Shallow characters the audience cares little about, an unbelievable situation rather than a potent plot, and, for those who don’t find men-in-pantyhose or poodle-poop jokes hilarious, not many funny lines.

In the real audience with which I watched it, the only laughs were from kids under eight or nine, mostly at hilarious "hooter" jokes.

If you give it half a chance, it will entertain you.

This is as close to a total wipeout as can be imagined.

Lacks just about everything on every level.

An uninspired, standard-issue mimeo whose only distinguishing feature is a reversal in its casting.

Its film school aesthetics and sophomoric storytelling are sense-deadening.

Endgame has become a nincompoop's travelogue, drenched in stage blood, fake beards, and crappy special effects.

A James Bond crib, minus the exotic locales, hot chicks, and finesse.

Although Steal This Movie isn't worth the price of admission, it is worth sneaking in to see D'Onofrio and Garofalo's splendid performances.

Mind-achingly mediocre in every regard.

Miss Piper single-handedly destroys what could have been a competent little movie about chicks being naughty and getting ahead.

Confusing to anyone who's familiar with the word "plot."

Loser sucks.

Reddin's script lacks the sophistication that might make the film's message about guns more than a 90-minute public service announcement with a good cast.

Rocky & Bullwinkle is the new millennium's "Howard the Duck."

Does boast, as a major plot point, a dog's bowel movement. And things do go 'boom!' quite spectacularly and frequently enough to distract from the truth that there is virtually nothing going on in this whole movie that Nintendo hasn't done better.

A frenetic, aggressively unfunny one-joke merging of "Beverly Hills Cop" and "Tootsie."

Inert, unfunny, and not even interesting as a dirty movie, 8 1/2 Women could well rank as one of the worst films of the year.

A cinematic lowpoint, even within its decidedly lowbrow genre, the teen gross-out sex romp.

While movie reviewers like to throw around the line, "This is the worst movie I've ever seen," this movie may be the worst movie I've ever seen.

The only danger in seeing this film is in busting a gut at its unintentional hilarity.

A fabulous movie if you are a woman over 40 who likes to use the word "empowered" a lot.

A bumpy synthesis of special and visual effects done far too over the top ultimately means Viva Rock Vegas is nothing more than eye candy, and not a very tasty piece at that.

The saddest part about 28 Days is it's more fun when it's drunk.

Formulaic and pretty darn plodding.

When worlds collide - people yawn.

This skull is brainless.