Shallow characters the audience cares little about, an unbelievable situation rather than a potent plot, and, for those who don’t find men-in-pantyhose or poodle-poop jokes hilarious, not many funny lines.

In the real audience with which I watched it, the only laughs were from kids under eight or nine, mostly at hilarious "hooter" jokes.

If you give it half a chance, it will entertain you.

This is as close to a total wipeout as can be imagined.

Lacks just about everything on every level.

An uninspired, standard-issue mimeo whose only distinguishing feature is a reversal in its casting.

Its film school aesthetics and sophomoric storytelling are sense-deadening.

Endgame has become a nincompoop's travelogue, drenched in stage blood, fake beards, and crappy special effects.

A James Bond crib, minus the exotic locales, hot chicks, and finesse.

Although Steal This Movie isn't worth the price of admission, it is worth sneaking in to see D'Onofrio and Garofalo's splendid performances.

Mind-achingly mediocre in every regard.

Miss Piper single-handedly destroys what could have been a competent little movie about chicks being naughty and getting ahead.

Confusing to anyone who's familiar with the word "plot."

Loser sucks.

Reddin's script lacks the sophistication that might make the film's message about guns more than a 90-minute public service announcement with a good cast.

Rocky & Bullwinkle is the new millennium's "Howard the Duck."

Does boast, as a major plot point, a dog's bowel movement. And things do go 'boom!' quite spectacularly and frequently enough to distract from the truth that there is virtually nothing going on in this whole movie that Nintendo hasn't done better.

A frenetic, aggressively unfunny one-joke merging of "Beverly Hills Cop" and "Tootsie."

Inert, unfunny, and not even interesting as a dirty movie, 8 1/2 Women could well rank as one of the worst films of the year.

A cinematic lowpoint, even within its decidedly lowbrow genre, the teen gross-out sex romp.

While movie reviewers like to throw around the line, "This is the worst movie I've ever seen," this movie may be the worst movie I've ever seen.

The only danger in seeing this film is in busting a gut at its unintentional hilarity.

A fabulous movie if you are a woman over 40 who likes to use the word "empowered" a lot.

A bumpy synthesis of special and visual effects done far too over the top ultimately means Viva Rock Vegas is nothing more than eye candy, and not a very tasty piece at that.

The saddest part about 28 Days is it's more fun when it's drunk.

Formulaic and pretty darn plodding.

When worlds collide - people yawn.

This skull is brainless.

Inane, irresponsible, immature, poorly written.

Even more frightening are the miserable performances elicited from A-list talent, particularly Tim Robbins and Gary Sinise, both Oscar-nominated actors who perform with all the heartfelt conviction of Hawaiian-shirt-clad teenagers in a high school rendition of "South Pacific."

Wear your boots to this one, but because of the crap, not the snow.

We're just over a month into 2000 and already there's a candidate for the year's worst picture.

First rule of a film trilogy: Part 3 sucks. See "The Godfather 3,"" Alien 3,"" Jaws 3." Even "Return of the Jedi" was just a rehash of "Star Wars" with muppets. Add Scream 3 to that trend.

Ah, young love. It can be quaint and heartwarming, but is largely inconsistent and painful -- kind of like this movie.

One-beat humor that is worsened by poor writing and editing.

Despite some redeemable comic dialog between Banderas and Harrelson, most of the movie is TKO.

It seems as if it was made by people who have never actually watched an episode of Star Trek. So all the old poke-fun-at-Trekkies cliches are here.

Oliver Stone must learn that edgy photography does not substitute for a story with substance.

A dud.

The kind of surprising giggles that make you wonder why you're laughing--- that's worth a few bucks.

Just not enough for me.

Would have been better suited as a television movie of the week.

Why do I keep having to see such awful movies?

A miserable failure.

Lucky for you, it won't cost a thing to get up and walk out at any point after the credits.

All it really propagates is overly dramatic scenes plagiarized from last month's high school date rape seminar.

Everything in it is old bat.

Without any trustworthy characters for young Joe and no actual story development, the movie drags.

I'd wait for video unless your kid's just dying to see "Sesame Street" characters on the big screen.

An empty void of tasteless action, formula plot, and dull dialogue set in a sadly under-utilized time period.

A poor excuse to put out a soundtrack of teen pop songs.

If a good laugh is needed on the next trip to the theater, please avoid this quack.

Words cannot do justice for this homage to Ed Wood.

A mangy dog of a movie that should have been re-scripted by a better writer and directed by a better filmmaker.

The film so strongly fixates on strange, explicit sexual acts that it forgoes any emotional (i.e. romantic) aspects of sex.

Really a big fat zero. Hampton Fancher has done the unthinkable -- he's made a boring serial killer movie.

"Speed" with a thermometer, only a whole lot worse.

There were only two other people in the theater where I saw it, and they left within the first 10 minutes. I should have followed them out.

Follows the current trend of once-popular cartoons turned into mediocre live-action incarnations.

One of the worst movies released this year.