to the superficial nature of Fleming's presentation of Erasmus and Paul.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Jun 29, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
The worst thing about “Scare Out” isn’t that it’s boring and ultimately trite, but that there’s so little of Zhang’s usual sensuousness in it.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Feb 18, 2026
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- Simon Abrams
A crashing disappointment, even if you haven't seen director Masaaki Yuasa's relatively inspired and completely unpredictable 2004 anti-coming-of-age fantasy "Mind Game."- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 11, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
The limitations of Palansky and co-writer Mike Vukadinovich's shared vision are, realistically, the biggest problem with Rememory.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Sep 8, 2017
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- Simon Abrams
Unfortunately, The Deer King fatally (and repeatedly) stalls as its plot starts winding down and its creators lunge for a character-driven moral to a symbolically freighted parable.- TheWrap
- Posted Jul 14, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
The Great Buddha+ is one of those movies that's much more rewarding to think about than it is to watch.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 26, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
Finley deserves credit for adding extra wrinkles to Anderson’s story, but Landscape with Invisible Hand doesn’t cut deep enough to leave a mark.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Aug 18, 2023
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- Simon Abrams
We meander from one story to the next until every idea, big and small, gets cast aside with childish zeal.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Oct 22, 2021
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- Simon Abrams
It’s not badly made, just uninspired and played out. If you like B-movies made with a budget and are specifically looking for an undemanding time, “Abigail” might be for you. “Abigail” might also disappoint you, especially if you’re hoping for more than what’s advertised.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 7, 2024
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- Simon Abrams
You can fully enjoy Belladonna of Sadness if you either overlook or participate in the objectification of a gorgeous victim.- Village Voice
- Posted May 5, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
With Nocebo, Finnegan and his collaborators have put their finger on something dark and disturbing. Too bad it’s never as upsetting as it is suggestive.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 4, 2022
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- Simon Abrams
There's something off about Beyond the Clouds, a beautiful but obnoxious Indian-set drama.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Apr 20, 2018
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- Simon Abrams
It’s not hard to see the appeal of “The Roundup: Punishment” given the technical polish and formulaic conventions that keep this series chugging along. But Lee still deserves better dialogue—“I made someone a promise. To punish you.”—and better jokes, too.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted May 3, 2024
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- Simon Abrams
Dog Eat Dog may be successfully alienating, but that doesn't mean it's entertaining, thoughtful or even successfully provocative.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 4, 2016
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- Simon Abrams
I was also so disturbed by this film that I felt I had to rewatch certain scenes just to confirm that the emotional exhaustion I experienced while watching it wasn't just a personal preference, but rather a problem I had with what Iwai and his collaborators do in the film.- RogerEbert.com
- Posted Nov 10, 2017
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