Michael Talbot-Haynes

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For 122 reviews, this critic has graded:
  • 77% higher than the average critic
  • 13% same as the average critic
  • 10% lower than the average critic
On average, this critic grades 17.2 points higher than other critics. (0-100 point scale)

Michael Talbot-Haynes' Scores

  • Movies
  • TV
Average review score: 83
Highest review score: 100 Peter von Kant
Lowest review score: 20 Lynch/Oz
Score distribution:
  1. Negative: 5 out of 122
122 movie reviews
    • 52 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Touch Me is worthy of the same regard as the great hard drug classics like Trainspotting and Requiem For A Dream. In fact, Touch Me is the new heroin beacon shining high on the arthouse hill.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    This movie cements The Lunachicks as New York’s best-kept secret, one that is too juicy to keep to yourself. It will hit you harder than ten bags of Alphabet City’s finest product, as it will knock the wind right out of you.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Mother of Flies is family-made entertainment at its finest, though it is best suited for families that have Xs carved into their shaved heads.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    While the material is right out of one of Herzog’s indigenous rainforest epics, it is lit like an Italian horror movie, with candy colored Bava-like blues and reds sprucing up that bush.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    I dare you to find Aita and press play, especially if you are resistant to giving it a try. You will be caught in an excitement flood from which there is no escape.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    A New Love In Tokyo does for sex workers what The Sopranos does for the mafia: it shows what the people behind the jobs are like. I wished I hadn’t missed it the first time and relished this opportunity to finally see it.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Sebastian grabs ahold of your attention and pulls it down to the floor.
    • 78 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Every frame will blow your baby dome to smithereens, as I can guarantee you have seen nothing like this.
    • 60 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    With all the talk of how wonderful Christmas pantomimes are in the script, the whole movie seems to shrink away from any tradition that may have made this pitiful excuse of a Santa sneeze enjoyable.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    If you want to see the shark device used with the precision of a scalpel, watch Beast of War. It is knock-out entertainment with many rows of teeth that won’t let go.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Even if you don’t care for saddles and sagebrush much, you are going to want to cowboy up for this one. It is an acid flashback wearing spurs. If you go out of your way for that old-school cool adult animation, slide right on over to Slide. It is another example of why Bill Plympton will always be one of the greatest animators of all time.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    With these performances and Thom Mills’s confident direction, Luderdale plants its flag firmly in gangster movie territory. For fans of mob films, this is an instant classic. It’s stylish, gritty, and ends with a bang that will leave you face down in your pasta bowl, begging for more.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Inthralled is a truly vicious work of art in a brown paper wrapper, just watch your fingers once it is open, as it has bite.
    • 73 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Every square inch of this picture is fascinating, whether for the fresh faces or those who have been fans of Cheech and Chong for years.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Monk In Pieces is a showstopper for the woman who stopped all of our preconceptions of what a show could be. It is achingly brilliant and needs to be stampeded to immediately in the direction of your choice.
    • 80 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Mothersbaugh himself acknowledges that the band’s curse has always been being ahead of its time, but it is fitting that we have finally arrived at a time when that is obvious. If you have not seen this legendary band play live yet, do so while you still have the chance, if you can. Whether you have or have not, see Devo as soon as possible.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 40 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Caught Stealing is a plodding meander that flagrantly overestimates its appeal.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Red Sonja is classic high adventure that earns the gold in its pocket by spilling blood the way that only a woman can.
    • 56 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Animale is the new state-of-the-art for high-end horror. It will have genre fans and art house aficionados weeping black tears of joy worldwide.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    While the delivery of the thrills falls into action territory due to the power contests, there is a palatable sense of dread kept up that will satisfy the horror crowd.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 60 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It’s All Gonna Break is a labor of love that simply doesn’t know how to share the devotion with the uninitiated.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Go follow this Trail of Vengeance, as it will turn your dull, dark evening blood red with delight.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The juiciness of the storyline overflows into a series of rushing strawberry rapids that will carry you away.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The way the musicians describe the happiness they get from playing, as well as hearing great playing, will make your heart feel; it is moving.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Bonjour Tristesse is a rich experience in more ways than one, while it also burns beneath with a rising secret fire. Give it some patience, and it will give you an unforgettable experience.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Daydreamers is the kind of high cinematic art that you fall in love with as it rips your throat out.
    • 51 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The Trouble With Jessica is like a tray of fresh out of the oven pot brownies: demented, dark and delicious. Get yourself a mouthful of this movie.
    • 80 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The Falling Sky doesn’t spoon-feed you any information; rather, it blows it up your nose. This production, without explanation, works brilliantly in immersing the audience in the electricity of the Reahu ritual. Not knowing what is going on or what is heading towards you instills a discombobulation that allows you to surrender to the void and go with it.
    • 41 Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    This is high-octane fun that you would do well to check out in theaters.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Zombie Strain is the THC-heavy zombie jamboree your lungs have been waiting for.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Two Women showcases the rampaging wit of expert writing with the jaw-dropping technique of expert directing.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Life As A B-Movie: Piero Vivarelli is an endless feast for hardcore Italian film fans, but it’s also a fantastic introduction for newcomers to the wonderful world of Italian genre filmmaking.
    • 77 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Soderbergh does the whole movie in long takes using a wide-angle steady-cam setup. It is a situation fertile for great acting, as the long shots allow these performers to really inhabit their characters.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The whole picture trades in the type of exotica that is fundamentally linked with the Arabian Nights stories, which melds amazingly well with the sci-fi tropes employed. The strategic use of location shots abroad, perhaps on a vacation, hides the fact that most of this was shot in Michigan, which is truly impressive.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 45 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    So, just know that A Complete Unknown comes off as really boring throughout. None of this will stop Chalamet from shining out with the ultimate movie Dylan. It is a tousled hair masterwork of a performance, completely adapting the essence of Dylan to a folk music Batman.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 25 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Kraven The Hunter doesn’t entertain. The only thing it does right is release the hostages after two hours.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    While a rock doc on the surface, Resynator showcases all the conflicting nuances of reality with higher clarity than previous documentaries. Here we see the real life we live in, where everything is both so cool and completely sucks at the same time. We also get to explore how a person’s conception of an absent parent affects the architecture of their self-identity. It is fascinating to see how, as different mysteries are solved, it affects Tavel.
    • 50 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Sit back and get ready to melt into your chair.
    • 46 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Werewolves is the best werewolf movie since The Howling.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 70 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It is well worth sticking your face into Hell Hole, as there is a prize inside the box of wood chips.
    • 39 Metascore
    • 65 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Watch The Deliverance for Close if you haven’t already done so. However, a performance of this caliber in a movie like this is like seeing a BMW 5-series being used to do donuts in a field of manure.
    • 61 Metascore
    • 70 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Skincare is the perfect vehicle for Banks’s style, the cinematic equivalent of a Barbie-mobile with 60s Cadillac fins. The audience gets to ride shotgun as she speeds through the flashy, splashy visuals to get to the long tunnels of persecution.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Close To You is ultra-real, ultra-important, ultra-fascinating, and ultra-recommended.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 70 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    While I appreciate getting a cult classic a new coat of 4K to be mean for the stream in fine fashion, Caligula: The Ultimate Cut is not your grandpa’s Caligula.
    • 63 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    To picture the depth of visuals in The Beautiful Summer, imagine a hundred beautiful moments in time standing out in sharp contrast like a string of Christmas lights.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The acting is flat-out wonderful.
    • 86 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    All you have to do is forget about watching the movie and let the movie watch you. Just listen to the thunder in the distance, overhear part of someone else’s life, and feast your eyes on vistas unseen until now.
    • 65 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Kalki 2898 AD is the kind of widescreen majesty that makes the butter of your popcorn shine in the dark. There isn’t anything else like it in the movies right now, so jump right in.
    • 59 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Of course, we have the magical Mr. McGregor, turning in a nuanced performance that gets into some very raw territory. I knew he had a range, but the depth McGregor travels here is impressive in its specificity.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Chokri’s work has a pulse that beats so hard it could split veins. Yet, it remains in a reality that is vulnerable to suddenly wacky quakes.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The Black Guelph is as gritty as gritty can get.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    This is everything you could ever want from a yoga horror movie. It also expands the boundaries of what the genre can achieve.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Esposito’s debut is an exciting arrival from a newly minted auteur. Fresh Kills is a fresh take on a familiar subject, with enough splendid brutality to go around the whole table twice.
    • 66 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    What You Wish For is everything you could wish for in a well-lit plunge into the abyss. The script’s condemnation of the class system is much more potent than the overrated, sneering misfire The Menu.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Backspot has the same punch as Run, Lola, Run. Just like that film, the thrills are time released into your system at critical points throughout your viewing.
    • 86 Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    This is a film that gets savored through reflection as you put all the pieces together and realize the scope of its achievement.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Roots of Fire has the power to make you a fan of Cajun music for life, while also (maybe) making you more of a fan of life itself.
    • 35 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Rebel Moon-Part 2: The Scargiver is the cinematic sci-fi equivalent of that delicious chicken sandwich people punch each other in the face to get. Unscrunch your face and allow yourself to have an intergalactic blast like you did before you grew up to be so picky.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The degree of ruthlessness that is achieved is stunning, as the skin of the nightmare of the assassination trade is pulled back.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Night Shift is an impeccably crafted, clever ghost infestation that has a lot going on under the sheets.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The Three Musketeers – Part II: Milady is a sky-high bonfire for the planet to gather around and witness legend in motion.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Yes, it is still the frenzy over the shoes that has stood the test of time and will be what will draw a wide audience to this movie. However, I think many will be just as impressed if not more so with the man himself.
    • 62 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The Actor shows how much fun there is in the indie sphere for regional values mayhem to be had.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It is informative and inspiring, with Sill’s spirit summoned for all to see. It is a great piece of lost classic rock history that so many will relish. It’s the kind of film that buries itself in your ribcage and keeps glowing for days afterward.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Lee Fields: Faithful Man shows that this planet is an even groovier place than we thought. You sometimes just need to hang in long enough to find out.
    • 78 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Limbo is a cinematic monument for the shadows of the doomed.
    • 43 Metascore
    • 70 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    This is exactly the kind of movie that improves on subsequent viewings, allowing you to enjoy it more once you accept the narrative on its own terms.
    • 82 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It is exciting in ways you cannot imagine and must be seen to be believed.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    She Is Conann shatters the limits of cinematic imagination.
    • 37 Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It is fascinating how Elordi takes something so deadly and still manages to maintain a shimmering vulnerability.
    • 79 Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The twists and turns happen right on point to keep the lively meter cranked up to a wicked level. You don’t even get that feeling that you watched half a movie like with other two-part pictures, as all the crescendos you need are included here.
    • 55 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    This is a unique holiday horror experience that can be enjoyed year after year.
    • 77 Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Bye Bye Tiberias is a powerful portrait of how broken things come back together over and over.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Stripping the glory from gangsterism like chrome from a tailpipe is the pulse-pounding documentary Man On The Run, written and directed by Cassius Michael Kim.
    • 31 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Instead of establishing and repeating the same flavor, we are presented with a sci-fi-tasting menu of increasing complexity.
    • 52 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It’s A Wonderful Knife is one of those pictures that is so surprisingly good you wish you had seen it in a theater. Plus, this is one spiffy-looking picture.
    • 71 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    If you have been fiending all year for a quality drama that shares a different world, then Frybread Face and Me is what you have been waiting for. Luther’s deft screenplay ably gets across a lot of complicated family business in just a few strokes.
    • 74 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Going To Mars: The Nikki Giovanni Project will school you thoroughly on why this great poet is so damn important.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The leads not only hold everything together, but they also hoist it all up in the air and twirl it around their heads. Gordon shows the richness of his comedic side; his bewilderment is infectious. Way anchors the audience’s perspective in his portrayal of what I took as a cowboy from Sweden. Gladstone is the standout. She holds a power as a western hero that creates a palpable humming sensation up your arms.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The cameras keep it lively, surfing on the laser waves of music. How they kept from falling off the roof is a mystery.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 70 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It will be interesting to see when the mainstream catches up to the street action of underground slashers. It seems there is an unquenched need for bleeding out there. If you see The Patrolman, you best pull over cause it will cave your head in.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 50 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Ardent fans of Brazilian music will be able to shift through this. Others, like me, will have difficulty finding the point in all the haze.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 65 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The story remains rooted in the outlaw couple on the run subgenre of crime film, but it then metamorphoses into an entirely different type of category. It has humor, but it is not a comedy, as the delivery and intent is coming from somewhere else.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Peter Case: A Million Miles Away is an eye-opening portrait of an unsung songwriting powerhouse.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Rub
    Rub comes out of nowhere and reinforces your belief in the magic of independent filmmaking.
    • 82 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Black Ice is the kind of film where you are in a different world once finishing it.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    What enriches this film’s frothy concoction is its strong intellectual underpinnings. The questions raised about how social media has increased public persona versus private interactions carry a lot of weight.
    • 48 Metascore
    • 85 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Prisoner’s Daughter is a drama that stings hard but also unleashes a lot of hope. It is a splendid reason to be excited about the great American indie again.
    • 58 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Watching Flamin’ Hot mirrors the joy of scarfing down a bag of the crunchy red stuff yourself. It makes your eyebrows raise, is instantly addictive, and goes by very fast.
    • 76 Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Squaring the Circle (The Story of Hipgnosis) is a grand rock and roll buffet with something for everybody.
    • 70 Metascore
    • 95 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    With Candy Land, Swab has delivered a historic flashpoint in the darker side of the film universe. It is a supernova of seediness. The flick is the true bastion of this under-utilized subgenre.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Gringa is an unusual hybrid of dysfunctional family drama and an escapist sports movie.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    I’m not suggesting Cherry should have a laugh track, because it is not funny at all, despite several attempts at humor.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 75 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Summoning Sylvia summons plenty of laughs and will hold your interest in its bony grip.
    • 44 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    This film is a pleasure indeed. The concoction of Agatha Christie elegance with Sandler’s teetering on the edge of taste humor is high-impact relaxation, like a warm bath for your frontal lobes.
    • 64 Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Unwelcome will work its way into your heart, one tiny stab wound at a time.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 90 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    Jimmie and Stevie Ray Vaughan: Brothers in Blues is that rare insider music documentary that skips the skin and gets down to the bone.
    • 75 Metascore
    • 30 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    It makes the mistake of developing the characters less in order to increase the chance of symbolism more.
    • 91 Metascore
    • 100 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    The documentary is the great American story of the outsiders coming in and rising up. You need to see it.
    • tbd Metascore
    • 80 Michael Talbot-Haynes
    While it seems on the surface to be a paint-by-numbers thriller, the numbers add up to something higher than usual.

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